When my eyes snapped open, I tried to remember when I closed them. The only thing that came to my mind was pain and then blackness. Was I being drugged? Was I ill? What was happening?

I was determined to find out what was going on. I sat up, careful not to jostle Ryx, who was softly snoring beside me. I got up to search for the only person who could give me answers. Rafe.

He seemed to know I was awake, because he looked up from where he was sitting on the raised platform with his arms resting on his knees, his chest heaving. I stopped, realising he'd been...working out, for the lack of a better term. A thin layer of sweat coated his skin. He stood as I walked closer.

"What's happening to me?" I asked him straight to his face.

"I have been thinking about it," he said slowly, lifting his hand to rub his thumb along my cheek before dropping it immediately, "And I have a theory."

I raised an eyebrow, "Enlighten me." I said, when he didn't continue.

He nodded his head towards the sofa that was pressed against the wall, "You might want to sit down for this." he said.

I followed his instruction, crossing my legs and looking up at him expectantly.

He cleared his throat, coming to a stop before me, "It would seem that Humans are capable of surrendering too."

My eyes widened, "Are you saying-?"

"That you surrendered to me? Yes."

I blinked, "What? How?" I asked, "Neither are our brains as evolved as yours, nor do we have the mutated DNA that requires a mutually symbiotic relationship."

He pointed one finger at me, "Exactly. Which got me thinking, how can your brain possibly be displaying behaviour that your species has never exhibited before?" He said.

I prompted him on with my hands to go on.

"At first, it made no sense, because there seem to be two of you."

"Two of me?" I whispered.

Rafe held up a hand, "You need to keep calm no matter what I say. I think some kind of extreme emotion triggers the shift between the...both of you."

The shift? That's what we're calling it?

"You're saying..that every time I thought I've been falling asleep I haven't actually been falling asleep... but I've been turning into someone else?"

Rafe held up one hand, "You need to calm down." he said and kneeled before me. It wasn't helping. It wasn't helping at all. I could feel the pressure on my lungs that stopped me from taking in air.

"Will you let me control your heartbeat?" he asked me in a soft voice.

I gasped, my heart beating faster.

"Amour, you are becoming the opposite of calm." Rafe said with controller urgency.

I shut my eyes trying to take deep breaths, but it only became harder with each breath I tried to force in. Hands cupped my face and I snapped my eyes open and realised that he was breathing a little hard too.

"Will you let me help?" He asked, his voice a little strained, but I could have imagined it over the ringing that had started in my ears.

I nodded, my lungs squeezing. Rafe held my eyes and almost four seconds later, my lungs expanded, the fog in my head clearing and I took a deep breath in, relief spreading through my limbs.

I looked at him, my hands lifting on their own to catch hold of his, "Why didn't you come for me when I fell unconscious? My friends came for me, and you didn't." I accused.

"Who did you think sent them?" He asked.

"It doesn't change anything. You weren't-"

"I was unconscious too, Amour." Rafe sighed.

I blinked, "Wha..." I couldn't complete what I was going to say, staring at him in shock.

"Biofeedback, baby." He murmured, tapping his temple and pointing at me, "What happened to you, happened to me too. It was the first time and I didn't know how to fight it."

Oh.

"I learnt how to work around it by the second time you fainted," he said, smiling wryly.

I glared at him, then sighed. "Is that how you controlled my heart beat?" I asked, "Through biofeedback?"

He smiled, but didn't say anything. But before I could insist on an answer, he continued and I automatically quietened.

"It seemed as if you were two different people, because there was you," he nodded his head at me, "And you have memories of your own and you know what and who you are. And then there was...her."

When he paused, anxiety spread through me. He rubbed his thumb against my hand and somehow immediately everything settled inside me. I narrowed my eyes but him, but he didn't notice. He was too busy talking.

"I cannot seem to know what to call her, because she is you. She is just the you your brain seems to be-for the lack of a better word-protecting you from."

I raised my eyebrows, "She is..me?" I asked.

He held his hands up, palm facing me, "Let me explain." he said and came to sit beside me. I turned to the side, facing him, pulling my legs against my chest with my eyes trained on him.

"I am going to have to start from the very basics, so be patient with me." he said and after I nodded, he continued.

"When a C'Riel surrenders with another, they tend to organically synchronise the wavelengths of their brains to match."

I stared at him and he laughed, "I can actually think of a Human analogy that would make sense to you."

"Can you imagine tuning a radio to a particular station?" he asked and I almost stood up and clapped.

"That was a really good one." I told him, smiling proudly.

He just rolled his eyes at me, but I caught his small smile. A balloon of love inflated in me at that and he caught my eye with a mischievous grin, I schooled my expression and gestured that he continue.

Throwing me one last smirk, he continued, "Usually both partners modify their wavelengths to reach a point they could synchronise on." he paused, "For example, imagine two singers, one male and one female who are being made to sing a song together. But both of them sing on very different scales and one cannot reach the other's, so they try to find a key that they can both sing on."

I raised my eyebrows, "You're saying I did that? Except with my brain." I asked.

He shook his head, stretching his arm on the back of the sofa and leaning a little closer. Something curled inside me in contentment at his closeness.

"I think that it took me awhile to surrender to you because you brain was not capable of finding the key that I was already...waiting for you on." he said.

I nodded, letting him know I was with him. But before he could start again, I burst out, "So how did you surrender?"

He smiled almost patiently at me, "It is possible that my brain for a very brief and painful period of time shifted it wavelength to match yours, locked onto it and wrenched it to the key that would suit us both."

I stared at him, remembering the painful feeling and darkening vision that had accompanied his surrendering to me, "You can do that?"

His brows furrowed, "Imagine the singers again, he can reach a higher octave for a few seconds. It is not impossible, just painful and very uncomfortable. And thus, unstable and it cannot be sustained."

I nodded slowly before asking, "Has this happened before?"

He threw me a wry smile, "We are the first Human and C'Riel ethrés in the world, so I do not really know the exact science of it yet."

I nodded, "Go on." I said, swallowing.

"Once I brought you down to the frequency that we match, I surrendered to you," He smiled, almost fondly, his eyes faraway, before they refocused on me sharp as lasers that could shred me but had only ever gently caressed me.

He stopped here and rubbed his other hand through his hair, ruffling the perfectly dark silky strands.

"I think this...situation we are in is because of me." he said, frustration lining his words with roughness.

I sighed, then sidled up closer to him, rubbing my lips affectionately against his jaw.

"Tell me," I said.

He closed his eyes, leaning into my gesture, before he continued.

"Every part of my brain that is active has been bombarding yours with feedback." he said.

I looked at him, understanding slowly creeping in, "And you've told me that our brain is not as evolved as yours...which means-"

"The parts of your brain that have been dormant have been rendered active because of the constant stimulation from all the electric impulses my brain has been sending." he said, then before I could let out a sound, he continued, "And often these parts of your brain, previously dormant, started acting up when there was some considerate distance between us, possibly because my brain was sending stronger signals in order to compensate for the distance."

"So...what you're saying is...essentially, my brain is like yours now?" I asked.

He chuckled, "No, Amour." then, he frowned, "Not yet anyway."

"Not yet? Meaning it could happen in the future?" I asked, raising my eyebrows, a smug smile lifting my lips.

He narrowed his eyes at me, "You are taking this quite well." he stated.

I tossed him a grin then nodded at him, "What does this have to do with..." I waved my hand, "Everything that's happening with me?" I asked.

He let out a breath, "It is possible that when this happened, your brain-unused to all the stimulus overload that occurred every time the previously dormant parts of your brain became active-divided itself into two to protect your psyche."

He stopped talking, a beat of tensed silence filling the spaces between us.

"To protect my psyche?" I whispered after a few more seconds.

Rafe leaned a little closer, the arm that was resting behind me, shifting closer to cup my shoulder. His thumb rubbed soft circles there and distracted me and centred me at the same time.

"The first time that the previously dormant parts of your brain became active, you got scared and had an anxiety attack and could not handle the sensory stimulation. It is possible your brain is attempting to smoothen the transition between the part of you, that has formed because of me, and the real you, by splitting your consciousness and hiding the other side of you until you are strong enough to handle it."

My brows furrowed, "But now there's two of me," I whispered. My eyes were trained to my fingers that were twisting together.

Rafe cupped my face with his other hand and lifted it so that I looked up at him. His gaze was a little dark but all concerned.

"Yes, there is two of you." He said, "But at the same time, there is not."

I stared at him. "Are you going to continue or keep the suspense simmering."

He seemed to think about it and I slapped the back of my hand against his very naked abs. He laughed and looked at me, his eyes heated. I pressed my hand to his eyes, blocking their view of me and vice versa. Those eyes had devastating results to my heart.

"Talk." I demanded. He tugged my hand off, pressed a kiss to my knuckles and pulling me right to him until I was pressed to his chest, his skin sending off waves of heat that had me shivering at contact.

"While your brain planned to keep the other side of you hidden, it would seem that the other side of you is too strong to keep chained. And so, whenever you feel even a little threatened or feel like your going to experience an overload, the part of you that is structurally stronger and stabler takes over." he said, "But when your consciousness was split, it split into a part of you that was Human and the another part of you that is not...Human-like, it has seemed to latch onto and imitate that which is closest to it and that which it finds familiar."

My eyes widened, "You?" I whispered in shock.

A slow smile spread his face, "Me. Your brain has imitated mine to a perfection."

I raised my eyebrows, "Do I speak like you? When I'm..not-me-but-still-me?"

He laughed, "Not exactly. But you do seem to have all my memories and because my brain says that I am C'Riel, you seem to think you are C'Riel as well."

I shut my eyes, rubbing my forehead, leaning my head against his stretched arm.

"What can we do about this?" I asked, sighing, "Will I end up having two sides? One that thinks it's me and one that thinks it's you?"

"No, if I am not wrong, it is a temporary manifestation of your brain's need to find a stable identity. Because it is not privy to your memories, it took up mine. I think once you are ready, the transition will happen on its own and you will have a complete and single personality." Rafe mused. I looked at him, my brows furrowed.

"You're sure?" I asked, still unsettled about the whole thing.

He threw me a brilliant smile, "Almost completely."

I sighed, I guess I was just going to have to wait this out.

"And until then?" I asked, resigned.

"Until then, you are going to have to be very watchful of your emotions and keep them in check. Not that her coming out is an issue, but it seems that while she retains memories of what happens while you are awake, you do not seem to possess the ability to do the same. And that can be distressing."

I pressed my lips together, then nodded. He was right. It was disconcerting to me that I retained no memory of the time that...she was awake. Or rather, I was awake.

"So what puts her to sleep?" I asked, after a few seconds.

"It would seem that any talk about her being Human shuts her down because she seems to experience denial about the matter, because she has memories that say she is C'Riel. Imagine how you would feel if everything you knew to be true was not real anymore."

I threw him a dry look and raised an eyebrow. He just smirked, before standing up and holding his hand out. I took his hand and he pulled me closer, his amber and coal eyes twinkling with something that had drawn me in from the very first time I had set my eyes on him. A smile spread his lips, his lashes dropping as I lifted my hands to wrap them around his neck.

"You seem happy," I said, smiling.

He shrugged, "You surrendered to me. I have nothing to complain about, even if the part of you that surrendered to me is currently hibernating."

I pressed my lips together when he said the word complain, remembering something about someone who probably had lots to complain about.

"Rafe, I need you to-"

When the computer in Rafe's room alerted us of a visitor, I gritted my teeth.

"I need to talk to you, Rafe." I stressed, just as Rafe allowed entrance to the visitor, heading towards the entrance, his back to me.

I walked towards him, "This is really import-"

I stilled when I saw his hands fist by his side.

"What's wrong-?" I asked then stopped and gasped.

Kylie stood before us. Heavily pregnant. She looked about seven months along her pregnancy. And blood covered her hands. She was pale, sweat dotting her forehead, her suit stretched around the middle, her feet barely holding her up.

I caught her hands in mine, "What?" I asked, "How?"

It had been a day. A single day. How was she so heavily pregnant in a day?

"I coughed out blood." She whispered, but she wasn't talking to me, she was looking at Rafe. I didn't care right now.

I turned to look at him. His eyes met mine. This can't be good. We thought the same thing.

"Health Care Centre." he said, "Now."

This time, she didn't protest. We rushed her to the Health Care Centre, a few floors away from where we were. Rafe was shouting orders at soon as we entered. Orders that everyone fell all over themselves to obey.

I looked around for the C'Riel nurse that had come to Rafe's room yesterday. I went around the Centre looking for her. I even asked around, describing her the best I could, but everyone stared at me shaking their heads and said there was no one that they had seen that matched my description. I stalked to Rafe.

"Who did you bring yesterday?" I asked out in a rush, "No one here seems to know who she is."

Rafe glanced at me, before looking away, "She does not work here. She is a...friend."

My eyes narrowed and just as I was about to ask him what kind of 'friend' she was, Kylee hacked up some more blood. I rushed to her side, but was pushed aside by Dr. Stevens, who threw me a dark look that confused me. He sat by Kylee, checking her vitals with a swift efficiency that spoke about years of practice. I gritted my teeth and walked back to Rafe, who stood with crossed arms, a small frown on his face.

"What is happening? How is she pregnant?" I asked, exasperated.

Rafe threw me a wry grin, "You want to know how she got pregnant?" he asked.

I threw him a dark glare. "You said C'Riel do not get...they can't have...that it can't be done unless they surrender to their ethrés. And after what you said today, I know we're the first Human and C'Riel to surrender to each other."

Rafe paused, before answering, "Yes, I did say that."

"So what the hell is happening?" I asked, my voice had raised without my asking it to.

Rafe's dark glare met mine and I asked her again, "If they didn't surrender to one another, how is she pregnant, Rafe?"

His jaw locked.

"If you don't answer, I can only assume you lied to me. That you're lying to me right now."

His eyes flashed and he stepped right into my space, his fingers locking on my chin and lifting my face up to glare into my eyes. Just as he opened his mouth to say something, commotion at the entrance to the Health Care Centre had us whipping our heads to it, both of us on the edge.

A soldier rushed to our side, sweat beading his forehead and his chest heaving.

He spoke fast in his language and Rafe turned into rock in front of me.

"What?" I asked, annoyed. I shook Rafe and asked again. He gave instructions to the soldier in front to him, who nodded and took off in the direction he had come in.

"Answer me, dammit!"

"Ace escaped."

I stilled. How had he possibly escaped?

"Escaped or kidnapped?" I whispered.

"No signs of struggle. He walked out of there."

Rafe looked ready to break something.

"You should have let him out yourself." I said.

Rafe whipped his head at me, a flurry of fast harsh words slipping out of his lips in his language, before he addressed me in English.

"He tried to kill-"

"I know."

"I know you know. I saw your heartfelt conversation with him." Rafe spat.

I shook my head, I wasn't even surprised anymore. Of course, he saw it. He saw everything. He was everywhere.

"Sir," a familiar voice said and we turned to look at Dr. Stevens who was looking at Rafe, a grave expression on his face. Dread curled in my stomach, but Rafe's expression was blank.

"Sir, the baby is healthy. But.." his eyes flit to me and back.

"Just say it," I said, my voice flicking out like a whip. Unintended, but my nerves were stretched to the limit and I didn't have any patience left.

"But she is dying."

The world spun on itself, my vision darkening. This time when I fell, at least I knew I would wake up stronger. A different person. But I just wouldn't remember it.

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Apparently no A/N today. *sigh* *yawns*

Laters, guys.