Sorry for any grammar and editing mistakes.

Kjære venn: Dear friend

Enjoy!

-&-

Chapter 40

The sudden growl sounding from the dark expanse of the trees around us sent a flash of fear down my spine. I gasped and snapped away from the large monster stalking slowly out of the forest.

"Don't worry." Adie's voice instantly eased the terror ringing through me, his arm curling protectively around my waist and pulling me into his strong side. "I would never let anything hurt you. Besides-" He started softly and pulled away to approach the large being. "He is an old friend."

I stood frozen, my eyes wide as I watched the wolf with fur such a dark brown it could have easily been mistaken for black approach the God of the Moon's outstretched hand. "It has been a while, kjære venn." He spoke softly to the creature, his tone that of a dear friend as he claimed the wolf to be.

Despite his reassuring words, and the way the animal sniffed at his hand before letting Adranus softly pet his furry head, I was still uneasy. I remembered little, if nothing, from my mortal time spent on the realm, but I did know wolves were feared. Massive creatures that could kill with one swipe of their claws or snap of their fangs. It was why no one dared venture to the colder parts of the world.

"Emerense, come." Adie urged softly, his free hand outstretched towards me as the other rested against the wolf's head. The creature was large, so much so that his head reached the middle of Adranus' chest- it was as large as I.

I hesitated, my throat dry as I tried to swallow nervously. I trusted the god, more than anything, but the wolf looked as if he could eat me in one bite. "He will not hurt you, my dear one." Adranus urged again, that same hand reaching out for me patiently. I gulped again before taking slow, hesitant steps towards the duo.

My hand slipped easily into his, those strong fingers curling tightly around mine and pulling me back into the safety of his side. The creature watched me the whole time, its bright eyes narrowed as the immortal pulled me towards it. Adranus took my hand, despite my hesitation, and held it out between us and the wild beast.

It sniffed my hand, much like it had to Adie's, before lowering its head in acknowledgment. "He's letting you pet him." He murmured in my ear and nudged me closer to the wolf. I took my hand from his and, carefully, let my fingers brush along the top of the creature's furry head.

It made a harsh noise in the back of its throat, one that made my movements still immediately, but Adranus only chuckled. "He is a little rough around the edges but means no harm." I let my touch run softly over the wolf's head, his warm fur tickling the pads of my fingers. He made another sound, but it was closer to a purr than anything else.

A smile started to pull on my lips. "Does he have a name?" I asked Adranus as the wolf lowered its head, so I could pet down his strong neck. I didn't miss the pleased gleam in the god's eyes, or how he slowly loosened his arm from around me-but I did not mind.

"He is a wild animal, free in the world and ruler of the Mountain. To name him would demoralize him..."

I could hear the 'however' hanging at the end of his statement, and I turned my head just enough for those bright blue eyes to see my raised eyebrow. He shot me that half smirk he loved so much and let his own hand once again run along the creature's dark fur.

The wolf raised his large head once again, his pointed ears stood straight to interpret all sounds around us. He stood strong and proud against the darkness of the forest, the light of the full moon reflected brightly off those unearthly golden eyes.

"I call him Eirik."

-&-

"Emrie..." Soft fingers gently brushed away the dark hair covering my face. I groaned and tried to turn away from the touch, but my body had no room to move. "Wake up, my lady." It was a struggle to blink my eyes open, to move, but that voice would not leave me be.

Bright, gold eyes were staring down at me in concern, and the worry on their owner's face was unfamiliar to me. I could only stare up at him, my body numb though my heart ached. "Are you hurt?" He asked after a tense moment of silence.

I did not respond, even though my neck ached from resting against the hard edge so long and I was incredibly weak from the massive outburst of power.

"My lady?" He urged again, his hand wavering uncertainly over my hair. My own hand slowly lifted from my lap until the tips of my fingers could just barely brush over his gruff cheek. His bright eyes widened at the action, but he did not pull away as I expected.

"I know you..." My voice was scratchy and hoarse as it passed my dry tongue, though the widening of his gaze indicated he heard. "I remember you."

He was silent, his large body unmoving as those eyes stared holes into my gaze. Then he slowly, carefully, lifted his hand away from me and covered the one I had pressed to his cheek. His eyes closed, he let out a shaky breath, then pressed his face into my small palm.

"I am sorry, Emrie. I am so incredibly sorry." The complete and total remorse in his voice surprised me, but I was too tired to let it show. He practically cradled my hand between his and his cheek.

"He has lied about everything." My mood instantly darkened, though I was far too exhausted for another outburst. Terif's eyes shot open, his grip easing as I laid back once again.

"They were not lies-"

"Do not... defend him."

His eyes flashed, but he did not continue and for that I was grateful. "Why did you not tell me?" I murmured as he squeezed my hand tightly one last time before letting me return it to my lap. His gaze flickered away uneasily, his tongue wetting his lips before he let out a heavy sigh.

"I did not know you at first-I did not remember you." He started softly, his tone as sad as the look haunting his golden eyes. "Centuries had pass since the last I saw you, and all I knew was the bitter depression the loss of my mate had caused." He paused, his gaze sweeping over my pale and exhausted face.

"It was weeks before I finally remembered, and by then North had remembered too... Please, let me take you from here, my lady. You need proper rest." I was not used to this concerned behavior of his, or the desperate plea in his voice. It was unnerving. I let out a small sigh and turned from his as best as I could, although it was hard to move in such a cramped space.

"I am fine here."

"You are in a washtub, and the room is destroyed. You need rest somewhere more suitable."

I did not answer him at first. I didn't want to leave and risk running into that-that traitor. I hadn't meant to destroy the room, had not meant to cause such chaos, but I had been furious and the power inside of me raged. The King-Adranus-only left when it had exploded from my being and realized I would not calm down until he did. Despite my screams for him to leave me be sooner.

That must have been hours ago, and he has not bothered me since-that I was aware of at least. I had been so tired, the power had used every ounce of my energy. I climbed into the only part of the chamber that had not been destroyed and fell instantly to sleep. The last thing I wanted was to face that man. I hated him.

"I do not wish to see him." I murmured against the cool stone of the tub, quietly enjoying the reassuring hand Terif rested on my back.

"Then you do not have to. I only want to take you somewhere to sleep properly." He hesitated when I still did not agree, or look at him, and he let out another sigh. "Please Emrie. The stress you have been through the pass couple of days is beyond unhealthy. Let me take you somewhere else."

I paused another moment, weighing the pros of his suggestion, before deciding they outweighed the cons. I turned away from the side of the tub and gave him a soft nod. The relived sigh that passed his lips did not go unnoticed by me, and he did not hesitate to reach into the washtub and lift me effortlessly.

I let him carry me swiftly, but gently from the destroyed, debris laden room and out into the silent hall. I was too tired to lift my head from his strong shoulder.

"You knew, on the ship back from the Lower Kingdom, you remembered who I was." Our pass conversations flew easily across my mind's eyes. Terif exclaiming the King had once searched for his mate, about him being far older than one could imagine. He had known.

"I was starting to, yes."

"Would you have told me if he had let you?" I whispered softly as he carried me away from the North's destroyed chambers, and the hall entirely. His body tensed, and he did not answer for a few, long seconds, before those gold eyes flashed down to me.

"It was never my place to tell you, and I had faith in North's decisions. Regardless of what you think of him at the moment, he has only done what he thought was necessary to keep you safe."

"He has been with others, Terif." There was no mistaking the absolutely betrayal and hurt in my voice, and I didn't bother trying to hide it. What love could two people ever hold when the original had been so corrupted?

"That was a very long time ago."

"We had been together in the heavens. He knew me-"

"He did not remember you, Emrie."

I was far too tired to hold anything besides hurt in my heart, but that one emotion flared the further our conversation progressed. "I never forgot him, or my feelings for him at least."

"You were asleep under the Mountain for hundreds of years. You did not have the chance to forget." Though his voice was firm and offered little room for argument, it held no anger and he did not snap at me like usual.

"He stopped looking for me."

"No. Never."

I scoffed at that and rolled my eyes despite the water threatening to fall from them once again, but he ignored the sound and continued to carry me through the castle.

"He never stopped searching. He created the Generals to help him, built this place so you would have a home. Even when he forgot he was a god, forgot his true reasoning for being on this realm, forgot why he was searching-he refused to stop, refused to let us stop."

I didn't want to listen anymore, didn't want to hold this conversation anymore. I just wanted to close my eyes, to sleep, to forget. We were silent after that, neither of us bothering to evoke anymore turmoil inside my being. "Why do you not take me to my room?" I asked softly as he descended the grand staircase to a hall I had not seen before.

"North is there."

I did not have a response to that.

The room he took me to was smaller than any other I had stayed in before, but the bed and washroom it held was beyond inviting. "You should wash and change, my lady." He started softly as he sat me down on the edge of the bed. "You will feel better once you do. I will have someone bring food up for you, then you must sleep."

I could only nod as he pulled away and gave me a soft smile. "There is already hot water in the tub and a gown on the counter. I will be back shortly to check on you."

"Terif..." I started as he turned for the door. He paused and glanced back over his shoulder, those golden eyes soft. "Thank you." He smiled, a small one, but smiled still.

"Of course, my lady." He gave me a small bow before leaving quietly out the small door. I sighed as it closed behind him and glanced longingly at the washroom. Yes, a warm bath would do nicely.

-&-

North left me alone for three days, even if it was only because I demanded Terif and Aeyron not let him near. I did not care to hear his excuses, his lies, despite what Terif had said.

He should have told me from the beginning, somehow. To keep me isolated like a prisoner for all those months, to keep me in the dark for so long, was beyond cruel. He was not the man I had fallen in love with.

Terif followed slowly behind me as I walked through the once ice-ridden garden. Snow still covered the ground, though it was much thinner than the winter's. "He wishes to speak with you." The large General spoke softly as I let my fingertips run carefully over the beautiful winter flowers before us.

"I do not care."

He let out one long, tired, drawn out sigh before running a heavy hand down his face. I felt bad for the wolf-born, I truly did. I hadn't really let him leave my side during the past few days and it was starting to exhaust him.

"Emrie, you cannot continue to put the both of you through this. It is only causing more harm than necessary."

"I can, and I will."

"My gods woman." He finally snapped, his golden eyes flashing in the afternoon sun. "You are more of a nuisance than ever." Despite his harsh words, I felt a small smile pull on my lips. Annoying him had become one of my favorite things to do lately.

"Terif, leave."

The brief moment of content I had found myself in completely disappeared as his voice filled the garden. I turned enough to see Terif glance between North and I uncertainly before giving his god a small bow. "I will be just inside... if she needs me." The words were spoken for North alone, though they did offer me some comfort.

The King snapped hard, blue eyes to his original wolf-borne before turning back to me. He did not respond. I stood in stock still silence as I hopelessly watched Terif leave, then turned back to the winter flowers.

"We need to talk."

"I have nothing to say to you."

"Then you will listen."

"There is nothing you can say that I wish to hear."

He let out a dark growl, and I watched him run a heavy hand through his already disheveled hair out of the corner of my eye. "I have given you the space you demanded, against my better judgment. It is time you listen to what I have to say."

I walked away from the winter flowers, and him. Snow began to fall slowly from the sky as I eased down the garden's path, trying to put as much distance between the two of us as possible. Of course he followed.

"Continue to ignore me all you want, but you will listen to me, Emrie." He was only a few steps behind me, and the proximity made the hairs on the back of my neck stand straight. I hurried my pace through the garden.

"We should have talked at the beginning of this whole disaster. Not because some seer and his demons revealed the truth." I should have kept my thoughts to myself, he had done so easily for months. It angered me that I could not control my own.

He was quiet a moment as he still followed barely a few steps behind me, before he let out a small sigh. "It had not been the right time then." I scoffed and rolled my eyes, though I tried to keep the anger at bay by brushing my fingers softly over the dozen flower petals surrounding us. He ignored the gruff noise.

"I could not give you answers when I, myself, had none."

"You had more than I."

He let out another snarl, one that would have normally sent a fearful shiver down my spine. I was too angry and tired for that now. "Emrie, please, stopping walking. I can explain everything if you would just give me the chance."

A strong grip suddenly wrapped around my arm and pulled me gently to a stop. My eyes snapped down to the large hand wrapped tightly around my arm before daring to glance into its owner's face.

I hated the way those blue eyes made me weak. "I have given you a thousand chances, and all you have done is shun me and push me away."

It was hard staying strong, hard making my voice firm when those eyes gazed down at me in a remorse so deep it added onto mine own. But I would not falter, not this time. My whole existence had been a lie, one he has puppeteer-ed nearly the entire time-even in the Heavens.

I had been perfectly content watching the world below from my place in Axion's palace, only stealing hidden glances to the God of the Moon's home. He had persuaded me to fall in love with him. Poked and prodded, and grabbed at my attention in every way possible.

I remembered now, not all of it but more and more kept flying through my mind. Memories that only made the situation ten times worse. He had been the one who wanted more. He was the one ensuring my entire soul completely belonged to him. He knew I loved him-knew I needed him.

And here he was on the Mountain, for hundreds of years, growing numb. Built this glorious castle, created his Generals, and watched as the wolf-borne population grew. He stopped looking for me. Then he slept with others.

Terif's words from the other day were little reprieve to the torment of my mind. Adranus-North-had betrayed me in every possible way. Completely tossed our love away, and left me to rot trapped beneath the Mountain.

"I would never shun you, my little Emrie." His free hand reached up and tried to rest against my cheek, but I flinched away. Those sad blue eyes darkened.

"I am tired, North. And I am done. Please, leave me alone." I had meant to sound strong and firm, but my voice came out as a desperate whisper. I could feel that anger from before simpering beneath the surface, right next to that undeniable hurt. I just wanted him to go away.

I tried to pull away from his grip, but that hand only tightened and pulled me towards him. His bright eyes suddenly flashed, and the blue began to disappear as the remorse from before seeped away to frustration.

"You will listen to what I have to say. Whether you want to or not." There was a dark edge replacing the plea in his voice, one that suggested against disobeying him-but I was in no sort of emotional or mental stability to pay attention.

The more frustrated he grew, the angrier I became. The hurt and pain I had been trying so hard to ignore since the gold-power destroyed his chambers was building like a tidal way in my heart. "No, I will not. Leave me alone." I snapped, if only to hide the water building behind my eyes and tried to jerk away from him again.

"I will not, Emrie. Not until this is settled."

"It is settled. I'm done with this, and I'm done with you. Leave me alone!"

The gold-power had been completely silent since that horrid night, but that did not stop my anger from making me lash out on my own. I pulled uselessly at the grip he had on my arm, even reached up with my free hand to slap at his-but the monstrous man would not budge.

"Leave me alone! Leave me alone!"

"Emerense." He suddenly growled, the sound dark and rather angry as it shook through the entire garden. He held onto me with both hands now, their grip tight on my upper arms as I continued to tug viciously against them. "Stop it." He snarled and used both of those ginormous hands to pull me against him.

Harsh, hot, tears of anger threatened to fall down my cheeks as I lost all meaning of the term lady-like and thrashed against the large man. He held me in that firm grip for what felt like forever, the entire time with me tugging viciously against his hold.

Even as his temper spiked, and he started growling and shouting as well, he refused to let go. The grip never hurt though, no matter how impossible it was to break. I don't know how long my mental breakdown lasted, how long I shouted at him to bugger off and that I never wanted to see him again-but it felt like hours.

It wasn't until my head started to feel light, and my struggling limbs grew weak that I stopped trying to fight him. My knees buckled when my fists fell limply at my sides after beating against his chest with all the strength I held.

Those hard hands slowly pulled me into his chest, and his annoyingly strong arms cradled me against him. I wanted to push him away and run-run from the warmth he made me feel, from the love I would always feel for him. He had cursed me, and it would be my end.

I felt too weak to fight against him again, and my traitorous heart fluttered at the way he held me, at how his lips brushed softly along my forehead-like it did not realize he had completely betrayed it.

North let out a long, tired sigh, one that matched the way I felt as he cradled me tightly to his chest and began to slowly rock us back and forth. I hated it, almost as much as I wished I could hate him.

"I have never stopped searching for you, not for five-hundred years." He started softly, his voice a deep baritone I wanted nothing more than to block from my head.

I wished I could desperately drill my fingers into my ears and never listen to another word, but he held my hands pinned to his chest as if he knew. "Please, North. I do not want to hear it." I begged against his chest, though I knew it was pointless. He refused to leave me be.

"I built this castle for you, so we had a home once this mess was over with. We could not go back to the Heavens, we cannot go back, not permanently. I knew that when I fell, but none of that mattered if I had you."

Liar. His words sounded so sweet, so much like the promises of love he once gave me all those centuries ago in his palace on the moon. I didn't want them to persuade me as they once had so easily before. No matter how weak I was when it came to him.

"I did not lie about the myth of the original wolf-borne. I truly did give a wolf a piece of my soul."

"I remember." I grumbled against him and tried to pull weakly away. He would not let me. He did pause though, if only for a moment.

"Terif told you?"

"Yes." I hissed, the implied 'as you should have' ringing in my tone. He ignored it and continued his story.

"When I fell his mate had just perished. He wished to die himself, but that would never be. He knew when he accepted my gift that he would be forced to live an eternal, immortal, life. He will never die as long as that part of my soul lives within him."

I flinched away when his fingers reached up to run down my hair. His hand hovered in the air, just a hairsbreadth away, before he let it fall to my arm once again. He let out a small sigh.

"He was the one who convinced me to create the Generals. Having six other beings searching would be helpful. You had fallen on the Mountain, I knew you had. I saw the craters, saw the other stars, you had to be here. But I still went to the Lower Kingdom, and further for any kind of indication."

"None of this matters." I grumbled as he paused a moment, my fingers trying to desperately curl into him, though I kept them from doing so. It did not change what happened, it didn't change the fact that he forgot about me.

"I just..." He let out a heavy sigh, and I could just picture those blue eyes flashing in my mind's eye. "I just want you to know everything. I just want you to understand."

"I understand everything just fine. Even a god can forget." I spoke the words with such venom they pained even me. My head began to pound behind my eyes.

"Don't do that, Emrie. Do not shut me out." He pleaded softly into my ear as I tried to pull away from him, his hands tightening in response. "Let me finish, please. If you still want me to leave when I'm done, I will."

I did want him to leave, to disappear somewhere where I would never have to see him again. Lie. But if all it took was a few minutes of listening to gain some peace from the disastrous god, then so be it.

-&-

Shout out to the few of you who had guessed about Terif! #plottwistforwhat