Selfish or True



My heart raced as I looked at his lustful smile. He was a predator a merciful monster. He was a predator with a plan. He watched my mother and he watched me grow. I was only fourteen when he pulled me into this life. I was only a child and yet he still stole everything.

"no." I was hardly able to whisper beneath my breath. "what?" He growled loudly ripping my hair back with his fist. "Speak louder." He spat out raising his hand to backhand me.

"No."

He sighed putting his hand in his pockets. Walking like a lion stalking its way to his prey. "very well, I was going to be generous and let you stand by my side. But it would seem you would rather let your family's lives hang on a single thread." He smirked before sitting in his seat. "I will reoffer the deal if you are successful but if you don't... well." He shook his head chuckling dryly. "you will know you had your chance."

I had my chance.

"was that all you wanted to discuss with me, boss?" I wanted to get out of this room fast. The burning pain in my lungs felt like my body was soaring with fire. "No, it wasn't, I have a little mission for you and your sidekick to do tonight." My head raced to object and I had to bite my tongue as I dropped my eyebrows.

"There is a certain deal tonight between your father and a man called Kai wang. He is a businessman who is looking to expand his company. But he is only a little worthless soul who owes me a lot of money." I listened to the information carefully. My heart raced as I heard my father's name. I thought he was in Mexico doing work but I guess he had to come home for a deal. I scrolled through the background information letting every single detail sink in. Kai wang was a son from one of the most successful richest families in all of China. His parents are respected by all and have done a lot of charity work. He has two younger brothers and a little sister. A pain forced it's way into my chest as I now felt like I was breaking apart a family. He was incredibly spoilt and had a large history of party scandals and drub abuse. But did he deserve death? He was my brother's age and I couldn't even imagine what I would do if something happened to them.

"What did you want me to do?" My chair was spun around and I looked directly into Tony's dark brown eyes.

"you are going to kill him." I ignored all of my thoughts and had to sink any humanity I had. "now please excuse yourself and consider tonight a break from your little ghostly manhunt." I folded my hands into fists as I sunk myself into anguish. He knew that I hadn't found anything about Blaze. He probably also knew I was up through day and night tearing myself apart trying to find this Blaze.

He wanted me to suffer.

I shuffled my mask back on sliding my hood up to cover the rest of my face and hair. "what do you want me to do with his body?" His eyes brightened with joy like a child does on a Christmas morning.

"I want it in my office tomorrow morning so I can give his head to the family for a little gift."

He was truly a monster.

Jace's head whipped forward to me as he saw me walking out of the room. He sighed with relief and we both walked out of the building with the aspiration to be free.

"so, what did he say?" He asked as we both were now on our back to my school. I tried to get dressed without thinking too much. I didn't know what to tell him. He wanted me to be his wife? He was willing to cancel everything if I accepted his offer but instead, I let my dignity take over and chose the selfish option. I am letting my families life's rest in the palms of the most demonic monster.

I had my chance.

"Ange?" I broke my thoughts looking at him surprised. "what did he say." I sighed heavily and climbed over to the front seat. "he.." he wanted me to become his. "he has a mission for us tonight."

"WHAT!" Jace's loud voice filled the car's silence. He was upset and angry. We both were we both had been working so hard trying to find Blaze. But it was as if Boss wanted us to fail. "what is it and who?" He sucked in his breath as he swore under his breath.

"His name is Kai wang, 22, 5'11, oldest of four children, has had records of drug abuse and party scandals." I rolled my eyes. "why does the boss want to kill him?"

"he owes the boss some long-overdue money." I shrugged as I read aloud more information. "he is going to be at the Garcia Green night club tonight."

"that's one of your family's clubs?!" Jace said shocked giving me a weird look. "I know... my dad is going to be there. He is doing a deal with Kai wang the dipshit himself." The car filled with silence as soon as the words flooded out of my mouth. "ok well I will get the guns and the equipment ready. We will meet at the lamp post." I nodded and kissed him on his cheek as I got out of the car with my black bag.

"Have fun running from the cops." I teased lightly cocking an eyebrow waiting to hear his objection. "have a blast at school darling don't get into toooo much trouble." Rolling my eyes I flipped him off as I climbed over the school gate.

For the rest of the day, I returned to my last classes having no trouble with anybody. The only bad thing about returning to class was that I had art with the twins. They both death stared me the whole lesson and I didn't have to figure it out that they have already ratted me out. I muffle a groan as I can only imagine mammas and my brother's upcoming lecture. To them the oh so amazing twins are innocent and delicate. So every freaking person has to treat them like delicate little flowers.

Delicate my ass those trolls have an innocence of a porn star but my family don't see that. Sometimes I think about the time when I was a child. I loved sneaking off to see my father training the boys. As a little girl, I tried to mimic the moves the best I could. I hoped that maybe if I showed papa he would be proud of me. He had the opposite reaction and he even forbid me to train because that would only 'endanger' me. The only times I was allowed was once a month when all the males of the entire family would teach the girls self-defence. I tried to get papa to teach me more but it was like trying to get a fish to breathe out of water. Sometimes Uncle Louis would take me to the shooting range or train me in secret. It is a reason why he is my favourite uncle.

Henry smiled at me as he saw me walk out of the school and I quickly waved back before hopping into my car. I threw my bags in the back of the car and drove home. My lungs were still burning and it felt as if his hands were still around my throat. I needed my inhaler but I didn't want it. I didn't want to be weak, I wanted to be strong. Nothing in my life allows me to be strong. I was born the youngest mafia princess with crap lungs. I was made to be sheltered and protected. I was a little girl full of hope and desperation to be free and strong.

I was a flightless bird who only wanted to fly.

He saw that and took it.

The fourteen-year-old girl was lost among a crowd of thousands. She was lost and her family had lost her. It was her first time being alone and she always thought that when she would be alone and free she would love it. But she hated it, she wanted her family back. she wanted to be in her mother's arms again. She wanted to feel her father's love and protection. She wanted to be with her teasing overbearing and protective brothers. She started to run frantically through the crowds shouting for her parents and brothers. But no one found her.

She was a lost princess.

The sun soared down on her skin making her shaky hands shake more frantically. Millions of horrific thoughts pondered through her mind and just as her hope was forgotten. A large hand grabbed her small shoulder making her sigh with relief. But as soon she turned her heart was immediately filled with horror.

The man was older and his hair was grey as his fair skin was filled with wrinkles. His eyes were dark, darker than her oldest uncles eyes. His eyes held lots of emotions and the only one what terrified her the most was the desperation. His eyes hid away the darkest depths of evil and she knew this just by looking at him. Little did she know that the desperation he held was meant to take everything away.

"Hello, little angel are you ok? are you lost?" The little girl sighed with relief thinking that the smiling man was probably just trying to help her.

"Yes, I can't find my parents or brothers."

She knew it was childish for a fourteen-year-old but she had never been alone from her family before. And she can quickly say that she will never leave her family's side again.

"It's ok, I can show you, my angel"

I had so many changes in my life that I didn't take. I could have said no and ran away. I could have told my parents from the moment the encounter happened. I could have jumped out of the van. I could have screamed. Fear is something that is inside all of us. It is something that laces through our minds. The only thing you can do Is hope that it won't corrupt you. If I had only pushed my fear aside and not only looked out for myself. I wouldn't have to worry about my family's life anymore. I wouldn't have to worry about Jace. The only thing I would have worried about was my own pitiful life. I was selfish. Ungrateful and a coward. I will now always be reminded every day for six months that I had my chance. And it's only because I didn't want to be a wife. my life wouldn't have been perfect it would have been hard but my family and Jace would be safe.

And You had your chance.







(this is pretty much how I imagine her to look like as sparrow but with a black eye mask. :) )