A/N: Not Edited.

Chapter 4 – Chelsea POV (Three days after the shooting)



“Chelsea is my main concern right now…”



“If she isn’t hopeful or doesn’t have the will to live she won’t survive a shift…” the voices tune out again.



‘beep’



‘beep’



‘beep’





Minus that annoying beep, I was in a quiet room or area, it smelt heavily of Gabriel, antiseptic and myself. My eyes still closed, my body felt stiff, weighed down and much too drowsy, even twitching a finger felt like a marathon, much less opening said eyes. I tired to listen instead and focused on heartbeats, and I could make out three distinct ones.



“Momma waking up?” a tiny sweet voice chirped, Ava. Sensations were returning, which was how I knew they were missing in the first place. Hands were on me, two bigger ones and then one tiny.



“Chelsea? Sweetheart, can you hear us? It’s me… you’re okay-” the worry in Gabriel’s voice… I didn’t like it so I tried to squeeze my hand around the one causing tingles to shoot up my arms. “Ohhhh,” the relief evident, “there’s my girl,” Gabriel said with a smile I’m sure, but I couldn’t see it. Why couldn’t I see it? I thought frustratingly.



I rolled my eyes behind my lids, wanting to reach up to touch my face but I had no energy to do so either. I let out a whimpering sound, nothing understandable to my own ears, but the effort to do that wasn’t there at all, nor could I seem to control my lips. It was like I had no control over my body, “Hold on, there’s tape on your lids, Jack put them there so everything would heal correctly,” Gabriel said letting go of my hand but I felt his calloused hands run softly against my cheek, pulling my lids while removing the tape. The action making me move my head, but I instantly regretting doing that.



The second Gabriel removed them, I was trying again to open my eyes but they felt heavy still, but I wanted to see him, so bad it was some sort of primal need, desperate and imperative. I couldn’t remember why though? Where was I specifically? And that desperation alone gave me strength to open them, but the image was blurry which was nothing like I was used too, too dull and doubled. The effort it was taking to do that – to see them wasn’t enough, but I had to close my eyes because it was making me nauseous. My stomach rolled, my mouth filled with saliva.



Aria? Avena?



I waited for a reply, it didn’t come but I wasn’t worried, I could feel them, just below the surface but I couldn’t hold onto the point keeping me up.



“Shhh… just rest love,” I heard from a far, “Ava sleep with momma.”

0 *~ * ~ * ~ * ~ * ~ * 0 *~ * ~ * ~ * ~ * ~ * 0

(November 27th 2014 – Three days and seven hours after the shooting)

Something, someone curled up against my right side, holding my stomach tightly. Listening, I heard five heartbeats, no other sounds around me but that and the beeping; inhaling, I caught different scents, chocolate, lavender, charcoal, sweet pea, cinnamon, mint and antiseptic. I know the owners of each scent – Jamie, Casey, Wolf, Ava and Gabriel – without opening my eyes.



Trying once more, I blinked a few times, squinting so the images would focus and clear.



“Hi,” Gabriel sighs heavily, relief on his face, he eyes me I realize, “are you awake now? Forreal?” his voice pained. What a strange question… I furrowed my brows. The bed I was on slowly folded to a sitting position, and I was able to see as well as scent each person in the room but I only wanted to see Gabriel. Ava second.



“How do you feel?” he questions, his voice pleading almost, but he ignores the confused expression I have on my face.



“Gooo-ud,” I fail to say ‘good,’ my mouth dry and my throat felt like it was burning uncomfortably. Wolf moved quickly, filling a cup and handing it to Gabriel when he growled at him, “Thirsty?”



“Yash,” I sighed, my jaw felt odd, too tightly wound, the muscles behaving as though I’d never used them before now. Sipping on the straw Gabriel held for me, was trying, I felt winded and that first painful sip, I took two more before pushing the straw in the cup away from my mouth.



“Better?” he asked his voice the same, waiting, desperate even for me to give him something to get for me, do for me to make him useful. He had wild eyes, searching mine. I searched my thoughts when I looked around and saw that besides Ava everyone else was wearing the same weary grimace as Gabriel.



Back on Gabriel, he put the cup down to the side, taking my hand between his, “What – what do you remember last Chelsea?” his eyes were sad, why were the sad? We had just… I closed my eyes trying to sort my thoughts but the headache I was sporting was unbelievable since I didn’t get them…starting from my most recent clear memory. “Dance with Jamie… uhm… we came home and you prepared – you and I we…” I looked at him hoping I hadn’t just dreamt us being together intimately.



“We were,” those two words made my heart race, in the moment, he alone existed, a throat cleared and so I continued after shooting the throat clearer a glare. “Kayla – Rainy’s little girl – she figured-” Gabriel stiffened for a reason but when I stopped he just shook his head, “she figured out what all the names meant?” Gabriel nodded. “Then we – we went away, we found Nora?”



Hmm okay, I woke up… “I went to class with Jamie – right?” I turned to Jamie too quickly and had to close my eyes and concentrate on breathing before I vomit. His face was paler than normal, “Yes,” no smiles or much of anything really on his face. Leaning my head back carefully, I concentrated, remembering the dance class, Madeline falling to the ground. Then I remembered and my body shivers, although I heating up as well.



“We were at our pole fitness class… s – so – so many – glass everywhere – shots,” I lifted my hand shakily to my neck, I was shot there, it’s the last thing I remember. My vision blurs and I can’t see Gabriel any clearer. Blinking furiously, he’s already perched himself on the side of my bed, making me face him, “You’re safe sweetheart,” he repeated the words soft, calming me, his voice a balm for my anxious nerves. Nodding furiously, more details hit me more unexpectedly.



“Angel?” I asked in a panic, “She seemed frozen, trapped, I tackled her right?” I looked to Jamie once again because my memories were rough, he nodded and tears of confusion leaked from my eyes without my permission. Images. Flashes. Bright lights in the ceiling of the studio. Music was calm but powerful; there weren’t lots of noise, silencer maybe? But the screaming was loud, so loud, glass – the mirrors breaking, bullets hitting the poles and ricocheting.



“The ceiling fell on my body?” I say more to myself more than anything but Jamie shakes his head anyways. Not the ceiling, a body? My head was on Angel. I hadn’t closed my eyes. Nona. Nona was there. One the floor. Blood.



She was there, I could remember. But gone. Empty blank eyes. Even with the body on top me, it didn’t hurt though, and black took over quickly.



I turned to Gabriel, fat tears dripping down my face, “Nona?” I whisper the sadness reflected back in Gabriel’s eyes tells me all I need to know. That breaks me.



“Take Ava Casey…” Gabriel ordered and when she’s no longer on my other side he pulls me to him on the bed and the whole room clears. My sadness soaks his shirt as I hold onto him tightly, needing him near me, to be there. And just like before, I know and can feel his need for this too.



“We don’t talk for a while, just with each other, until Gabriel breaks the silence again, “Nona wasn’t the only one,” he says and I wish he hadn’t. Who else? Angel? No she was fine. Jamie too… “Violet?”



I feel him shake his head, “Dana?” my voice muffled, shaky still, but I cannot help it, nothing should’ve happened to any of us, but someone else was hurt. Why? Because we were too close to the cluster-fuck the Elders created?



“McKenna…” my heart twinges, pains, slams against my chest, my lungs were being squeezed painfully. I pulled away to search his face, maybe he’s wrong or – or maybe he’s confused. I was confused… maybe that was affecting him over our bond? That could happen… I cry. “Nona and McKenna weren’t – they weren’t even supposed to be there Gabriel,” I said horrified, whimpering, blank eyes come to mind when I close my eyes so I try to keep them open instead. I take the comfort and offer it back to Gabriel all at the same time.



Chelsea… he asked me over the link.



Yea?



Did you go anywhere while you were resetting? Or resting? The hope in those words confused the ever-living hell out of me, but I try to think back and I had no memory of anything else come up. I didn’t dream of mother nor Jason. And as much as much as I wanted to tell Gabriel that I did, I can’t no, why? It should have been apparent but I missed it, still getting my bearings.



I thought maybe Nona – maybe she’s in the Hereafter… maybe you knew she was there… Then I understood. Why he said I was his main concern… he hoped I would be able to eventually bring his Nona back.



“I’m so sorry Gabriel…” the apology was weak even to my own heart and ears, but I really didn’t know what else to say to him. Then again, as fast as Gabriel got into the bed maybe just being here was helping.



“It’s okay sweetheart,” he said the words but, they were empty as mine, he wasn’t mad though, but that tiny bit of hope was gone now. Gabriel, I didn’t go there, but she may still be in the Hereafter. When he doesn’t answer, just hold me tighter, I change tracks, “How long have I been out?”



“Just over three days total…” his voice raspy and catching, my body stiffened, “Really?” I had never taken that long before, more than 72 hours?



“Jack theorized that it was all the different injuries especially the head wound, you need your brain to tell the rest of your body what to do, so that had to heal first. Jamie was hurt as well, so he wasn’t giving you much energy, he was eating like a pig, even went to just stand outside in the sun for a while. You woke up after 64ish hours, but you weren’t there yet, completely incoherent,” I just nodded, not remembering waking up the first time.



“Do you know who did this?” he tensed right then, “Who?”



“Pablo Santos, Dylan Ortiz and Julio Perez,” he growled their names but I didn’t know who they were. “The Elders made them?” I asked aloud but Gabriel chuckled humorlessly.



“Oh no… Amara and Francesca hired them.”



“Amara?” Now I know I heard wrong, “Amara? The human?”



Before he could answer my questions, I was already asking, “Was Darren involved?”



“Why would you think he was?” his voice hard and cold, my body shuddered, my heart machine beeped faster. He chuckled but was waiting for an answer.



“Dana said that he was different now with Cody and everything, that’s what I was thinking about the whole time. Wondering how to handle it,” I replied and Gabriel didn’t response verbally. At first.



“You want to rest?” he asked when I didn’t speak, just inhaling his scent, but the concern in his voice didn’t shift, it was still thick. Pulling away, I twisted my body, his eyes bore into mine. I leaned in closer, needing to feel his lips on mine, lowering my lips, molding them to his, slowly moving my stiff arms, my hands to his face. Feeling his lips shakily against mine, whodunit and sleep weren’t important right now because Gabriel thought he lost me. Whatever state I was in, he witnessed me in, which based on how I felt I knew wasn’t good; he had that image with him forever now.



As the kiss deepened, the tension in his body slowly dissipated, it wasn’t wild and rushed, Gabriel kissed me back with care and tenderly; his lips masterful, in control until I couldn’t breath, my lungs and maybe ribs still healing from fracture. Resting my head against his when moisture, his tears slid down my thumb, “I love you,” I said hoping the words that many take for granted would soothe him, ease his pain of this event. Over time, I thought to myself.



He nodded, swallowing trying to keep his composure, and I wasn’t hurt that he didn’t say the words back, because I could see it in his eyes. “I knew I’d get you back, but,” he shook his head, opening his eyes, keeping them on me, “it still hurt like hell,” his eyes glossy, gazing troubled into mine.



I finally take a look at his physical state… he’s usual conservative and polished look was gone, shirt rolled to his elbows, pants creased in the wrong places, his face sunken – I didn’t know what I look like but – Gabriel looked like death himself. I spot blood on the rumpled up shirt; my eyes fly to his silently asking, if it was mine? The sadness reflected answered me loud and clear. Louder than words.



I pulled him to me kissing him, sharing my love, taking his. I gather what little energy I had, pulling away, placing soft kisses against his jaw line, down his neck, over his pulse, until I’m right over my mark. I reveal in the groan that he releases his hands that grip me tightly, hold me closer, as he growls, moans into my hair.



“Chelsea…” my name panted, whispered with love and want, when I made quick work of his zipper and button, reaching into the tight space, taking him into my hand, his groans spurring me on, “please… so close,” I struggle forcing my wolf forward, fangs elongate, piercing his skin, listening to his breathing change, quicken, a moan released deep inside his chest, and my hands covered in his release, “Mine,” I whispered as Gabriel panted next to me, “Mio – per – sempre amore.” My eyes closed I felt my hands being wiped and Gabriel eased away but I was closer to sleep.

.

.

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Pat Lawson POV (November 19th 2014)

Sometimes things have a way of kicking you when you’re down. Today I was going to learn was that day.



“Mr. Lawson…” Dr. Wagner stopped me after Oakley’s session, before heading to speak with Sarah, Amelia and Ben in her office, “I mean no disrespect towards you but I’m not sue what you want your relationship with Oakley to reflect when she leaves here, but I’ll tell you what you’re heading towards,” her eyes wide and serious.



“A repeat of this incident which from what I’ve just learned of your daughter won’t end in her version of failure,” Exactly what Grant had told me.



“The second outcome you lose her anyways, because I’ve seen Oakley’s test scores, read what teachers have said about her and listened to what she’s saying. I have no doubt that your very intelligent daughter could and will be accepted into any university of her choice, with various scholarships. Take my word for it, you want to fix this chaos before then, if not,” Wagner just shrugged halfheartedly and uncharacteristically of what I was expecting from a therapist, as we stood outside her office.



“She’ll leave and cut me out… that’s what you’re saying,” I murmured, watching the backs of Sarah, Ben and Amelia’s head in her office, waiting.



“Yes, I’m afraid so… this wasn’t a cry for attention, Oakley isn’t trying to break up your family, she just wants out.”



And just when I thought I could forget that Grant didn’t hold his tongue, “Pat, she has valid reasons of what is wrong, stop trying to railroad her into bonding with Sarah. You’ve already made that mistake ma, one minute. That was the – that-” he can’t even finish. But it still has its chosen effect on me, images unwanted of how we found her infiltrate my forethought, wrecking me inside.



I hold one palm up, “I’m just not used to Oakley being this way…” I say but not to be judgmental.



“This way?”



“Talking… saying how she feels…”



Wagner pursed her lips glancing at Grant who was gazing at me with an unreadable expression, “I have a feeling she’s always spoke her mind, but you weren’t listening…”



Ashamed, I bob my head, “It’s good that she’s talking Mr. Lawson, but try your best to remain calm, non-judgmental or overly critical of what she’s saying. I asked her to come up with ideas about the short term. Realistic changes she can make. Now, it’s up to you to take what she’s told you and adjust your expectations,” I nod tapping, toeing the floor.



“Oakley has no interest in Sarah or Amelia, but she isn’t asking you to pick. She doesn’t want to live with them or interact with Sarah’s family. She’s not interested in forming any sort of bond whether it is motherly or friendship based. My advice? Stop shoving it down her throat, all that’s doing is creating more tension, fueling her anger and other destructive emotions. You’re forcing her to stay in the chaos to try something that is obviously not working for her. Please tell me if I’m wrong, but what do you think could be solved by her remaining in your home? To the same environment that brought her here?” she holds one finger up indicating she isn’t finished.



“If there were no other options, we would go that route try to find a middle ground but even then, it would just make this road to healing disorderly. So how would you be handling it if she wanted to go to your home?”



She had me, Grant and Wagner; even Oakley knew things had already gone to a place where we couldn’t sweep it under the rug.



“I hear you. I just don’t see how I can make this work…” I admitted with shame.



“And that is fine, a first good step to admitting you need help, but support is being offered, and with that support not just Oakley but your whole family unit should get to sturdier ground… but you can’t expect quick results. It takes time; it can’t be rushed or forced. But when we go in there I have some questions, I’ll need to ask you and the family,” she pointed to her office opening the door, entering; Grant and I shuffling in behind her.



“Can I see Oakley?” Ben shot up from his chair as soon as we crossed the threshold.



“In a little bit son,” I said softly, and sighed when he deflated and threw himself back on the sofa displeased.



Wagner cleared her throat, glancing between Grant and I, “How about we start today off by you guys telling me something small? How you feel? How your day has been going? Anything that’s on your mind about anything?”



Still stuck in my head, when no one jumped to go first Grant went, “Well… I’m having a good day. Had a big breakfast,” he pats his flat stomach, “now I’m here. I’m worried about Oakley but would like her to know that I’m here to offer any support she needs, whether it’s sitting in silent company or a listening ear.”



“Those are two wonderful things to offer Grant,” Wagner smiled.



“How about you Mr. Lawson?” Wagner said putting me on the spot.



“It’s tough, I haven’t been there for Oakley the way I should… and now I’m regretting that deeply because she’s hurting because of decisions I’ve made. She’s been sad for a long time and now-” I pause trying to find the right honest words that were appropriate for even my youngest – Ben – to hear. “I want to help Oak, but first changes have to be made and a lot of the changes are going to be to myself, what I want isn’t necessarily what is best for Oakley and it’s not about me, it’s about supporting Oakley so that she gets to a better place. I’m worried about pushing her further a – away.” I finish feeling, nearly mortified at my words, but I look into Ben, Amelia’s and Sarah’s eyes, hating the worry I see there.



When I go back to Ben though, and really focus on him, his eyes. The anger I see there, his face a carbon copy of mine, I can see his emotions stewing. His temperament like my own. He’s near ready to explode. Wears his every emotion on his sleeve sometimes, and today it’s looking like he’s ready to wear anger.



Wagner nods before turning to the sofa, facing Sarah and the kids.



Sarah swallows, “There’s so much I’ve wanted to do and be for Oakley, but I know that I went about it the wrong way. I’d like to apologize because I do care for Oakley, for all three of my children,” Sarah says what she has always – for a while – said and all I can do is wince when for the first time the words, ‘three children,’ from her rubs me the wrong way. It never has before but after just listening to what Oakley had to say… I feel eyes on me and glance up at Grant, realizing he’s been watching this mini moment of mine right now. His blue eyes full of mirth, lips quirked into a knowing smirk. I want to punch that smug look right off his face, but Amelia’s comments catch both our attention.



“I’m worried that Dad’s going to send us away because Oakley’s his real daughter. Mom said that she didn’t do this for attention, but she’s always the center of attention. I mean she even did this on my birthday. There so much that she already gets that I don’t, she’s never really at the house, she gets to go to the private school all my friends go too even though she doesn’t have any friends there-” I see Grant and Wagner relax in their chair as the bomb that Grant and Marvin said would blow up one day – does.



Ben turns so he’s facing Amelia, interrupting her “Our mom pays for us to go to school, she left money for school. How is that Oakley or my fault?” he doesn’t wait for an answer.



“Plus Oakley’s smart and your school wasn’t hard enough for her, she even takes one class at the community college,” Ben states Oaks’ accomplishments proudly.



“Ben we don’t-” Wagner started to say but Amelia cuts her off answering Ben, “Oh God!” she rolls her eyes, “We all know just how smart Oakley is, mom says it all the time, brags to different people about Oakley’s good grades, oh Oakley won an award… but if she so smart why’d she do something so stupid?!” Amelia snapped.



“Amelia Lawson!” Both Sarah and I warn. Ben jumps to his skinny chicken legs; “Because she hates you and mom!” he shouts shaking.



“You came in and changed everything, and it hurt her feelings,” his voice shakes and I know it’s either because he’s angry and wants to cry or he’s hurting for his sister. I stand to pull him towards me – offer him some comfort as his little hands tremble at his sides – away from Amelia and Sarah’s stunned faces.



But when my hand touches him, her turns on me, his blue eyes hurt with the same hurt I just saw from Oakley.



“It’s your fault she hurt herself dad!” his blonde hair going every which way but his eyes are on mind, his head tilted up to watch all six feet two inches of me.



“Ben, what happened isn’t anyone’s fault,” Wagner says calmly not raising her voice but still able to remain firm. And for a moment I swear that I see his eyes change, darken to cobalt blue, when he spins to face her angrily.



“It is his fault! I went to her- I went to Oakley before he went to her room and I told her I’d bring a plate up for her, but he said that she should come downstairs so he went up there and brought her down. Then she said how she was really feeling and he sent her back up there when she didn’t even want to be there at all!” he shouted shaking. Furious.



“What was the point of making her come down if you were only going to just send her back up there?” and as a parent it’s like my son has grown three feet and I lost three and we are at the same level.



“She’s here because of you dad! And why won’t you let me see her? When is she coming home?” he asks his eyes boring into my own and I’m frozen to my spot. Thinking of his words. I did do that to her. I made her come down when she didn’t want too then sent her back.



Wagner clears her throat, “Okay lets just all calm down,” she nods, I sit but Ben just watches between us, suspiciously like he’s trying to solve some problem in his young mind.



“When is Oak coming home?” he asks once more, I flick my eyes to Grant and see the support there and handle this, “Ben sit down, and we’ll talk about that,” I say trying to keep things mellow again.



He sits stiffly, wiping his eyes with his sleeve, but more tears full to the brim, waiting, “Oakley – Oakley wants to go live with Uncle Grant when she is released from here-”



“Then I want to go with Uncle Grant too, I want to stay with my sister!” he declares.



“I’m your sister too,” Amelia whispered hurt and I could see the hurt in Sarah’s eyes too, but before I could say anything, that fire was back in Ben’s eyes.



“What’s my birth mom’s favorite color?”



“What did my mom smell like?”



“What did she like to bake on Mondays?”



“What song did she used to sing when Oakley was a baby?”



“What did her laugh sound like?”



“Why did she start calling Oakley Bumblebee?”



“Why did she paint my room like the trees?”



Oakley can remember all that? I flicked my eyes to Grant; horror in my eyes I’m sure, because to me it feels like his face reflects my racing heart. If Oakley could remember all those things… she knew what happened that night, but she just wasn’t talking, I thought but Ben continued.



“Why did she paint the living room the color it was before mom changed it?”



“Did she like winter or summer better?”



“Do you know any of those answers Amelia?” he asks her the fight gone from him now, as Sarah’s eyes fill with tears, Amelia shakes her head and looks away biting on her lip.



“I love you guys, but I need to go with Oakley, she needs me and I want too,” I don’t give an answer; I’m too taken a back that I didn’t know how he felt.



What else had I missed?

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So... Vote... Comment (IT realllyyy helps me improve my writing, I tend to know if I've made something too subtle etc)... Thoughts? Ben? Sarah? Oakley? how you guys feeling... Chelsea's up tooo!!! YA!! YA!! Do you have any theories on the clues I've dropped here? Anything let me know :)

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