I don't think I slept at all last night, and if I did sleep then those few hours were full of nightmares. I had seen the women I met yesterday, only the women ended up being my reflection in the mirror, they pulled me in and wrapped me up in colourful dresses, gold chains bunched around my throat and when I tried to pull away from them I just fell in deeper. I woke up feeling even more tired than when I had fallen asleep.

Someone knocks at my door and I let out a low growl, I was going to be late for breakfast but I didn't want to leave my rooms.

A servant stands holding a note with my name on it. I take it, thanking her before closing the door and opening it.

My Dear Daella,

Please meet me at the South Side gazebo as soon as your lessons have finished this afternoon.

Yours, Aeris

Well at least this was more subtle.

The day drags through lessons and senseless conversation as I try to play my part. I notice Fynley and want to know how she does it. How she looks so perfect each and every day. If only we could talk by ourselves, maybe she could tell me more, give me more advice. If I could hear how she truly thinks and feels then maybe it would be easier to get through each day knowing I wasn't alone in all of this.

By the time I find the gazebo I am exhausted, my face hurts from smiling and all I want to do is go and hide somewhere and fall into a dreamless sleep.

"Daella, my dear friend," Aeris calls out as soon as he sees me waiting under the gazebo with a small white flower in his hands. He holds it out towards me and bows.

"Afternoon," I stare at the flower not sure what to do with it.

"I thought it might be fun," He says, stepping close to me and tucking the flower into my hair. "seeing as how you enjoy adventures, if we go for a horse ride together." He smiles down at me.

"I've never ridden a horse by myself, I don't know how." I admit quickly.

"Ah, that's ok, we can share one and you will ride with me." He replies quickly.

"Why did you have me meet you here instead of the stables if this was your plan?" I ask, looking around, we were some way from the stables, hidden by hedges and rose bushes.

"Well, ever since our trip to the kennels I have noticed some of the other chosen have taken quite an interest in hovering around the kennels in the afternoons." He replies.

"Oh, sorry, I might have mentioned you took me there when they asked about it." I quickly apologize.

He tilts his head, studying me. "Why do you look as if you have had no sleep and are about to hit me with something large and heavy?" He asks.

"I had trouble sleeping last night, and today's lessons have tested my patience, like most days, only I'm struggling to pretend otherwise." I answer honestly, folding my arms over my chest.

"So you don't actually want to hit me with something large and heavy?" He teases.

I smile begrudgingly. "That depends on how the afternoon goes I suppose."

"There's that little spark of fire I have missed. Come, I have horses being prepared for us."

He says holding out his elbow, I take it, falling into his stride as he leads me away from the gazebo and around the garden.

"How are the puppies and Moira?" I ask as we walk.

"They are all doing very well, Belly Rubs misses you of course, and the others." He answers.

"You're calling him Belly Rubs?"

"Of course, why wouldn't I?"

"Because it's a terrible name, I was only joking, surely you will give them all proper names."

He laughs. "Well they will be weaned soon, then they will get collars and get named."

"Good, I don't want Belly Rubs being teased mercilessly by the other dogs because of his terrible name." I reply.

He laughs again. "I would never allow such a thing to happen, I'll even let you over see the naming if you like."

I look up at him surprised. "Truly? I wouldn't know what to name them but I would like to know what you choose."

He smiles down at me. "Of course, I'm sure you would have a great many ideas for names with all the books you read, but you can be there when they receive their collars if you would like even if you don't want to name them."

"Yes I would like to be there."

"Good, I will make sure you are."

We near two guards and a stable hand waiting with two horses.

One is large and black, its coat shines as it moves restlessly, the other is a chestnut, smaller and standing still and calm.

"I did ask them to get Imra ready for you to ride, but instead you can ride with Dagon and I." He says reaching up to run his hand along the black horse's neck. The horse stills as Aeris gets closer.

"They're beautiful." I say, reaching towards Imra, I pet her neck softly, her coat soft and warm.

"Yes, Imra is my best mare, I plan to mate her and Dagon together soon, I imagine any colt they produce will be quite the horse." Aeris agrees.

He talks to the stable hand telling him to take Imra back, before turning back to me.

"Here, come meet Dagon." He says holding his hand out.

I take his hand as he moves it to Dagon's nuzzle, his breath is hot against my palm as he breathes me in.

"I named him after a dragon." Aeris tells me, standing at my back, still holding my hand, guiding me up Dagon's nose, gently moving my hand along the warm coat.

"Why a dragon?" I ask softly.

"When I was a child, I was read a story about a boy who had no friends and no family, he had nothing in the world, but he didn't let that stop him from taking what he wanted, what he believed he deserved. He learned to fight, to defend himself, then when he happened upon a dragon, instead of running away, he decided he would tame it. The Dragon was wild, had never been ridden or tamed before, but this boy was relentless, and then he won over the dragon and became a dragon rider, the first dragon rider. He led armies and grew stronger as others followed him, learning to tame and ride dragons. He started an empire, one that was stronger than any other. He didn't let the thoughts or beliefs of others stop him from taking what he wanted and what he deserved. He named the dragon Dagon, which meant light bringer. He didn't see the dragon like everyone else did, just a way to breathe fire and kill those around you, he saw Dagon as light, something he could use to wipe out the darkness."

"You'll have to tell me the title of the book so I can read it." I say as he lets go of my hand to walk towards the saddle.

"I can borrow it to you, I have the only copy in the palace." He says holding out his hand. "Now, you're going to have to sit side saddle because that dress would not fare well if we try anything else." He says as I take his hand. "Ready?" He asks with a wicked grin. He doesn't give me time to answer before he takes my waist and lifts me up setting me on the saddle. I let out a small squeal and grip the stirrup quickly. Then he is lifting himself up behind me, taking hold of the reigns.

He shifts me while his legs wrap around me and my side is pressed against the front of his body.

"Ready to have an adventure?" He asks close to my ear.

"Normally I would say yes, but right now, I'm not sure." I admit honestly. This is only the second time I have been on a horse and the circumstances are vastly different.

He laughs. "You have nothing to be scared about, you are perfectly safe with me."

His words and closeness of his body make me want to trust him. I don't have time to think about his idea of safe as he flicks the reigns and Dagon sets off. Moving at a steady pace I do my best to sit comfortably while trying to ignore Aeris wrapped around me.

We move towards a game park, trees growing up at the edge of the gardens.

Dagon speeds up and I can't help but grip Aeris' arm, he grins, he wraps the arm around my waist pulling me closer to his body. Dagon moves into the trees, he follows a trail and my eyes widen as I take everything in.

I hold my breath as the woods surround us, I look behind us, seeing nothing but trees.

It was something I had dreamed about, escaping into the woods, exploring with my brothers, creating my own adventures.

Dagon moves confidently beneath me, Aeris keeps one hand on the reign, the other wrapped around my waist.

My heart races in my chest as I try to take in everything around me, the trees, the sounds, the smells, I haven't felt this alive in, in, maybe I have never felt this alive, this awake, this free.

Aeris leads Dagon to a small stream.

"Stay there." He says close to my ear before dismounting, then he reaches up, taking my waist and pulling me down with ease.

He taps the tip of my nose with his finger before leading Dagon closer to the stream and tying his reign to the closest tree.

My eyes wander around, I can hear birds all around me, the scratching of smaller animals beneath me.

"I thought you would like it in here, I bring the dogs out here quite a lot." Aeris says coming to stand by my side.

"It's beautiful."

"Come on," He says taking my hand and leading me further into the woods. I can't see a path or trail as we walk slowly giving me time to enjoy every part. "It's quite strange being in here with someone else."

"Why did you choose to bring me here?" I ask, curious.

"There aren't many places in the palace grounds that one can enjoy without having eyes taking note of everything, or ears listening to everything. It's alright if your by yourself, you can find ways around it. But I thought you would enjoy the privacy and the tranquillity this place offers." He answers, hand still holding onto mine as we step over logs and around rocks and stumps.

"Are you planning on revealing all your secrets to me?" I tease, already feeling lighter and more myself being away from the palace and the other fae.

He laughs. "Never, you wouldn't agree to be my friend if I revealed all my secrets to you." He replies.

"So you just wanted me to enjoy some peace and quiet?"

"That and my own delightful company." He smiles at me over his shoulder. "No, I thought if you enjoyed the idea of adventures so much, that this could be your own adventure of sorts. Granted it isn't as exciting as the books you read, but, it is away from the confines of the palace walls and you have a handsome, brave prince at your side to escort you, not to mention a valiant steed in your service, and a beautiful wood to explore."

"I truly feel like I am in a day dream right now." I say, surprised by his words and the thought he had put into bringing me here, it was incredibly kind and sweet.

"Good, I'm glad my plan is working. Now, I bought you this way because there is a rock pool just ahead."

He stops and I stand beside him, sunlight streams through the trees and glows over the rock pool glinting off the water.

Then he is taking off his boots.

"Come on, take off your shoes." He says quickly.

"What?"

"Well I'm not going to suggest you take off all your clothes and go for a swim because something tells me you will be against it and be just a little angry at me for the suggestion. So take off your shoes and hold your skirt up and we can walk in the shallow part." He says, setting his boots aside and rolling up his pants.

"You're being serious?"

He stops to look at me smiling. "Are you scared?" He asks stepping closer to me.

"No." I answer, not willing to step away from him as he takes another step, stalking me.

"Your unwillingness says otherwise." He insists, inches away from me, his dark eyes looking down at me, testing me, he tilts his head.

"I'm not scared." I insist, bending over to take off my shoes and stockings, setting them on the grass.

He waits, watching while I gather up my skirts then face him with a determined expression.

He steps towards the edge of the pool, feet sinking into the water. Determined to not let him win I follow him in. The water covers my feet and I let out a sigh. It is cool and refreshing.

Aeris steps in further scooping down to pick up stones.

I follow him in, trying my best to keep my skirts dry but knowing it was impossible at this point.

Aeris starts skipping stones over the water, the small flat stones skimming and skipping over the clear calm water and I watch fascinated.

"Your turn." He says holding one out to me.

"Alright." I say, taking the stone and trying to imitate him. The stone plops into the water with a small splash and he laughs, I can't help but laugh with him.

"If you did it on your first try I would be stunned into silence." Aeris says, picking up more stones, showing me which ones were best.

"Stunned into silence, please tell me what else I can do to make that happen." I tease thinking it would most likely be impossible.

"It's a short list believe me." He replies.

I collect stones as well before showing them to him.

"Now, you need to bend your knees and hold your arm out like this." He says, coming to stand behind me, one arm on my waist, the other on my arm.

"Then, you pull back and don't just throw it, but flick it so it will run almost parallel to the water." He says before letting me go and taking a step away.

I shake off the feeling of his hands on me, distracting me, then try to do what he said. He doesn't give up, continuing to show me and guide me over and over until at last one of the stones skims the water and I let out a happy laugh.

"Well done dearest." Aeris says placing his hands on my shoulders. "I never doubted you for a moment."

I turn smiling up at him. It was such a small thing I knew but it felt like something huge. I had learnt how to skim stones, well mostly, I might need some more practice but I have the basics down.

He reaches up, tucking a strand of hair behind my ear while looking into my eyes. I feel like I could fall into them, so dark and endless, inviting me in.

"Time to head back I think." He says quietly. I want to disagree, ask for more time out here, just another hour before we had to go back. But instead I nod and smile finding my things and getting ready for the walk back.

Aeris holds my hand as we walk, guiding me around rocks and over branches until we reach Dagon.

The whole ride back I feel like I am leaving something behind as we leave the woods and move back towards the stables, I feel reality settle over me and it feels heavy, getting heavier with each day.

"Brother" Aeris calls out as we clear the gardens and I see Demwyn waiting outside the stables, arms crossed over his chest and wearing a hard expression.

"Prince Demwyn," I curtsy once Aeris helps me down. Why is he waiting for us again?

"Miss Daella, Aeris, where have you two been?" He asks.

"The wood." Aeris answers, petting Dagon before the stable hand comes to take him away.

"Without guards?" Demwyn asks looking from Aeris to me, his eyes hard as he studies me.

"Yes without guards, I don't need guards trailing my every move, they knew where we were." Aeris replies, his voice defensive while looking bored.

"You may not need your guards within the palace walls, but Miss Daella does." Demwyn replies pointing at me like he was accusing me of something.

"Are you insinuating she was in harm's way? Or just that her safety was at risk because she was with me?" Aeris replies, hand resting on the hilt of his sword.

Demwyn watches his brothers, jaw working.

"I'm not trying to insinuate anything, only that it is a rule that each chosen is to be within reach of the palace guards at all times."

Aeris lets out an irritated sigh and I feel like I shouldn't be here, while at the same time irritated at Demwyn for acting this way, his fear of the unknown seemed intent on making everything clear.

"I am aware of the rules for the chosen brother, however I am a commander in the royal army, therefore I rank higher than a palace guard. She was perfectly safe with me and came to no harm, we didn't leave the palace walls and the guards knew where we were. I broke no rules, a rarity I know, but if you do insist on taking this further, then at least allow Daella to leave and we can continue our discussion." Aeris replies, words precise and prepared.

Demwyn looks at me as I stand useless, should I attempt to defend Aeris? Would anything I say really make a difference to Demwyn?

"Very well, Miss Daella." Demwyn nods at me before turning and moving towards the stables.

"Apologies for my overly entitled brother." Aeris smiles tightly turning towards me.

"Don't worry about it. I should get going anyways, it will be evening meal soon and I don't want to be late." I say quickly.

"I would offer to walk you back like the true version of your heroic charming and devilishly handsome prince in your stories, but I'm guessing you wouldn't want that." He grins.

"No, thank you, I'm more than capable of finding my way back by myself. And as for my heroic, mildly entertaining, moderately handsome Prince, thank you for this afternoon."

He places a hand on his chest and gasps in false pain.

"You wound me fair maiden, how will my ego ever regain itself?"

"I'm sure your over inflated ego will be more than fine." I counter.

"Ah but you do think I'm handsome, I can work with moderately." He grins, holding out his hand.

I take it hesitantly, he leans forward kissing it gently.

"Until we meet again." He smiles before releasing my hand and turning on his heels, following his brother towards the stables.

By the time I reach my rooms after dinner I am ready to fall into bed, as I near my bed I find a book with a note on it on the bedside table.

Dearest Daella,

As promised, the only copy in the palace of the story I told you today. I hope you enjoy this as much as I enjoyed spending this afternoon with you.

I will wait as patiently as I am able to hear your thoughts and we are able to speak again.

Yours, Aeris

I pick up the book, smoothing my hands over the cover and smiling.

I didn't expect him to leave the book for me so quickly, I am excited to read it and to see him again, wondering where we would go next and hoping his brother didn't give him too much of a hard time, though I'm sure Aeris could defend himself against Demwyn with little effort.

"Good evening Miss," Lyari says walking into the room. I set down the book.

"Good evening,"

"Ready to get changed?" She smiles and I nod as Saena walks into the bathing room to draw the bath.

I didn't understand this feeling growing within me when I think about Aeris, like excitement but different, and something in my heart, like friendship but more.

What am I thinking? There wasn't anything more. I couldn't have anything more. I wasn't even sure if anything more was real. And if it was real then I know it couldn't for me, not with who I am, all of this anger and my temper and I am selfish and know I wouldn't be a good partner for anyone, let alone someone to love.

Love. That is what all those romance books wrote about, two people meeting and falling in romantic love, needing to be together because they couldn't be happy unless they were together. They would break rules and go against their families, they would do whatever was needed to just be together.

I laugh out loud to myself. I knew that isn't what was happening, that these new feelings weren't anything remotely close to those romantic stories that I need to stop reading and allowing them to fill my head with ridiculous ideas.

No, these feelings were just new because I had never had a friend who wasn't a family member. And Aeris showed me things and helped me experience things no one else has. He was giving me these adventures and teaching me new things. He was putting thought and effort into spending time with me for no other reason than to be my friend.

And the strange reactions my body has to being close to him, to having him hold my hand and have his arm around my waist were not because I enjoyed it or wanted it, it was because it was something new, something unexpected.

And the same applies for Alvaryn. He was a friend, someone I could talk to, share my thoughts and feelings with and have someone actually listen and respond and try to understand, not just dismiss me or ignore me or correct me.

It was that lack of fear, that lack of apprehension that made me speak and act without really thinking, but that's what friends did right? Friends were those you could be yourself around without having to worry about what they might think because they would still care for you regardless.

So there was nothing to worry about, I can just ignore these new feelings and file them away without thinking about them, because that's all it was, just something new and different but perfectly normal.