I woke up covered in a mass amount of sweat, feeling an unconformable stickiness under my arms and around my neck. I turned over on my side and saw that it a little after 3 a.m. Ever since my release date gone wrong in Mr. Patry's office I haven't slept a full night. Some nights are so strange that when I wake up I have no idea where I am. It always takes a few minutes before reality tells me that I'l' be here another four years. Tonight my mind was exhausted but my body was awake and there was absolutely nothing I could do about it.

I sighed heavily before I got up to rearrange my bed. Putting my pillow at the opposite end of the bed and shifting my covers to the other side so the coolness would soothe me, I collapsed back onto the bed to attempt to return to my sleep. This was a trick my mom taught me during the scorchingly humid summers in Indiana. Fearful of another bad dream, I kept my mind focused on reiterating everything I have to do tomorrow; clean, read, iron. Clean, read, iron. Clean, read, iron.

"Hello?" I wondered down my street, reminiscing in the bright cherry trees that were around almost every corner.

I approached my yellow house, opening the wooden fenced gate and noticing that mom had planted her red tulips in the front yard like she did every season. I glanced behind to the backyard and saw that my dog Sammy was sitting in the grass, his bat-like ears were flopping with every turn he made. I called his name but he didn't notice me. I walked to the font porch and opened the door, coming inside and for some reason remembering to remove my shoes. I saw mom and dad sitting at the dining-room table just to the left of the staircase where they were enjoying breakfast. Their smiles and happiness sent a shiver through my body.

"I'm home." I said, trying to capture their attention.

"Do we know you?" My dad spoke plainly.

"You weren't there..." That seemed to be the only words that would come from me. "Why weren't you guys there?"

I stopped to look at everything around me; the vanity containing my knickknacks were empty, my coats and shoes were no longer by the front door, and my presence was absent in every photo. This wasn't my home anymore.

"We don't know who you are." My mother stood behind my father and placed her hands on his shoulders.

"You...You don't know who I am?" I put my hand over my mouth to hide my gasp but I noticed that it was fading away.

My body was disappearing in a sandlike breeze. Mom and dad went back to their conversation while happily eating their breakfast. I started to scream as I faded away to get their attention but they never even noticed.

My unplanned scream in my dream woke me up, almost causing me to fall out of my bed. My mind was confused as to whether there were tears or sweat on my face but I soon realized that it was both. I tried to pull myself together to reach my desk for the box of tissues sitting near my books but I was staggering too much and I knocked over my desk chair.

"Naomi what the hell are you doing in here?" Mr. Patry barged in, his expression softened when he saw the tears in my eyes. "Are you alright?"

"I'm fine, I just need a tissue." Usually I would burst down in tears but now was definitely not the time to draw attention from the Administrators.

"Naomi you're crying." He came inside and closed my door, turning on the lights which only intensified the burn in my eyes. "What's wrong?"

"Just had a bad dream is all." I wiped away the wetness on my cheeks and blew my nose.

"Let's have a talk about that then," He put his hand on my shoulder to guide me to my bed. "I'm sure you'll feel much better if you talk about it."

He took my desk chair and sat down across from me, resting his elbows on his knees and clasping his hands forward. I had his full attention now, I could finally voice my dream to him but I had absolutely nothing to say.

"I can't get rid of this pain." I cried, he handed me another tissue that I drenched within a matter of seconds. "I don't know if I can face another day like this."

"What happened in your dream?"

"I found my house and my parents but they...they didn't know who I was. My house had nothing of me inside of it." I hugged both my arms as they were becoming cold with goosebumps.

"Your mind is finally processing the change," he nodded his head. "but the good news is that you can finally take the first steps for moving forward."

I know he meant well, and believe me if he couldn't spank me then I would definitely tell him to go to hell. Even though that wouldn't make my feel better anyhow.

"Where is forward? Where do I go from here? I'm stuck here at Braxton with nothing..."

"The best thing you can do right now is work on yourself." He took my hand and patted it, unsuccessfully attempting to stop my crying.

"My self? What does that mean?"

"It means you should dedicate your attention and time to being the best you that you can be. I know this is very hard for you because you feel helpless, you have no control in this right now. But you have so much potential Naomi, you're a very bright young lady and if you utilize this well then you can become so independent that you'll have complete control of you life."

I think I understand what he means but it sounds very lonely. I can't believe I'm saying this but I feel really bad for Mr. Davis. Even though it was entirely his decision, he was dumped with me and, much like myself, there wasn't anything he could do about it. He's struggling between keeping the Academy in order and trying to raise a fourteen-year-old stranger. Looks like neither of us were prepared for the major change that happened four months ago.

"I pray someone, something will come to take away the pain. I know Mr. Davis can if you let him, he's such a wonderful person."

"Yeah I know," I wiped my nose and looked over my shoulder at my pillow. "Mr. Patry, will you stay with me for a while and pretend it's all alright?"

"Sure honey."

I crawled back into bed and he turned the lights off for me. Reassuming his seat in my desk chair, I closed my eyes and felt much better that I wasn't alone tonight. I'm sure he won't stay long because he's on duty tonight, but it means so much that he's willing to stay here with me.

________________________________________________________

Last night was still a blur spinning around in my head. Even with Mr. Patry there, I continuously woke up three more times afterwards but when I fell asleep, I slept in until noon. Right now I'm trying my best to clean my room and get ahead of schedule so neither of the Administrators would be able to tell that I slept so late. There was still another hour before my laundry would be finished and then I had to make sure it was properly ironed before I could even pick up my book again. It was my only escape from this harsh reality.

"Naomi?" Mr. Davis knocked on my door, despite it being slightly cracked opened.

"Yes sir?" I asked, dropping my rag and spray bottle down on my desk.

"Mr. Patry told me about last night," He came inside and shut the door, no doubt observing everything that I was doing to make sure I hadn't lost my mind. "I'm here to see if there's something you need or if there is something you want to talk about." His expression was soft.

Mr. Davis, despite being utterly horrifying in a mean dad sort of way, always spoke with such sincerity. I definitely didn't want to relive last night because I know it would only increase the uncomfortableness that I was feeling. Even before coming to the Academy, I always hated discussing my feelings or even emotions in general with anyone. So as much as I wanted to tell Mr. Davis about my dream I figure it's better to not since Mr. Patry covered it.

"No thank you, I'm okay." I leaned against my window ceil and crossed my arms.

He narrowed his eyes at me, attempting to get me to squeal but there was nothing he could do that would change my mind right now. I shrugged my shoulders and shot him a small smile, trying to convince him that I was okay.

"Alright then, but I want to talk to you about something." He motioned to my desk chair for me to have a seat.

Oh God, please don't let this be another lecture. I went and took the seat like he told me to but I grabbed the rag on the desk so I would have something in my hands.

"I've been considering a way for you and I to spend more time together," he glanced above my desk at my bookshelf. "and I think I've found something that we'll both enjoy."

"And what's that?" I asked while wrapping the rag around my hand, trying to hide my nervousness for his announcement.

"You and I will have our own private book club." He smiled.

A book club? With Mr. Davis? That actually doesn't sound as terrifying as I was expecting. I mean, I have been reading a lot lately and unfortunately none of my friends are into the practice as much as I am.

"I've noticed that you love to read, I mean your nose is always buried in a book." He laughed which inadvertently caused me to smile. "I love reading myself so I think a book club will be good for you."

"Just for me?" I don't want him to do this just for me.

"For us, is what I meant. Book clubs offer great benefits such as a decrease in stress, it gives you motivation to accomplish your goals, and it improves your writing and reading skills while having the added benefit of gaining new perspectives." He spoke confidently, he always did.

"This actually sounds great." I smiled. Ironically, the more and more he described it the more and more I loved it.

"What book are you currently reading?" He glanced once more at my book shelf.

"Well I just started Bless Me, Ultima I haven't made it past the introduction." (Fun fact, I actually am reading this book right now and I highly recommend it! - K.A.)

"Good, I'll order mine immediately and begin reading. How about we both read one chapter per week and meet on Fridays after dinner to discuss it?"

"That's perfect!" I reached above me to my shelf, grabbing the book and squeezing it tightly in excitement.

"I'm glad you're excited." His eyes crinkled as the upturn corners of his mouth emerged.

Today was already Sunday so I better make sure all my chores are finished if I'm going to make the chapter deadline for Friday. My heart was actually pounding with exhilaration, this was honestly the most exciting thing I've done in months and it was all because of Mr. Davis. I couldn't stop staring at his smile because there was so much reassurance and confidence in it that things were going to get much better.