Unknown POV

She's just standing there. Leaning against the stall door, staring at that stupid animal. I'm so close, yet she's completely unaware of my presence, the little bitch. I've said it once and I'll say it again, she's too fucking comfortable here. She thinks she can just do what she wants, when she wants to, and doesn't ask for permission anymore. They've given her bad habits.

Don't worry my little good girl. I'll fix that. Even if it means taking you for another stay in the cells. You'll learn how to be good again. We'll have you right back where you belong soon. Mark my words.

We'll just have to do something about that twin of your's first.





Juliana's POV

"I'm not scared of you." I grit out, staring him right in the eyes for the first time in a long time. "You don't scare me, you don't get to scare me anymore."

He stares back at me with a blank stare, and I really can't tell what he's thinking. Does he hate me? Does he think it's unfair? Is he secretly plotting my slow and miserable death?

Sighing, I extend my good arm towards him, opening my palm and letting him chomp the apple out of it. I tilt my head, pursuing my lips.

It really hasn't been that long since the last time I was here. The guy I met last time was technically supposed to be babysitting me, but I don't know where he ran off to. What was his name again? Frank? Raymond? Casper?

I walk slowly down the length of the barn, kicking up random piles of dust as I forcefully blow air out of my lips, causing them to pursue. Over the past couple days especially I've been getting this nagging feeling.

I need to see him.

I can't keep avoiding him. Or asking the others to help make sure Jameson and I never accidentally run into each other. And to my knowledge, it worked. Almost two weeks since my whole life blew up in under twenty four hours and I thankfully haven't seen the person responsible yet.

I guess that's wrong of me to say. Maria and I talked about this last session. In her words, it's her job to "challenge" that black and white thinking. She's also been pressing me to remember that technically my brother is not the one responsible for my trauma.

That's one horse-pill that I'm not ready to swallow yet. Get it? Horse pill? Because I'm in a barn, filled with horses... No? Okay.

Not to mention, therapy sucks. I mean, the colouring books, the play doh, the games, they're fun and all, but it still sucks. And it's definitely not something I feel the need to be committing three hours of my week to.

Yeah you heard that right. Three. Days. A. Week. Who the hell gets sentenced to three days of therapy a week? That's almost half the week right there! Granted one of them is family therapy, so we're all forced to suffer together, but it still sucks.

Ugh, family therapy. Don't even get me started on that little hour of awkward hell.

A shriek escapes my mouth when I try to step away from the stall, only for my boot to get caught on someone's shoe. I'm scared for a moment, that I'll be forced to choose between catching myself and hurting my collarbone, or busting my face open when an arm wraps around my ribs.

Worst. Option. Ever.

Ryker yanks me back up, and must see the pained look on my face because he immediately retracts his arm. I let out a weak sounding cough, folding in half, my good arm bending inwards, clutching my shirt like that's going to help my ribs.

Ryker leans me against the stall door, and it takes a minute of deep breaths to convince my brain that I'm not dying.

"I'm sorry, kid, I forgot about your ribs." Ryker apologizes, his thumb brushing against my cheek, wiping off a tear and didn't realize I had let escape. Looking up at him I realize the closeness of our bodies, how he's standing directly over me.

I feel his finger dragging slowly down the side of my face, his eyes drifting downwards with it. I'm more than aware of how he's standing over me, I can feel his breath on my forehead. Both of those things would have normally annoyed or freaked me out.

But not with him.

I don't even notice that way his fingers have drifted down from my jaw to the side of my neck, drifting dangerously close to my collarbone, the broken one, might I add. But it doesn't worry me. For some reason, I'm not scared of him.

He would never hurt me.

I flinch when I feel a puff of air hit the back of my head, followed by a loud huffing sound. I jerked forward, finding myself face first into Ryker's chest. He grunts, stepping back, his arm wrapping around me, pulling me with him.

Letting out a choked sound in the back of my throat, I look up at him, my cheeks warm. I open my mouth to say something but nothing comes out as I see him looking into my eyes. My mouth closes slowly as I swallow against my suddenly dry mouth.

A voice clearing breaks us apart.

I turn to see Caspian standing at the entrance of the barn, looking between the two of us. We had both backed up at the same time, so there was a more respectable distance between us, but I'm not stupid enough to believe he didn't see our little moment.

"Wanna ride Mango?" My head pops up and a smile takes on my face as he says this. Mango is the thoroughbred I got to ride last time. Ride is definitely a lax noun in this scenario, seeing as the most I've done so far is sit on the horse for three minutes and take deep breaths.

Nonno definitely does not understand the meaning of gentle parenting because when I said I wanted off, he argued that I hadn't even gone anywhere and held onto me while he forced me to walk Mango the entire circle. It. was. horrible.

Did I end up liking it, yes, but that was very mean if you ask me.

We go outside and Caspian opens the gate to the round pen, holding it open for me as I see Mango already waiting, and rush over to him. Well, as fast as someone in a boot can hobble.

"Hi baby, did you miss me?" I ask, running my arm along his neck, giggling as he turns his head into me and sniffs my hair before letting out a sneeze-like sound.

Mango is a tan colored thoroughbred with a dark brown, poop colored, mane and tail. According to Caspian, he got his name because some ranch hand thought he looked like the inside of a mango, but I really don't see it. The inside of a mango is orange. Mango is tan... Make it make sense.

Mango isn't quite as tall as some of the other horses around here, something that Ryker doesn't let me forget. Apparently he was 14 hands, whatever that meant, and that's short for a horse. Whether he is lying or not, when you're the one on top of the horse, the ground seems a lot further away than you'd think.

"He doesn't understand you." I hear Ryker voice his opinion from behind me, and I turn just enough that he can see me stick my tongue out at him. Maturely, of course.

"Ryker, don't lie to the girl." Caspian says from my other side, resting his hand on Mango's back, in front of the saddle as he turns to speak to me. "Don't listen to him, Julianna, he's just jealous because no animal in their right mind likes him."

"Wonder why." I mutter, smirking as Caspian snorts and Ryker lets out a breath of displeasement.

Caspian helps me to walk up the steps of the wooden mounting block. It gives me an extra foot of height, and allows me to hold onto him while swinging my hurt leg over the horse's back. Mango stays perfectly still, even as I wriggle around, trying to carefully situate my weight onto his back without throwing off my center of gravity like I did the first time.

That was a total mess. I ended up fully sending it onto Mango's back, almost falling right off the other side if it hadn't been for Nonno who was there to steady me.

That's probably why, before I was even fully on the horse, Ryker was ready on the other side, one hand guiding my booted leg, as the other held onto the side of my hip, making sure I don't overcompensate.

I sit there for a moment as Caspian clips the lunge line to Mango's bridle, and as he walks out towards the center of the round pen, I can feel Ryker's thumb rub up against my hip.

"Um, Ryker?" I whisper to him, looking down to see that he was already looking at me.

"Yes, kid?"

"You have to let go of me..." Ryker looks down at his hand, as if confused as to why it was still on me, before clearing his throat and letting it fall down to his side.

As Ryker walks back to the gate, I take a deep breath, strangely aware of how hot it was. How the sun beat down on my skin and ignore the nervous sweat that was beginning to form over my forehead.

My right arm feels awkward in the sling, so I slip it off before Caspian or Ryker can say anything. I toss it randomly into the dirt, not caring where it ends up. I would be very grateful to never see that thing again.

"Alright Julianna, use your thighs and squeeze his sides." Caspian calls out.

I let out another breath, squeezing as tight as I can, but Mango doesn't go anywhere. I try a couple more times before looking at Caspian pleadingly. He raises his eyebrow at me, but gives a slight tug to the lunge line regardless.

My left hand clutches the reins tightly as Mango begins to step forward, his body beginning a slow sway, throwing my balance off. I make it a few steps before I give in and clutch the horn of the saddle, trying to find a better sense of stability.

Falling off is like my worst fear right now. This is the first time I've not had someone standing next to me. Both Caspian and Ryker are too far away to be of any help if Mango decides he wants to attempt murdering me.

"You planning to hold onto that thing the whole time?" Ryker's voice calls out to me, light and teasing with a hint of amusement behind it.

"I'm just... trying to get used to it." My cheeks flush as I readjust my grip, tightening my fingers on the saddle horn I hear Ryker let out a laugh.

"That thing isn't going to do you any good when Mango there decides you're better off on the ground."

"Ryker!" Caspian snaps, his voice calling out like a whip. "That wasn't necessary. If you're not going to add any value to her lesson then please learn to keep your mouth shut."

I smile as I hear Ryker let out a dignified huff. I've almost completed my first circle of the pen when I hear a voice yelling out in italian. Glancing over to my left, I look to see what I assume is another stable hand, if I'm judging by his clothes.

Caspian yells something back in italian, saying it so quickly that I don't have a chance to translate it in my brain before he's talking to Ryker in english.

"Watch her, will you?"

Ryker and Caspian do a switch-a-roo, where Caspian leaves and Ryker takes the lungeline. He pulls on it, causing me to yelp as Mango comes to a halt.

"What the hell dude?" I groan, having been pitched forward when I overcompensated for Mango's sudden stop. I peel myself away from Mango's neck, wiping my mouth to try and get the taste of 'horses mane' out of my mouth. It's very grainy.

"You won't be needing this anymore." Ryker says, walking over to me. I watch with confusion as Ryker unclips the lungeline.

"What the hell!" I explain, clutching the saddle horn tighter as if that's going to prevent Mango from bolting the first chance he gets.

"Julianna, you're fine. I was joking earlier, Mango is as old as they get. He doesn't give enough fucks to take off on ya." Ryker gives Mango a firm pat on the side of his neck before he starts walking off.

"Not helping." I mutter before realizing that he's actually leaving me alone. In a pen. With a horse. By myself. "Hey wait! Where are you going? I need you!"

Ryker leans against the fence, completely unbothered as a smirk overtakes his face. "Really? You need me?"

"You know what I meant." I scowl. Cocky ass bastard.

"Go on, give him a kick." He says, continuing when I give him a concerned look. "Don't use your left leg, obviously, and it doesn't have to be a hard one. Just give him a light nudge with your right leg."

Does this asshole really want me to kick a horse? What am I, an animal abuser? I give him a go to hell look and he just raises that stupid eyebrow again.

"Aww," He says after a moment. "Is the little one scared to walk around the pen by herself?" He says in a mocking tone, giving me an innocent smile.

"I'm not scared!" I snap back at Ryker. "I'm just... unsure."

Ryker continues to stare smugly at me and I grit my teeth. Looking back down to Mango, I give him the slightest tap with my right foot. I feel him shuffle a little bit. I wait a moment, and then tap him with my foot again, a little firmer.

For a second, Mango just stands there, but then like magic, he takes a step forward. And then another and another until we've started our normal slow pace around the pen again.

Gasping, I look up at Ryker with wide eyes and a smile that probably shouldn't be aimed at him swinging my feet in excitement. Ryker's face goes from smug to stern in about zero point two seconds.

"Hey!" He calls out to me. It's not a mean or angry tone, just more of a stern one that makes my legs still. When he sees this, his next words are softer. "Kick like that and he's gonna think you want him bolt. I know I was teasing you earlier, but I don't think you actually want a facefull of dirt today."

I smile guiltily, letting my legs relax at Mango's side as we continue our second slow journey around the pen. I shift in the saddle as Mango continues his journey, my right arm crooked uselessly in front of me, holding on softly to the top of the saddle horn. My other hand is the one clutching the reins and the base of the horn, the grip tighter than it should be, feeling like that's the only thing keeping me upright.

By this point, I'm sweating profusely, my right leg in the stirrup, my left leg hanging there uselessly, aching with every movement. I glance up, catching Ryker's gaze for a second before I look back down at Mango.

I can still feel Ryker's gaze on me, and it's... a lot. I feel safe, knowing he's watching me and even though he says I'm fine, I can't help but wish he was closer. All while wishing he was nowhere near me and couldn't see me. Is he still looking at me?

A quick glance in his direction tells me that he has in fact, not taken his eyes off me. Not sure whether that makes me feel safer or uncomfortable. Ryker watches me for a moment, then says, "How's the collarbone?"

"Fine," I answered quickly. Too quickly. It hurts like hell, feels like I'm being stabbed actually, but I don't want him to see that. "Just don't want to fall off."

"You're not going to fall," he says, his tone changing slightly, more firm now. "I'll make sure of it. You're just going to follow the rhythm, okay? Don't overthink it."

I nod, even though my thoughts are scattered. I pull the reins lightly, guiding Mango into another slow circle.

We make our way slowly around the paddock, and I focus on keeping my balance. But as Mango's head starts to turn toward the gate, I give the reins a little tug, trying to steer him.

"Not like that," Ryker says quickly, his voice sharp. He pushes away from the gate, starting to walk towards me. "You yank on his mouth like that and he's going to get frustrated, not turn. Gentle pressure, remember?"

I nod, trying to adjust, but as I give the reins another yank, Mango sways under me, and before I can stop it, I'm pitching forward. My heart skips a beat as I feel myself losing my balance, my body leaning too far over the side.

Ryker curses softly and lunges forward, catching me by the waist before I fall off entirely. His hands are on my hips as he shoves me back up onto the saddle, preventing me from sliding off completely.

"What did I just tell you?" he snaps, his voice low but firm. "You can't just yank on the reins like that. You have to be light with him—he's not a machine."

I bite my lip, mortified, and scramble to steady myself. "I... I was just trying to turn him."

"Yeah, well, you almost turned yourself off the saddle." His hands drop to my thigh once he's sure I won't fall, but his eyes are still hard, and his tone is sharper than before. "You have to trust him, not just pull him around like he's some kind of toy. Relax."

I nod again, this time more seriously, forcing myself to calm down. Ryker watches me for a moment, then sighs, clearly frustrated but trying to hide it.

"Just take a deep breath, do it again, and be gentle this time. You don't have to rush, Julianna. He's not going anywhere."

I bite my lip and try to loosen my grip. His words sink in, but there's a tightness in my chest I can't shake. I focus on Mango's smooth gait beneath me, telling myself to breathe.

Just then, I hear Caspian's voice from the other side of the paddock, loud enough that I can't ignore it. "Well, well, what do we have here?" His voice is teasing, and I feel a flush creep up my neck. "Ryker, you teaching the girl to ride, or are you teaching her how to fall for you?"

I can feel Ryker tense beside me, the muscles in his shoulders tightening. His jaw clenches as Caspian's words hang in the air, but he doesn't respond right away, instead he takes his hand off my thigh, walking over to where the old ranch hand stands at the fence.

I redirect Mango, just like Ryker instructed, being much more gentle this time and not freaking out when he actually does change directions. We continue to make our way around the pen and I stay silent, listening in on Caspian and Ryker's conversation.

Caspian's laugh carries across the field, making it pretty easy to pick up the words that follow. "I gotta say, Ryker, she's a little young for you, don't you think? You sure you're not rushing things?"

I grip the reins tighter, my stomach twisting. I try not to react, but the words hit harder than I expect. Ryker, meanwhile, lets out a sharp breath, irritation creeping into his voice as he finally speaks. "Drop it, Caspian. I was making sure she didn't eat dirt."

Caspian, undeterred, leans in closer to Ryker, his tone light but filled with mischief. "Oh, come on, I'm just saying... she's barely out of diapers, and here you are getting all close and cozy." He lets out a chuckle, clearly enjoying every second of it. "Might want to hold off before you make a move on someone so...what's the word...young."

Ryker's grip on the fence tightens visibly, and he's clearly trying to bite back a reaction. "Shut up, Caspian," he growls, his voice rougher now, trying to keep his cool. "She's not a kid, and she's learning."

Caspian smirks, leaning against the fence, thoroughly enjoying the discomfort he's causing. "Sure, sure. Just saying, Ryker. You're a little too grown up for a girl who still looks like she order's off the kids menu at a restaurant."

Caspian steps forward, his gaze flicking between Ryker and me as he crosses his arms over his chest. "You know, Ryker," he says, his voice quieter now, the teasing edge still there but with something more pointed behind it, "she's what? Five years younger than you? Maybe you should think about that."

Ryker's shoulders stiffen, his jaw clenching. "Caspian, don't."

Caspian doesn't back off, his expression turning a little more serious. "I'm not saying you don't mean well, but she's just a kid. You need to be careful."

The words hit harder than I expect, and I feel a tightness in my chest. Ryker's hand tightens on the fence, his voice low but sharp. "I know what I'm doing. Just—leave it alone."

Caspian raises an eyebrow, still watching him closely. "I'm just saying, she's got a lot of growing up to do. You don't need to be dragging her into something she's not ready for."

Ryker's face hardens, but I can see the tension in his posture, the frustration mounting. He looks at Caspian, then at me, but his expression is unreadable. "I'm not dragging her anywhere. I'm just teaching her how to ride. Nothing more."

But even as he says it, I can tell he's not entirely convinced, and neither am I. The quiet weight of the conversation hangs in the air between us as I slowly steer Mango in their direction, after hearing that conversation, I'm more than done with riding for the day.

"Alright, Ryker, just... be careful alright?" Caspian finally sighs, a slow, resigned sound, looking up at me as he speaks. "You're not the only one who's going to get hurt if things go sideways."

Ryker doesn't answer right away, his gaze drifting to the ground, and the silence stretches out longer than I like.

I shift on Mango, looking out to the car that's pulling up the long driveway, the unease growing in my stomach. It's hard to ignore the way their words make everything feel heavier, like there's something else we're all trying not to face.



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It's been two months... No comment.

We're almost done though, this story is almost over My heart is breaking. See ya'll next year!