Chapter One Hundred Fifteen





Eli's P.O.V.



I let out a deep sigh as Dani jogs out of the living room. There's no point calling her and she'll only panic even more if I run after her. She needs to take a breath before I go looking for her. I know today has been hard for her but I thought she was doing great. We managed to almost get through the whole day before she had a panic attack.



Arrow voices what everyone else is probably thinking, "What. Was. That?"



Ash answers, "Panic attack. Was that my fault?"



I don't want to make Ash feel bad by confirming that, so I shrug, "I think today has been stressful for her. I should go talk to her..."



Ash shakes his head, "Let me go smooth things over. I'm pretty sure I caused that so I need to apologize."



That probably won't go very well, but I can't really say that in front of everyone. Instead, I say, "I'll go with you. I want to make sure she's ok."



We see Dani sitting in the garden. She's staring at the ground but I know she's crying because I see her wipe her eyes. I hate to see her like this. I hate that she gets so upset and embarrassed by her attacks. I hate that she thinks we're going to judge her for freaking out. Our family and friends may not know the full extent of her history, but they do know bad things happened to her. They all know about her memory now, so they should understand she can't just forget things. No one is going to judge her for randomly remembering something and getting scared. I wish Dani would be able to see and understand that.



Before Ash steps away from me, I grab his elbow and say, "Tread carefully, man. She might not be ok with you going after her."



"I'll get you if I need to. Don't worry."



I shrug, "I can't help it."



He smiles sadly at me, "I get that. I'll be careful."



I nod and watch him walk into the garden. He approaches Dani cautiously, calling her before he actually makes it to her. I stay where I am, so I can watch and hear how things are going. I know I should probably give Ash some privacy to talk to Dani, but I want to know she's ok with this and the only way to be sure is to see for myself.





Ash's P.O.V.



I carefully walk toward Dani and say, "Hey darlin'. Do you mind if I sit?"



She jumps at the sound of my voice, but doesn't answer. Instead, she apologizes. "I'm so sorry, sir. I didn't mean to do that. I am so sorry."



I try to make my voice small and soft, "Hey, hey. You don't need to apologize. If anyone should be saying sorry, it's me. I should never have said anything about your memory and I certainly shouldn't have let Arrow push you into that..."



She lets her guard down for a second and I hear her whisper, "It's not like that hasn't happened before..."



My heart breaks a little at her words. I know unmentionable things happened to her, but hearing her say something like that makes everything just that little bit more real.



"I'm sorry, Dani. I shouldn't have allowed that to happen. I'm supposed to be one of the people who protects you and I didn't do a very good job of that. I allowed someone to pressure you into doing something you didn't want to do, despite you showing signs of discomfort. I'm an inconsiderate idiot who is embarrassed at a stupid mistake I made when I was in the Army. I didn't want you to think I'm a complete moron. I'm sorry."



Dani's voice is small when she speaks next. "It's ok."



"It was my fault you panicked, wasn't it?"



She shrugs, but I can hear the change in her breathing so I know something is wrong.



"Dani?"



She takes in a shaky breath, like she's struggling to get air into her lungs. I'm not like Eli; I don't know how to deal with her in this kind of situation, so I try my best to calm her down.



"Dani? Can you hear me? You're safe, darlin'. You're ok. I promise nothing is going to happen to you...."



She interrupts me, "Eli?! Eli?!"



She's panicking again and I have no idea what I've done to cause this. Before I can even process another thought, Eli is in the garden and at Dani's side. I take a step back and watch Eli work his magic. I don't know how he does it, but within a few minutes he's got Dani back to reality. I don't know where she goes, but it certainly isn't in this life.



As Eli is holding Dani in his arms, I hear her say, "I don't want to remember anymore, Eli..."



"I know sweetheart, I know."



I don't know how Eli stays so calm through these panic attacks. It makes me want to rip people's heads off.



I whisper, "Hey man, I'm going to head inside and leave you guys. Let her know I'm sorry for whatever I did to cause this."



"It's not really your fault. I'll be in in a little while. Just let me settle her first."



I nod and make my way back to where we left everyone in shock.







Eli's P.O.V.



Once Ash has gone, I'm not so worried about putting Dani on the spot, so I ask, "What happened, sweetheart?"



She mutters, "It's stupid..."



I nudge the top of her head with my chin, "No it's not. If it upset you, then it's not stupid. It obviously affected you or sparked a memory, so it's not stupid. Tell me? Please? Ash is really concerned about it. He thinks he's upset you. He's worried you're going to be scared of him again."



"He shouted."



At first I'm a little confused but then realization dawns on me. He shouted at Arrow back in the living room. That must have made Dani remember something.



"I'm sorry, baby. He didn't mean to scare you."



"It made me remember... They used to shout at me... I don't like shouting..."



"It's ok. You don't have to explain. I understand. He knows some stuff will upset you; he just didn't know what he'd done. I'll talk to him..."



"I'm sorry, Eli. I ruined the night. I'm so sorry."



"You didn't ruin it. You did amazing and I am so proud of you. You had a slight hiccup, but it's nothing you should apologize for. I will have words with Arrow and Ash though. They should never have made you so uncomfortable. I'll sort those two knuckleheads out. You know they weren't doing it on purpose, right?"



"I know. Eli?"



"Yes baby?"



"Can I go to bed now, please? I'm so tired."



"Of course. Come on. I'll sit with you until you settle and then I'll go see the guys."



I help Dani settle into bed and lie with her, running my fingers through her hair. Just as she's drifting off to sleep, she mumbles,"Don't tell them off, Eli. They're good guys..."



I smile at her concern and kindness toward Ash and Arrow. I place a kiss on the top of her head before exiting the room.



When I get back into the living room, the cleaning up is pretty much finished. Ash and Arrow spot me and they ask about Dani immediately.



I know it might be mean, but instead of telling them she's ok, I put on a blank face and say, "A word. Both of you."



They follow me into the kitchen silently, accepting that they're probably in some kind of trouble.



"What was all that about, guys? You must have seen the signs she was uncomfortable. I even told you she wasn't ok with that little show and tell, but you carried on anyway. We're supposed to protect her and take care of her; not make her feel like she needs protecting from us, especially in my parents home. That was so not cool."



They're quick to apologize and I can't be mad at them. Not that I was particularly angry in the first place. More concerned about Dani. I know they didn't mean to upset her.



"She's ok by the way. She's tired so she's gone to bed. Today has been an emotional roller coaster for her. She's not used to this kind of social situation."



Arrow looks angry when he speaks, "They need to pay for what they've done to her..."



"They will. They will."



Ash is more concerned and he asks, "You're sure she's ok, right? I really didn't mean to upset her. I don't even know what I did..."



"You raised your voice. She doesn't like shouting. Too many memories attached to that."



Recognition flashes across their faces and they both look shocked and then embarrassed. It takes a lot to embarrass these guys, so I know it's genuine. Maybe it's not the best thing to reveal the real reason for Dani's panic attack. It could be classed as betraying her somewhat, but these guys need to know in case they do the same thing again or she's with them and someone sets it off.



"I'm really sorry, man. I honestly didn't mean to set off a panic attack. I didn't even think about it."



"Unfortunately that's the problem, Ash. You didn't think about it. I'm not saying you should be completely stand offish around her, but you always have to be aware that anything can set a memory off. I always have to think about it. If I don't, I know something will happen. Of course it's not the ideal way of life, but that's what we have to work with at the moment."



I see that cheeky grin form on Ash's face, and I know his next words will be more like his normal self.



"See Arrow, I told you he was so whipped. If that isn't a sign I'm right, then I don't know what is."



"Shut up, Ashton."



"Whatever, Elijah."



My mom appears in the kitchen, "How is Beth getting home, Elijah?"



"I'll take her in a minute. Dani's asleep so I'll go on my own."



Just as the words leave my mouth, I hear Dani scream for me. That's never a good sign.



"Ma, tell Beth I'll take her after making sure Dani's ok."





I jog to the bedroom and find Dani curled up on the floor by the side of the bed. She has the blanket wrapped around her tight and she's shaking like a leaf. I take a deep breath and try to figure out how to deal with this situation.





A/N: So, there it was. Just a filler chapter and I really don't like it. It needs something; I don't know what but it needs better than what I've given it. I may go back and rewrite, but I'm not sure yet. Wattpad is still doing that weird spacing thing, so if the words are all joined together, I apologize. I have tried to correct it, but if you come across anymore let me know where the joins are and I'll go back and fix them. Thanks for your patience guys! :D