We were all at the Eternal Garden, visiting my child. I named him or her Jose Leigh Cartier because I didn't know if he was a boy or a girl. There was a tent and blankets beside his/her grave, and we also brought some food.

Mateo wasn't with us because he had something to take care of. We would have been complete if he was here. We've been here for a while now.

Lumunok ako. "Kamusta ka, anak? Miss ka na ni Mama. Sorry kung hindi kita nagawang iligtas. Mahina si Mama, eh. Hindi ko alam na buntis ako no'n. Sa tingin mo, pag alam ko bang buntis ako no'n, magkasama tayo ngayon at kilala mo ang kapatid mo?" I started, my voice cracking with tears. I felt Mama's hand on my shoulder.

I took a deep breath. "Sorry kung hindi kita nagawang protektahan at hinayaan kang umagos sa mga binti ko. Hindi ko alam gagawin ko no'n, kaso-," I started, but I couldn't finish my sentence. I broke down completely, sobbing. Mama hugged me tightly.

I felt the stares of our companions.

Whenever I remember the time he left, I can't help but blame myself. Because of me, he never got to experience life.

My world is too cruel for my baby. My baby didn't have a chance to see the world-but I am thankful because he/she didn't see how miserable my life is.

"Sorry, anak, sorry. Patawarin mo si Mama," Mama whispered to me. I felt a wave of sadness wash over me, and I closed my eyes.

"Mommy, stop crying. Ate or kuya will be sad kapag na-kita ka niyang umiiyak. I don't want to see you crying. Masakit dito oh," Levi said, pointing to his chest with teary eyes.

I pulled him close and hugged him.

After we had our time to grieve, laugh, and reflect, we decided to head home. We needed to prepare for Mateo's birthday.

~~~

We're getting ready for Mateo's birthday now. I don't know if I can bring myself to tell him to try for a baby with me. There's nothing wrong with it, right?

"E, sister, hindi ba't ayaw ni Mateo ng mag-celebrate ng kaarawan niya?" Mama asked Tita Majika.

"I know, but since we have apo na and he turned 35, I want him to celebrate. Also, request naman ito ni Luliana," Tita said. I smiled.

"Grandma, where can I put this, po?" Kyle asked, holding the cake. He was helping us prepare for the surprise party for his dad. Instead of just entering the house, which he could've done later, he insisted on helping.

"Put mo na lang sa table. Kami na lang mag-aayos. Also, can you get us meryenda, apo? Thank you!" Tita instructed, while arranging the decorations. She sounded like a child.

"What meryenda do you want po, Lola?" Kyle asked. Goodness, even my son has become a conyo.

Tita Majika smiled. "Anything, apo. Thank you," she said.

"Mommy, Lola, may want po ba kayo ipa-get na meryenda?" Kyle asked Mama and me. I just shook my head.

So conyo of my son.

"Kahit ano na lang din, apo. Salamat," Mama said with a smile. Kyle nodded and turned to leave.

"Hindi po ba iyon magagalit, Tita?" I asked.

He hates celebrating his birthday raw, kaya expected ko na hindi niya nagugustuhan kapag isurprise siya.

"He will, but don't worry, he can't do anything kasi nangyari na, eh. And if I tell him it's you who requested this... hindi siya magagalit," she said, shrugging. I shrugged too and continued what I was doing.

While we were arranging things, someone honked outside.

"May bisita ata, Tita?" I asked Tita Majika.

"Baka sina Tita Kristine mo na 'yan, Ija. Pwede pasalubong sila?" she said. Her attention was on the decorations she was fixing. I nodded even though she couldn't see me.

I went outside to see who it was. Alicia was the first one to get out of the car. She was frowning, but her expression changed to happiness when she saw me.

"Ate Luliana!" she shrieked as soon as she entered the house. She ran towards me, and Tita, Tito, and her twins just shook their heads.

Inirapan ko siya. "Ingay mo," I said, but she just laughed.

"Tita, Tito," I greeted them, and hugged them. Tito Jaron smiled at me.

"How are you, Ija?" Tita asked, smiling.

"Okay lang po. Tara na po sa loob. Hinihintay na po kayo ni Tita Majika," I said. They all nodded, and Alicia and I walked inside together. Tayrence and the others followed behind us.

Mama and Tita greeted each other, and they even offered to help us. We didn't refuse, of course, because it would help us finish faster.

We were done setting everything up, and it was already 4pm. We just waited for Mateo to get home. Our other guests had already arrived.

"Dad is here! He's home! Mom, Grandma!" Kyle shouted, making us all flustered. "What should we do? This is exciting!" he yelled again.

Tita Majika grabbed the cake, while others went to get the confetti. I started to fix my appearance, my nerves getting the better of me.

As the door opened and Mateo stepped inside, confetti exploded around him.

"Happy birthday, Mateo!" we all shouted. He looked surprised, like he'd seen a ghost. Tita Majika walked over to him.

"Mom, I told you I hate celebrating my birthday," he said. Tita Majika looked at me and winked.

She sighed, ready to put on a show. "Sayang, it's Luliana's request pa naman," she said, pretending to be sad. Mateo looked at me with surprise, but quickly turned back to his Mom.

He bit his side cheeks. "I w-was just kidding. I r-really like celebrating my birthday," he laughed nervously, then looked at me. We all smiled at his statement.

"Blow the candle now," Tita Majika said with a smile. He quickly blew out the candle, and we all clapped.

"Happy birthday!" we greeted him again.

"Thank you, everyone," he replied. We cheered loudly. I stopped cheering when I noticed he was looking at me. I shyly smiled back. He walked over to his son, picked him up, and thanked everyone.

"Yuck, Dad, stop kissing me," we heard our son say with a disgusted voice. We all laughed.

"Let's eat," Tita Majika said happily.

"Kainan na!" our guests shouted, especially my friends. I shook my head. Those two, always so loud.

We all ate together. I was seated next to my son, and Kyle was seated next to his dad. My two gossipy friends were at our table. They were quiet, acting all refined. But when Mateo wasn't around, they were like they hadn't gossiped in years.

"Kyle, stop using your phone. Eat first," Mateo said gently. Kyle pouted, but he obeyed and started to eat.

Mateo excused himself for a moment to talk to his guests. I couldn't find Kyle, but I just let it be. He wouldn't go outside, anyway. My two friends, on the other hand, started gossiping the moment Mateo left.

"Alam mo ba, girl, fired na si Cheska," Ella whispered.

Inubos muna ni Ella ang nasa bibig at uminom ng tubig. "Ay, oo, sis. Nilalandi pala niya si Sir Panot, tapos nahuli siya ng asawa kaya ayun, wala ng trabaho," Ella said. I didn't know whether to feel sad or laugh at her revelation. Ella nodded in agreement.

"Oo, girl. Nagmakaawa pa siyang wag paalisin dahil nangangaylangan. Jusko, ang babaeta talaga," Ella said, shaking her head.

"Kumapit sa patalim. Hindi na lang nag-advance," Jake added, rolling her eyes as if Cheska was right there. Even though we had our differences in the past, I couldn't help but feel concerned for her.

"Ano nangyari? Asaan siya? Hindi ba nakinig si Mrs. Panit sa posibleng rason niya?" I asked, one question after another.

"Jusko ka, girl. Kung andoon ka lang, baka matawa ka lang," Ella said, and they high-fived.

"Don't tell me, sis, nag-aalala ka ro'n? Baka nakakalimutan mo, may atraso pa sa atin 'yun," Jake said in a grumpy tone. I shook my head.

"Hindi naman sa ganun. Oo, may away kami noon, pero noon naman na 'yun, eh. Nag-aalala lang ako kasi baka may problema 'yung tao," I explained, but Jake just rolled her eyes.

"Gaga, wag ka maawa ro'n. Pangit nga ugali. Awayin ba naman kaming nananahimik," Ella grumbled.

"Truth. Tapos pinag-irap ba naman kami," Jake said. Those two, always.

"Sample nga ng irap," Ella teased.

"Fuck you," Jake said angrily. Ella just laughed.

"'Wag po, bata pa po ako. Madami pa akong pangarap," Ella continued teasing. I couldn't help but laugh.

Jake was about to speak when she suddenly went silent and pointed behind me.

"Sorry for ruining your chit-chat, but can I borrow Luliana for a minute?" Mateo asked. My two gossipy friends nodded eagerly, their voices suddenly soft and refined again. I grimaced. Plastic much?

They're acting like Maria Claras again.

"Sure, pakibalik na lang po mamaya," Ella said sweetly, offering a small smile. I discreetly rolled my eyes.

"Sige lang, Pare," Jake said, sounding very masculine. I stifled a laugh. To make things easier, I invited Mateo, noticing a flash of annoyance in his eyes, though I might have imagined it.

"Tara na. Ano ba 'yon?" I asked, turning away from my two friends.

"Excuse us," I heard Mateo say before he followed me.

"Ano iyon?" I asked immediately, because I was starting to get nervous. My heart was already racing, even though he was just approaching.

He took a deep breath. "I'm jealous," he said, sounding childish, and pouted.

"Huh?" I didn't understand what he was saying. "Kanino?" I asked, confused. He scratched his head and pouted again.

Cute.

"Sa friend mo. You both look happy when you're together," he said. After he said that, his pout became even more pronounced. Damn, it doesn't suit him.

Which friend was he referring to? Jake or Francisco?

"Sinong kaibigan? Si Jake?" I asked. He nodded. I burst out laughing. If Jake were here, he'd probably be throwing up from what he's hearing.

"Why are you laughing?" he said, sounding annoyed.

"Seriously, pinag-seselosan mo 'yon?" I said with difficulty, and laughed again. He grabbed my arms.

"Stop laughing, of course, I am jealous. Seeing you laughing with other men made my heart ache," he said dramatically. I tried my best to hold back my laughter.

If he knew how Jake was flirting with him earlier, he might just bang his head against the wall.

"'Wag ka mag-selos. Lalaki gusto no'n. Pusong babae siya," I said with a smile.

"See he likes- What? He likes men, so she, is she?" I didn't understand what he was saying, but I just nodded.

His ears were now red. "Damn, that's childish," I heard him mutter, but I still heard him. I laughed.

He cleared his throat awkwardly. "Is it true this is your request?" he asked calmly, changing the subject. I stopped laughing, and the nervousness I felt earlier returned.

"B-bakit? Hindi mo ba nagustuhan?" I asked. He seemed to snap out of it, and quickly shook his head.

"No, it's just that I didn't know how to say thank you. I really like that this celebrating my birthday thing is your request. It made my day. I am very happy. This is the best day of my life," he said, his ears turning red. I felt something flutter in my chest at his words.

I narrowed my eyes at him. "You're not mad?" I asked. He nodded.

"Of course not. As I said, this is the best and most amazing gift, since it is your request," he said, and his smile widened.

"Actually, may isa pa akong gift, pero nahihiya ako," I said shyly, touching my cheek when I felt it heat up.

"What is it?" he asked excitedly, like his mom was about to give him a toy gift.

"W-wala. Kalimutan mo na lang. Nahihiya ako," I said, covering my face with my hands out of embarrassment.

My heart started racing, and it felt like the temperature suddenly rose.

"Tell me what it is. It's just the two of us," he insisted, making me sigh heavily.

"S-sige na nga," I said, making him even more excited.

"I am waiting," he said. I took another deep breath before speaking.

I took another deep breath. I didn't know how many times I'd taken a deep breath already. "Let's try, Mateo," I said with a smile. The excitement in his eyes was replaced by surprise, and he seemed to freeze. I waved my hand in front of his face.

"Mateo, hello? Okay ka lang ba?" I waved again because he was just staring at me. He snapped out of it and stepped back, making me nervous.

"W-what? You are not k-kidding right?" he asked, his voice cracking.

"I'm serious, Mateo," I said, making my voice serious. I was surprised when he suddenly hugged me and lifted me, but then he put me down and started slapping himself.

"Luliana, fuck?! Is this for real? Am I not dreaming?" he continued slapping himself, so I grabbed his hand and smiled at him.

Tinawanan ko siya. "Totoo ito, Mateo. Hindi ka nananaginip," I said with a smile, and he hugged me again.

"Hindi ko sasayangin ang chance na ito. I will give you everything. I love you," he said. I laughed, then pulled away from the hug and wiped away his tears.

"Iyakin mo naman," he said, and started to lean in to kiss me, but then-

"Anak, Mateo, where are you? Your Grandpa Carlitos is here!" Tita shouted, making me laugh at Mateo because he was now sulking.

"The fvck?! Kahit kailan panira," I heard him mutter, making me laugh even harder. I quickly kissed him. He was about to kiss me back when I stopped him.

"One more," he pouted.

"Tumigil ka, hinahanap ka na," I said, laughing.

"Please," he begged, but I just shook my head, not giving him a chance to kiss me.

"Mateo, where are you ba?!" Tita shouted, sounding impatient.

"Sige na, labas na," I urged him.

"Just one kiss," he pleaded. I quickly kissed him.

"Thank you for this day. I love you," he said. I just nodded.

"I love you. Go na, bilis!" I told him. He turned and walked out.

Once he was out, I followed. When I got to the living room, Lolo Carlitos and Tito Carlos were there.

"Good evening po, Lolo Carlitos and Tito Carlos," I greeted them, and hugged them.

"Zy-I mean Luliana, how are you?" Lolo greeted, and I smiled back.

"I'm fine po. Kayo po kamusta po?" I replied.

"We are fine. Masigla pa rin," he said, making me laugh.

"Where is Kyle?" Tito Carlos asked. I immediately looked for Kyle and spotted him playing with Jake. I went over to them.

"Kyle, anak, tara. Your Lolo is looking for you," I said, turning to my two friends.

The two of them pouted. "Kaka-punta palang ni pogi rito, eh," Jake complained. Ella, ever the drama queen, nodded in agreement.

"Oo nga, panira ka ng moment," she whined.

"Tse! Magsitigil kayo. Mamaya na, kapag tapos mag-usap-usap ng maglolo," I said curtly, pulling Kyle away.

"Anak, meet your Lolo Carlitos. Lolo Carlitos is Lolo Carlos's father," I introduced them. Kyle politely shook hands with both his grandfathers, but then he went back to my side and hid, looking shy. Mateo just watched with a smile.

"Is this Kyle now? He grows up well. He exactly looks like me," Lolo Carlitos said, making Tito Carlos immediately object.

"He looks exactly like me. He is my younger version," Tito Carlos said proudly, but Mateo also objected, making us all laugh.

"Hell no. I am the father, so? He looks like me," Mateo said, starting a playful argument. They really do look alike.

"I am your father, Mateo. You look like me, so he is also my carbon copy," Lolo Carlitos said. I laughed.

Para silang batang nag aagawan nang laruan.

"Who is your father, Carlos? Me, right? I am the father here, so he is my carbon copy. Both of you shut up," Lolo Carlitos said, trying to win the argument.

The three of them continued their playful banter, while the others enjoyed drinks.

I felt a hug on my back. "This is the best birthday gift you ever gave me. Thank you, Luliana. I will never forget this day." he whispered as he kissed me.