LEERA POV

He stepped by my side with that delivilish smirk playing on his face.

"25th May 2019. It was that night right?" His voice deep and cold. My eyes themselves trailed down on the floor.

"When I caught you red handed with that sick bastard Levi?" He cackled up wickedly. My eyes on their own slowly closed and I felt a tear slid down my cheek.

"You never loved me right? You used me for my money and fame? Or should a say for the slut you are you couldn't hold yourself from me?" His words pierced through my heart bit by bit, Tearing everything inside me apart.

"How you always played that innocent, saint role infront of me and in my back you played your actual games. And I know I'm to blame too to be the actual blind and fool" His ferocious cold laughter danced in the silent atmosphere.

I swallowed down and kept quite, not uttering a word. I'll listen to him today, I won't speak. That's all that kept running in my head.

"I knew from before you and that fucked up son of a bitch were something but you kept denying terming him as your so called bestfriend" I opened my eyes when I felt a jerk on my upper arm. His hand clenched my right arm, forcing me to face him.

"Tell me wasn't he the same bestfriend you slept with when I was your fucking boyfriend? I wonder how many men you slept with behind my back?" His jaw clenched and my eyes sparked with tears.

I whispered and my eyes fell on the floor again not able to look at him anymore. "Did you forget everything?" the pain on my arm increased as he clenched it tighter and left me with a jerk.

I fell on the floor, not even having it in me to stand and face him. He believed I slept with Levi and it was that what I made him believe that time. Cause I didn't know what else to do, cause I didn't know how to react or anything. I was broke. I was so angry at him that time that I wanted him to feel the same pain I felt.

But he knows nothing. Exactly nothing what I got to know about him. How much it shattered me into pieces when I got to know everything about him. How much it hurt me when I didn't want to believe those but had to believe after everything.

I wanted to shout at his face it wasn't me but him who cheated. It wasn't me but him you didn't value anything. It wasn't me but him who hid everything. I wasnt a liar rather he was, who lied about everything, even his identity.

But I choosed to stay silent. Now what? Nothing will change. Truth can't change anything.

He leaned in beside me and tilted my chin. I let out a shaky breath low whimpers kept coming out my mouth and my eyes clenched shut. "Open your eyes" his voice calm than before. In a slow manner I opened my wet eyes.

My eyes met his cold dark eyes and I bited my lower lip to stop sobbing.

"Why are you crying now? Afraid?" He raised his eyebrow and side of his lip raised upward. "You should be afraid" He merely whispered the words on my face looking me in the eyes. "Cause because of you I lost the most precious thing of my life. You will pay for it. Won't you?" He smirked and left me.

I knew what he termed precious can never be me, cause if I was precious to him why did he do everything. I have no clue exactly what precious thing this man could lose because of me, when he was the one who owned everything and could have the whole damn world under his feet if he wanted. It was me who lost everything. Happiness, peace and my liveliness of life. I lost everything.

In the next second I heard his steps going away and the door closed with a thud after he left. I couldn't hold myself anymore.

I bought my legs to my chest and cried my heart out laying on the cold marble floor, alone in the whole silent apartment.

Wasn't he the one who hurted me? Why am I suffering now? Wasn't he the one how played with my feelings? Why am I at fault now?

****Flashback****

"I'm leaving, it's urgent. Pay with my card and the driver will drive you home after you're finished." That's all he said tossing his credit card on the table after seeing something on his phone. He rushed out of the restaurant in the middle of dinner, ruining our date once again, leaving me alone for the third time now. He never gives me any explanation. He left me alone in this empty restuarent he booked only for us. He just left.

All I know is I'm getting really frustrated with his this kind of behaviour day by day. If anything really came up he should tell me at least. I'm also tensed for him.

I stirred my soup with the spoon until it turned cold. I don't know what's happening but he is behaving strange these days. He doesn't pay me attention when I spoke, he doesn't spend time with me like before. Is he getting bored of me?

A tiny drop of tear fell into my soul bowl and that was when I knew I'm crying. I bit onto my lip, as another tear escaped my eyes and dissolved in the soup again.

I am scared. Is he alright? What happened to him? My heart tightened thinking he doesn't want me anymore. I knew I am too afraid to lose him, to lose the only man I loved in my entire life.

I paid the bill with my card even after he gave me his own. We didn't even eat half of the dinner and I didn't have any appetite left in me to eat. His driver drove me back to my apartment.

No messages. No calls. He didn't even ask me if I reached home like he used to but I calmed myself thinking he might me busy or something really important came up.

This went for days. And then a week was over. It was like he disappeared in the thin air. I wanted him to text me, to call me, to come to me because it was him who left me there all alone and I was still angry at him. And this was the third time he left me alone like that. A week went by but I have no idea about his whereabouts. Where is he? How is he doing? Anxiety ran down my nerves whenever I thought something happened to him or something is really wrong.

I decided to leave my ego and see him. I didn't text nor called him cause I only wanted to meet him and talk to him. We can't stay like this, we need to talk. And is he really so busy, he can't give me a single text let alone a call in a whole damn week!?

As if he read everything in my mind, he came to see me the same day. I downed my eyes when I opened the door finding him leaning against the door frame. He hugged me and I closed my eyes. I felt relief. His hugs always somehow manages to relief me.

"I missed you and I'm sorry" He uttered kissing my hair. I melted and I forgave him like I always do. We barely spent an hour together when he said he needs to go because he is leaving for Russia after two hours and it will take quite a few days there. I was hurt for a while cause he didn't mention it to me before and being separated again. He said he'll be too busy, so maybe we won't be able to talk. I'm hurt more but he took my pain away with an apologetic kiss. Probably that's good because my exams are going to start and I can keep my focus on my study.

A few days passed without him. Once, getting off a cab I saw his car parked on the sideway. It's his car? I knew it was. He is back? He didn't even inform me! The car started to move. I got inside the cab again and asked the driver to follow his car because I want to meet him. Too freaking eager to meet him.

I can't wait any longer. My heart is beaming with joy and excitement. I want to hug him and express how much I missed his presence.

The sun is going down. I paid the driver money and looked around the place where his car is parked. Why is he here? The place doesn't seem to be welcoming.

I took curious but slow steps towards the place which looked like a garage, the way I saw him going before.

I peeked though the almost closed door and what I saw ceased my breaths and halted my body from moving.

There were more men. They all seemed to be dangerous goons. Two other men were hanging in the air as their hands were tied with the rope which was hooked to the ceiling.

I'm so afraid looking at the sight but my feet is already ready to run inside to Azezal. What if they do anything to him? I can't let anything happen to him! Just as I was about to take a step, I halted when I saw the men giving him space and standing in a circle.

Aze looked tranquil as he rolled up his sleeves revealing his tattooed arms, folding them on his chest as he sat on a high chair. All other man surrounded him and watched him silently.

And then tears run down my cheeks in amusement and fear of what I am seeing. "Continue" He uttered and those two tied up men were beaten to dead with rods by the men. And Aze kept watching them like it's a show going on.

Is this real!? My eyes didn't want to believe what they are seeing. I didn't believe what is happening infront of my eyes.

Why is Aze here and what all these are happening here. I couldn't comprehend anything.

But then what I saw it was even out of my imagination. My eyes widened and my breaths stuck in my chest with astonishment. Aze raised a gun and shot one of the guys brutally 3 times in the skull, mercilessly without a second thought and that guy is hanging dead.

My hand clasped my mouth firmly and my heart raced at a speed that I felt like I would prolly get a heartattack at the instant shock I got.

My head was already spinning, my tears kept running down, I couldn't move. My eyes secured at him as I watched him laughing like I never saw. His laughter was vicious and barbaric. He looked like someone I never knew. It isn't't the Aze. It can't be him!

I couldn't deal with it anymore, I couldn't stare anymore. I ran from there gasping for air. I don't know how I got home but i only know one thing is i can't stop sobbing. I cried more and more and puked beacuse of the nausea due to what I saw. No. No. It's a nightmare. It ain't true. He is in Russia. He didn't come back. Hallucination. It's all hallucination.

Two days passed. He didn't contact me yet. At this point, my whole mind and body is tensed with anxiety and agitation. I can't do anything, couldn't concentrate in anything even if I want to. I want to believe it was surreal but a part of me is afraid it is not.

Taking my phone I finally decided to call him. Ask him when he is coming back. He is still in Russia right? My heart refuses to believe everything my eyes are telling me to believe. How can I even dream such a horrible dream?

The phone ringed a few times, there was no response. I called again and again, for at least 6 times but there wasn't any response.

I couldn't tolerate anymore so I choose to confirm my thoughts and decided to visit his home. I rang the doorbell and the caretaker opened it. "Hi. Do you have any idea when Azezal is coming back from Russia?" "Russia?" She sounded confused. "I dont know what you are talking about but sir was here an hour ago but he left. Probably will come back at night." My heart tightened in my chest hearing her.

He lied to me? He didn't go to Russia?

I thought about visiting his office. He must be there and there must be a reasonable reason why he lied to me.

When I reached his office, I went to the the reception. "Ma'am how may I help you?" The girl standing there asked humbly. I'm impatient. "Azezal Pavano. I want to meet him" "Do you have an appointment, ma'am?" She asked again. "No. Can you please give him a call and tell Leera is here to meet him" I requested in a low voice. "Sorry ma'am, I can't call him. It may cause disturbance to him. Maybe I can inform his assistant" she replied.

"Okay." I mentally prayed to meet him today. After the call she looked at me apologetically and said breaking my hope, "Sorry ma'am, Sir is busy and there is no chances for you to meet him today. Come back tomorrow."

I didn't say anything just nodded and left from there. Is he that busy he can't respond to my single text? What made him lie to me about going to Russia? I went home once again with tears in my eyes.

I stepped inside my house and the first thing that caught my eyes is an envelope which was laying just at the door step like it got inside as someone pushed it under the door.

I opened the envelope and got a few pictures inside. My heart was about to blust seeing what were in the pictures. A woman's hands are fisting his hair and they are kissing. The girl in the picture barely wore any clothes. The place in the picture seemed to he his own house. I swallowed as my tear drops fell down as I kept staring at the pictures.

Then in the next picture they were in bed. The pictures fell down on the floor from my hands as my hands started to shake. My heart arched and shattered like it never did before. I fell on the floor, crying. I didn't even look at the other pictures, I tore all of them apart. Burned them without glancing them ever again.

I caged my own self in my house. I'm totally left alone. I cried and cried almost two days straight, nobody knew what happened to me.

25th May. The sky lighted with thunders. The loud sounds of thunderbolt scared the night, silent moon as it hid behind the dark clouds. But the storm going inside me is fierce than this storm. My heart jolted with pain, and I am lost inside myself as I kept staring through the window.

I gave up. I'm shattered. He broke my every hope. Lies. Lies. Lies.

All of a sudden someone started ringing my door bell like a maniac. At first I had no urge to open the door, so I pretended like I wasn't here. But it never stopped and the door is almost about the state to be broken.

"Leera I know you are inside! Open the damn door" The familiar voice shouted from outside. I didn't want to but I ended up opening the door. My face fully blank and emotionless.

"Leeraa! What happened to you? You literally disappeared like a ghost?" He said impatiently, his voice loud. No words made out of my mouth. I was totally lost and tired to speak to anyone. He hugged me but I felt nothing.

"Leera?" He cupped my face urging me to look him in the eyes. His hands cold and wet. Water drifted off his hair as if he ran in the rain for me. "Tell me what happened, panda" Tears run down my eyes as I looked at his eyes which held so much care for me. I couldn't speak, I felt numb.

Without anymore word he hugged me again. His shirt wet probably because it's raining outside. He ran down in rain even if it's downpouring so bad. Why did he had to come to me in this storm, do I even deserve so much care?

I felt his hand caressing my hair as he hugged me. I hid my face in his shoulder hugging him back and letting the tears run down and wet his already wet shirt. "You don't have to say anything. Just let it out. Let it all out" he murmured in a low voice and his words held promise that he'll console me.

"Azezal" I only managed to say his name. "What did he do, panda? Tell me." I kept crying. No words made out of my mouth. He understood and didn't push it any further.

Half an hour passed while I kept weeping silently and he tried his best to console me while he didn't even had any clue what actually happened. I didn't say anything to him, I just couldn't. The rain was still nowhere to stop.

After I let my tears out, I felt some kind of relieved. Due to hugging him my dress became wet too. He is still wet from head to toe. He said his car damaged in the middle of the road so he had to run in the stormy rain.

As it was late and the rain wasn't even near to stopping, I requested him not to go. My clothes wouldn't fit him so he just wore a bathrobe. He didn't want to stay but my two words "Don't go" convinced him. My apartment has two rooms, so he stayed in the other room.

I stared at the ceiling, thinking about everything, tears kept wetting my pillow and suddenly that time someone rang my doorbell. I looked at the clock, 2 at night, so late.

Wiping my tears I climbed off the bed and Levi was also out of the room. He said he's look who is it and asked me to step back. The moment he opened the door my eyes fell on the person. My heart tightened and my breaths halted as I looked at him after so many days. Azezal. The inside me uttered his name and my heartbeats jolted faster.

Then again, my mind was totally wretched for whatever happened these days. So aggrieved and too indignant at him that I couldn't think straight anymore.

"Azezal get out of here. Leera doesn't want to see you now" Levi barked at him. Without a word he punched Levi onto the floor and my hand went to my mouth. He walked aggressively towards me. His face demonically dangerous as I remembered that brutal him I saw before. Suddenly Im so afraid. I was about to hold onto Levi when he jerked me back into my place. "What the fuck is he doing here at this hour?" I remained silent, not meeting his eyes. "I asked you something!" He jerked me by my arm. Why is he being like this?

"Azezal, just go away" that's all I said and bited my lower lip before I start to cry again. I didn't want to face him anymore, I just didn't had that in me anymore. It's almost been a month and he returned to me now. No calls, no texts, no whereabouts, no nothing. That day when I saw him killing those men, I questioned my eyes if what they saw were really true. I wanted to believe him, I wanted to know from him, I wanted to ask him all about it. But time passed and I didn't get that chance to get to solve my questions and again i faced his lies and when I decided to trust him again, those pictures came up and shattered my every hope and every piece of me.

"I want to know what the fuck is he doing here!? Cant you get me?" His voice rough and cold, he never spoke to me like this before. "Can't you get me, I want you to leave" I uttered again, pain struck my shattered heart as I looked up at him. "You are sleeping with this bastard! Ain't you?" He growled vigorously making me incensed now. I'm sleeping with Levi? Is he a damn maniac? Did he lost his mind? My mind burned with fury and anger. He's the one sleeping behind my back and again how can he blame me for something like that.

"Azezal, leave her!" Levi uttered and Aze looked like he was about to kill now. "Leera, I fucking asked you something!" He uttered aggressively clenching my arms. At this point Levi came and pushed him away from me and that was it, Aze lost it and started punching him onto the floor as he blew out blood from his face in a matter of seconds and cursed out words. I was frightened so much looking at this scene.

"AZEZAL!!! STOPP! I SAID STOPP" I screamed my lungs out and he stopped unexpectedly. "Leera, I'm asking the last time. You slept- " I pushed at his chest aggravated. "Yes! So what? What will you do? I'll do anything I want. Where were you these days? Why did you come bavk now? You have no right on me. Do you hear me?Just leaveee" I screamed at his face this time.

"I can't believe you. How can you say that?" He tried to hold my face and I backed off. "Just leave before I call the security guards" I said furiously and that was it he left without another word and I knew it was the end. End of it.

I spoke without thinking. I spat the words at his face without thinking about the outcomes or anything. I just knew I was angry at him and I was right in my place.

But I never got an explanation or never got to ask him anything as he disappeared in the thin air once again. And this time he never returned, like he vanished from the damn earth after that night. And it was also then I realized I never wanted to meet him again. It was over, all over. Cause now I knew, he isn't the Aze I knew he is someone else. He could have come to me and told me all these were misconceptions but he didn't which simplified the truth to me. He left me as if I never was in his life. He disappeared from my life as if he never was in it in the first place.

AZEZAL POV

Setting the gun on the desk, I looked at the picture frame tracing it with my fingers.

The most beautiful lady, the most dearest person of my life. It was the picture of my mom carrying me when I was a 4 years old boy and Elena was standing beside her.

I remembered how everything was destroyed that night. The night of 25th March.

****Flashbackkk****

"Leave that woman" My father shouted. "That girl is nothing but hampering you. Women are the things which should only be used for satisfying needs. You ain't admitting but I can see the changes in you, Azezal!"

"I said it, she is nothing to me. Just time pass" I averted my eyes. I didn't want to admit to him that she meant anything to me, cause I knew very well that he will try his best to demolish everything if he even gets a hint of it. That's why I hid Leera from him, from my family. But he got to know and I knew he will keep his eyes on me now, and do everything he can to find out about Leera and my relationship more.

.........

"Boss, the Red Spades are getting onto our nerves. They are hunting down our warehouses and killing our men at large." I knew this time it was danger as they were vigorous too. Tough competent but I also knew we could handle this.

Days spent as I was busy with the under mob world. Crashing and blood everywhere. The situation was entirely messy.

On the other hand my dad's suspection that I was turning weak because I had something for a girl grew more. For that I didn't contact her or responded to her or even met her for days. I told her I will be going to Russia and I cant contact her which was a lie. He could easily tract down my phone if he wanted and I knew that he surely will. And to prove that I didn't have feelings for Leera I had to pay a slut for acting with me. My father had his men watch over me. Even if I slept with a lot of women since my teenage life, I never dared to look at any woman since I became loyal to Leera.

She was all and everything for me.

After probably a month, I couldn't hold myself away from her any longer. It stormed that night but I had to see her. See her at any cost. My heart ached to see her, to hold her in my arms and say sorry and explain everything to her. Why I couldn't talk to her, why I couldn't meet her.

I wanted to reveal my own self to her very soon. She knew who I was but not actually who I was. She only new a part of me but not the most significant part of me that I was always so scared to show her thinking she would leave me or everything will be over. She didn't knew I was in mafia, the soon to be the capo and head of Costa nostra. I didn't know if she suited for this world but I was already too selfish to let her go. I couldn't, I just couldn't.

When I saw Levi at her house shirtless and at this hour I lost every but of my patience and reacted like a damn idiot. I was already frustrated with the under mob world as a giant mess was going around and this. I was at the edge of handling myself from not killing him only because of her. But whatever she said that night didn't only break my heart but ruined everything. Every fucking thing.

That night I went straight to my home and drank down bottles after bottles of alcohol, my head spinning with anger and fury blusted inside me. I shot down the glasses and mirrors. Everything was a mess. She slept with that bastard! How can she? She can't... right? She loved me like the way I did. Why would she do it? But the words she spoke with so much confidence that didn't clarify my thinking.

My phone rang and rang. I was absolutely drunk at this point even if I hardly get drunk. I drank so much that I couldn't stand straight. My phone rung for the 5th time now when I grasped it and the dialer said 'mom' but my mind was not working flatout and I was already frustrated that I flinged the phone harshly at the wall.

It was the morning after I gained my conscience, dejected me knew that was the worst thing I did in my whole life. Tears grew it my eyes for the first time after 20 years as I saw the news that said my mom died due to the attack at my dad's place.

My dad wasn't at home. The place was guarded but the attackers were vigorous. They were the same people, those destructive Red spades. They killed my mom. My mom called me several times. I wish I received it, I wish I wasnt drunk. I wish I could have saved her, Saved the most precious person of my life, Saved the person who was my only hope since my childhood.

But it was all because of her. Only because of her.

****flashback end******

My blood boiled for revenge and that I'll get anyhow from her. She will pay for everything, every misery she caused in my life, she will pay for it a very catastrophic portion......

___________________________________________

Not edited. Probably a lottt off mistakes in this chapter lmao. Consider please.

Oml such a big chapter. Ahh. I wanted to write the whole history in one chapter so it is really a huge one I guess lol and so it took time too. Finally the past is revealed! What ya'll think about it??

Do share your thoughts. Always so eager to listen from y'all <3

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