Helena Fox's Point Of View

My nerves are frazzled.

I'm cornered by Gil-sama in a completely desolate hallway. I've no doubt that he has made sure the hallway is empty, because he... he... this is Dark Gil!

"You won't tell Lily-Chan about this little thing, will you, He-le-na-Chan~? it's not often I get found out, so I am a bit impressed. I'll have to keep a proper look on you. Ah~ but I guess I don't have to worry about that, I can get rid of you if I want after all."

He said those words so calmly and confidently like he was determining the fate of a mouse. No, I was definitely been shaking like a little trapped mouse so something like that is expected.

I don't know he found out that I knew about him, but he didn't seem to know about the reincarnation. I couldn't get the image 'Lily' put in my mind out of my head though. If it was Gilbert-sama then... he would definitely do it. He would definitely put me through something like that!

Still, even in this condition I must still struggle to think of a way out. After all, Gilbert-sama would know if I lied.

Wait... why was he asking about Lily? I... Lily and I had never gotten along. I would never tell her... unless...

"You're afraid of Lily?"

I ended up blurting out the question on my mind, but even then I wasn't expecting an answer... I wasn't even expecting a reaction... and yet it was there... the way his eyes widened for a moment and then... it changed... his behavior changed... those eyes aren't sane... it's like life just left them and left only cruelty.

"Oh~ What makes you think that?"

...why would I tell someone looking like they're going to kill me?! I mean that's what that expression meant in the game! No, actually it meant he was angry and would torture you, but that is pretty much the same!

"B-because s-she is terrifying?" I stuttered out while trying to crawl out of the grave I was digging for myself.

Gilbert-sama leaned his head to the side.

"Terrifying?"

He appeared to chew on the answer. I can't get away from him in this long hallway! Please let me go already!

"Certainly. But so fragile. So hard to handle. So hard to make happy too."

His lips curl into a smile.

"But I've no need to do such favors for you, Helena-Chan. Now, let's go, Helena. We will continue this-"

NOOOOO! Definitely not! I run past him towards the window and glance to Milley, my minor wind faerie in the shape of an owl.

Wind blast!

I visualize the spell structure and build it up before setting the release point as my hand.

The window shakes for but a moment before it is blasted open and I jump out.

—-*—-

That was this morning.

I just barely managed to land softly because I'd taken time to lean feather fall since my last confrontation with 'Lily'. I just barely managed to join the group leaving the academy to get away from Gilbert, and now I'm trapped with 'Lily' instead!

Not just that, but I have to watch the nerve wrecking scene of 'Lily' being exposed as a woman. I don't know what to think anymore.

The only thing even remotely amusing is to watch the soldiers, and how awkward 'Lily's' conversations with them are... if she's tired then she'll leave me alone, right?

At least I get the chance to help Jesmaine... the only light in what seems like a never ending nightmare. I want to go back...

I glance down at the wool and needle I managed to bring with me. If nothing else I still have this... it relieves stress! I'm felting cat ears on a hair band... why? Imagining people with cat ears is relaxing. Sadly I won't have a model.

I think they're pretty nice... but using them would... really be weird in this world. Still, we are in a fantasy world, is a cat boy too much?!

"What is that?"

...NOT YOU! You may be dressed as a boy but you don't count! God, my heart nearly stopped at 'Lily's' surprise attack.

"Cat ears?" She asks again and kneels down next to me with... fascination...

"Yes... it's a hair band..." I reply hesitantly and place them on top of my head. I only recall seeing 'Lily' being angry, cruel, creepy or fake polite... so... her pure an innocent fascination with the hairband is... creepy...

"Can you make a pair for me?"

Hah? Her eyes are sparkling... why are her eyes sparkling?! You're a samurai! No, wait... samurai did make those weird helmets... no... I'm probably overthinking things...

".....okay..."

I'll agree hesitantly. Just, calm down and turn back to normal...

I continue felting for a bit, but interestingly 'Lily' doesn't move on.

Her water fairy is playing with Millie. At least, I think they are. Watching a fish chase around an owl is an odd sight... Millie is still hidden though, but for some reason 'Lily' keeps her fairy visible, most of the time. I've seen her hide it as a little ball of ice too. I think in particular around the knight students... other than now...

Still... I would have expected someone to be near her, but she's alone... no, the guys are just watching from a distance. Politely letting the girls talk perhaps? ...it's not like I'll be able to talk with Lily. She would never answer... but... she looks quite peaceful right now... she's even fiddling with a half mask in her hands and comparing it to the ears I'm making...

"Lily..."

I hesitate for a moment, but decide to breach a hard subject that we can both relate to:

"Uhm... how did you die?"

Lily freezes up for a moment, and her pleasant atmosphere disappears like snow in the sun.

"I was poisoned... and you?"

... of cour- wait, she actually answered? I stop poking the wool for a moment, but she's focused on it like a cat... I continue, though a bit slower... my death... I hesitate for a moment, but compared to 'Lily's' it's probably laughable...

"I tripped down a long flight of stairs..."

Lily raises an eyebrow as she looks up at me... see... She's not taking me seriously at all.

"I... I had been fighting with my boyfriend because he was moving away... and I regretted it so I rushed down the stairs to get to him before he left... I ended up falling into someone on the way down, but everything just went black."

Lily stared at me for a while and then... her eyes softened a bit.

"So you regret not making up with him."

It wasn't a question. Just a short phrase that makes a bitter taste fill my mouth and makes my chest tighten.

"There's... nothing to do about that know..." I whisper back and let my gaze drift to the side while biting my lip.

"I won't be able to make up with him no matter how many times I pray... besides... I died. I cannot go back to that place..."

I squeeze the hairband a bit.

"Being sad won't change a thing..."

An awkward silence spreads between us for a while, and yet Lily's answer surprises me.

"Slipping away from the realm of judgement is no small feat. You may easily have followed his soul here to find peace, if making up with him is indeed your regret."

She gives me false hope, and I feel anger fill my chest... at least until I look back at her. A lifeless and mournful expression covers her face like a veil.

"What is your last regret?" I ask instead as the anger dissipates...

"I wish I knew," she replies and stands up. When she leaves there is no hint of the terrifying figure that made me tremble and haunted my nightmares...

A flask appears by the corners of my eyes and when I look up a second year is holding out water for me with hints of compassion in his eyes. He observes me as I get a quiet drink from the flask...

My nerves must have been more frazzled than I thought they were... for the tense feeling in my chest fades a bit. I peer up at him quietly and note a humanoid small fairy having made itself visible and tries to pet Millie. The winds around them swirl for a moment.

"...we are here if you need someone to talk to. Going to war is difficult," he says quietly. Even with a bit of hesitance. He misunderstood the context... but... I'm kind of happy I'm not all alone right now. Unlike Lily I can... I will swallow my pride and accept his worry.

I catch a glance of one of the knights moving to Lily with hasty steps. I cannot help but to think for a moment that Lily would have been a perfect hidden character. She would be pretty impossible to get through...

Still... perhaps Gilbert-sama was right... perhaps... just maybe, she is weaker than I thought.