Avalyn's POV.

I stood in front of the window of his office and was looking out when he sat the cup of coffee down at his table, the same coffee I refused to have moments ago.

"I know you will hate to hear this right now, but you're not doing the right thing. Think of the dangers you are putting this child in by leaving these parameters." He said as he sat on his seat. I turned around and noticed his eyes, somehow tired and probably deprived of sleep. "She's not safe here either." His eyes changed as though pained by my words. He knew I was talking about the violence he showed me years ago.

"Look me in the eyes Ava, and tell me you believe I would hurt the child I saved myself. Or that I would hurt you in any way." He leaned forward and held my gaze. So he remembered the child. The 5 year old he talked about that night. She was the same child, Maria. How much horror the child have seen, yet she smiled like an angel, pure from those evils.

His gaze was soft as though begging to be trusted, yet mine was piercing. "You can hurt me, any moment and I do not trust you around us." He was clever enough to notice how I excluded Maria. "Ava, I would never hurt you..." His voice was soft and I was actually getting used to hearing only soft tone from him, never less.

"We are leaving the country. I have made my plans. And you are no one to interfere. Though I apologise for not being able to defend you anymore. I can not risk my daughter or Avery. I was foolish to step out in front of other's target." I stepped towards the table and took a sip from the cup before putting it back, because I was feeling my head pulsing with stress and tiredness.

He suddenly stood up and took my cup from my side and put it in front of him as he sat back down again. He looked almost eager as he shifted the cup until the side I drank from came in front of his and he drank from right there. The center of my palms tingled and my hands curled at the sight of him. I hid my hands behind me because I did not want him to see the effect that gesture had on me.

"I should have protected you earlier. Maria would have been so scared." He said as he put the cup back down. His eyes genuinely sad and concerned. "She was." I said and he nodded at that. " You adopted her. I would have guessed it, if I knew you any better." He said but I didn't reply.

"Somehow you were always kind. That's probably why everyone in this house loves you so much. I had to face hell from Louis, Anna and her son, after you left. I had to eat out for months in fear of Louis poisoning my food." I couldn't help but smile at that. I missed them. And I always will.

"They felt like family." I blurted out before I could stop myself. "They still are. We all are, so please stay, Ava." He tried to convince me which angered me more. "I am leaving. And no one is changing that." I almost shouted but he didn't say anything.

"There is no where you can be safe. You must stay here to be safe. There is no other way of doing it." He said this almost like a robot with no emotions but then he took a deep breath and continued with a voice full of softness and emotions.

"That's what i should be saying, but it would be a lie if I said this. Because that's not the only reason why I'm insisting that you stay." What is up with him? Why is he being so honest now? What can he gain by this?

"I have never been selfish in my life.." He said as he stood up and walked across the table. He stood in front of me and continued, "But this once, please let me be. We need you here. I need you here." His voice was barely a whisper at the end.

"You had me once, and you lost me with no regrets at that time." I was relieved, at the fact that my voice didn't quaver one bit.

His eyes screamed of regret, desperate to hold onto something to make me stay. That was probably the first time, I was able to read his eyes with this clarity. But years have passed, what can he possibly do? I tried walking away towards the door but stopped with a jolt.

My breath hitched, the moment he held my wrist to stop me, his grip so light as if he was holding something made out of feathers.

He pleaded, while looking down at his feet, "Then... take me Ava, to where sinners go. But please take me yourself. So, I can be with you, just for a second more." His voice turned so soft at the end, just a whisper, for a moment I thought I only imagined him saying that.

That was probably the most emotional thing I've ever heard him say. But what does it change now? What difference does it make? None.

"Where sinners go... they go alone. No companions for them, unless they are sinners themselves." I said and looked away from him, only realizing that I was unconsciously looking up at him all this time.

A silence fell between us for a few seconds, which felt more like an eternity. Like I've died and woken up again. In heaven or hell, that I couldn't quite make out.

His hand moved up my wrist slowly, his skin barely touching my own. His thumb made a soft line of sensations from the base of my palm to the tip of my ring finger in slow swipe, his finger lingering a while over my tattoo. I jerking my hand free from his grip, which was not hard to do, at all.

"For God's sake, what do you want from me now!?" My eyes were as hard as my voice. "A chance to live,.... for once." He whispered. I'm not sure more to himself or me.

Please don't make me doubt my decisions. It's best to stay away from you. I'm not strong enough to face the loss again, when it comes and I know it will come.

He may not be guilty of the accusations made by the world, but he sure as hell was guilty of his mistreatment of me. He stripped me off my feathers, burnt them in front of my eyes, while all I ever wanted was to fly, in the past... with him. But it does not matter anymore. I've learnt to live alone already, without him.

The worst thing you can do to someone is ridicule them over something they were excited about. He has ridiculed me so, that now I was ashamed of ever loving him. "Then live! What do you want from me?" I turned towards him completely and bursted my anger out. "Ava, there are so many unspoken things between us. So many misunderstandings. Let's clear them up first. Please?" He tried to convince me but I've had enough.

"Clear them up for what? It does not matter anymore. You are 3 years too late! I am leaving with Maria and Avery!" I was the most angry I had been in my entire life yet he never raised his voice once. He sighed as though he is about to say something he was not supposed to, something he never wanted to. "Avery is not here anymore Ava. You can not leave with her." I was shocked and confused at his statement.

"What do you mean? Where is she? What happened to her?" I was scared now. For her. "She is safe, Tsuda took her away." My eyes widened. "Then how is she safe!? That creepy friend of yours have her! He will hurt her!" I started to walk out to save her from that man. I will get to her somehow. I have to.

He stopped me as he put his body between me and the door suddenly. "She is the safest she could ever be, trust me." I was so pissed I could hurt him right now. "He is your friend! He will hurt her just like you did!" I shoved at him and he winced because I had hurt his wound without knowing. I saw blood then on his shirt where the wound was. Oh no! What have I done! And for the first time his voice was slightly raised but not with anger but to be heard and a plea to be trusted.

"He loves her!" I was stunned at the statement. "So, he would never hurt her." His voice softened again. Love. My weakness. You can never hurt the person you love. Never. And I did not love him anymore. So why did it hurt me when I realized I had hurt him?

"Does it hurt?" I asked as my anger fled suddenly and panic for him replaced it. "Yes. It does." I awkwardly raised my hand to inspect his wound but with in a blink of an eye his hand covered mine and he pulled it away from his shoulder. "Not there." He said with softest eyes and voice as he placed it on his chest, over his heart and his thumb softly grazed over by tattoo back and forth. "Here." No! Don't you dare think for a moment that is was sweet or anything like that! In fact it was cliché and you feel repulsive over it Avalyn. That's right. I convinced myself. But deep down, I knew that I lied to myself just now.

I slipped my hand out of his hold and away from him. "I suffered for loving someone, but that's what happens when you fall in love right? Your heart breaks. So don't apologise." I told him with eyes so empty, he would fear they held no soul behind them.

"Emotions bares the biggest concequences, I have learnt." I hugged myself and walked to a couch where I sat myself down and bent my legs and put my chin on my knees. He stiffened suddenly, I could not quite get why. "I chose to love the wrong person at the wrong time. And I have faced the concequences of that. So, don't you dare pity me." He walked towards me in a blink and bent down in front of me.

Without any warning his warm big hand held my leg and he stretched it out. He knelt with one knee on the ground and examined my leg. Oh so this is what it was about. My trousers must have been pulled up and my scar would have been exposed in my position.

His hands were gentle when he grazed upon the scar and his brows were wrinkled as though in pain. And his eyes became wet again. Why is he always crying? Stop that! Men don't cry! He pulled my leg slightly up and noticed the scars under my feet. His eyes became more pained and a swirl of dark anger spread in his grey orbs. At that I wondered just how much have Avery told him. He put his forehead on my leg and suddly I felt soft lips on the scar on my leg. As though I was a child and he was kissing my pain away. Or maybe he was kissing his regrets away, trying to make himself feel better.

Wait a second! Why am I sitting still like an obedient pet? What the he** is wrong with me?

"I told you not to pity me." I said as I pulled my leg away and hugged my legs to my chest. "Ava.." I had enough, I could not bear to see the pity in his eyes and I burst out with anger again. "Do. Not. Pity. Me." I warned, emphasizing each word. He sighed at though annoyed for a moment. "I have saved many people Ava in worst situations.." His eyes were holding so much power and I looked down in his eyes as though captivated.

"And not once did I want to kiss them, so bad that it was hard to breath around them." His eyes darkened at the end of his sentence. He looked uncomfortable at the idea of considering doing something like that to those he saved. I would have laughed at his choice of words if he was not looking at me like that. "Trust me I feel many things for you. But pity is not one of them." He was still on his knee when he said that but stood up right when I jerked up and away from him.

I ran towards the door and he let me. I held the handle when he asked softly, "You will stay, right?" I looked down at my feet and whispered before I could stop myself. "... for Maria." With that I ran away from him before he could stop me or see my face which was red by now. He could pull me back in that hole I ran away from. He held the power to. And I was not naive enough to deny the truth that was right in front of both of us.

___________________________

Me: Re-reading the cup scene.