I was sleeping alone for the third night. Meilin hadn't come to me and he was still healing from the wound. The attacker had been caught but unfortunately, it was Remus that had found him. Meilin had wanted to question him and personally deal with him, but Remus had killed him easily and quickly, dashing that thought away.

Shifting in the bed, I stared up at the ceiling, a sigh escaping my lips as I turned sideways, until I was staring at the moonbeams glowing on the floor of my room. Although it was inappropriate of me to think it since Meilin was injured and couldn't possibly do much without ripping open his stitches, I wanted to feel his touch once more, my body practically aching for it.

I pressed both of my hands against my heated cheeks, my breath coming hitched as I controlled the memories of our wedding night. I buried my head into the pillow, trying to calm myself since there were other matters to worry about.

When I couldn't get his image out of my head, I abruptly sat up in bed and pushed the covers off of me. My Father always told me that the worst thing to do when you couldn't fall asleep was to try to fall asleep. Heeding his words, I walked across my room and tied the sleeping robes securely around me, my long hair reaching down to my waist, unrestrained and loose. I hesitated when I reached my door but I pushed it open without thinking and slipped out, padding along the halls silently.

After passing through various hallways, I rounded the corner and came close to Meilin's room. I hesitated before pushing the door open and slipping inside. I didn't bother knocking because if he was asleep, I didn't want to wake him up. Meilin was a light sleeper and if the sound of my voice was enough to lull him out of his sleep, I was positive a knock on the door would have the same effect.

When I entered the main room, I couldn't believe that the entire Peccata were sprawled around the room. Remus was fast asleep on one of the couches while Thera was on the one adjacent to his. Nikator had thrown a blanket on the ground and was lying next to Atreus, who was also sleeping. Minos was sleeping on the ground a little farther than Nikator, and Vita was lying on another couch.

The door to the bedroom was wide open and from my vantage point, I could see Meilin sleeping on it. My heart trembled at the sight of the Peccata; they were so worried for him that they slept in his room?

Tiptoeing past them, I slipped into Meilin's room, smiling when I saw him lying on his back, his eyes shut closed. Moonlight filtered in through the window and as I stepped deeper inside the room, I thought about the first time I had met him and how much fear I had been choking on. Even now, there was a part of me that feared the intimidating and powerful man before me, but there was another part of me that knew that he wouldn't hurt me and that he wasn't wholly bad.

Still, was I able to look past the darkness tainting his aura? Was I able to forget that he killed people, that he wasn't afraid to hurt others, and that his path consisted of evil?

Although he was negative in my positive world, I couldn't forget his soft kisses, the way he was gentle with me, and the way he called me his little rabbit.

I slowed at the foot of his bed and rounded towards him quietly, seating myself on the edge of the bed as I brought a hand to his face. I swept his hair aside gently, tracing the side of his face and staring at his pale features. His skin was so clear it was like porcelain, but his eyes were so contrasting; they were such a dark shade of sin, so unfathomable and unreadable, so ebony colored.

I hadn't been able to see him ever since he got stabbed, since he was busy on ensuring that every single traitor among the ranks were eliminated. He was more adamant than ever and more absorbed in his work, and he was slightly immobilized, though he still moved—Bohai and Fang tried to stop him as much as possible.

I never really realized how much he worked for the empire and how much time he put into making sure everything was running smoothly, that there weren't any problems, and that if there were problems, that they were promptly fixed. Fang had told me that Meilin was focusing more on helping the poorer villages throughout the empire and that Meilin's popularity as the Dragon was so sinister partially due to the stress he was putting on the upper class in order for the lower classes to breathe.

As an emperor, he was an improvement to his brother, but that was hard for people to see since his reign was tainted with so much blood and fear.

Though, as a person? I still wasn't sure, because although he made reforms and worked hard for his people, his aura was painted with danger and he wasn't afraid to commit evil acts.

Pushing back his bangs, I ran my fingers through his hair, my shoulders dropping as I thought about sharing him with another woman. When would he grow bored of me and get a concubine? How much time would pass before he would have a harem? How many wives would he take? My hands shook at that thought and I retracted my touch from him, pressing my hand to my chest.

Meilin might be entranced by my innocence now, but when would he grow bored of me and choose another woman?

Would I have to wrestle for his attention?

I rose to my feet and turned to leave, bitterness scorching my tongue.

A hand gripped onto my wrist and I froze. "What's wrong?" Meilin said in a sleep laden voice.

His eyes were two pools of darkness in the shadows of the room, his skin as pale as the moonlight. He let go of my wrist and yawned, pressing a knuckle against his mouth before running a hand through his messy fringe. "I didn't think you would come here too."

"You mean all of them?" I pointed at the open door, where the other room lay and where the Peccata were sprawled about.

"They were worried," Meilin said with another yawn. He tried shifting in the bed but then he winced, frowned, and sighed out loud before crossing his arms behind his head. "And you?"

"I came to check up on you."

"Hmmm." He closed his eyes and brought his hands to his chest, where he folded them atop each other.

"You're a really light sleeper," I noted. "You wake up from everything."

"I know," he said, his eyes flicking open. "I've always been a light sleeper, but ever since I got the dragon's blood in me, it's gotten worse. My hearing is much better than the average person." He motioned towards his ears. "Not as good as the Lupus Daemonium Clan, but better than the average person. That plays a part in waking me, I suppose."

"Lupus Dae—" My eyes widened and I gasped. "You don't mean the Wolves, do you?"

His eyes danced with amusement at my reaction. "Yes, the Wolves."

"Magic is so fascinating," I whispered. "Especially the thought that some people are so much more different."

"The Wolves don't look too different, but yes, they are different."

"You've seen them?"

He nodded. "They're in the Ice Lands, as you know, but I traveled there once. Lebel is nearby, as you know, and we—the Peccata, Fang, Bohai, and I—wanted to go there so that Nikator could see his region of birth. Anyhow, we took a detour towards the Ice Lands and bumped into a faction of the Clan. The Wolves can hear a leaf drop on the ground; their hearing is better than any other group I've seen."

The Lupus Daemonium Clan consisted of people who had the magic of the Wolf Beast. They were stronger, faster, and better than humans when it came to fighting, but they kept to themselves, rarely interacting with humans. It was said that Demons and Wolves could evenly face each other off, and that some Wolves were strong enough to break entire mountains and destroy landmarks.

"Can you tell me about them?" I asked.

"There's not much to tell," he said. "They're really strong. Much stronger than me. Their punches are ten times stronger than that of a demon. My punches are probably half of their strength, though I was evenly matched for a couple of them. A few, though, had honed their skills and were very strong."

"And?"

"And what?"

"Can you tell me more?" I sat on the edge of the bed. "I've always had an interest in magic."

"They're really recluse. Their senses are much more heightened than the average human, so they can smell when someone has entered their territory and they're not kind to strangers waltzing within their lands. When we entered their territory, a few wolves—two or three—came to us and stopped us. They threatened to kill us if we didn't leave." He smiled at the memory, while I stared at him in awe, trying to imagine what it must've been like to be in the Wolves' presence.

"So did you run away?"

"No, Remus went a little wild and jumped, ready to pounce and kill the closest Wolf for threatening us. The Wolf punched him easily and sent him flying. I caught him before he could go too far, but they became intrigued by our group when they realized I was strong. They asked me if I was a demon and I told them no."

I leaned in closer. "Was Remus ok? Weren't you angry that he attacked them?"

"I should've expected him to act like that. The Wolf that attacked him didn't hit him that hard since Remus was only about eight at that time. He was alright but he was stunned for a moment. Well, the Wolves were intrigued by our motley crew, a few of them sparred with us and let us stay at their village for the night. It was a really interesting. They're very recluse so it's probably a once in a lifetime experience."

"Can they turn into wolves?" I asked, thinking back to the stories I had heard about the savage beasts that roamed the Ice Lands.

He shook his head. "Nope, though a few of them have hair as white as snow and amber eyes."

"And sharp teeth and claws?"

"They do have sharp claw-like nails and sharp teeth, but other than that they're very human like."

"I wish I could see them," I whispered. "Oh, and demons too."

"Aren't you scared of them? Demons are vicious and enslave humans, you know."

"They're scary but so interesting," I said. "Besides, not all demons are like that, right? Remus isn't like that."

"Remus wasn't raised in a Clan," he said. "But yes, they're not all like that."

"Magic is so interesting," I said once more. "It's so different and amazing. I honestly wish I could see more of it."

"You've never traveled outside the Huo Empire?"

"No."

"I've traveled a lot." He ran a hand through his hair and yawned loudly. "Sanguis, the Da'al Empire, Arile, Kadios, Lebel—to name a few."

"This was all before becoming the emperor, right?"

"Yes. I haven't traveled outside the empire since then."

"If I had the opportunity, I would travel a lot as well. Though, I wouldn't know how to speak the languages, but I would love to learn."

"Some languages are harder than others. I was taught Jahk, the main language in Kadios, and Fadian, the main language of Sanguis, since those two kingdoms are next to the Huo Empire. My Fadian is better than my Jahk."

"Why were you taught those languages?"

"Have you forgotten that I was a prince? A bastard prince but an acknowledged prince nonetheless."

It was hard to think that the previous emperor Yan was his brother. I had never heard of a bastard prince, but it was common for emperors to have many children. Still, if he was an acknowledged prince, people must've heard about him. I voiced my opinion out loud.

"I was presumed dead when I was seventeen," he said with a shrug. "I survived, obviously, but I was already far from the palace and since everyone assumed I was dead, I just left the empire and traveled. I didn't care about the royal family or any of that, so I just did whatever I wanted. I was free. It's no wonder you haven't heard of me, I was thought dead twenty years ago. You're twenty-four; you were only four when I left the empire. No one really talks about dead people that have done nothing important."

"That makes sense." Questions were at the tip of my tongue, but I calmed myself. I wanted to know more about his family, the reason he killed his brother, why and how he hated his family, but I couldn't voice my questions. I wanted to know more about his past but I couldn't ask him.

"Lie down next to me," he said, his gaze drifting to my sleeping robes and then back at my face.

I obliged, going to the other side of the bed and curling up next to him, my heart pounding loudly in my ears and my thoughts becoming jumbled as I stared at his beautiful, pale face. A part of me wanted him to touch me, or hold my hand, or do something, but he kept one hand rested on his chest while the other was underneath his head. He was staring up at the ceiling.

I hesitantly raised my hand and touched at the scar above his eyebrow. It was length of my thumb and it was diagonal, not horizontal or vertical, indicating that he must've been cut by accident and not purposely carved into him.

"How did you get this?" I asked him.

His dark eyes were set on me. "My brother."

I traced the scar before pulling my hand away.

"He got angry and slashed me. I was ten and he was sixteen."

"Why did he hate you so much?" I asked curiously. Normally, siblings didn't act that way towards each other. My brothers and sisters acted out every now and then, but none had inflicted severe wounds to each other.

"His mother was the empress while mine was a servant to the royal family. She worked in the palace; she would cook and clean. He didn't like that I was his brother, but he didn't bother me much until I was acknowledged by the emperor when I was ten. After my father acknowledged that I was his son and a member of the royal family, Yan wanted me dead."

"That's a stupid reason to hate someone."

"He was a stupid and cruel person." He shrugged. "My father was the same—a vain, pompous fool."

I rested my head against the pillows and watched him. His face was obscured by the shadows and his eyes were closed.

"Do you know what it means to put the royal sigil on someone?"

"Doesn't that mean that they are a member of the royal family?"

"Yes." His eyes opened. "My father put the mark on me when I was ten, making it official that I was his son. He did it for the most stupid and vain reason."

"Why did he?"

"I was ten and I was—am— beautiful. People commented about how beautiful I was all the time. The nobles would see me and think I was the most beautiful child in the empire. The Generals and Commanders said the same things, as did their wives. As a child, I worked in the palace, since my father hadn't acknowledged me. I would serve food and sometimes I would clean, so it was normal for me to be with important people serving food or cleaning around them. My father was sometimes there too but he never really looked at me.

"People were always talking about my looks, but it was when I was ten that more people talked. My father heard it a lot and that was when he wanted it to be known that the beautiful child was his beautiful child. He wanted people to know that I was the way he looked because, naturally, I was his son." He sighed and pushed back his hair. "I am his son, but I look nothing like him. My looks are from my mother. The only thing I got from him is my height. Still, that's the only reason he acknowledged me as his. Such a worthless reason."

We both laid there in silence after that. I was staring at him while lying on my side, analyzing his face and trying to imagine him as a ten year old. He kept his gaze locked on the ceiling, his expression calm and somewhat neutral.

"Does it hurt?" I asked him, bringing my hand to rest gently atop where his wound was at. His body went rigid under my touch. "I'm thinking that's a yes?"

"It's not that bad, but yes, it hurts."

"I don't understand why you were so stubborn," I said, running my hand through his hair. "You could've died."

"I won't die that easily."

"It's a serious wound and you made everyone worry about you so much. You could've gotten it patched up much quicker and saved everyone the worry. Everyone was so worried about you, and it was even worse since you wouldn't help yourself." I rested a hand on his cheek, my cheeks burning as I stared at him. "I don't want you to die."

He grabbed my hand. "Aren't you scared of me?"

"No," I said honestly. "You're a terrifying man, no doubt, but when you're like this, gentle and calm, I don't fear you."

"So when I'm angry or not calm, or not gentle, you're scared of me?" He had a half-tilt of a smirk on his face, clearly amused.

"Of course! Have you seen the look on your face and in your eyes when you're angry? You look like you'll kill everyone."

"I won't hurt you."

"I know, but it's scary to see your rage."

"Why have you been acting so different lately? So worried and caring," he said abruptly. "Ever since we've been married, you've been . . . different."

Color flushed over my cheeks and I nodded, knowing exactly why I had been so much more bold around him. "We . . . We're married now, so things are different. Plus you were so . . . sweet and gentle. There are so many things I want to know about you so that I can better understand you, but I know that you're not wholly bad. You might think that you're an evil person, but I've seen parts of you that are sweet. The way you treat the Peccata, the way you take care of Yat-sen, the way you treat me and Bohai and Fang . . . You're better than you think and I want to understand more of you."

"I've still killed people and I've still committed atrocities," he said simply. "Chaste, sweet, and intimate moments between us isn't going to change that fact. Nobody is wholly good or bad, so it's only natural I have some redeeming qualities. You can't write off everything I've done and everything I'll continue to do just because I care for you."

What he was saying was true, but there was a part of me that didn't want to look at the bad things he did. I didn't want to have my thoughts of him flooded by the things that he had done. I didn't want to think about him killing that person and I didn't want to replay the memories of him killing that spy a few weeks ago. The moments I had with him weren't bad, and I knew I couldn't write off everything he did just because he was sweet to me, but I had to accept all of him. If I was going to be with him, there was no way I could forget the deadly side of him that existed.

"I care for you," I said carefully. "I can't overlook the bad that you've done, but I want to . . . continue living this life with you and understand you better. I want to learn to accept all of you. I won't turn away from the bad that you've done and I don't think I'll ever be able to accept the bad you do, but I want to be with you."

He didn't say anything for the longest time, just stared at me with those dark eyes of his. Finally after a dragged out moment of silence, he stared out our clasped hands before turning his gaze to the ceiling. My heart was thrumming in my chest and color was blooming on my cheeks for admitting that I wanted to be with him. I had just told him that I wanted to live life with him and understand him. Wasn't that a declaration of love? Not exactly love, but small baby steps towards it?

"I love too easily," he said finally. "Before you, there were two other women that I loved."

For some reason, hearing those words hurt my heart. Knowing that he loved women was hard for me to handle. It was hard for me to imagine him holding their hands, kissing them, hugging them, sleeping with them—it was a hard concept to grasp—and yet I knew that it was childish of me to hold it against him since he didn't know me before them. Still, my heart couldn't help but ask if he would choose them over me, if he had met me and them at the same time. Jealousy tugged at my heart but I pushed it away. After all, I had loved Heng as well and had even wanted to start a life with him.

I also remembered Nikator telling me about the women that Meilin loved, so it wasn't a whole new concept for me to grasp, but it was still difficult to digest, especially since I was now harboring inklings of feelings towards him.

"Erato was beautiful but nasty inside," Meilin said. "Doris was sweet and loving but couldn't love only one man. It's odd, isn't it, how someone as tainted as me, as deadly and evil as me, can fall in love so easily? I love and care for people too easily, but it's hard for me to trust people. I might love them, but I don't know if I can ever trust someone wholly. Too many people have let me down in the past. Erato and Doris both let me down."

I squeezed his fingers. "Love is hard."

"It is."

"I loved a man," I whispered. He watched me carefully, his mouth set in a straight line. There was no disgust or anger brewing in his eyes, only understanding. Obviously, he knew that things didn't work out since I was here with him right now. "His name was Heng and I've known him since I was a child. He and I were born in the same village and we both fell in love with each other. We were supposed to marry, but then, five years ago, he died during the rebellion."

"He was a member of the imperial army?"

"Yes."

"My men took him down," Meilin whispered.

"Yes."

"And yet you don't hate me or my men. You've only shown kindness."

"Yes, because that is the nature of war. No one is truly killing the other for personal reasons. It's a war and the soldiers know what they're getting themselves into. Heng knew that if he was a soldier, then there was a chance that he would die. I don't harbor ill intentions to the people that killed Heng, since that is what it means to be at war."

"War is cruel," he said simply.

I nodded. "It is. Though, I'm glad that I was able to love him. I suppose it wasn't my destiny to marry him and have a family with him. Still, he will remain in my heart and I will remember him as the first man I ever loved."

"That's depressing for me to hear," he said with an amused smile, though it didn't reach his eyes. He let go of my hand and pushed back some of his hair to the side, sighing and staring up at the ceiling once more. "The women I loved are still alive and yet I don't love them. Your love for Heng is immortalized in your heart since he died loving you."

"Heng is my first love, but I still have room for others."

"I see," he said. "But you know, I think I'm already in love with you."

I froze, my eyes widening at his words. Everything around me seemed to disappear and the only thing I could focus on was the seriousness and intensity of his shadowy eyes. They were so black and brilliant that I felt like I was being absorbed into them, my heart pounding violently as I held my breath. This beautiful man with darkness in his eyes loved me?

Drakkon Meilin—the emperor, the Dragon, the usurper—loved me?

Color flushed over my cheeks and my body, my ears tipped with heat as I slowly sat upright.

"It'll take time, but you'll be mine," he said calmly. "I'll make you love me."

"You love me?" I breathed.

"Yes. I love you, Daiyu."

"I—" I swallowed, unable to say anything. I fiddled with the end of my sleeve and couldn't come up with words to say, my mouth dry and my heart beating to a thunderous beat. My chest was tight and there were millions of butterflies swirling inside my stomach as happiness burst in my chest.

He rubbed the side of his face and sighed loudly. "Just go to sleep. I'm going to sleep too."

"But—"

"Don't say it back," he said. "I know you don't feel that way and I don't want you to be spurred by the moment and say something you'll regret. For now, just sleep."

"Alright," I said quietly.

He closed his eyes and we both remained that way for a while. After a long moment, his steady breaths became more relaxed and I realized that he had fallen asleep once more. Watching him for a moment, I closed my eyes and tried to fall asleep, though that seemed hard since I couldn't get over the fact that he loved me.