Doe's POV:

The scene before me was pitch black nothingness.

I sat on my knees, arms locked at my sides.

My entire body was locked, I quickly learned, the only thing I could move being my eyes.

Trying to gauge all that I could with those alone, I gained nothing that I hadn't already.

But I heard something. Footsteps approaching at a slow pace.

Calm, confident, almost languid, obviously in no rush to approach what was already laid out for them and unable to move.

The skin on the back of my neck burned under the gaze I could feel, sending a shock of fear throughout my stilled body.

A feeling that was so familiar yet felt oddly foreign in this moment.

Like it had been buried deep just to be ripped right back out of the ground whenever the slightest sign of danger presented itself.

And it got yanked out fast once those steps were directly behind me, cold, slim fingers curling around my shoulders.

That touch alone send a harsh terror racking through my body and choking me to the point where I couldn't fill my lungs

Her touch.

I knew it so well. Too well, in fact.

Enough to where I had learned how to differentiate it from the others I had to come into contact with.

The chill of her skin was uncomparable, freezing my body down to the bone

She let out a satisfied, almost nostalgic sigh as she rounded her way to my front, dragging a claw up my neck and around my jaw the entire way.

My chin finally lifted as the claw pushed me to do so, meeting that golden gaze that pulled the buried fear up even harder.

"There you are," She purred, a confident, malevolent smirk residing on the face I was told I've never had to see again.

I forced a glare to show through the anxiousness biting at every nerve, keeping my eyes glued to hers as she kneeled in front of me.

The hand on my chin shifted, now squeezing the entirety of my jaw with the claws of her thumb and middle finger piercing into my cheeks.

"I've missed you, you know. The little game we play," She spoke the same way she did in order to drag Xander back, forcing my head up more and more until I was stuck looking straight up.

The crushing fact of my neck now being entirely exposed caused my exterior to crack.

I knew what was coming. These dreams had only been ending in one way lately.

But the knowledge of that didn't make the moment any less horrifying.

The helplessness this experience forced down my throat, knowing that truly, the reality wasn't that much different.

I was a human amongst vampires. A prey amongst the world's fiercest predators.

A terrified whimper fought its way through the walls I tried to put up at the feeling of a sharp claw softly dragging itself from the bottom of my chin, down my throat, and stopped at my collar bone.

She was toying with me so effortlessly.

Which caused an inkling to spark in the back of my mind, no, It was a need.

A need to call out in a last-ditch effort for help.

But who did I have? Who would care enough to put a stop to this?

Xander? I didn't have enough hope yet to confidently make that conclusion.

The reality was, even if I wanted to, I couldn't.

The state of my body wouldn't allow it.

"It's a shame, really, that your expiration date is due. But we both know that I enjoyed it while it lasted, and that's what matters in the end."

The words that have been echoing in the back of my mind since she first spoke them filled the space around us, blaring repeatedly in my ear until I squeezed my eyes shut, and fighting uselessly to move away.

Expiration date.

The word itself sent my stomach folding, but I didn't get to know that feeling for long.

Not when her claw returned itself to the bottom of my chin again.

It traced down the same path as before, slicing deep into the skin this time on the way down

~~~

My mind was in a thick haze as I got ready alongside Xander.

It usually was for a while after having such a... restless night's sleep.

It had been a while since I'd started my morning waking up from a nightmare.

I guess in my mind, I believed the absence of her physically right now in my life would have translated, but I was wrong.

She still showed up in my brain like she owned the place, and brought with her that fear that was still lingering through my body.

That, and the phantom chill I could feel on my shoulders, despite the long-sleeved shirt I was wearing.

She wasn't even a constant worry in my mind and yet I couldn't manage to get rid of the prison she'd built around it.

I'd run only so far away before getting dragged right back.

I finished tying my boots, looking up at the vampire who had a very similar problem, but a different circumstance.

As usual, he was failing in controlling that blonde mess he calls hair.

He looked... better today.

That light had returned to his eyes, and he didn't look like he was in any sort of physical pain.

Not like earlier yesterday when I could tell that he was faking it.

...The soup worked then?

With his state of mind noted, I then let myself use him as a distraction, just enough to get these lingering feelings to go away.

"Hair cut, Xander. Hair. Cut." I taunted for what seemed like the millionth time.

I saw the smile take over his lips, yet he kept his eyes on the mirror.

"Now now, hold on just a second," He responded, sounding like he had finally figured something out.

I watched with a raised brow as he side-stepped, reaching over to where I kept my things, and plucked a hair tie from the basket.

He struggled for a moment to wrangle all the strands together until he ended up with a decent-looking half-ponytail. A few that weren't long enough fell to the side of his face, and the rest that was left down just barely brushed his shoulders.

A look I've done for many occasions.

"See? It works and gets it out of my face." He was practically beaming with pride as he stepped out of the bathroom.

I just rolled my eyes, tightening my laces again just to make sure, and stood.

"All I see is you stealing my look and my hair tie," I chastised.

Which earned a quiet chuckle from him while he approached.

"Can I borrow them then, just for today?"

I feigned a disgruntled sigh.

"I suppose," I surrendered.

In all honesty, it was a good look on him. Maybe more than it was on me.

Actually, no. I wouldn't go that far.

"Thank you, I'll repay you one day."

I brushed him off with a quiet 'mhm', seeing him turn to his desk to grab a few last-minute items for the blood collection.

That feeling in my body still hadn't gone away.

The fear had mostly settled into what I wanted it to be, but that phantom chill...

My legs were moving to follow him before I could think about it.

"Can I see your hand?" I found myself requesting, but didn't take it back once I realized.

He paused almost immediately, eyes wide in confusion as he turned his head.

I just needed to double-check. Remind myself that I knew the difference.

The difference between her touch and his, as well as the difference between what was real and what was just residual damages from my nightmares.

"Huh?"

"Your hand," I repeated, extending my right one palm up, bending and straightening my fingers for extra effect, "Give it."

He hesitated, even looking a bit wary as he turned his body.

"Jeez, Xander I'm not about to bite you," I teased as he inched his hand over.

"It's just a weird request coming from you."

He's right, it was, but I needed some reassurance, and I knew that he was a reliable source to get it from.

With this at least.

His hand finally found mine with his pinky against the inside of my thumb, and fingers bending down to my palm.

I squeezed as soon as I got him there, my entire hand keeping his fingers there so that I could assess.

And my answers came quickly with the feel of his skin against mine.

It was still cold, colder than mine at least. Not bone-chillingly so like what I was feeling earlier.

Just enough for it to feel strange. To feel the difference between our species.

I rubbed my jaw and chin with the back of my free hand, eyes keeping themselves on what I was holding until that cursed feeling finally subsided.

I exhaled a silent sigh, just about ready to drop his hand until my now cleared mind had me realizing something.

Not just the temperature difference, but the difference in size.

Now hold on just a minute.

Here I thought that I had trapped his hand, but the tips of my fingers were only partially visible under his.

I mean, the width of this guy's fingers nearly took up all the space of my palm and the height of my own.

No wait, this couldn't be right.

My lips pursed with my deranged determination that my eyes were deceiving me right now, shifting my hand so that mine and his were palm to palm, fingers to fingers.

I feel like I would have noticed this a while ago, noticed how much bigger his hands were.

Our hands had to match up at least a little.

I knew his had to be bigger, but not by that much.

Except they didn't. It was embarrassing even how much they didn't match up.

The tips of my fingers just barely reached the first bend in his.

"What the hell?" I spoke aloud, looking up to see what I could only explain as narrowly controlled levity.

He didn't say anything, probably in fear that he'd lose it if he did.

"Your hands haven't always looked like this," I spoke frankly.

I swear I nearly heard him snort.

"Oh, you didn't know? Vampires can change the size of their hands at will now. It was a new upgrade we got during the last bloodmoon."

I just stared at him with hooded eyes, unamused by his creative fib.

...outwardly.

"Whatever," I pulled my hand away and stomped to the door through the strange embarrassment I was now feeling, "Let's just hurry and get out of here before we're late for real this time."

"Don't you want a jacket?" He called from behind me as I set my hand on the door handle.

Oh come on, he can't just ruin my dramatic exit like that.

I stared down at the handle that I had already partially started turning.

It was too late now, I was committed.

"Nope!"

He was silent for a few seconds, his next words coming out serious.

"Doe, it's like twenty-five degrees out there with snow everywhere and were gonna be there for a few hours. I think you're gonna want more than just that."

I shook my head, deciding that I was apparently rolling with this.

"Nah I'm good. I like the cold anyway." I countered, knowing deep down that he was absolutely right.

But what kind of idiot confidently goes to leave without grabbing a jacket?!

Well, me apparently, but I got caught up in the conversation.

And it was too late now to do so without admitting defeat.

Not that I think Xander cared about that. but I did.

And right now I was really willing to freeze my ass off to prove that I meant it.

Ah shit. Is this what Xander feels like when he traps himself in a lie and has to find a way to work with it?

That seems exhausting, and yet he does it like five at a time.

I can probably manage it just this once.

With my pride that I just now deemed was at stake.

"Doe..." He knew my choice was an idiotic one.

But one I was gonna have to roll with.

'A day in the life on Xander' I'll call this decision.

I opened the door and began stepping out.

"I can't hear you I'm already halfway to your brother's" I sang, leaving the room and leaving him scrambling behind me.