I headed straight to the Common Cabin, bag and all, after murmuring a thanks to Anya.

I was hoping she wouldn't follow me, but luck was not my friend today. She stood beside me with a smirk—that probably didn't mean well for me—on her face. I ignored her and stepped into the Common Cabin as soon as the elevator door slid open.

And the first thing I saw was a crowd.

A large crowd that stood in a circle, trying to look over one another.

And I could see a tall dark head in the midst. A head I could recognise anywhere.

What was happening?

I pushed my way through the crowd—not that I had to try hard, because the C'Riel practically cringed away from me—and came to stand in the very front.

Almost as if my anger reached him as soon as I saw him, he froze, his fist pausing mid-air.

His eyes snapped up to look at me, over the head of the human (because he was too short to be a C'Riel) he had in his clutches.

His eyes were dark.

Angry.

I could barely recognise him.

He looked emotionless.

I looked from him to the human in front of him and slightly shook my head. I started to turn away when I heard the distinctive sound of skin meeting skin, followed by gasps all around me—C'Riel and human alike—and I froze.

I whipped back around and saw that Rafe had taken a hit. His head was turned to the side from the impact and he made no move to block the next punch that went straight to his mouth.

Then he met my eyes.

In that moment, I knew. He'd taken that hit for me. To stop me from leaving. I also knew something else. From the anger that boiled in me that someone had punched him, I knew...I had feelings for this man.

This glorious alien.

I had feelings for him.

I felt a burden lift off me at that revelation to myself.

When the human cocked his hand back again to throw a punch, I quickly stepped forward.

"If you throw that punch, my knee is going to say hi to your little special place." I said as I came to stand right in front of Rafe, facing the human who had raised his fist at him.

I met the man's glare as he straightened. He came a few inches taller than me, but I didn't care, I would keep my promise if he threw another punch.

"Keep your man under your control," he spat.

I bristled, but didn't let it show.

"Keep your tongue under control. Know where you stand and who you stand against." I warned.

For the first time, indecision flickered in the man's eyes as he looked behind me.

"You were able to throw that punch because he let you. And now you're going to walk away, before I don't let you." I said, my eyes narrowed.

His eyes snapped back to mine and he glowered. He opened his mouth to say something—probably something derogatory from the look on his face—when the large mountain of heat and anger that stood behind me spoke.

"If I were you, I would be very careful of what I say next."

The voice skated over my spine and settled into my bones, sending heat spreading all over my body, all the way to my toes. I had to clench my fists to keep from shivering.

Some of the man's friends (I presume) stepped up to him and muttered soft words and started to drag him away.

"He started it! I didn't even—" he was quickly quietened by his friends who shot us panicked glances and pulled him away.

I looked at the crowd around us and waited for four seconds before saying, "Yes. The show is over. If you'll could all..." I made a twirly motion with my index indicating they turn and leave.

The people around me blinked and slowly turned to leave, leaning close and murmuring something, their eyes shifting from me to Rafe and back.

I shut my eyes and took in a deep breath and let it out. I imagined all my feelings lift away from me.

I felt heat swamp my back as he stepped closer, his breath fanning the hair at my temple.

The feelings that I had imagined leaving me, snapped back down on me, saddling me, pulling me down.

I opened my eyes. This wasn't helping.

I stayed exactly where I was, letting my breath come and go as quietly as they could. If I lost control of it, I might lose control of myself. And the Lord knows what'll happen after that.

He walked around, coming to stand in front of me. I lifted my eyes to meet his. He had a cut near his eyebrow and one on his lip. A distinctive mark of a ring could be seen. I gritted my teeth.

The asshole had hit him with a ring on his finger.

"You look happy," Rafe said.

I didn't even have it in me to be surprised at his almost mild tone.

"You're bloody." I said flatly, ignoring his previous statement.

He leaned forward, his lips to my ears and murmured, "So clean me up."

Now I was definitely surprised. My heart sped and goosebumps raised along my hands. My lashes lifted and I considered him.

What game are you playing? I wanted to ask.

His gaze shifted between the both of mine and he lifted his hand, bringing it to my face. He caught hold of a strand of my hair and I knocked his hand away, glaring.

He just looked back at me and lifted his hand again. I knocked it away again.

Then he moved so fast that I couldn't track him, and caught hold of my chin.

"You do not get to push me away after pulling me so close."

The world closed in on me and I realised the lights were being dimmed. It was late. People were filing out into the elevators, tossing us wary but curious glances as they passed us.

I glared up at him, catching hold of his wrist and tugging on it, "I have the right to be mad."

"I am not talking about you bring angry with me." He said to me, his voice low.

A throat cleared near us and we turned to look at Anya. She smiled sweetly at us and held up a box in Rafe's direction.

I pulled my chin out of his hold, wrapping my arms around myself and looked away.

I saw Wolf and Freesia waiting at the far corner. I smiled weakly at them and they started towards me.

I dropped my hands and walked into their embrace.

"Is he troubling you?" Wolf whispered in my ear.

I just shook my head as Freesia rubbed my back soothingly.

They finally let me go and I turned to see Anya nursing Rafe's wounds. He was looking down at her as she murmured something up at him.

I snorted softly and his eyes shifted to meet mine. He narrowed his eyes at me and I did the same back at him.

His lips twitched in amusement at that and I glared.

Anya stopped what she was doing when she realised that she no longer had his attention.

She looked at me and back at Rafe.

"Let's go, Amour. It's not worth it." Freesia murmured, pulling on my arm.

"Did you break his hand?" I asked Rafe, my voice not loud but not soft either.

When Anya reached a hand out to rub something against Rafe's forehead with her fingers, he moved back.

All of us froze.

Anya reached forward again, a little tentatively this time.

Rafe took a whole step back.

I took a sharp breath in.

He'd just denied her contact.

My heart soured, even as I tried to think past the very selfish emotion.

Anya started to say something and Rafe cut his gaze to her. He said something to her and she stiffened, her spine straightening.

She walked to me, placed whatever solvent it was she was trying to spread across Rafe's skin in my hand and stalked away, her head lifted high and her hips swaying.

But we all knew her ego was bruised.

My two friends were having a minute disagreement behind me and I felt their steps retreat and the sound of elevators followed.

They'd left. To give us some privacy.

We were alone.

I looked down at the small bottle that had the solvent and up at Rafe.

He waited.

He didn't have a single fleck of doubt in his eyes that wondered if I would come to him.

I shouldn't have stepped towards him.

But the way he looked at me...

His dark dark eyes boring into me with the kind of heat that I'd never seen him let himself express before.

It was the magnet of his gaze that drew me forth, as if I were nothing more than an iron filing.

My heart pushed at my chest, trying to break free of its confines.

I closed the distance between us and looked up at him.

He answered the question I didn't ask.

"I want you to clean me up." He said.

I let out a slow breath and looked down at my hands. Squeezing some of the solvent onto the tips of my fingers, I looked at the translucent solution for a few seconds before looking up at him.

I lifted my hand, slowly. Unsure. Tentative.

He leaned his head lower, letting my finger graze the wound near his eyebrow. I swallowed as shots of pure heat spread up my fingers and it was like a drug straight to my brain.

My lips parted slightly, my breath rushing out softly. I kept my eyes away from his, locked on my hand.

"Look at me," he murmured.

We were standing so close that if I wanted to, I could've counted the flecks of amber that had started appearing in his eyes.

I looked at him for a few seconds before looking back at my hand, seeing to it I spread the thick solvent evenly over the open wound.

He stepped closer, one of his hands going to the small of my back and his fingers spreading, pulling me forward, against every line of him.

I tossed him a glare and tried leaning back, but I could only arch my back, which pressed me further into him, so I stopped.

For the time being, I kept quiet. Squeezing some more solvent onto my fingers and very carefully spreading it on the wound on his lips. I tried to touch them as little as I could.

As soon as I finished, Rafe caught the arm I was dropping and pulled it over his shoulder, around his neck. He took the solvent container and tossed it aside and did the same with the other hand.

Then he leaned forward.

And that simply, he was hugging me.

My heart was beating way too fast. My breath rushed in and sped out. I could feel the blood in my body at my temples.

Our first hug.

I felt him take a deep breath and let it out. I squeezed my eyes closed and pulled my hands from where they were around his neck...

To circle them around his middle. I turned my head to the side so that I could rest my face against his chest, near his heart. It beat steadily under my ear. But fast, though nowhere near as fast as mine.

He pulled me impossibly closer, his fingers spreading against my back, one hand running up and down my back twice, as if soothing me.

In his arms, where the world looked smaller in comparison to him, I'd never felt more safe. I didn't feel the need to move.

But it was that feeling that reminded me I probably should.

I let out another breath and leaned back. He let me. Both of our hands dropped to our sides.

He still had blood on his face.

"You still have blood on your face." I said.

I didn't feel angry anymore. No more doubts. No more indecision. No more sorrow. I was with him, and now all I could see was him.

There was no space for me.

His broad shoulders, dark hair and burning gaze didn't let me think about anything else. I was caught up in the spell he so unconsciously weaved around me.

He caught my wrist, tugging me towards the elevator. I went quietly, knowing where he'd take me.

As soon as we got into the elevator, I asked him again.

"Did you break his hand?"

Rafe's eyes met mine and he stayed silent as if to say What do you think?

"Why?" I asked, tilting my head to the side, my hair falling over one shoulder.

The elevator doors slip open and he stepped out and I followed.

He ran his bracelet over his identity screen and the doors slid open to reveal his room. Just when I was about to ask again, he replied.

"I had some energy to burn."

My jaw dropped.

I caught his forearm and turned him around.

"'You had some energy to burn?'" I asked, sounding only mildly incredulous—which I thought was a great achievement given the shock I was experiencing.

He stared back at me impassively, then he looked towards the CG room.

"The first aid kit is in there," he said, tilting his head in the direction of the room.

I let go of his arm so that he could go get it, gaping after him.

I followed him and when I saw him getting the box out of a compartment, I looked around.

"Where's Ryx?" I asked.

Rafe turned around, "He's asleep. He hasn't been doing very good the past few days," he said.

I blinked, "Is he going to be-"

"He will be." Rafe assured me and started to walk past me.

"Sit here," I instructed and Rafe turned.

I pointed to the chair he had in the room. The last thing I wanted was for him to sit on the bed. Or the couch. With me leaning over him.

I shivered and if he noticed he didn't let on as he walked towards the chair and sat down.

He held up the box to me and I narrowed my eyes and walked up to him.

Then I realised what a bad idea this was, when he brought me to stand between his spread knees and he tilted his head up at me.

Close. Too close.

I took the box from him and opened it, taking out the material that he'd used last time to clean my wound. I placed the box behind him on the counter there.

I was about to take his face in my hands before I paused.

Maybe I should warn him first. Or ask.

"I'm going to have to touch you." I said.

"We have already touched," Rafe said.

Colour raised my cheeks when I thought of the last time we were here.

Okay, so maybe asking him to sit here was a terrible idea.

Almost as if he knew what I was thinking, his face lifted into a small smirk.

I ignored him and took his jaw into my left hand and with my right hand, gently cleaned the wound.

His eyes were locked on my face and somehow, being this close to him...

"Why did you hit Ace?" I asked, my voice coming out more gentle than I'd intended.

I felt muscles of Rafe's jaw harden under my fingers and I stilled.

"He ran his mouth," Rafe explained.

Relaxing when I realised his reaction wasn't because of me, I continued to wipe away stray specks of blood on his face.

"You've had an exciting week." I stated, twisting his head this way and that to see if I'd missed any blood.

"You are hardly the one to comment on that."

I met his eyes in surprise at the accusation in his tone.

"What is that supposed to mean?"

He stood up then and we were so close, I couldn't breathe.

He didn't say anything but I knew what he was talking about.

"Whatever you want to say, say it," I told him.

"Dancing with men is a favourite sport of yours?"

I winced at the dig. Then I thought about what I'd been thinking during the 'dance' with Tyler and let out a small laugh.

I shook my head at him, the truth of how I had actually felt setting me free from any guilt.

"He's just a kid," I said.

Rafe's eyes flashed and I stilled as he leaned towards me, his dark eyes boring into mine.

"Do not mock me." He warned.

A shiver of...something slid up my spine. And it didn't feel bad at all.

"Green is not a good colour on you, Rafe." I said.

He stared at me, his eyes narrowing.

"You are hardly the one to talk." He said.

I held up a finger, "Okay, first of all, Anya is an asshole. And second, I'm pretty sure she's out to get me."

Rafe tilted his head, "What makes you say that?"

I snorted, "Because of what she said when she came to pick me up."

Rafe went still then.

So still that I almost got a little scared. And Rafe had never scared me before.

"What did she say?" He asked, slowly.

"She actually didn't say anything. And it's what she didn't say that sounded scary." I said, thinking back to her words.

He caught my chin and pulled my face back to look at him.

"Did she say anything?"

The seriousness of his tone had me shaking my head, no, in reply.

He dropped his hand.

"I'm not okay that you hit people." I said.

He flicked a look at me, before looking away, "Tough."

He took the soiled material I had in my hand and went to dispose it.

I pulled out the sanitising liquid they had inside the box and cleaned my hands. Then I closed the box and handed it to Rafe, who deposited it in its rightful place.

He turned around and we looked at each other.

"Thank you," I said.

He tilted his head.

"For the earrings. I loved them."

"And yet, you do not wear them."

I smiled, then pulled my bag forward—from where it still hung over my shoulder—and pulled out the small box he'd given me. Placing Freesia's earrings into the box I pulled out the beautiful diamond snowflake earrings Rafe had gotten me.

"I wanted to put it on in front of you," I said as I put on the first one as Rafe tracked my movements, "I wanted you to know I wasn't choosing anyone over you."

He looked at me then, "Then why did you leave?"

I dropped my hands once they were both in place. They were light in my ear, but I felt their weight in my heart.

"I left because I was scared."

Rafe's brows raised, "Of me?" He asked.

I shook my head, no.

"I wasn't scared of you. I was scared you'd say it was all a mistake."

Rafe considered me for sometime. Then he stepped forward.

"And the boy?"

What boy?

Oh, Tyler.

"Like I said, he's just a kid. We were just having fun."

"Were we just having fun when we danced?" He asked.

I looked away and let out a laugh, rubbing my hands down my face.

"God, Rafe. How much more transparent should I be?" I asked.

Rafe tilted his head, "Answer me." He demanded.

I threw my hands in the air.

"No. We weren't just having fun." I said.

"Do not do this again, Amour. Do not run to someone else."

I opened my mouth to defend myself, but I closed it again, having nothing to say.

"If you have the courage to touch me, why did you not have the courage to face me?" He asked.

I couldn't meet his eyes. I looked away.

"I was feeling very..." I stopped myself, worrying my lip.

"Look at me when I am talking to you," he said, drawing my eyes back to him with a hold on my chin.

His words weren't harsh. They were soft but firm. And it drew me closer to the fire despite the warning of heat.

"What were you feeling?" He prompted.

He was doing it again. Making me reveal things he wouldn't.

I met his eyes, ignoring the urge to look away.

I tilted my chin up. The hell with this.

"For all the talk about courage, you should look at yourself," I said.

He raised an eyebrow.

"Getting me to tell you how I feel, while you stand safe behind your mask of indifference."

His expression shifted to reflect his shock.

"Indifference?" He asked, barking out a sardonic laugh.

"Do I seem indifferent to you? Giving in to all your whims and fancies, letting you do what you wish to me—"

"It wasn't like you didn't enjoy it," I muttered.

"Do not stand there and tell me I did not show you how I felt. While I was making you those earrings, you were halfway across the District."

He made them?!

My eyes clashed with his, mine reflecting shock and his, his rage.

"You made these?" I asked, surprised, my hand lifting to play with the snowflake.

He raised an eyebrow, "Did you think they lie around perfectly formed?"

I hit him with the back of my hand and met hard abs.

He caught my arm and pulled me closer.

"Now confess." He said, his eyes glaring into mine.

"You confess." I glared at him.

"I made you earrings." He said, as if that justified that I should confess first.

"And I came back for you." I justified.

Our eyes clashed like steel, searing into one another, fighting for the other to yield.

"You came back because Ace threatened you." the stalker said almost as an accusal.

"You accuse me one more time, I will not hesitate to strangle you. I decided that I should come much after his Com conversation with me."

"I will accuse you all I want."

"Kiss my confession good bye, then." I growled.

We glared at each other.

When both of our hearts steadied a little bit more, something else intensified. An awareness. It caught me by surprise because of its intensity. It dug it's claws into me, pulling me deeper, drowning me.

I was caught in his gaze and I swayed towards him. He stood strong, but his gaze betrayed his emotions.

He was just as hungry as I was.

"Confess." He said, his voice low, harsh. But the harshness betrayed the depth of his emotions. How much control he'd lost. And just how close he was to losing it all.

"I'm always at a disadvantage in this relationship. If I confess, it tips the scales further." I said.

"You have never been at the disadvantage in this relationship." He said.

I snorted, "That's not how I feel."

"How can you possibly feel you are at a disad–?"

"Because of this!" I practically burst out.

He still had one hand caught in his grasp, so I gestured with the other in his general direction.

"You expect everything from me and give me nothing. I'll give it my all and then if you decide it's not what you want you can walk away. And you do that so easily! I'm always the-" I inhaled, holding the words in.

"Finish it," he commanded.

"I'm always the vulnerable one." I said.

Rafe dropped my hand.

"If that were true, I would not bear your marks." He said, leaning his neck to the side and showed me a fading mark just below his jaw.

The one I'd left there.

I sucked a breath in at the sight of it. A rush of lips and murmurs flooded into my head at the memory of that night.

Unable to hold myself back, I leaned in, kissing the spot again. A soft breath left Rafe before his fingers caught in my hair and he tilted my head back, his lips dropping to my pulse and sucking the spot.

I jerked in his arms, submitting to the power he had over me. My fingers tangled in his hair and I tilted my head back further, letting it fall into his waiting hand, his other hand trapping me close to him, tucked into his heat.

When a soft sound left my lips, Rafe paused, lifting his head and looking at me. Silent words passing between us. I let my fingers trail down. His eyes closed when my hands landed on his chest.

"Hardly vulnerable." He told me.

I laughed softly, "I assure you," he opened his eyes and looked at me and I continued, "I am."

I know then, that I had basically just confessed. With my actions and my words, I had told him I would do anything if it were him. Have no barriers if it were him.

He understood. I could see from the look on his face. But I couldn't understand what the expression it was. It almost looks like he was—

"Jump," he murmured and I blinked.

When I did jump, he'd taken me in his arms, his right arm under my knees and his left behind my back.

I tilted my head back, letting my hair fall behind me.

"This is so cool," I said, lifting my hands to wrap around his neck.

His lips met my temple and I stilled, letting him kiss me there, a smile lifting my lips. Maybe I'd just imagined his not-so-happy expression.

He carried me as if I weighed nothing, walking us to his bed and laying me down.

"Sleep." He said, one knee still on the bed as he started to get off.

I sat up on my elbows.

"What about you?" I asked, my brows furrowing.

He smoothed his fingers between my brows before murmuring, "I have some work."

Work? It was past midnight.

Then he left his room.

Left me. Alone.

He would kiss me. He would take me into his arms. He would make me want to confess. But he wouldn't lay down next to me.

I laid back down, looking up at the top of the bed that curved in.

I waited for an hour.

And another.

He never came back.

I got up and left, feeling my heart pull at itself, tearing at the seams, coming apart. Breaking.

Why did we always take one step forward and three steps back?

When I got into the elevator, I stared up at the sides to see if there was a camera as there had been on the Hover. There was.

I glared at it. Letting my hurt, pain and anger show.

"You're an asshole, Rafe." I said.

He would see this. And when he does I hope he knows just how much I was never ever going to give in to him again. Because every time I did, he would stay interested as long as I revealed some vulnerability. Then he would do something that assured me how much he didn't give a shit. It was like he was offering me the crumbs off his table.

And I deserved better.

------------------------------------------------------------------

I really liked this song, and it's kinda how Amour feels. So Perfect Nightmare by Shontelle. Enjoy!