Krill emerged from his restful trance to the sound of cursing. Violent, aggressive cursing followed by the sound of ruckus laughter. He had been floating absently down the hallways of the ship suspended in his restful trance allowing the natural air currents of the ship to carry him from one end to the other. He was close to the crew's sleeping quarters.

With a quick hiss, he released the hydrogen from its sack finally making contact with the cold metal floor to scuttle off down the hallway.

He made it to the crew's quarters just in time to see Petty Officer Ramirez stumbling from bed face and right hand covered in shaving cream. The additional crew sleeping in the room sat on their beds giggling and jeering as the man cursed and stumbled towards the bathroom.

Towards the door Airman Young called, "APRIL FOOLS!"

The entire room went suddenly quiet. Expressions of amused laughter narrowed to deep expressions of distrust and paranoia. A few of the crewmen began glancing under their beds. One of the men even turned over his boot and shook it onto the floor as if he expected to find something there.

Krill didn't like the look of that, and he didn't like the sound of that either. He knew what a fool was, but he had no idea what an April was. It didn't translate, so he couldn't be sure what was going on. Not wanting any part in this, rill moved on down the hallway just in time to hear screaming from the female quarters of the ship.

Female humans were more likely to use sonic attacks than their male counterparts, plus they were better at it, though this one sounded more like a warning call than an attack, so he hurried over peering in to find Chief Warrant Officer McKay standing in a shower of glitter hands held out to her sides. Her uniform was absolutely covered in the tiny shimmering flakes all of which seemed to have fallen from her cap which she now removed in a glittery waterfall of horror.

"I am NEVER going to be able to get rid of this.... You A**holes." Though she seemed livid, the anger on her face quickly melted away, and she began racing around the room rolling on the other women's' beds and hugging anyone she could make contact with. The screaming and laughing must have echoed down the hallway to the men's quarters, and now they were cautiously peering out from their rooms testing the ground before them with tentative steps.

One of the men peered in at the glittery carnage and laughed in delight, "Glitter bomb." He looked down at krill, "Better hunker in in prepare for war, this is going to get ugly."

Krill stared up at the crewman in confusion, "Why?"

"Why my fine quadruped today is April fools, the day we humans use as an excuse to play mean jokes on each other and laugh."

That was not exactly a good explanation for Krill, but the humans had already moved on before he could ask further questions, but he watched as the crew slowly moved up the corridor and towards the captain's quarters. Trying the door handle, they found it to be locked.

The captain's voice rose up on the other side of the door, "Not this year. No one waking me up with a chainsaw this year. That is not how this day begins."

The crew looed slightly miffed, but shrugged it off.

On the sly, Krill thought he caught one of the crewwomen grinning evilly behind someone's back.

A sudden loud clatter from the captain's quarters heralded another string of cursing and a couple of loud thumping noises. The door hissed open and the captain stumbled against the frame, "Which one of you took the time to make a PERFECT replica of my leg with FOAM and then swamp if for my real one..... Who the hell does that!" In his other hand, he brandished a crumbled looking bionic leg. While the undamaged parts looked impressively like the real thing, the breaks clearly showed its truth. "This is!... Amazing actually really talented, but also its MEAN it steal from the crippled."

No one seemed all that ashamed, not even when no one came forward to return the leg, and the captain was forced to hop his way down the hallway between bouts of cursing and laughing.

In fact, they all laughed.

Krill was very scared at what this day was to bring.

He honestly couldn't have known that April fools generally doesn't get this intense with most humans, but the crew of this particular ship had the unfortunate circumstance of being full of pranksters and misfits. It probably shouldn't have happened that way, but sometimes the universe rolls an unusually exceptional hand.

When they finally stumbled onto the bridge past the trip wires and motion sensors, they found the entire room plastered with stick on googly eyes. Sizes on the googly eyes ranged from smaller than a fingernail to about the size of the average person's head. Krill found the effect to be rather disconcerting, though it gave the ship a rather inebriated expression of lopsided misfortune.

The Captain seemed impressed, that was until he tried to sit down on the command chair. Someone had apparently gone in and loosened the bolts, which held the chair in place. Under the captain's weight, the chair subsequently collapsed and spilled him onto the floor. The rest of the crew found that mightily entertaining until a few unfortunate crew members learned that the same trickster hadn't simply targeted the captain.

Those chairs that had not been unbolted from the ground had air horns and canisters of silly-string locked into their springs. Krill was honestly afraid to move assuming a bucket of glue or pant would be dumped down on his head, or, somehow, he might step into a bear trap.

The captain still didn't have his leg back, and seemed to be growing rather frustrated with his inability to move around properly. The rest of the crew seemed about 0% sorry for him laughing at his inconvenience.

But it didn't end there, oh if only it had.

Someone had plastered clear tape over all the toilets and urinals causing at least two crewmembers to pee on themselves and at least four more to make a mess all over the floor. The captain ended up calling one of the younger airmen into the room, and in his rush, the poor boy missed the plastic wrap tied across the sliding door at about face level. He ran into the wrap, and the door closed behind him trapping him by his face against the door, while the rest of the crew laughed.

Someone somewhere tampered with the crew's food, and the three crewmembers who had completely forgotten what day it was ended up with lower GI involvement, and at least half a day in the bathroom until Krill came to their aid with a neutralizing agent.

He honesty felt as if he was in a war zone slipping from one room to the next treating minor injuries and poisonings all the while attempting to dodge enemy attacks as the pranking grew in escalation.

Three humans, turned themselves various shades of neon colors when it was determined that the shower heads had been tampered with. The captain claimed responsibility for that one and additional responsibility when two dozen more crewmen had their hands changed color when trying to wash their hands.

Multicolored, and paranoid, the humans moved their way around the ship looking for the rest of the pranks, all while watching the captain as he went hunting for his leg. At this point he had appropriated two younger crewmen to help him as he walked.

Krill stayed at the very back of the group mistrusting every sound and doorknob they came into contact with.

One of the younger women was picked to check the next door, a cleaning closet, and as it opened, a thousand tiny black figures spilled from the door and onto the ground landing in her hair and on her uniform tiny legs splayed outwards.

The scream she let off could have shattered glass, and she danced away screaming and batting at her hair. She stopped once she realized the tiny black bodies weren't moving, in grudging relief when she learned that they were only plastic.

The captain received a punch on the arm when he took credit for that one.

Similar pranks included rubber snakes tied by wire to cupboards and drawers.

Krill was forced to return to the medical bay for more minor-injury supplies, and was just leaving through the hatch when a low growl stopped him in his tracks. Trembling terribly, he turned and was confronted by a massive reptilian head mouth lined with huge glittering teeth. The high pitch shrill he let off would have deafened anyone were it within normal hearing range. He dropped the medical supplies screaming and running as the creature chased after him massive predatory head swinging and roaring.

He was going to die.

And then one of the crewmen stepped into his path elegantly clothes lining the raptor to the floor. A foot flew free from the raptor shoe, and Krill in his relief found a human encased inside the rubberized costume.

If he had a heart he would have had a heart attack, but there might still be a possibility of him having a stroke.

He still wasn't sure that he wasn't going to die. There was a very real possibility that that could still happen. No doubt in his mind.

The engine room was the last place to look. The captain doubted they fouled find anything serious in there, since the room was connected directly to the warp-core chamber, and no one should be dumb enough to mess around near the warp core.

He was partially correct.

They found the captain's leg, and the captain's dog.

They found Waffles, poor girl, sitting in the center of the room. The light tan of her fur had been died a bubblegum pink and her usual black collar had been replaced by a glittery bedazzled harness. Whoever had put her here hadn't been a terrible person and left food and water for her.

With big mournful eyes she looked up at her captain head low tail wagging piteously sitting as she was above his bionic leg, which had been covered in zip ties.

"Hey girl." He said, "What have they don't to you, those terrible people."

She seemed happy upon seeing him and perked up from her mournful state once she realized she wasn't in trouble.

"Turned my dog pink." The captain grumbled in annoyance as he examined the dog's fur.

The expression he gave the bionic leg was not dissimilar to the dog's mournful expression, "That will take forever to remove.

***

Things died down towards nightfall, and while the captain's dog was still pink, he had at least released his leg from the zip ties, and was back to moving around the ship on his own power.

Krill was finally coming down from his stress high.

One of these days he was just going to drop dead, and he almost did walking into his office to find someone had plastered pictures of ballerinas all around the room. Everyone knew that they freaked him out, and apparently they thought it would be funny to continue the growth of his potential aneurysm

Krill wasn't sure the real point of this, "Holiday or Tradition" the humans seemed to think it was downright hilarious, but some of it was pretty mean intended to scare or even hurt the other humans. No one seemed to mind too greatly, and most of them admitted to enjoying the day congratulating others on proper prank execution.

Chief Warrant Officer McKay was still shedding glitter, and admitted doubts that she would ever fully rid herself.

Krill wasn't totally sure what glitter was, but he definitely hoped the humans wouldn't realize its potential application for bio warfare. If glitter got everywhere than what would stop someone from using it as a delivery system for terror.

The thought made him shiver.