— ᴀ.s.

I was battling with myself over that question for some time now. The way he looked at me during my whole stay in Italy, the way he would talk to me. He seemed different around me, he would be so calm and gentle. It was like he was scared that I would break if he rise his ton or if he touches me.

I'm not gonna lie when he pulled me in his chest I was shocked but his reason for that made me laugh. 'Does he cares?'

When the shock wore off and I realized our situation butterflies started to fly in my stomach. And my heart started to beat wildly in my chest at how close we were.

I could smell his cologne on a shirt he was wearing and in a weird way that calmed my racing heart. I even closed my eyes for a second letting myself lean into him on which he tightened his hold on me.

In answer to my question I felt him froze. 'Weird.' I loosened my hold on the back of his shirt looking at his face for any kind of response but his eyes were directed in front of him. He seemed like he zoned out like he was thinking hard.

"Xavier." I called him wanting to get his attention. Blinking a couple of times he lowered his eyes on mine and locked our gazes. Slowly he brought his hand on my cheek and gently wiped off the tears that were a moment earlier flowing over them.

"I didn't want to scare you away, but I see that that didn't lead me nowhere. So all that included, I think we should talk." He said flicking his eyes over my face.

"Do you have a lot of things to do? Do you need help?" He asked nodding his head towards onions on the dashboard. I quickly shook my head "No, I'm good. I can make salad later."

"Okay let's talk then." He said unwrapping his arms from me. I couldn't suppress a disappointment that fell over me as coldness wrapped around me instead of his arms.

"Come here, principino." Xavier said picking Emiliano in his arms. "Let's sit." He added as he gently grabbed my hand and lead us into the living room.

"You are scaring me. What is happening?" I breathed out and he quickly shook his head as he put Emiliano down on the couch.

"You don't need to be scared. It's nothing bad. Well.. how in which hand.." he trailed off making me frown.

"Hmm, how should I start...umm.." he started but I cut him by placing a hand on his and giving it a reassuring squeeze.

"It would be good if you start from the beginning. Like how did we met and then rest." I said with a smile which he gladly returned.

"You are right. Well, umm we met a year ago when you first arrived in New York. A day after you arrived you had a job interview-" he started but I cut him off once again. "Yeah, I didn't get a job."

"Exactly, we met... stumbled into each other in front of a coffee shop. That was after your job interview. Then, umm.. let say that we fell into a conversation and you told me that you are in the need of a job, which I offer to you not long after."

"You offer me a job? But if I'm not mistaking Daniel told me that I was working as a nanny." I exclaimed in confusion 'Why Daniel didn't tell me any of this?'

"Yeah, I offered you a job as a nanny for Emiliano." He said looking at the little boy playing on the floor in front of us. "He was only two months old when you started to work for me."

"So I was working for you? Why didn't you tell me that when we were in Italy? Or why Daniel didn't tell me anything about it?"

"That's not the whole story, but the reason for not telling you is.." sighing he turned to look at me "I didn't want to scare you. At the wedding, I could see how tense you were for having your parents by your side. And before you say anything, yes I know about what they put you through. You told me yourself about that. About everything. And I simply didn't want to add on your anxiety and fear and... I just didn't want to make you uncomfortable."

"Well, maybe Daniel could tell me about it earl-" he cut me off by shaking his head and looking at me softly.

"No, he couldn't. He didn't know." He said making me frown "He only find out when you guys were in Italy. That's when I told him about everything."

"Can you tell me more about it? Why didn't I tell him? I usually tell him everything." I questioned.

"Of course I can. I don't know really the whole story but I will tell you what you told me and what the guys told me. When you were moving to New York guys weren't happy, especially Daniel. He was scared to let you alone that far away from him and whatnot. So you guys made a deal, if you find and get a job you can stay, and if not you need to come back home."

"I didn't get a job so you give me one?" "Exactly, when we met and after we spoke I give you a job which 'secured' your stay there. However, you didn't tell Daniel that you work for me but for a woman who required a babysitter. And I didn't even know at a start that you know Matteo or Angelo, just after a couple of months when he came to visit me you guys met."

"Okay, but I still don't understand myself why didn't I tell him and let him know that I work for you..." I trailed off unsure of my own actions.

"Well, if you told him that you work for a single father he would drag you back home." He said making me snap my eyes at him "Look at it from his perspective his little sister moved far away from him. A place where she isn't under his protection. Normally, he would be scared for you without knowing me. So you chose to lie to him, a little at the beginning.. and with the time that lie kind of grew."

"In context, I lied to him so I could stay in New York." I exclaimed making him nod.

"Exactly. We didn't.. I mean you didn't tell him about me or your job or us.." he trailed off looking at my reaction.

My confusion only grew as I took his words in. 'Us? What does he mean, us? Does he- Oh shit.' My eyes widened as I looked at him. "Us?"

"Si, we, umm.. we were together." He whispered like he was scared to say it louder. His words made me still for a moment. 'We were together? Like together?'

"Together?" I croaked out which made him slid closer to me and take my hand in his, giving it a reassuring squeeze.



"Si, we were together." "Were? Did we, umm.. di-did we broke up?" I asked without even realizing that I opened my mouth.

His eyes flicked over my face making blush rose on my cheeks, he bit his lip and shook his head side to side slowly. "No. We didn't break up."

"What happened then?" I asked timidly tilting my head to the side a little. "You disappeared." "Disappeared?"

"Yeah, the day you had that accident. That's the day you disappeared. We thought that you went missing, we searched everywhere for you but we couldn't find you. No one of us knew that you had an accident and we didn't call Daniel... we didn't want to worry him. You.. yo-you were missing for over three months and then we met at Lorenzo's wedding."

"Alright.." I looked around the room letting everything he said settle down. 'Okay, now some things have sense.'

After some moments of silence while which I looked down at the little boy on the floor playing with his toy. During the whole time, I could feel Xavier's gaze on me.

Taking deep breath I turned to him "What was a reason for my disappearance?" I asked which took him of guard becouse his eyes widened a bit and he started to shifted uncomfortably.