----I know you guys hate super long authors notes but there is one at the bottom of this chapter with some actual important things to know coming into this book concerning POV's and update schedules as well as getting in touch with me!----

Kate

The skies were dark, blanketed with a thick layer of clouds. It was fitting for such a day to be dreary and sad. It was fitting for a funeral. Not one of the suited men outside raised an umbrella as they stood in salute.



I was surprised at how many people were there honestly. I probably shouldn't have been, but I was. I hadn't realized what a family this truly was. He had a family. And family was everything.

"Are you okay?" Stacey whispered to me.

No. No I was not.

I didn't answer, just watched as a priest took the stage in front of the casket. Stacey turned towards Pietro who wrapped his arms around her. I had no one to hold me.

The priest began droning on. A generic spiel about how he was a kind and generous man, brave with many friends and a family who loved him. He led us in prayer, the ceremony felt surreal.

I wasn't crying, I wasn't ready to break down. I was furious.

The priest spoke for maybe twenty some minutes and then a few others took the stage. I looked behind me to where row after row after row of police men stood.

Uncle Sammy stood in the very center and every other officer on the force, including a very blonde Nash, stood behind him. He should be up here too. He was his brother after all. Maybe not in blood, but in heart.

I turned back to the priest and finally, just as he was getting ready to bring the ceremony to a close I changed my mind. I had been firm on the notion that I did not want to speak. I took a few steps forward and without my even asking he smiled gently. "Mr. Santoro's daughter would now like to say a few words on her father's behalf."

I took the stage and looked out. Nash gave me a gentle nod and Sammy didn't budge an inch. "I know you've all heard the ceremony, the one that says what a brave and unique individual my father was. It sounds almost generic, but in this case it was true. My dad loved being a cop, he loved nothing more. I begged him from the bottom of my heart to please take a desk job not even a year ago as he insisted on looking at me through the hole in his arms from a gunshot wound. I love all of you guys and I am so glad to have the support of the whole NYPD holding me up right now, but my nose would grow at least two feet if I said that right now, in this very moment, I was glad he was in the force. I'm angry. Honestly. He should be here. He should be here to walk me down the aisle when I get married, should be here to pull coins out from behind his grandson's ear when I have kids, I should have a father still. And I don't, and I am hurt by this." I looked down for a few moments. "It was a stupid mistake. I mean, even I know not to go into open fire without back up. Without the area secured. I don't, I don't know what he was thinking."

It was a lie. I knew exactly what he was thinking. He was thinking of the woman and two children inside who were held hostage at gun point by the crazy and high ex-boyfriend. When he'd heard gun fire he'd gone in. He'd killed the ex-boyfriend but as it turned out he wasn't alone. Dad had managed to take out two of the criminals but one had gotten away. Regardless, he had saved the family. He wouldn't have wanted to go out any other way.

So I said just that. "He went out the way he would have wanted to. Nothing else would have made him more proud. He lived his life for everyone but himself. And for that, I will be angry, and I will be hurt, but I will always, and I do mean always, be proud. Rest in paradise." I stepped off the podium quickly and walked away from the grave completely.

Nash broke out of the line of officers and followed me. The ground was wet and my heels kept sinking into it. I cursed angrily through blurry eyes at the shoes. This is precisely why I didn't wear heels! Nothing good ever came from wearing heels.

Nash caught up to me easily and wrapped me up in his arms before I even had a chance to recognize that I had been followed. I hugged him back, hard. I needed this. Needed someone. "You shouldn't be here." I muttered.

Nash and Ellie had moved to Ohio. Staying here wasn't exactly an option anymore. Even with the change of hair and eyes he was still recognizable and even from behind bars the Mafia leaders found ways to continually maintain some level of control out here, as I always insisted they would.

Nash had wanted to go further. He had tried to tell Ellie how amazing the beach in California was but she had one simple request. Seasons. She wanted to move somewhere that still had seasons. So the NYPD had relocated him to Ohio per Ellie's request.

"Shut the hell up." He muttered and kissed the side of my head. "You know I wouldn't leave you alone through this." He finally let go of me but kept both hands on my shoulders and held me at only arm's length away. "How are you holding up?"

"Terribly."

He gave me a sympathetic look. "And Alessio?" "Getting by." I muttered.

"I'll bet it's hard not having him here."

"He never liked Dad anyway." I tried to play it off like it didn't hurt. But it did. It fȕcking hurt. Everything hurt. Everything was screwed up. I could only hope that the move would help things at least a little bit.

Nash pulled me into him, putting one arm over my shoulder. "Do you want me to drive you to visit him?"

"I should be with Sammy."

"Honestly Kate, I think he'd like to be alone but feels like he should be with you. I heard him talking."

We lingered for a good while. Sitting on a bench as far away from my father's final burial as we could find until Uncle Sam finally trudged down the path. He had his hat tucked under his shoulder, his hair was dripping. Where I had kept under an umbrella for most of the day he and all of the other officers had not.

"Hey, you're the tart, right?" He motioned towards Nash. "He liked you."

Nash forced a smile. I stood up and hugged Sammy. He was cold and wet and even his hug was stiff. I forced myself to stay composed at his strong embrace. "Are you okay?" I asked him into the hug.

"Hey now, I'm the one who is supposed to be looking out for you now."

"Now? You always have been."

He sighed and we pulled apart. The silence weighed down on us. And then there were two. We were alone. All we had was each other. And I was to leave him.

"I-I have to go back to the hospital."

"I'll drive you." He said practically on automatic response.

"If it's all the same, the tart offered. Unless you wanted to."

He looked a little relieved through his guilt. "Actually, I would kind of like to stay for a bit. Have some alone time with your father."

"I understand." I said softly. He hugged me again, long, painful, heartbroken hugs and we parted ways.

I made it all the way to Nash's car before I started sobbing. Apparently something he had been fully prepared for because before I even opened the door he was holding me again.

He leaned back against the car and held me tightly all the while.

My father was dead. How could he have been so stupid? How could he have been so careless? How could he have done this to me?

"Excuse me. Y-you're Kate right. Kate Santoro."

Nash released me and I turned around. I didn't get questions like this quite so often since I had given up my job two months ago.

A young woman stood before me, a baby girl on her hip and a little boy in a suit holding her other hand no older than Ellie. "His daughter?"

I nodded numbly.

"I'm so sorry." She breathed and I knew by the tone of her voice exactly who she was.

I looked down to the little boy, bright green eyes watched me intently. He was too smart, I could tell just by looking at him. I wanted to scream. But I crouched down to the boys instead and forced a smile. "Hi. My name is Kate, what's your name?"

"Logan."

"That's a nice name Logan. What do you want to be when you grow up Logan?"

He was quite for a few moments and his mother forced a sympathetic and perhaps embarrassed smile. "A police man." He finally answered.

I held my hands out to him and he let go of his mother's hand to take them. "Good. It's a good job, but only really, really great people can do it. It's for only the best of the best. Now I know my daddy would be so proud of you if you could go ahead and do that okay. Be the best of the best for him, alright?"

He nodded. I gave his hands a gentle squeeze and stood up. "Thank you." I said to the mother who looked even more emotional today than I did.

"He saved my babies."

"That's all he wanted."

She gave me a strong one armed hug as the baby was in her other arm and kept thanking me through tears.

When we finally pulled apart she stumbled away in hysterics and I got into the car where I held it mostly together until we started out I began crying even worse than before.





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Hey readers! So it begins! I sort of wanted you guys t panic in the beginning, being the whole funeral thing ;D

Anyway there's a few really important things I actually do need to touch upon!

FIRST being povs. There will not be bonus chapters in this book, there will simply be different POV's. Meaning, yes, Alessio, probably mostly still Kate, I honestly don't even know yet. I will put at the top of every chapter a character in italics like I did this one. If ever I should forget to lable the chapter it's probably in Kate's pov. There will definitely be Kate's POV of course, Alessio's POV, and on some occasion, there may even be other characters. SO PAY ATTENTION! I will not address each and every chapter to remind you as I have in the past for the bonus chapters, this is your notice to pay attention to the name on the top. The only time I will address will be in time lapses, IF they occur, because I haven't decided that yet either. Time lapse would be say there is a scene written in Kate's POV, the next chapter I want o write the same scene in Alessio's pov, instead of what comes next it's be what you already read just different pov, time lapse. I'll give you guys a heads up to those IF they occur.



Second important notice! Usually when I start publishing a book on wattpad I have a surplus of chapters already prepared, this way I can assure weekly updates on time. This is why you've had maybe three late chapters in the entire series. Unfortunately with a crazy hectic work schedule since I've taken on the new position and still doing the whole adulting thing with kids and boyfriend and such, my free time is seriously hurting and I've been in this funk. I haven't written a damn thing in three weeks. (you might notice I said I would begin this book when one and two were revised and book one is hardly even done. Yeah, I decided not to make you wait anymore.) I can still definitely promise you weekly updates, but I don't want to for sure promise they will be every midnight on Monday. I THINK i will be able to maintain, but from experience if I press myself too much the quality of my writing falters. Even if I don't get em out midnight Monday I think I should still manage one weekly even if it's not until Wednesday or Thursday or something. I'm hoping by starting the story now I will start following all your wonderful comments and votes and inspiration will hit me again and I can start banging out chapters the way I usually do and this whole authors note will be moot (when I'm into it a chapter can get done in hour...when I'm not...days...) So basically there is a slight possibility you may have some late updates later on down the line, but I should definitely still get one out weekly even if a few times it takes until later in the week. That being said there will be no double update weeks until I get over this writing funk. Last (and not super important notice) is that you can find both WTSGD and CS on Goodreads now! I would be eternally grateful for rates and reviews and as I get more chapters prepared I may be able to start bribing you guys ;D

Now, please help me get super inspired to start banging out chapters again! To those of you who have reached out to me over the past few weeks with no reply don't think I'm ignoring you guys. I am not kidding you when I say I am SWAMPED. I LOVE getting messages and shit from you guys and I will, erm, eventually, maybe, hopefully, reply to each and every one of you guys!