JOSEPHINE

"I'm glad to see you alive and in one piece, Josi." Valentino sat down on the sofa next to me. "Listen: I wanted to apologize to you," he continued without waiting for my reply.

Confused, I looked away from the window in front of me at him. "Why should you have to apologize? I'm the one who acted completely irrationally and rashly, not you."

"You did, didn't you?" He grinned at me. "But I noticed yesterday that you weren't feeling well and didn't do anything. Maybe if I had stayed with you—"

"It wouldn't have changed anything, Nino. Seriously. Please don't worry about it. Besides, luckily nothing worse happened," I tried to reassure him, because it was true: it wouldn't have made any difference. I had fallen into this spiral too many times, and no matter what I had tried, it had never stopped.

"Well, I would say feeding the hellhounds could be considered worse. Was Domenico very unfair to you?" He sounded genuinely concerned, and I rushed to shake my head.

"No, he was right in what he said. Besides, who knows? Maybe I'll grow fond of the beasts," I replied, and after a short moment of silence, we both laughed out loud at the same time.

"Yeah, sure. Is there more where the milkshake comes from? It looks pretty tasty." He watched the glass in my hand curiously. I offered him the glass, but he declined. "Thanks, Josi, but I'm not you. Vito wouldn't let me off so easily if he found out that I was taking your food away from you. But do you think Maria would make something like that for me if I asked her nicely?" I knew Valentino was trying to change the subject, and I was eternally grateful to him for it. It relieved me to notice no change in his behavior toward me because he somehow felt so easy to talk to. With Vito or Domenico, I was always afraid of doing or saying the wrong thing and disappointing them, but Valentino had a way about him that made it easy for me. Maybe because he avoided topics related to my past, and I hoped it would stay that way. "Well, I can see you're deep in thought. I'll come back right away, and then we'll talk about our plans for the day."

Valentino got up and disappeared, I assumed, toward the kitchen. Grinning, I took another sip as I looked back out the window. The sun had started to melt away the snow, but I could still catch only a glimpse of the garden in front of me. It would probably be beautiful like the rest of the house, and I felt childish anticipation about discovering it. Shaking my head, I was annoyed at myself for my behavior; it was just a garden! But I had never lived in a house with its own garden. Until my parents died, we lived in an apartment but visited the community garden every day. I loved that place. So much so that whenever we had to leave, I would start crying until Dad assured me we would come back the next day. Looking back, I had to admit that Dad really couldn't handle my tears very well. Would it still be the same if they were alive?

"A penny for your thoughts?" Valentino interrupted my reverie, and I tried to smile at him.

"Nothing important. Didn't you want to get a shake too?" I looked at his empty hands in surprise. Maria had told me she had made more when I took this one so that I could have another drink this afternoon.

Sighing, Valentino fell back onto the sofa next to me and rubbed his face. "Maria and I had a conversation about the topic, and we mutually decided that I didn't need one."

"Mmhmm," I simply replied, and he winked at me. "It's always nice to make a 'mutual' decision."

"Exactly. So let's change the subject and never talk about it again, okay? Especially when my older brothers are around." I put a hand over my heart and nodded. "Very good. What are your plans for today?" he asked me.

"Vito suggested I should explore the house. What are you planning to do?"

"That makes sense. He's already expressed his displeasure toward me because I didn't show you everything yesterday. May I give you some advice? It's best to make a sketch of the floor plan. I can imagine you might notice a few things. Whatever—" He took a meaningful breath. "—I have to go get some very important and, above all, secret things later. So secret, I'm not allowed to tell you about them at all."

It probably had something to do with what Vito and Domenico were doing, and in this case, I really should know as little about it as possible. Hopefully, it wasn't something that would put Valentino in a dangerous situation. However, I didn't think Vito would do such a thing. Maybe it was some office work; after all, Valentino was studying. "Okay, then have fun, and please take care of yourself."

Valentino looked dissatisfied. "Aren't you curious at all?"

I shrugged my shoulders. "Curiosity killed the cat. So no, I'm not. Besides, you said it was a secret, and secrets don't remain a secret when you tell them to others."

"Interesting. And what if only I knew where I wanted to go, but then I wouldn't come back, and only you had the opportunity to find out about my plan?"

By now, I was feeling irritated. What did he want? Should I know now or should I not? "Right, but in this case, at least Vito knows. No offense, but if I'm honest, I don't understand the point of our conversation right now."

Valentino looked at me for a few moments and then laughed quietly, shaking his head. "None taken. In our family, it's usually impossible to keep secrets because everyone here is far too curious for their own good, so I was a little surprised by your reaction. Whatever, I still have to go straight away. Would you like to join me?"

"Now I don't understand anything anymore. I thought I wasn't supposed to know? And if you can't or don't want to tell me, then the least I can do is respect your wishes. After all, I want the same thing the other way around."

Valentino sighed and put his arm around me to pull me closer to him. It was probably meant to be harmless, but I still involuntarily stiffened. He seemed to notice and gave me more space again. "Is everything okay?" he asked this time in a serious tone, and I nodded silently. "It's okay if it's not like that. You know that, right?"

I nodded again while staring out the window. He tried to remove his arm, but I quickly asked him not to. Now he was the one who was confused, but instead of explaining it to him, I tried to shift my attention away from the bad thoughts in my mind and toward the current situation, and that was simple: Valentino didn't mean danger. I repeated the thought over and over in my head until my body gradually relaxed. Valentino radiated warmth; that was the first thing I noticed. A few moments later, I was leaning against him. We stayed in this position for a while; I, because I continued to concentrate on not reacting by running away, and he, probably because he didn't want to disturb me.

"I think this is the first 'just because' hug I've gotten in a very long time," I murmured quietly into the silence.

"Then we'll have to make sure it's not the last. What do you think?" Valentino replied, and I nodded with a cautious smile. "And now that we've already hugged, I'm obliged to let you in on my secret mission. However, it's not particularly exciting; Vito asked me to get you a slightly softer surface than the floor to sleep on, and I wanted to take the opportunity to get a few clothes in your actual size. Would you like to come with me?"

I shook my head hastily. Even if he would be with me, I didn't want to risk falling into old patterns and disappearing at the first opportunity. And I would have tried that, no doubt. "I already have enough."

"Josi, you can't walk around in sweaters that reach down to your knees. Not to mention, you don't have any pants that fit properly. But if you don't want that, then you are free to go to Vito and tell him." It was a trap, and I fell into it blindly. Of course, he knew that I would never dare to actively talk to Vito about it. "That's what I thought. Do you have any style you prefer?"

I didn't, so I said the first thing that came to mind. "Something I can hide myself in."





Hello there!

Sorry for the short chapter but during some personal circumstances I couldn't find enough energy to write more. Thats the same reason why this chapter is so ... medium.

Anyway, I haven't spoke about the statics for a long time so here it comes:

How old are you all?

Private 22%

over 45 years old 3%

35 to 45 years old 4%

25 to 35 years 17%

18 to 25 years 43%

13 to 18 years 11%

and 13 to 18 years 17% (which did suprise me, I thought it would be more in that range)

And we reached a total of 2504 Reads till now and I am so thankful for everyone who takes the time to read my little story! You're the best ♥

For todays uplifting question: What helps you when you feeling down?

See you soon (hopefully)!