Breathe Jenna.

Breathe.

The wedding was over. She had said her farewells to her parents and her sisters, been escorted up to the honeymoon suite on the arm of her husband, and now she was waiting for him to come back with their luggage.

Breathe Jenna.

Breathe.

Everything is going to be okay.

She tried to reassure herself as she paced up and down the hotel sitting room, waiting for her husband to appear, but the thought of being alone with him was making her more terrified by the second.

Breathe Jenna.

Breathe.

As she heard the hotel room opening, she felt her whole body tense, and the sound of the door closing, arrested her from where she stood frozen near the window. As he appeared in the doorway, his broad shoulders filling the frame, she felt herself begin to tremble. He stepped further into the room, closing the sitting room door behind him, and effectively cutting off all of her ties with the outside world. At least for tonight, she was alone.

With him.

He took a few more steps towards her, his shoes sinking into the soft carpet, and she gave a slight shudder as his eyes raked down her approvingly.

"You look beautiful MashaAllah." He said, the side of his mouth lifting in a smile, and she started slightly at the deep sound of his voice. It was the first time he had addressed her directly all night, and she swallowed, too nervous to even mumble a reply.

Breathe Jenna.

She winced as his eyes skimmed over her body again. She was wearing the most expensive dress she had ever owned in her life. It was a flowing white gown that trailed a good few feet behind her, and it had diamonds all over it. She shimmered when she walked, and she wouldn't have been surprised if they had been real diamonds. Her veil was made out of silk and flowed in puffy clouds down to her waist, and she wore a Hijab made out of pure white lace. If she thought the gown was too much, the whole wedding had been more extravagant than was necessary, and she knew it had to be all him. While her parents were not poor, they certainly didn't have enough to spend so much, especially with three other children.

It had been a beautiful wedding. Everyone she knew was there, everyone he knew was there, which meant there were easily a thousand people in attendance. It had taken four cars to take even half of the presents they had gotten home. The cake had been ten tiers high, with the most elaborate designs that must have cost a fortune alone. Dinner had been seven courses, and her hand was actually heavy from the weight of her wedding and engagement rings.

It had been the most magical perfect day.

A wedding day that girls could only dream of.

And it would have been nice for Jenna too if she hadn't been forced into marrying him.

He took another step towards her.

Breathe Jenna.

Breathe.

***

Hudayfah stood with his arms across his chest, staring at his wife.

His wife.

Wow.

Before a few days ago, he never saw himself as the married type. It's not that he had commitment issues or anything, he just enjoyed being free. He didn't relish the idea of being tied down, and never had. If he wanted to pick up and stay at one of his other houses on a whim, he wanted to be able to do so without having to discuss it with someone else. Also the fact that he never found someone he wanted to spend the rest of his life with probably added to his reluctance. Its not like he wanted to be with her now either. It was out of necessity that he had married her. She would have been dead right now if he hadn't, and he couldn't let that happen to an innocent person regardless if he had to sacrifice his own comfort.

As he now looked back at her, he gave a sigh. She was huddled near the window, clutching her arms tightly and rocking slightly back and forth, a terrified look on her face. He didn't want her to be scared of him. After all they were married and were likely going to stay married as long as her idiot brother was alive. He understood where her fear was coming from of course. She barely knew him, they had only met a handful of times when he had come over to drag Muhsin's butt out of trouble. She also had spent her whole life covering and being told that she had to stay away from the opposite gender, and then all of a sudden she was married, and would have to be exposed to him, in more ways than one.

He took half a step towards her, but when she winced, he hurriedly backtracked.

"Are you hungry?" he asked, mainly trying to find something to talk about since the silence had gone on long enough to make him feel uneasy.

"No."

"Are you sure? I can order some food from the restaurant downstairs?"

"I'm fine," she caught his eyes for a second before looking down at her hands, "thank you."

He stood above her, hesitating, and wondering where he should go from here. While he never thought he would get married, he also never imagined this is how his wedding night would be going even if he did. His brother's advice had been way off.

When he first proposed to Jenna he had felt a small thrill at the thought of being with her. She was beautiful, and the few times he had spoken with her he had realized how intellectual and funny she was. Perhaps he had had a small crush on her before. That was probably why, when the only solution that could be found was marrying her off to keep her safe he had been the one to volunteer. To say the others had been shocked was an understatement, but they didn't question him as time was of the essence, and they needed to get her out of her family home right away, for the security of all.

Obviously she hadn't felt the same towards him, for she looked like she was going to throw up.

He stood watching her for a few more seconds, and when she still wouldn't meet his gaze, he sighed.

"Look Jenna. I don't want you to be afraid. Nothing will happen tonight, or any night for that matter until you are ready. I want to make sure I can do everything in my power to make you feel at ease with me." He said softly, and when all she did was nod her head, he gave another sigh. "I know our relationship is not the most traditional, and I am sorry for that. But I am willing to wait however long it takes for you to be comfortable around me, and simply be content with getting to know you."

She eyed him suspiciously as if she distrusted his words, and he felt himself getting slightly annoyed.

"Despite the way we started out, and the monster you must think of me, I want you to be happy with me." He said almost pleadingly, and to his relief, she spoke.

"Thank you." She whispered, and when she said no more, he let his hands fall to his sides in defeat.

"Why don't you go change and get some rest. We leave early tomorrow. You can take the bathroom, I'll change in here." He said, and she nodded, taking her bag and leaving.

He watched her go, wondering how in the heck he was going to make this marriage work. It was one thing having to guard her and look out for her. He would have done it in a heartbeat, and he had served that very purpose before in the past. But the honest to God only solution to actually keeping her as safe as could be was to marry her, and with the rest of the world save for only a few people thinking that they had married for love, they had a really big charade ahead of them, and Hudayfah couldn't help but wonder if Jenna was up for the task.

The poor thing wasn't even clear on all the details, and perhaps it was better this way. From what Hudayfah had learned about her, it would be too scary and intense for her to know the truth to the extent he did, and though they had only been married for about five hours, he already felt a possessiveness taking root in his heart.

He would protect her.

***

Jenna hurriedly closed the bathroom door behind her, barely locking the door before collapsing on the ground in a fit of tears, not caring if the dress got dirty. Considering the giant fancy hotel they were in, and the wedding he had just provided her with, he could probably afford to buy her another one without even noticing the money was gone. She took a few deep breaths, trying to calm her beating heart. She was so nervous and scared that she was surprised she hadn't fainted yet.

She had been fine during the hairstyling, and the makeup, and getting dressed. She had been fine in the car on the way to the hall, yet the second her foot touched to tile floor, it took all of her strength not to run away screaming. Surprisingly, once she had walked into the room on her dad's arm, she had suddenly become calm, and remained so all through the vows, the signing of the papers, the pictures, dinner, the cake, and the goodbyes. But the second she got into his car, and he closed the door behind her, and she watched her parents and siblings and friends waving goodbye, the tears began to gather in her eyes, and by the time he had entered the car himself, she had tears pouring onto her cheeks. The pit in her stomach and the tightness in her chest had only gotten worse as they began to get closer to the hotel, until she was shaking in her seat.

He had tried to make small talk ever since they left, smiling at her reassuringly, and even reaching out to give her hand a squeeze. Yet after she could only give him one word answers, he stopped trying, and they sat in silence the rest of the way. Now, as she stared up at herself in the mirror, shaking slightly, she was grateful that he had told her he would wait. Her mom had had a talk with her the night before, and just remembering what she had told her, and the advice she had given made her want to throw up. With the state she was in now, she wouldn't have gotten through this night if he had made her do anything. He had touched her arm to help her out of the car when they had arrived at the hotel, and that small gesture in itself had almost been her undoing. Anything else would probably kill her. He could have requested they do something, actually she had expected him to. She had painted such a villain of him in her head, that his softness and gentleness had surprised her. It made it harder for her to hate him.

But not impossible.

She took a few more deep cleansing breaths, before getting up, and as she opened her suitcase, she winced slightly. Her mother had gifted her a white gown to wear on her wedding night, and though it was modest, Jenna was terribly shy about these things, it still showed more than she would have liked.

"Okay Jenna don't panic. He already said you don't have to do anything. He isn't that bad." She muttered to herself, and once she had taken off her scarf and the veil, she cleaned her make up off, enjoying how refreshing the cool water felt against her hot skin. As she reached around to unzip her wedding dress, she suddenly realized that she couldn't reach the zipper, and she began to freak out even more. What was she supposed to do!?

She couldn't ask him to unzip it for her!

No!

She fumbled for her phone that was in the side of her bag, and once she had turned on the faucet to drown out the sound of her voice, she hurried to dial her mom's number. After the first ring her mom answered.

"Jenna habibti what's wrong!?" she asked her voice expressing how concerned she was. At the sound of her mother's voice, Jenna almost lost it.

Her mom.

Her sweet trusting loving mom. The only ones who knew the real reason why she had to marry Hudayfah was her dad and Muhsin. Even Jenna wasn't too clear on the details. Basically there were some bad people watching her family, and they would not hesitate to use Jenna to hurt them. The only way they would all be safe was if she married her husband. So she had agreed. Her family was everything to her, and she would sacrifice her happiness in a second if it meant keeping them safe.

So that meant they had had to play the perfect couple in love to everyone else. She had smiled and blushed prettily when he was around. He gave just the right amount of compliments and gifts. On her actual wedding, no one thought it too strange that she wasn't that happy. They just naturally assumed that she was sad to be leaving her family, and they couldn't have been more right. To everyone else, it was the perfect fairytale ending.

To Jenna, it was signing her death sentence.

"Mommy..." she began before bursting into sobs. She sunk down onto the toilet, all of the fears she had been holding in all day, finally coming out. It was a good thing she had taken off her makeup, otherwise she would look like a raccoon.

"Oh habibti." her mom said, and she fell silent, just listening to Jenna sob into the phone. Finally after she had calmed down a bit, through her sniffling, she heard her mom speak again. "Jenna what's wrong?" she asked.

"I'm scared." She whispered, close to sobbing again.

"I know baby. But it won't be that bad. I know It's scary taking this first step, and it will be scary the first few times, but it will get better. Hudayfah loves you and he would never do anything to hurt you. He would never make you do something you aren't ready for."

Jenna felt her heart sink.

Hudayfah loves you.

Oh but he didn't.

But she had to play the part. Her mom could never suspect she was unhappy...

"I know. He already told me he would wait however long it takes until I'm ready."

"See habibti. It will all be okay."

"I know mom. But I'm still scared." she said placing a hand over her face.

"I know habibti. I know. Just breathe and know that everything will be okay. Eventually this will become something you will look forward to doing!"

"Mom!" she protested, and she could feel her face heating up.

"Well it's true!" her mom said with a laugh.

"Mom there is another problem."

"What habibti?"

"I can't unzip my dress."

"Oh Jenna! Go ask Hudayfah to do it for you!" she exclaimed her voice colored with amusement.

"I don't want to......Mommy come do it for me!" Jenna whined and her mom laughed.

"Now you are just being silly. Yallah habibti turn off your phone, go ask your husband to help you with your zipper, and relax and have a good time on your honeymoon! Make sure and call me when you land."

"Okay. Bye Mommy."

"Bye habibti." She said and Jenna hung up the phone. She stayed sitting for a few more seconds, hyperventilating slightly, before standing up, and opening the bathroom door.

"Hudayfah?"