A/N: Not Edited.

THIS IS A REPOST BECAUSE >>> Some people weren't seeing the pictures... it depends on what you're using to read the story. If you aren't seeing more than one picture... try using the web version and not the APP...

Chapter 3 – Gabriel POV (Two Days After Shooting)

When I was little I always had a problem getting to sleep. Mina – my mother – would say that I should just close my eyes and eventually I’d fall asleep. So minutes would turn to hours and then, she was right, I’d fall asleep, only to get up two hours later. Being in the profession that she is in however, she’d question me, seek out the reason behind my insomnia, fear? The truth was, I just couldn’t get my mind to slow down, and each thought leading to two more and so on until sleep came because of pure exhaustion of the mind.



As if I needed more reasons to be awake, with sensitive hearing, the slightest noise would rouse me.



Like now.



Lifting my head quickly, hand stretched to reach for the gun hidden underneath Chelsea’s bed, I realize after a few blinks that it’s Nonno and James. My great grandfathers – Nonno – eyes filled with hate and sadness, but at the moment, hate and anger won out by a mile. “We got Amara, but you aren’t going to believe who else we got…” his eyes flicking to mine then glancing over at Chelsea. I see his eyes shooting from injury to injury, zeroing in, and looking to see if she had begun healing. She had, but it was still slowly, nothing to what she was truly capable of.



“I’m not in the mood for no guessing game,” I growled out.



“Francesca,” Nonno spat.



“You’re fucking with me?” my mind hadn’t thought of her, in all scenarios I postulated while sitting here, she was not one of them at all. I still hadn’t believed that Amara was capable of this, because those three men, they had to have a reason to be willing to shoot up the studio. She certainly didn’t have any connections with them, and if they were doing something for the money, she barely had any. So while I believed and trusted that gut feeling Rachel – Russell’s mother – had, Amara being involved didn’t make sense that she could be the force behind this disaster.



“Where?”



“Living with her!”



“Her who?”



“Francesca was sleeping on Amara’s couch!”



“How – how do they even know each other?”



“We don’t know nothing we brought them here first,” they were waiting for orders, but I glanced down at Chelsea. I didn’t want to leave her, not for any amount of time but still… I couldn’t stand back and let them handle this right now; I’m their Alpha. I’m the one they take risks for, if I can’t do what I want them to do, I’m a shitty leader. I won’t be like my father, I won’t make his mistakes. That in mind I close my eyes, inhaling. Exhaling and then preparing myself.



“Can you guys get Greta and send her in here, I don’t want-” we understand Nonno said surprising me, his eyes grave looking at Chelsea, and like Rachel I wasn’t sensing any hostility. He was in agony, mind-numbing pain but he wasn’t going to be one of those people that gave shit in this type of circumstance; he wanted Chelsea safe no matter what. To him, personally I believe the only thing worse than his mate dying would be if Chelsea had died permanently as well.



All of this could’ve been avoid if only – I didn’t have time to finish the thought before Greta entered to relieve me so I could go with the others, and I wanted Giovanni there as well.



The first room we went too, was the one with Amara, crying frightened calling out for Darren, “what’s going on? I didn’t do anything-”



“You didn’t do nothing and you’re crying like that? Pleading already? How you don’t know that we brought you here to give you some money? Or give you a chance to be here with your family? Why you going to pleading first?”



“I know who you are! What your family does!”



“Exactly, we give money to charities – you read that too didn’t you? How you know we ain’t about to donate to you?”



“I don’t need charity,” she snapped, that crying business gone.



“You’re right, you don’t need charity and since you ain’t leaving this room alive, you won’t need charity either,” I shrugged and then the pleading and crying started again. I just sighed, sick of this, “Look, you can get it easy or I could torture the shit out of you for hours, which I really need to do right now, because I can’t expel all this energy and frustration out any other way. Cutting you apart, limb from fucking limb that’d please me…” I said dryly.



“So tell me-”



As I was about to ask a question, the door swung open and in walked Violet who just shut the door behind her and in her hands was a baseball bat, I chuckled, “You came to play?” for once she didn’t answer just gripped that bat tightly in her hands.



“McKenna, my Nona and Chelsea, not to mention Dana were hurt, I already know you were involved because you’re fucking stupid and desperate and so out of your league here. But I want to know how this was set up and who the other two men were? How did you find them? Who helped you? So start talking, or I’m going to let her play with your ass,” I pointed to Violet with my chin.



“Francesca approached me in the hospital when – when I lost my baby…” she whimpered crying pathetically, as if that one little sentence was all I wanted to know. Behind me, Giovanni gasped.



“She’s lying!” He said trying to step up to me, but Nonno just slammed him back against the wall.



“Finish.”



“She – she was watching this place and hadn’t seen you guys leaving she couldn’t figure out where you were going, so she saw me leaving the place and followed us. She said that your fiancé was holding her brother hostage and she needed a way to free him. Vanessa – Vanessa told me that Dana, Angel and McKenna go to the studio place together and I told Francesca. Then she bought the guns, and paid the three guys and paid the people in the apartment upstairs to use their place-”



“What are their names?”



“They didn’t give us-”



“Bullshit, what the fuck was you calling them? Man one, man two, and man three?” sitting there testing my nerves when all I want is to get back to Chelsea.



“Pablo Santos and Julio Perez-”



Before she could say more Nonno shot her and left the room, Violet was going to say something but one look from me and she just hung back after one head-bob.



Everyone followed, Giovanni hung back, “Gabriel, I’m begging you… please don’t kill my sister, I’ll send her away-” I pulled my Glock out so fucking furious with him and his sister.



My gun shoved into his mouth, making him gag, I watched his eyes widen, “You listening to me Giovanni?” he gave a small little nod.



“My Nona and Nonno took you guys in when your parents died, my Nona spent countless hours being a mother to your sister when you had none, and this is how she repays that? By plotting and funding my mate’s death and are you fucking stupid? Jamie was there and those shots were flying wild. That bitch doesn’t care about nobody but herself Giovanni, this one,” I pointed to a slumped over Amara, blood pooling around her, “she planned for her people not to be there, she only wanted Angel gone. Did you get a fucking call from Francesca telling you not to let your mate go? DID. SHE. TELL YOU? GIVE YOU A HEADS UP?” I shouted.



He shook his head from side to side once, “Exactly, your mate could have easily died Giovanni and she did not care.” I pulled my Glock from his mouth releasing him and changing rooms just in time to see Nonno grab Violets bat and go to town on Francesca, beating her down until the bat broke in half splintering around the room.



When that broke, he shoved her on the ground, stomping on her joints, bones, “My Clara loved you,” he shouted stomping, as Francesca screamed out in agony, choking and spitting up blood but Nonno wasn’t finished yet, he stomped her good, avoiding her head, wanting this to continue, “Fed you, clothed you, gave you comfort when you needed it from someone!” he was distraught, looking down at her a broken man on his feet, a broken girl on the ground. His face void of emotion he shot her like he shot Amara and walked out of the room, leaving his bloodied shoes in the room to be disposed of with Francesca.



Find people they love, no children, kill their significant others, parents, everyone related to Pablo and Julio, you have three days! Do you understand? I told David and Rico over the link, walking back to Chelsea seeing Mikael, Jack, Casey and Logan all waiting.



“Do you guys want to go now?” Logan asked just as I was a foot away, “Go where now?” I asked looking through the glass at Chelsea.



“We know we aren’t going to be going staying here long but we need to go get the things Jason left for Chelsea in those safety boxes at the bank,” Mikael said, Casey nodded and Jack just looked… like a dying man, but still – he was looking out for Chelsea.



“You’re going to take them?” I asked Logan, making sure they knew I wasn’t leaving Chelsea right now. I know they had gotten one of the boxes from the bank when Chelsea was missing but Casey and Mikael still needed to get the contents in the others.



“Yeah… I know you don’t want to leave your girl,” he glanced at the door, and then back to me, “I’ll take them,” I nodded leaving them there returning to Chelsea.



.



.



.



Without knocking, Remy entered Chelsea’s room, laptop in hand prepared, stopping she did what everyone else did when entering, checking out Chelsea, going from wound to wound, to see if she healed more than the last someone else entered and sent word.



“I bet she won’t be on working that pole anymore,” Remy blurted out and despite the situation, I couldn’t help but throw my head back laughing at her stupidity, “Sorry…” she apologized.



While my laughter turned down to a few chuckles, I saw Remy staring at the machines and then back to Chelsea, “What?”



“Everything… her numbers just improved as you laughed… and the sutures for the gun wound on her neck are healing faster now,” it was small but Remy was right, the stitches looked days old while mere minutes ago they were fresher.



“Well… I guess that solves it, I should just laugh until you wake up sweetheart,” I joked still not really feeling it at this moment.



“How are you?” I sighed asking Remy, she looked half way back to her self, but the pain still in her eyes.



“Nope. Don’t worry about me…” she shook her head, her voice wavering, “That’s not how this works… you’re allowed and entitled to be sad, you lost a child Remy,” I tell her.



“Yeah, but I have Emmalynn and Jeremy…” I had no answer to that because I’m not sure that if Chelsea and I lost Ava, if having other children would help with the loss. So instead of being insensitive, I kept my mouth shut.



“What are the plans?” she asks to change topics.



“You don’t have to-”



“No. You don’t get it do you? This pack, you and your odd mate, are my family… I know your reputation Gabriel. When you found me stealing from you, you could’ve killed me; instead you gave me a job, one that I don’t think you trust many other people to do. Then come to find out your mate is a white wolf? Oh a white wolf that can,” change humans into wolves to boot? “Oh and her cousin is another white wolf?” Not to mention that said white wolf cousin has a child that shifted two weeks after she was born…



“I’ve made my peace you know? We are probably going to be moving a lot… not to mention when Chelsea gets pregnant with your pups…”she shakes her head hard, startling me when I look up and make sense of her words.



“You haven’t gotten to that part yet have you? Thought about it?” she snorted, “of course you haven’t.” she rolled her eyes playfully, “Just enjoying the practicing stage huh…” again I don’t want to laugh, so I just huff which only makes Remy bark out a laugh.



“She’s powerful, but pregnant? She’ll have more people gunning for her than ever. Those that can sense power… well protector of danger, meet magnet,” that sobered me up quick.



“Are you going to call in Onyx?” Our extra protection, did whatever for the right price.



“I want to…”



“But?”



“I don’t know. I don’t want to go to Clearwater just yet, but that’s the one place,” where it’s under a shell company name, the property I’m not ready to lead trouble there yet when we aren’t prepared.



Then what you do you want to do? She asked me again.



I’m thinking of buying an Island… control who knows I’m doing it, or where it is, and set up home there for a while let Chelsea and Angel and everyone else come into their gifts… practice and plan. Regroup – The guys returning interrupted me, with three four boxes each. They put everything down, not saying a word before immediately going away once again. Placing Chelsea’s hand back on her stomach carefully, I went to the boxes, opening the top one and was instantly surprised with the information.



Flipping through the pages I pulled out the first stack of papers, and underneath them was a SanDisk jump drive, “Holy shit!” I gasp after the third picture. A young girl, long brown hair in a ponytail, identical green eyes, Chelsea’s eyes, the same lips, I hand Remy the Jump drive since she has her laptop and wordlessly she inserts it.

_______________________________

Patrick Jimmy Lawson – 41 years old

~ + ~ Children ~ + ~

Oakley Savanna Lawson – 13 years old (Born: August 10th 2001)

Benjamin Trent Lawson – 11 years old (Born: March 23rd 2003)

Amelia Mae Lawson – 13 years old (Born: November 16th 2000) (Adopted by Pat Lawson)



~ + ~ Spouse (s) ~ + ~

Norine Williams 1999 – 2007

Sarah Hayes 2008 – current



~ + ~ Siblings ~ + ~

Diane Lawson Miler

Kelly Lawson Barker

Marvin H. Lawson

Grant J. Lawson

_______________________________

“She looks just like…” Remy points loosely towards Chelsea with her index finger, while I just nod my head, handing her the paper, hoping she knows I want her to check this information over.



But as she clicks on this one file a video starts up.



I look at Chelsea in the state she’s in, the documents in my hand and I’m unsure what to do… do I wait until she wakes up? Or do I see what this all means?



“If the Jason found them… what do you think the chances are that...” the Elders have this? Remy just lifts one single brow.



Waving my hand she plays the video, “Chelsea sweetheart, I was hoping you’d never have to get this information from this video. And since you’re watching this I’m sure you’ve already seen the pictures of Oakley and Benjamin. I want you to know I didn’t always know about them, if you don’t trust my words, which at this point with all I’ve kept from you, you won’t. Today is Monday January 20th 2014,” The face of Jason Hobbs, the man that adopted Chelsea graces the screen.



“I’ve made different videos but I wanted to make this one about them, how I found them. I’ll say that we, Mother and the rest of us, lost track of many things, you, Audrey and your mother are just the many. I’ve been researching and tracking areas that the Elders have sent people, known names and that led me to Middleburg, Virginia.”



“Last week, I was gone for a few days while you were training with Casey and Jack, that is where I went. I took my people there to retrieve DNA from Oakley and Benjamin covertly,” he had people but was killed by Leo? I roll my eyes but say nothing.



“Chances are if you’re watching this you already know about Jay Colt and your twin sister Audrey. The DNA we retrieved shows that you, Oakley and Benjamin have a familial maternal match. I’ve always been too many steps behind the Elders, except when it came to finding and protecting you for as long as I had. Chelsea, when Oakley was only three years old, according to word since there was no investigation, her mother – Norine – left the home leaving the three year old alone for nearly nine hours until her father Pat Lawson arrived.”



“When questioned the child said she remembered nothing, heard nothing and gave no information of importance. A ring was left on the kitchen table and some of her clothes were missing, but her car was not moved…”



“I’m supposed to be selective in what I inform you with, but I wanted to say this… Chelsea I was able to find this girl and little boy, your little brother and sister. The Elders were smart and never go there themselves but they do have others check in, which is what concerns me. You already know that you are meant to do many things…” he said cryptically pausing.



“Chelsea-”



“Hey dad you want to go get pizza?” I hear Chelsea asking in the background and the video ends right there. I take another stack of papers, and see different pictures of a woman and the file calls her Norine Williams – but if this is the Norine that was Chelsea’s mother she is nothing like I remembered the woman.



Putting all the papers back I rubbed my face roughly, my plans already changing, my anger building.



“This woman had other children? And she what just forgot about Chelsea and Audrey? God all the pain Chelsea went through and she was living in some small town, with a population of…” I looked at the documents laughing mechanically, “less than one thousand.”



“So basically Anya is Norine… or maybe she’s her sister…” I paced just looking at all the boxes wondering what kinds of information they held and where Jack, Casey, Mikael and Logan went right now. While Remy glanced at the picture that I saw of the woman that doesn’t look like the Anya I remembered, her eyes widened stopping my pace mid step.



“What?”



“Chelsea drew this woman and asked me to do a facial recognition for her, but I was so busy we had other things going on… I didn’t think it was all that important. I mean she drew her differently… in a way that had restrictions and wouldn’t have given me results that would be useful, but it’s the woman…” Remy says with complete sureness, even showing me the picture of the link, I collapse into my uncomfortable chair.



Right now I just wanted Chelsea to wake up, I didn’t want to have to do this without her, deciding and then making the wrong decisions.



“Don’t second guess yourself Boss…” Remy said softly, but I just wanted to hear those things from Chelsea.



.



.



.



My mind was in overload, Remy and I started in order of the boxes. The first set of documents we would were old bonds/shares bought under different aliases however, the signature according to Kai – my computer system – they were signed by the same person. Then I thought of Chelsea’s dream, Jason saying that he became human, however I doubt that it was true based on the dates.



In 1943, he purchased an Island sixty miles from Isla San Jose, a total of 110 miles from Panama, nearly 2000 acres of tropical land. Immediately, Remy began searching maps, checking out the coordinates and all we see on Google Map is ocean.



Resting back, I tilt my head to the side confused, “These look official…” Remy points to the pages before us, “but… its not?” she finished confused. While researching neither she nor I speak again, just checking out dates, facts on what we were finding, moving quickly. The only sound around us is the beeping from the machines Chelsea is up too, and us shuffling papers.



One full box in, the guys return startling us, and they come with a black 16 by 16 square solid box and ten books that look like the spellbook that Chelsea bound to our safe. Their expressions worrisome – grim.



Like we need more drama? “What?”



“Chelsea is going to be furious… hell I’m – I’m – I don’t even know what… the shit that she went through, that suffering… all those tests,” Casey who’s normally the jokester of the group was fuming. He dropped his share of books on the linoleum floor like they burned him.



“The Elders knew the whole time where Chelsea was…” he says but with a hurt and uncertainty. I observe him, eyeing him, his face, trying to read his body language hoping that he wasn’t saying what I think he was.



“Jason knew where Chelsea was the whole time?” I asked appalled. In her dream he said they lost track of her but was that even the truth after everything we’ve found out? He held so much back from her, I’m amazed she’s able to even let me in after the blows she’s taken in that department. So many secrets, I was just happy that with us… everything was out in the open, Chelsea knew all my dirt and then some.



“Inside the old estate – after going to a storage facility I might add – we found these,” he opened one of the ancient looking books, “there are notes just like what you received in the car signed by Elder Ethel but not all of these are signed by her some are signed by E.B.” The ones signed by E.E. match the print from my own card delivered to my truck.



Reaching for the book Jack holds, I start flipping through the pages, small pieces of paper with different information, no pattern but I do see reoccurring themes; coordinates, dates, named locations and people. ‘I’ve been researching and tracking areas that the Elders have sent people, known names and that led me to Middleburg, Virginia.’ The notes… he had someone on the inside.



“Were they in any particular order?” I point to the different stacks, “Yeah, I had the last three from the shelf, in the hidden room, nearly two levels down on their old estate…” Logan deadpans. With speed I take the one from the stop and begin scanning the pages, looking for a name and when I find it I stare down at the page, laying the book between Remy and I on the side table.



December 14th 2013

Oakley Savanna Lawson



There in the same print as the note left in my car was the date and name of the girl Jason said, ran DNA tests and proved was Chelsea’s little sister. Pushing her hair behind her ears Remy looks at what has be stunned, “this is what Jason meant by keeping tabs on the Elders…” I nod; the others confused glance between to the two of us looking for answers.



This – all of it – is just so much more than I was ever anticipating, eyeballing Chelsea so many questions come to mind and not just about her really. About, Angel, and Rainy, the struggles they’ve had, how much of all of it could have been avoided. With what I’m seeing here, the boxes and books, and secrets… I could see why her third wolf said we weren’t ready. There was just so much that she – we – didn’t know and now mid problem the only solution I could think of was run and hide for a while. Get the hell out. Then trust your gut! This was supposed to be easy but so far nothing had been, not even close.



“Boss…” Remy pulled me from my thoughts, I sighed deliberating, literally finding holes in each plan, each option that I came up with, finding the best path so we had no loses… we’ve had too many already and this was just the beginning. The truth was I needed to regroup, find out what every other fucker knew that I didn’t, that was the only way to be on top, crawl and sweat my way up there and then, work twice as hard to stay on top.



“Look… I have a plan but we need to go through all this and make sense of it all as well, I’d prefer that Chelsea was awake but we leave in three days and I want to make the right decision leave things stable before I hand them over. Everyone Chelsea and I trust is in this room right now-” Remy snorted, biting her lip. Between the two of them… five people… the thought humorous and in another time or place I’d laugh. Billions of people in the world… only five in the room.



Ha. Ha. I sent over the link, letting her know I was listening, “Three days?” Mikael pushed on, “Nonno wants to bury Nona in Italy, we go but after – we're gone.”



“To where?” and right there was the million dollar questions. Looking at the documents we already searched, the maps Remy printed, I pointed to the spot in blue. The ocean where an Island – according to documents – was supposed to be, “We go here,” I smirk.



They leaned forward to get a glimpse of the picture, “to – to the ocean?” Casey asked carefully like I was out of my mind.



“No…” I shook my head, “Lets start from the beginning. You all need to watch this first,” I say signaling Remy to start the video we just watched and we begin the whirlwind process that would keep us from the Elders reach for a while.



Hopefully.

.

.

.

Oakley (Bumblebee) POV - November 19th 2014

Three days after the prologue

Waking up the second time after I spoke to Dad and Uncle Grant was just as disappointing if not worse that the first.



I thought back to all what I said, not really stewing or regretting my words, but not any freer or lighthearted either.



I’m not sure why, I think it was because I knew nothing was going to be changing regardless of clearing the air and letting the darkness, that filled me go.



It was just in there for so long, festering that I didn’t know how else to feel but angry, sad and detached.



I’ve felt for so long that it was just me and my shadow during the day and at night I’m at my loneliest, you’ll always have me Oakley, I know you don’t understand now, but we’re going to be okay… I take that back, my shadow, the voices and me.



You don’t believe you’re truly crazy… the voice said.



Doing what I always do, I ignore it. Or myself.



Thinking of alternatives, ‘you’re such a bright girl Oakley, I want you to think of positive things, reachable goals you could set or changes you can make in the short term, for our next session,’ Dr. Wagner told me. Although I’m not sure why, six years in and nothings changed the way I’d like it too, I was trying, so hard for a while I felt just… lifeless. So I think of my options… things I could change right now and start small coming up with a few but still not getting my hopes too high.



Sluggish, I dose off before waking up again to find Dad, Uncle Grant and Dr. Wagner in my room waiting for me to wake.



Dr. Wagner was different; she seemed less small town hick and more big city kind of girl, wild dark red hair, bright Hazel eyes and her nose was pierced. Since Middleburg – our tiny little town – was gossip central she was also the subject of many hushed conversations. Luckily – un like myself – her hearing was not as great so she didn’t live hearing what I did.



“How are you feeling Oakley?” I eyed the bandaged wrist before giving her a tight smile, coupled with a shoulder shrug. “Message received…” she moved to sit at the end of my bed, “I’d like to talk to you about how you’re feeling – how you’ve been feeling? We touched on that subject before and said you needed time to find the right words-” I scrunched my nose and surprisingly she just stopped talking.



“What were you thinking as I just said that?” her face kind, opening and welcoming. No harshness or fakeness in her eyes, ‘don’t trust anyone bumblebee.’ I heard reflexively as always and reigned myself in. I eyed Dad and uncle Grant, “Do – would you feel more comfortable if we spoke alone first? Your father and uncle would understand…” she said again, placating and it was like I woke up in an alternate reality of some kind where my feelings, even facial expressions mattered, because Dad nodded encouragingly.



I thought back to my options, the different things I could try to change to make things better even though when I got out of here, whenever that was, I’d still have to see a therapist and no matter the option secrets were all counterproductive.



“No,” I whispered, “they can both stay…”



Dr. Wagner smiled kindly, “Well then, can you tell me what you were thinking?”



“I was thinking why it mattered.”



“Can you elaborate on that?” I shook my head.



“That’s fine, we can touch back later on that. Can you tell me about home?” she asked although this wasn’t the first time, but it was the first time Dad and Uncle Grant would hear my response.



“I live with Dad, and my little brother Ben, Sarah and her daughter Amelia.”



“In your mind do you believe that you and Sarah get along?”



“No, we don’t but I also don’t want to try to anymore either,” be honest, I had to be honest as possible.



“Do you have a reason why?” I did, but I couldn’t really say that, ‘well you know, I’ve gotten better hearing and can hear her talking about my mother and myself even when she’s outside and the windows are closed…’ So I once again trimmed my response.



“Because I’ll never forget the things she has said or done. Even if I wanted to I can’t,” that was the truth too, I could remember the first time she said something that hurt me. I didn’t have super clear hearing either.



“Can you tell us what you mean?”



“She said what kind of mother would leave a little girl for some guy. I was seven years old. Then dad threw away pictures of mom. Around the same time, her mom was at our house, and asked Sarah when she would start to make this her home, show dad that she really wanted to be there…” I paused remembering the night they were under my bedroom window speaking outside, “Sarah told dad that she would feel better, more at home if dad changed this. The way it was… It was decorated by my mom and it wasn’t her style.”



I avoid my dads’ questioning eyes, “They were on the porch underneath my bedroom window, I was listening,” I closed my eyes remembering, “Sarah said ‘How are Oakley and Ben supposed to embrace me as a friend or mother figure Pat when you have so many reminders of the woman that left you, left them?’ That this was a new start for everyone.”



“She said that she knows it’ll take time, but she wanted to have a good relationship with us, like he had with Amelia…” Her saying that and the way she tried made it hard to hate her, so I did try to give her chances but it was always one step forward, two steps back until I couldn’t even force myself to try and accept her. Now I was just…



“So you were upset she was taking your moms place and your mom could come back-” I shook my head not meeting anyone’s eyes. This wasn’t a question she asked me about before.



“You don’t think it’s a possibility that your mom could come back?” I could feel Dad and uncle Grant looking at me.



“Mom isn’t coming back, no amount of love can bring her back, but Sarah came in and changed everything, made herself comfortable in my home. She talks badly about my mom, like she’s better than her, but she’ll never be as strong, brave or smart as my mom. She’ll never love daddy or Ben more than my mom, and I don’t want her. I don’t want her as a mom, as someone to look up to, or as a friend. She’s welcomed to her opinion of Momma, but I never hear daddy talking bad about Amelia’s birth dad, and he left her before she was even born. He didn’t even want to try to be her dad."

"I can’t love someone that talks badly about my mom, she and mom weren’t friends, she doesn’t know who mom was,” I said my eyes watering, hurting that no one knew just who my mom was. Just what happened that night, talking about her like she was lower than dirt when that’s not who she was at all…



I looked up at Dr. Wagner, “No one is perfect, but she bad mouths mom. I can’t respect her, I can’t look up to someone that listens to rumors and I won’t give her a chance when not only does she do all that, her entire family talks about my mom like they knew her… I don’t matter to myself, but Sarah and Amelia don’t matter to me either…” I try to explain but it’s not coming out right.



The taunts hurt me, but the only way I can make them not hurt as bad as they do is to make sure I don’t care for them. It would be worse then. If it was dad calling mom all those bad names… I don’t say more, just knit and twist my hands on my lap nervously, knowing we’re going to discuss my safety plan.



“Dr. Wagner cleared her throat, giving me a moment, “Do you doubt her love for your dad or Ben?” I shook my head, the tears falling.



“You-”



“I don’t-”



“Go ahead Oakley,” she encouraged me.



When I don’t start speaking right away Dr. Wagner helps me along, “Is this about your Safety Plan? The small goal and options I asked you to think of?” I nodded thankful.



“Okay… so why don’t you tell us what we can do to help you? What you want to do for yourself? Techniques you’ve thought of that will help you when you’re feeling overwhelmed or down?”



“I don’t want to live with her anymore, I – I want to live with uncle Grant,” I whispered; only concentrating on Dr. Wagner. I didn’t want dad to be sad but I just… I needed to be away from her.



“Bee…” dad murmured sadly, swallowing, his blue eyes red, watery and his Adams apple bobbed but he didn’t say more than that.



I turned to uncle Grant, “Can I?” I asked not getting my hopes up, but he’s been begging me to tell him what’s wrong unlike everyone else.



He flicked his eyes towards dad, “That can be an option…” he said after a few tense moments and I felt lighter, I released a breath I didn’t even realize I was holding in my chest.



“You have a home Oakley-” did I really? It didn’t seem that way. I knew that I had more than most people have, and that I shouldn’t be selfish but to feel as unwanted as I did, in my own home… didn’t seem like much of an option. Of a good way to live. I could’ve gone to the boarding school – Foxcroft School – it was only a few miles away from dad and Ben, but after this… I doubt they’d okay it, when they hadn’t before.



So I just sighed, “I love you daddy, but I dislike Sarah more than I love you,” his heart raced and for that tiny moment I could hear it, I’m startled. I’m not supposed to be able to do that… how can I do that?



Dad nodding brings me back, “You have to stay here a few more days Oakley but maybe after you’ve done more talking, we can try bringing in Sarah and talk as a family, maybe you’ll have a change-”



I looked at Dr. Wagner, who actually nodded in encouragement, ‘Oakley, you can’t say what you think people want to hear, you’ve done that for six years, it didn’t make you happy, did it?’ the conversation from yesterday clear in my mind, “Daddy, the chance of me having a change of heart is as likely as you giving birth…”



Ugly green meets, shiny blue, “Oak… you know… I think the real person you’re angry with is me,” dad heaves, shuddering as he exhales.



I shake my head at him, “uh uh, you’ve never said bad things about mom, you just tell everyone that she left you… I’ve never heard you say that it was for another person. I understand you let Sarah change things because you love her, you adopted Amelia because you love her as well-”



“I love you as well Oak,” he said his voice thick of emotion, blue eyes begging unbelieving green.



“Oak you can’t just give in without letting us all try-”



“Dad, we’ve been trying for six years, I’m all tried out. I don’t have the energy to try anymore, to try and not let her words hurt me. It’s not my home anymore-” I didn’t want to finish answering, I didn’t want to have this battle.



“Bumblebee, can I ask you something?” dad said after a beat, I dipped my head slowly.



“Why aren’t you mad at your mom for leaving?” my heart skipped and the stupid machine I was hooked up to beeped quickly, making me pant twice before I settled. He hadn’t asked me something like that for a long time now, and I – for a moment couldn’t think of any answer that would do all the secrets I was holding – moms and mine – justice so I went with what I knew. What I started to faced seven years ago when I could piece everything together, enough to remember just what happened that night, “Because she loved me, you and Ben, but no amount of love I have for her will bring her back.”

________________________________

So... Vote... Comment... Thoughts? (i REALLY want to hear from you guys...)

So you guys know... Middleburg, Va is a real place lol... there is an aerial view of the small town... ---->> and other shots so you guys can see Oakley's world... school(Middleburg Academy)... etc.

© 2015 new_season All Rights Reserved