A/N: Special Halloween cover for all those bad girls out there, keep your freak on.

We said we would send out a chapter today and we are creatures of our word. By the way, can we say what a dumb move this is? Read the book on Wattpad publishing and the tell you never to publish prematurely. Yeh, but to be honest we found this too hard to not press that big orange button. Does it push the plot forward? - yeah a bit not much, Did Reb need a drink of water after while reading it out over skype to me? Yep. Did she nearly laugh so hard she nearly fused her own laptop -possibly? OK we are pretty crazy people, maybe you'll get it maybe not. Thanks for the huge response to Chapter 59 Cinder burn : 554 reads in one day is some kind of record. Thanks from the bottom of our hearts for sticking with Pet.

Video: **Never** as a video on wattpad ever most reflected the chapter contents. This is what the video feature was meant for. BabyMetal Gimme chocolate!! Think of it as Cyborg's pet in song form.

Picture: Haven't had any futuristic slave outfits for a while, You know. Color reminds me of something.

21 seconds into the future: NMO date: 0002.7182

Planet 01/Region 01/Washington 2.0/Rockwood Hall/Room 404/Slave bed

Jenny's POV.

A few days later I was just coming too after my mid-morning nap. It was a quite day OK, you try being a pet. I get quiet days okay? Yeh even Pixel has low battery days right?

I was woken up by my collar telling me that someone was approaching. Incomes Kayla and Joe on their lunch break.

"Can we use your table I want to have a second opinion on how dumb my boyfriend is?" said, Kayla.

"What is it?" I asked.

"Get your table out and I'll show you," said Kayla.

I asked my collar to access the wall to show the digital table. Joe reluctantly sent his slave stream to the table. At first, the video is blank but that because we are not allowed to see a video of him 'at work' Kayla flicks through the video and starts from last night but there is a picture of a robot there.

"What's going on?" I asked

"Mr cinder here had a date with a robot last night," said Kayla.

"Robots have emotional needs too," said Joe.

"You're seriously going to believe that colour crap? There's only one thing that a robot ones out of people, and it is not your ability as a cook. They want blood. Mostly your blood. After they've got your blood, then they want you to do everything they've seen on dark side of the Internet." Kayla said.

"I'm short of detail guys can you fill me in?" I said.

"Remember it turns out that as a perk for working here the robots can put themselves on to Cinder. They can't force you to do anything but if you consent you can end up being their girlfriend. Mr Genius here only had to stick to the usual plan. Turn up, have dinner, say no thank you and goodbye" Kayla said

While Kayla was saying all this to me, Joe was flicking backwards and forwards in the video stream trying to get to the bits he remembered. This time he was sitting in some kind of booth, the robot who was an 8ft tall Paradise systems slave control robot sat opposite. The control systems we called overseers were bipedal. They had heads with about five eyes of different sizes and the personality of gangster rapper who got fired when they worked for the Nazis.

We watched the slave cam stream

{

"Hi - I'm Kijo," said the robot on the slave stream video as he sat down

"Where are you?" I asked Joe.

"It's the restricted section in the restaurant," said Kayla.

"It has a restricted section? Why's it restricted?" I said.

"shut up and listen," said Kayla.

We watched the video from Joe's collar cam.

"I hope you don't mind babe, but I ordered for you," said the robot Kijo on the video.

"What a condescending bucket of bolts," I said.

"Err no, that's fine," said Joe then suddenly a pizza was delivered onto the table.

}

I stopped the video.

"IS THAT PIZZA?" I said. "THEY CAN MAKE PIZZA? All we get is that healthy crap" I said my eye sticking out on stalks like an alien invader.

"Turns out the robots can order a whole bunch of food slaves can't. Wait it gets better," says Joe. starting the video again.

{

"Bet you would like some of this," said Kijo the Robot on the video. Holding up a bottle.

"Is that wine?" said Joe on the video.

}

"Is that wine? TIHS its wine. They have wine?" I said getting a level one PG shock. No wonder there was a restricted section in the cafeteria. If the slaves knew there was pizza they would probably be a riot.

"See - see that's what I said, " said Joe finally vindicated.

We watched hungrily as Joe proceeded to eat pizza smiring his lipstick as he eat.

"Hey. I'm his pet, and even I don't get pizza or wine," I said conveniently forgetting the champagne as oblivion detox I had. I guessed from his reaction, neither did Joe in the harem.

The Video continued

{

The conversation went on and on. Mostly it was Kijo doing all the talking. I could see Joe's blood pressure and heart rate start off high and decline as the glass of wine kicked in.

"What's that?" said Joe pointing at Kijo's arm.

"I wanna introduce you to a personal friend of mine. This is an M41A pulse rifle. Ten millimetre with over-and-under thirty-millimetre pump action grenade launcher" said Kijo the robot on the video waving his arm around and opening the gun cover.

"Wow is that a 10-millimetre stun-bolt?" said Joe.

The weapon tech talk went on for a while. Then it paused, and then it continued again.

}

"What kind of idiot are you?" said Kayla to Joe, turing the volume down.

"What do you mean? He kept asking me questions about the harem I had to shut me up so I could eat the pizza. What's wrong with that? " said Joe.

"No! You showed you were interested in things he was interested in. You got him to talk about himself. Now he's going to start liking you, and he's going to think that you like him" said Kayla.

"He is? Oh, Kcuf" said Joe.

"You may have the body of a frail woman but you have the heart and stomach of a grade one emotional male retard. Why were you looking into his eyes so much?" I said. OK, a little harsh I admit.

"The collar kept telling me to do it. Look if I knew this was how you got people to like you do you think I wouldn't have tried it on my own kind by now? I'm going to rephrase that, on girls?" said Joe.

"You did it on me," said Kayla accusingly.

"Yes well, you were different. It was kind of easy to talk to you," said Joe looking at Kayla then away.

"Look why didn't you just tell him you came with extra plumbing?" I said.

"Are you crazy? Do you know what homophobes robots are? Their masculine self-image is so fragile that any hint of my extra plumbing would most likely lead to having him remove said plumbing with a pair of rusty scissors. My plan is just to say we aren't compatible and leave it at that. " said Joe.

"That's not the worst of it. It gets worse" said Kayla Playing the video from near the end of the dinner.

{

"So" Kijo the robot on the video "how about you and I take this little night to the next level? All you have to do is to sign your consent machine and Cinder can organize another date. After that, we can knock things up a level."

"Err Sure," said Joe on the stream.

}

"There your honour I suggest I have the dumbest boyfriend ever," said Kayla pointing at the table.

"Well, I must agree with my learned counsel that was the dumbest thing I have seen since my brother tried to pin the Kennedy assassin on a wet fish. WHAT IN YOU BURT OUT EXCUSE FOR A BRAIN POSSESSED YOU TO DO SOMETHING SO MONUMENTALLY DUMB?" I said to Joe.

"Thank you, my lord, I think I used very similar words my self," said Kayla.

"Err- well ... it was the wine. I was on a bit of calorie high. I thought I could walk away with another bottle for you, err" said Joe.

"Have they created a new order of stupid I wasn't previously aware of? You know If you agree to date that machine again, cinder rules say, even if you say no he gets a second bite a the cherry to talk you back? It's going to be two dates now before he's off your back and each date is an opportunity to discover the state of your plumbing an decided to tear you an extra a$$" said Kayla.

I nodded in full agreement.

The video played on.

{

"Not much for dessert here but when cinder organizes a new date I'll bring some of my supply of chocolate I looted in Brussels. You have beautiful eyes princess. You know I love the name 1327, the factory production line which made me had 32 in its serial code " said Kijo.

}

"What??. Stop! play that back," I said.

Both Kayla and I looked back at the table to make sure we had heard things right. We stood in perfect silence, tense with anticipation. We played it back slowly.

{

"Not much for dessert but when cinder organizes a new date I'll bring some of my supply of chocolate I looted in Brussels," said Kijo.

}

"Kayla please pinch me. OW. Thanks. did I just hear that?" I said. We played it again tensely.

{

"Not much for dessert but when cinder organizes a new date I'll bring some of my supply of chocolate I looted in Brussels," said Kijo.

}

"What's up?" said Joe looking confused.

"You didn't say that kcuf-er has got a supply of chocolate," said Kayla.

"Of course he did. I mean he had a supply of pizza and wine," said Joe.

"Kalya, I take it all back your boyfriend is genius!" I said. "I bow to your extreme robot dating skills and here by overturn my previous sentence. Case closed. " I said.

"Joe, my dear my loved one, you'rdso dating that robot twice. I know I'll program your makeup" said Kayla helpfully.

"You can use my clothes printer!" I said.

"There might be a slight charge later in chocolate" with both mumbled.

"kcuf - when was the last time you had any chocolate?" Kayla said to me.

"I can't remember. that's so sad :-(" I said. I actually asked my collar, and it searched my pre-slave history and found a wonderful little moment when I had shot into a local boutique chocolate shop near campus the day I had got a particularly impenetrable text which as either good or bad from my former boyfriend. If only I had known it was the last chocolate before slavery, I would have appreciated it more and possibly made a secret hoard somewhere.

"That is sad, I grieve for you my sister," said Kayla.

"What happened to the whole danger of dating a heavily armed killer robot who may re-work my plumbing with rusty scissors business?" said Joe.

"Aren't you paying attention. That was pre-chocolate? Now you're under skirt surprise danger has to be balanced against the very real possibility of chocolate," I said.

"You mean you're willing to risk my life to get your hands on chocolate?" said Joe.

"You know you are very cute in that lipstick, and I frequently take you for a real person but at the end of the day, I have to keep reminding myself, that no matter how curvy you look in that catsuit, you're still suffering from the long-term disability of extra plumbing. Unfortunately, this plumbing is attached, at a distance, to your greatest deficit, specifically a man's brain. This chocolate deficit syndrome of yours is simply a symptom of your wider condition what we technically call a Y chromosome excess disorder or in lay man's terms your not a girl," I said.

"Unfortunately and most cruelly for you. while you get to see the promised land and get to experience some of the wonderful parts of being a girl there are still other aspects of your Y chromosome excess disorder will never fully be and on parr with us," said Kayla.

"You're ongoing womb envy," I said, "manifest in your desire to borrow someone else's for reproductive purposes and in this specific case your complete inability to process the rather basic concept of chocolate," I said smiling.

"Sorry, you lost me at 'cute in that lipstick'," said Joe.

"Let me put it in terms a man could understand." I started "You bring her chocolate she will like you. Am I right Kayla?"

"You're not wrong Professor Jenny. Hang on I'm on Cinder as well." said Kayla "Joe - what would you say the secret of your chocolate carrying robot attraction is? Also could you also possibly mention me as your logical alternative? Something like 'now you mention it, I like you but I don't want to date you, but you might want to give 1066 a go.' Something that says - she's not cheap so do bring lots of chocolate. Oh and you need to find out how much chocolate it has and if it has other cute robots friends who also have a chocolate stash" said Kayla.

Joe's collar summoned him back to the harem. I guess you might think we were pretty ruthless pimping out our boyfriend or best friend to a mechanical John for chocolate. Well, I guess you would be quite right but you try being subjugated by mechanical overlords for eight months with not even the sign of a Twix, before judging us. Still, for our sin of sending our friend/boyfriend out digital street walking for chocolate, the big karma - Lama would very soon settle our accounts with one simple flight.

****

A/N How was that for you? OK not everyone gets what we find funny, that life. - Let us know if you didn't get it, or if you do that would be good too. To be honest we are still surprised anyone gets this stuff. Let alone the people who give us 100,000 reads! (Did we mention we have 100,000 reads... might have mentioned that)

OK, we probably offended about 13% of our readers with this one (guess how many Y chromosomes they have ). Don't worry they will get over it particularly with what's turning up on Tuesday. Speaking of which if you've already cast your eye over The Cyborg's daughter get ready for a revelation.

Look out for our Halloween weekend cover on the 31st!