A/N this is part of our 50K reads celebration special chapter. 50K - Really can you believe it. Plus we got to #2! Join the party!
Picture: Romantic image of Jenny in the mornings. Video in case you want to know what Jenny is singing in her fight with pixel.
Washington 2.0/Rockwood Hall/Room 404
Jenny's POV
Of all the things CalTech had done to prepare me for my actual career under our robot overlords the fact that I could sleep in for the morning was the only one I found useful. Who says higher education doesn't prepare you for real life? I was even prepared for life under robot rule.
For the next few days, my night time tended to begin with being chained to my bed then being dragged from my bed up into his bed in the middle of the night. Then he would literally sleep with me, except I didn't get to sleep with him. The first time he didn't thingy me I just lay there petrified in his arms. His every touch of my skin was electric and I was too freaked out by the whole affair to actually be able to sleep. If he rolled over I would get this mini light display as the LED's down his spine would blink on and off. It was like sleeping with Times square in my bed. I tried to use his long hair to cover up as much of the blinking as possible, but he would then move. All the tiny lights did was show up his perfect muscular back and broad shoulders or worse still highlight the complex tattoo he had on his left side and left arm.
It looked vaguely Celtic but up close was a tiny fractal pattern. He claimed it was cyborg writing. For the first two nights I had gone mad thinking the pattern had changed. I spent the entire next day wondering if I was 'sleeping' with the same guy or if he had an army of more progressively evil twins. It turns out the tattoo was made of the same kind of stuff you get in a black and white Kindle. So it could on a whim be recut. He had the pain of a block tattoo while the 'microbeads' but once in he could change them ( although apparently it hurt when he did). I asked him what the patterns meant or represented. He told me it was an A.I language but the writing was mostly his shopping list.To which I had said 'you had forgotten the carrots'.
Quite often #DEC would clamp my wrists to the bed above my head which would make sleeping impossible ( honestly you try it). At bedtime #6502 would hustle me into the clothes printer and I would come out in a night catsuit which if I was lucky had a back and if I was unlucky had a nearly bare back in case he wanted to 'thingy' me again. Frequently I would come out of the printer blind-folded, while you would think that would block out the light from the LEDs on his spine. It only blurred them but left me not knowing what as happening which made sleeping difficult. I spent the entire night not knowing what was going on around me just feeling him next to me touching.
Sometimes he would spoon me and hold hands. I felt like I was his huge breathing security blanket. Then feeling like I was surrounded by him, I might drift off until he moved. It took me a few days to realise he meant the whole 'no sex with pets' thing which kept me on edge in case it was some elaborate cyborg joke.
Then if I did somehow manage to go to sleep I would be woken up in the early near dawn hours by the bedroom slaves who bundled me into the clothes printer to be cleaned and re-dressed ready for him to wake up with in the morning. If he was using me as a flesh bolster then they had a portable makeup printer because god forbid he wakes up with the woman he's been sleeping with all night looking anything less than perfect. It's not like this stuff really came off. I'd been trying to rub it off onto the white sheets so I could write the words 'die you misogynistic scum' in it but this slave stuff didn't really come off. Plus he told me the robots put caffeine in the makeup to make it addictive which probably explained why, after I was left by the slaves, I was wide awake and really craving a double espresso macchiato.
Then he would wake up. Then he would kiss me and say things like 'morning pet' and if I didn't have a snappy come back it was always. "I hope this doesn't mean you're going soft on me" (Threat threat). So often I'm lying awake thinking 'hope an asteroid hits you master' ( no dull ), 'maybe today is the day you guys all die due to some minor disease your not immune to' (no repetition ).
Then he gets up and I have to play piano for him. After which my fingers and arms feel like I'm Miss Stretch Armstrong. He has his breakfast in bed ( which I notice I'm never invited to ). The slaves dress him and then he wants another kiss before he leaves. By this stage I'm generally tired and cranky so I refuse. So #DEC and #6052 or some passing robot twists my arm behind my back and holds me there while he kisses me. Why he can't just zap be into submission is beyond me. This arm-twisting and presenting me to master has now become part of the morning routine. As is my comment like 'I spent all night cutting the cables on the elevator please let me know if it works' as he leaves. After he goes #6502 times out into password protection silence and #DEC leaves with him. The result of all this I get a food ball.
So yes a rather long dull apology for the fact that at this point I'm in the room on my own with nothing to do all day until he comes back and so yes I do tend to have a bit of a morning nap. OK ? You try being a cyborg's pet. Worse still you wouldn't like the machine you get stuck into if you look like you have bags under your eyes either.
This morning over (his) breakfast he told me that a AI over in New York had discovered he had George Lucas enslaved and so had forced him (George) and a whole bunch of new and original actors to reshoot all of Starwars films except this time from R2D2's point of view. Every scene with R2D2 is exactly identical to the original Star Wars but you get to see the whole thing from the robot's side. Basically, R2D2 engineers everything - he finds the secret plans on the death star, he finds the princess, he stops the garbage disposal machine from crushing Luke, he fixes the X-wing fighter mid-flight, sacrifices himself to stop Luke from getting killed and even presses the button which drops the torpedoes while generously letting Luke thinking he did it. Plus they shot a whole bunch of new scenes like he's the one who persuades the young Yoda he can be a Jedi night in the first place. R2D2 is the rebel alliance. Not only that, George Lucas get's a whole gaggle of writers including a bunch of Nobel prize for literature winners (shades of Schindler's List here) to come up with some moving and eloquent translations for the beeping dialog they use the 'human' version of the film. So Rockwood asked if I want to go to the film premiere but I would have to watch the entire film kneeling at Rockwood's feet or possibly under Rockwood's feet like a foot rest. I'm like that's grossly humiliating, demeaning and degrading but hmm tempting. I'm not sure what would you do?
So I woke up again mid morning and rolled over to see pixel the Roomba cleaning the floor.
"Morning Pixel," I said.
Pixel stopped rotated clockwise and anticlockwise and then continued. I had always interpreted this as hello, but it might have been 'don't step on the wet patch' for all I know.
Pixel was a floor cleaning robot which came out to clean the floor mid-morning. It was small about the size of a dinner plate. The first morning I found it I experimented with bowing to it like was a master. I think it found it funny. Like #DEC It didn't say much. I discovered it could spin one way or another as a kind of yes or no. Sometimes I would play floor cleaning games with it. Generally it was as annoyed with my help but I noticed if I followed the complex patterns it did then it didn't mind. I kind of realise I was reduced to having my best friend as a Roomba which I tried not to think about.
"Pixel" I began "I just had the weirdest dream."
Pixel stopped cleaning for second turned round so it single eye looked at me, turned back and started cleaning again. If I was a real cyber Disney princess I would have broken into quite a good show tune at this point. Unfortunately, the robots had upgraded every other part of my body apart from my lousy singing voice. Honestly if I could have sung properly I might go for the whole slavery business. I mean they cured Joe's asthma is it my fault that not being able to sing hasn't got a medical diagnosis yet?
I had fallen asleep thinking about what a terrible ending it was to Star Wars Episode III: Revenge of the Sith wishing that Queen Amidala had lived after childbirth.
I start following Pixel round the room talking recounting my dream in vivid detail.
"I dreamt I was on this train in the future listening to a guy talk on the phone. The whole train was filled with people and robots. And I am standing there with my feet hurting listening to the guy on the phone. So the guy says 'sure I'll pick up a bottle of wine on the way home what's the celebration?' Then he pauses."Padmé Vada ? You mean Luke Vada's Mum ? Has that girl luke's twin sister what's her name eerr.... Leya Vader... yeah I know Padmé runs the local PTA.... Used to be a beauty queen or something right Queen Amidala?.... Oh real queen... of Naboo? Right. easy mistake to make right?.. Yeh I now Luke is little Jimmy's best friend so what? .... Dinner !!!! Are you ##### serious have you met the dad? ...... yeah Lord Vader the guy on TV.... Yeah I know he's high up in the government. ... yeah I know it could be good career move... but seriously have you met the guy? Do you know that when they fired him from his last job he went completely postal and destroyed his entire Jedi order. ... yeah that huge disused Temple lot thing near the Cineplex that was it.... Well word was he did that when he still had a new job offer... Well you want to have dinner with these people? Are you kidding..... It doesn't matter they've moved into the street.... No it's not just that I find his breathing machine irritating..... No I'm not being disabledist is that even a real word?....yes.. yes.. Have you heard the guy go on about politics ?... No *I* met him with some of the other dads when he went to Jimmy and Luke's football practice.... No, I don't know what he eats.... I don't even know how he eats... put it like this I very much doubt he's a vegetarian... he would make even Ronald Reagan look like a left-wing pinko liberal.... I'm not having dinner with them.... OK.. OK... Look can we have something like a no laser sword in the house rule or something... just make it up... say your dad died in a freak self-inflicted laser sword accident you don't want them in the house.... Light sabre then, you don't want him to be doing any light saver tricks in the house I can tell you ... no seriously it's dumb my idea hang on I'm loosing signal I'll call you later.LATER. L.A.T.E.R"
Pixel stops. looks at me. I swear is shakes it's head and starts cleaning again. Yeh, you know your a cybog's pet when you're being looked down on by sub-sentient cleaning apparatus.
"Hay look, let me help you clean," I say because I'm a) helpful and b) bored as a plank making factory.
Pixel double twists a 'no'.
"I promise I'll clean like you do," I say grabbing a cleaning cloth from the slave corridor. I put it down and start polishing the floor in the complex pattern pixel uses. Pixel runs over and tries to suck up the cleaning cloth I'm using.
"Let it go! Let it Go!" then use the only thing I know which works I start singing. Pixel runs away and I have the cloth. Pixel runs into the slave corridor with the door open to hide, hoping it will get #6502 to investigate. A cool draft came into the room.
"Turn away and slam the door." I sing "I don't care! what they're going to say. The cold never bothered me anyway!"
I stop suddenly when I get a lunch invitation with someone in the slave feeding area in 20 minutes.
"Brunch break yes" I shout. I so need a break it's been a busy morning.
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