Hello again :) Get ready for something anticlimactic XD. Dang this chapter is like, 90% dialogue 0_0

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I backed myself in the corner of my seat and stared at Astly warily. What the hell was I going to do now!? He was taking me to who-knows-where and I couldn’t even get out of the car! Unless… I tapped on the window to see how sturdy it was.

“Don’t even think about it.” Astly said warningly, already predicting my plan to launch myself through the glass if things started to look bad.

I glanced at him and resettled nervously in a small ball in the corner of the seat. It didn’t look like we were headed on any shady roads yet, so I wasn’t too panicked. But first things first; clear up whatever crazy ideas Astly had about Las Vegas and me.

“So…uh…Las Vegas… yeah.” I said unsteadily, tring to bring up the subject.

“What about him?” Astly asked lowly.

“Nothing happened… and by nothing I mean nothing sexual, romantic, or whatever you thought was happening.” I said.

“Oh really? Then why did I see you two running by the classrooms looking like some jolly flowery-ass couple?” Astly asked.

How the hell was I supposed to answer that!? I didn’t know Astly now had a problem with me smiling with other people. “Because we were running, by classrooms, looking jolly.” I said slowly.

“Don’t give me that shit Jake. Tell me when you met him this morning. Just tell me everything and don’t you dare lie to me.” Astly said warningly.

“Will you let me out then?” I asked.

“Yes.”

I started going through the process of events as fast as I could. “Alright, so I was walking to school and ran into him, after I switched my shirt around, and we ran there together. We were talking and stuff, and because he’s really upbeat I started getting upbeat too. He noticed the bruises on my arm in the locker room and asked what they were. I told him I was mugged, and he bought it. Then we were called into the P.E. teacher’s office because the man wanted to bitch at us. Then, we hurried back to change and I dropped my phone. He read the text you sent and asked who LV was, because he suspected it was him because of my- our, nickname for him. I told him I was part Swazi and that it was short for a Swazi pop star Lololo Vavave- whatever. He bought it, we left, and I ran into you, the end.” I finished and inhaled deeply. Sure, I did lie a bit, but if I told him everything Las Vegas would definitely get killed! I just had to hope that Astly didn’t catch any of those lies with how fast I was going.

Astly had stopped the car on the side of the road and was staring at me. Shit! Did he catch some of my lies!? “Crud.” He spat under his breath.

“W-what?” I asked, bracing myself.

“I can’t freaking stay mad at you when you’re this gorgeously adorable.” Astly sighed in frustration.

“Let me out of the car.” I demanded.

“Nah.” He said simply before driving down the road again.

“What the hell!? You said that you would!” I complained apprehensively.

“I never said when.” He pointed out with a laugh.

“Motherfucking loopholes.” I grumbled.

“I love you.”

“Where are you taking me?” I asked, ignoring his last statement.

“On a date. Because I love you.”

“I never signed onto this! And we’re not even dating!” I protested in distress. At least we weren't going to...wherever he planned to take me if he kidnapped me.

“Fine then, we’re not going out on a date, but out to brunch. Happy?” Astly said stubbornly. Didn’t that technically translate to a brunch date?

“No.” I said, leaning back into my seat with my arms crossed. He wasn’t angry anymore, so I felt like I could relax a little bit.

“Too bad.” He hummed. “You might want to come though; Las Vegas isn’t in the clear quite yet.”

Fuck. “What do you mean?” I asked.

“I mean that your story was way too simplistic and I’ll need to hear again it in more detail.” Astly explained. “Because I got pretty confused when you started talking about a Swazi pop star.”

“I was making up a story because he was getting suspicious about the text you sent.” I said. “And by the way, your careless texting is also what caused that whole Spike thing.” I realized, glaring at Astly.

“How was that my fault? You’re the one who didn’t take a different bus.” Astly said defensively.

“I didn’t even get on the first bus. But because he was reading all of my texts that you were sending, I had to make up some story about a girlfriend. And then you just had to send a text to me and him that were unmistakably related.” I grouched.

Astly gripped the steering wheel tightly and stared at the road in silence. That was pretty damn weird for him.

I stared at him out of the corner of my eye, waiting impatiently for him to say something. I wasn’t expecting to suddenly be all quiet about it! I thought he would say some lame shit like ‘it was your fault because...’ or ‘I’m the one who…’. Crap…now I felt bad for making my psychotic super-stalker sad… well fuck.

“You know, I’m not really... mad about it or anything.” I said awkwardly.

“…No? Well I’m mad about it! Shit!”

“… I seriously don’t want to make you feel better or glorify your dumb-ass self, but I’m not pissed about that! Sure, I’m pissed that you stalk me and threaten to kill everyone I love; I mean, what the actual fuck!?” I glowered at him in frustration. “But, in that one situation, you were just looking out for me; it was just a coincidence that Spike was sitting next to me staring at my phone. You meant well and it was just one of those stupid coincidences that fate insists on getting me into.” I finished.

Astly had stopped the car a view moments before and was just gazing at me. Behind his damn sunglasses and scarf I couldn’t exactly tell what expression he was making though. “What?” I asked quietly.

“I want to jump your fine ass so bad right now.” He said bluntly.

“What!?” I exclaimed in horror.

“You heard me!” He yelled with enthusiasm. “Hell, you’re so… dang, I don’t even know how to describe you.”

“I would feel more reassured if you said repulsive and nasty.” I said fretfully, scrunching myself further into the corner of the car.

Astly laughed and scooped up my body before I had time to react.

“Wholly shit! Put me down!” I yelled in protest. How could he even carry me that easily!?

He effortlessly carried me through his car door and onto a deserted pathway. Oh hell no.

“Where the hell are we!?” I demanded, looking around frantically at what looked like a forest. I seriously should have focused more on where we were going while we were driving.

“The woods.” He said, walking along the pathway.

“How descriptive.” I said sarcastically. I began to panic more as we furthered ourselves from the car. “I’m too young to die.” I muttered in fear.

Astly groaned in irritation. “Do I really have to say this? I’d never kill you! Would I imprison you and force you to love me? Yes. But I’d rather die myself than see you die.” He said passionately.

“And I’d rather lead a peaceful life where I was never in any danger of dying.”

“Don’t worry lovely, your safe in these arms.” He said, squeezing me gently to his chest. That reminded me; I was still being carried by this nutjob! And if it wasn’t bad enough that I was being carried, I was being carried bridal-style!

“Speaking of arms; put me the hell down!” I yelled, pushing against his chest.

“No way am I putting you down, you’d just run away…and everything feels safer this way.” He said, completely ignoring my futile pushes against him.

“I’m afraid we don’t have the same thoughts about what’s safe. I haven’t felt this unsafe since…last weekend.” I thought a bit. “Okay, last weekend was a shit party; this isn’t nearly as bad.”

“Wow, we finally agree on something! Next, we can agree that we should get married.” Astly said, hugging me tighter to his chest.

“Or that you should move to the North Pole.” I muttered, pushing away.

“Jake honey, why do you verbally abuse me?” Astly asked jokingly.

“Why do you mentally abuse me?” I countered.

“Because I love you.”

“Where are we even going?” I asked quickly, looking around at what looked like an endless stretch of trees.

“A clearing, to have a picnic, because I love you.”

Shit, he was getting persistent with the ‘love you’s! “Can you please put me down?” I asked.

“I’m going to answer that with a simple I LOVE YOU!” Astly yelled in my ear.

“Ow, my ear!” I yelped clutching onto my ear.

“I love you Jake.” Astly said again.

“When are we going to get to the clearing?” I asked, desperately wanting to switch topics.

“Jake, I love you more than everything else in the world combined.”

I tried pushing myself away from him again, fixing my eyes on the path below us.

“I lllloooooooovvveee yoooooouuuuu Jaaaaakkkke.” Astly spoke softly into my ear.

“That’s fucking creepy! I get it-”

“I love you.” Astly interrupted.

“I-”

“More than anything.” Astly interrupted again

“Shut u-”

“I love you, I’m enamored with you, I’m obsessed with you, I’m infatuated with you, I-”

“I GET IT!” I shouted at the top of my lungs.

“I don’t think you do Jake. Whenever I bring up anything about how I feel for you, you start spouting random bull-crap.” Astly said crossly.

I didn’t answer; trying to think of something to say that wouldn’t be irrelevant. “That doesn’t mean that I don’t get it.” I objected.

Astly sighed. “Whatever, I guess it’s cuter than constantly whining and using my feelings against me.” He admitted.

What the hell?! Was everything I did somehow cute to him?!

“Well, we’re here.” Astly announced, stepping out from under the trees into a sun filled field. The field had a large stream flowing through it’s center, and patches of flowers scattered across the grass.

The place was like something out of a damn nature magazine!

“Isn’t this place cool?” Astly asked happily.

“More like gorgeous.” I confessed. “Do you come here often?”

Astly started walking into the field. “Yeah, it’s a good place to spend time alone in…or to have a date.” He said cheerfully.

“Or to forcefully take an abductee.” I added.

“Come on, I didn’t ‘abduct’ you.”

I raised an eyebrow at him. “You threw me over your shoulder and forced me into your car.”

“But you didn’t try to run away once we got out of the car.” he said smartly. What kind of weird logic was that!?

“Because you’re carrying me... and I did try to get away. Also, how does that even relate-”

“I like your eyes.” Astly said intensely.

I narrowed my eyes at him. He had a weird ass way of getting out of conversations. “Can you please put me down now?” I asked again.

“’Kay.” Astly sighed, setting me down.

“Thanks.” I grumbled, taking a seat on the soft grass.

“…You’re not trying to run away?” Astly asked skeptically.

“Where the hell would I go except back to the car?” I asked, looking up at the guy dressed like a burglar. “Besides, running from a serial killer in a remote forest sounds like something out of a nightmare.” I said with a frown.

Astly plopped down next to me. I could hardly believe that I was acting so calm with him. Just last week I would have been a panicked, maybe crying, mess. Now I was sitting next to him in a remote field and I wasn’t scared at all. Ha, probably because he made it damn obvious that he wouldn’t hurt me (Or at least no more than biting my lip while I was unconscious… the damn bastard). However, he also made it obvious that he wouldn’t mind killing anyone else.

I leaned back a bit, sighing to myself. My life was so fucked. Fucked, fucked, fucked. And it would probably only get more fucked as time went by.

I glanced at the guy who was causing all this fucked-ness. I flinched, he was staring at me. Or at least I thought he was, his dark glasses were covering his eyes. “What?” I asked.

“You’re alluring and lovely.” He stated, giving my body a once over.

“I’d return the compliment, but I don’t know what the hell you look like.” I snapped.

“I’m not ugly, so don’t worry about that.”

“What if your opinion of ugly is different than mine? Your opinion on what’s alluring and lovely is different from mine.” I said. I wasn’t being unconfident or anything, I mean, I thought I looked fine, but I was unclean, had bad breath, had a crazy bedhead, and was wearing frumpy-ass P.E. clothes.

“Actually, the last time I checked, you thought I was pretty hot.” Astly said smugly.

I froze, I almost forgot that I had met him from somewhere before this whole ordeal. I took the opportunity to look at him in case I recognized him at all. He was taller than me… or he was wearing some kind of heels. He also probably didn’t have really long hair since his hat fit over it without much trouble. Then again, I hadn’t ever met a lot of guys with long hair, and you could easily cut your hair, so that didn’t help narrow anything down either. Aha! He was thin!… or wearing some kind of girdle (you never know). Maybe the size of hands would help. And of course, they were in gloves.

I sighed out loud, there was no way I could ever conclude anything about him; he’d covered up every piece of skin on his body!

“Gave up already?” He asked amusedly. “I’m a precautious guy, there’s no way I would give you a chance to know who I was…because if you did, I’m sure you’d be pretty miserable.”

“Why’s that?” I asked.

“Because I’d kidnap you, and then I’d make you love me, and then we would have a private wedding, and then move to a small island where nobody could ever find us… or more specifically you, and then we would have sex all day and night forever and ever and ever.” He fantasized.

It always made me really freaked out when he said creepy shit like that. I stared at him in dread. “You’re right, that would make me miserable.”

“Only the kidnapping part.” He said.

I glared at him. “This isn’t some cheesy rom-com movie where everything will magically ‘work out’.”

“Yeah, more of a psychological romantic drama.” He pondered.

“Or a horror.” I added in gloom.

“Why a horror?” He asked irritably. Crap, you never knew what would upset this guy!

“Okay, okay, not a horror. Because if it was, you’d be the murderer and I’d be the first to die.”

Astly chuckled. “Yeah, right. I’d kill everyone else and have you all to myself.”

“No, I’d probably yell ‘fuck this shit’ and jump out a window… and if it was a paranormal horror, I’d turn into a ghost and haunt the crap out of you.”

Astly laughed. “What about a super hero flick?” He asked.

“You’d be the villain, and I’d be one of those random bystanders.” I said.

“Why am I always the bad guy?” Astly complained, lying down on the grass.

“Uh, because you are the bad guy.” I said, and then quickly added. “And don’t get mad, I just mean by normal standards.”

“But isn’t the ‘bad guy’ usually the hottest?” Astly asked smugly.

“I think that’s bad boys. I personally don’t think that the Grinch orthe Joker are really all that attractive.” I said.

Astly laughed. “Well then, am I a bad boy?” Astly asked suggestively.

I pouted. “No, you’re a mentally deranged boy. Which isn’t hot…just freaky.”

“Is Las Vegas a bad boy?” Astly asked sourly.

“Yup.” I replied curtly, not exactly thinking of the consequences…

“Oh, so he’s hot then?”

“Yup--no.” I cringed. “Not because he’s a ‘bad boy’, but because he’s just physically hot- I mean, he only has a hot body going for him- Um, ugh, I’ve just seen him shirtless too much today.” CRAP! Why did I have to open my damn mouth! I should have just avoided the whole Las Vegas topic, but no, I dove right in!

Astly looked at me in silence. Crap. A quiet Astly was a seriously peeved Astly.

“…Before I fucking lose it, you might want to explain why the hell Las Vegas was shirtless, and probably why you were checking him out.” Astly said calmly.

“He was changing during P.E. and forgot put his shirt back on. And I wasn’t checking him out, he was just there… or, I was forced to see him shirtless… because he’s an exhibitionist?” I said awkwardly. Fuck… if Las Vegas was in the clear before, he was dead now. I bit my lip with worry.

Astly watched me for a few moments, probably thinking. “You’re lucky that you’re being a cute ass bastard, because I’m going to make a deal with you. In exchange, Las Vegas gets to wake up tomorrow, got it?”

I nodded.

“Say that you love me.”



I looked at him in shock. “W-Why? You know I’d be lying.”



Astly sighed. “So Las Vegas’s life isn’t even worth three words?” He shrugged. “Works for me.”



“Nonono, wait a moment…” I protested. I breathed in, “I love…I love…” Why the hell was this so hard!? “I… I lo-lur-lu-mmmm… l-love you… Astly Mc. Murdering-Murder-Face.” I gritted out.

Astly chuckled. “That made me feel way better than it should have.”

“Ew.”

“Not like that. Anyway, Las Vegas is saved. Yay for you.” Astly said without any enthusiasm. “But next time, it wont be that easy. Next time, you’ll have to agree to become Mr. Jake Mc. Murdering-Murder-Face.” Astly said happily.

“You suck, you freaking murderous blackmailing fuck.” I said grumpily. Why was I always the one to get the bad end of our arguments? Oh yeah, because he was a murderous blackmailing fuck-tard!

“I try my best!” Astly said. “Ah, Jake, you make me so happy.”

I groaned to myself. “Why are you so confusing?”

“Why are you so confusing?” Astly asked back.

“How the hell am I confusing?” I asked.

“You somehow manage to look unbelievably sexy in a P.E. outfit, a bedhead, bruises, and un-brushed teeth.” He said thoughtfully, leaning closer.

I flinched back. “And you’re a murderer who’s in love with some average-joe, you think it’s cute when I insult you, you get angry at the most random stuff, you’re always watching me… and…” I trailed off, being reminded of something.

Earlier that morning, when Astly was ranting about how angry he was, he said: “Then why did I see you two running by the classrooms looking like some jolly flowery-ass couple?”. Why did he specifically say classrooms? Why not street or campus or school? Why classrooms? The way he said it made it seem like he was in a classroom… or maybe I was just paranoid. Maybe he had a camera or something…but still.

“Jake, what are you thinking about?” Astly asked sharply.

“Nothing much, why?” I asked casually.

“Because you had that…expression. The ‘I just realized something’ one.”

I looked at him hesitantly. If I asked him about whether or not he was in a classroom, I could find out whether or not he actually was. On the other hand, if I was onto something, Astly might decide that I knew too much and kidnap me… I decided that staying quiet was best.

After some silence, Astly spoke. “Jake, what the hell are you thinking?” I didn’t say anything. “Jake!” He yelled in aggravation.

Yeah, it was definitely better to just not say anything. I glared at him in defiance.

Astly sighed. “Jake, we’re going to get back in the car, and you’re telling me what the hell is on your mind.”

My eyes widened. Fuck no! He was probably just going to lug me to his place and keep me prisoner or some shit! I made a move to run away, but he caught me by the waist. “Let go!”

“When you tell me what the hell you’re thinking!” Astly said, grabbing me in a bear hug with my good arm pinned to my side, and then walking briskly back onto the path.

“No way!” I yelled, kicking at his legs.

“Yes way! You remembered something about me didn’t you!?” Astly yelled back.

“No!” I lied. “So let me go you shit!”

“What did you remember!?” Astly shouted.

“Nothing!” I yelled.

We reached the car and Astly shoved me in through the driver’s door, quickly going in himself and shutting the car door. “Jake, spill it right the fuck now!” Astly demanded.

Feeling intimidated, I stammered: “W-Well, things you said just seemed weird…and it fit in!”

“What did!?” Astly slammed his fist down on the dashboard.

I jumped. “Shit! Calm the fuck down!” I yelled. Was this really such a big deal!?

“You’re one to talk! You…just for-fucking-get it.” Astly moaned, slumping back into his seat.

What the fuck was even happening!? “I’m so damn confused.” I groaned, slumping back as well.

“I get that.” Astly sighed again. “I thought I took all of the precautions I needed too.”

“Well, it was your mouth that gave you away.” I said, trying to understand what in hell was going on here. Did he know what I was talking about? Because I sure as hell didn’t know what he was talking about.

“Really? Well, shit.” Astly said despondently. He tugged at his scarf. “Just SHIT!” He snapped angrily, yanking off his hat, glasses, and scarf with one motion.

My eyes widened and my jaw dropped when I found myself looking at green-blue eyes and sandy blonde hair.

He noticed that I was staring. “What?” He said questioningly with his normal voice.

Speechless, I just pointed at his face absently.

He furrowed his eyebrows. “What is it? You saw my face just last week…”

“SHAWN!?” I screamed at the top of my lungs.

Shawn widened his eyes. “Why do you sound so surprised?” He asked with dread. Shawn blanched in realization. “Wait…you didn’t know?”

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HAHAHAHAHA! Weren't expecting THAT were you!? I figured, why reveal him in a dramatic heartfelt situation when it can all be due to sudden and random paranoia and misunderstanding?

To those of you who are surprised.... -_- who else could it be? Why randomly bring in Jake's ex in chapter 1? I'm pretty bad at keeping elements of mystery XD Well, I tried. If anyone WAS surprised... *fistpumps*.

You can probably tell that I had too much fun writing this chapter XD Well, Happy holidays everyone!!