Chapter 58

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I PACED BACK and forth, my nails digging into my teeth as I bit them anxiously. My hair was a chaotic mess, strands falling over my face as I raked my fingers through it with a frustrated groan. Tears brimmed in my eyes, threatening to spill, but I stubbornly blinked them back, refusing to let them fall.

“My lady,” Sebastian’s deep voice broke through my turmoil.

I spun around and seized his collar, yanking him closer. My gaze locked onto his, sharp and unyielding.

“Shut up, will you?” I snapped, my voice trembling with barely restrained fury. “I don’t want your comfort. I want answers.” My grip tightened on his collar, my chest heaving as the weight of confusion and anger crushed me. “This wasn’t what I expected. I can’t remember—what else should I remember?!” My words spilled out in a frantic stream. Why would Kyro done that to me? “A novel? An infuriating game? What the hell is she talking about?! I endured it all, and now she’s just playing with me? Does she have a death wish?”

Sebastian’s sudden movement startled me. He pulled me into his arms, holding me tightly against his chest. The warmth of his embrace, so steady and secure, caught me off guard.

“Faerie, is it?” he murmured softly.

My breath hitched. That name... I froze. It clawed at memories I had buried deep, memories I thought were long gone. Faerie. That name belonged to someone I had left behind, locked away when I decided to live as Arthemice and carry out her revenge. Yet here it was, dragged back to the surface, ripping through the persona I had painstakingly constructed.

“She fooled me,” I whispered hoarsely, the words trembling on my lips. “She just wanted me to suffer. For what? Because I created this world? Because I wrote it? None of this makes sense—I don’t remember creating a world this cruel.”

I buried my face in his chest, my tears soaking into his uniform as I let my composure crumble. My shoulders shook, and the sobs I had been holding back burst free. “Sebastian,” I choked, my voice cracking, “all of them... they were captured because of me, weren’t they?” My heart twisted painfully. “Cecelia, Darious, Zacharias, Lumine... they didn’t deserve this.” My voice dropped to a whisper. “They won’t burn. I’ll make sure of it. I swear.”

Sebastian gently cupped my face, his emerald-green eyes filled with a mixture of concern and determination. “No, it’s not your—”

I cut him off, pressing a finger to his lips. “Save that advice for later,” I said quietly, my voice steadier now. I took a deep breath, pulling myself together. The vulnerability I had shown moments ago felt foreign, out of place. Straightening, I pushed the weakness aside and lifted my chin.

I shot Sebastian a sharp glare, masking my lingering turmoil. “Don’t look at me like that,” I muttered. “This is your fault for making me lean on you.” My lips curled into a sardonic smile, though my chest ached with conflicting emotions. A bitter laugh escaped me. ‘How ironic. You, of all people, chose my side instead of hers. Arthemice. Your one true love,’ I thought.

“Sebastian,” I called, my voice quieter than I intended. His grip on my waist tightened slightly as he hummed in response, waiting for me to speak.

“Will you... will you let me remember all of my past memories?” I finally asked, my words measured but laced with desperation. I knew the weight of what I was asking. Sebastian’s ability wasn’t something he used lightly—he could alter or erase memories at will.

His brows knitted together, his expression darkening. “Why would you want to remember them?” he asked, his voice low and edged with caution. His gaze bore into mine, sharp and unrelenting, as if trying to decipher my true intentions. “Don’t tell me you—”

“No,” I interrupted firmly, shaking my head. “I want to remember everything.” My voice faltered slightly as I continued, my thoughts spinning in circles. “Kyro... he must have had a reason for what he did to me. It wasn’t just about the company. Mr. Verde also, wouldn’t have kept me close without a purpose.”

Sebastian’s brows furrowed, a flicker of confusion crossing his face. His grip on my waist loosened slightly as he tilted his head ever so slightly, his emerald eyes narrowing. He clearly didn’t understand what I was talking about, but he didn’t interrupt me. Instead, he remained silent, his lips pressed into a thin line as he studied me intently.

I barely noticed his reaction, too lost in my own spiraling thoughts. “Why would someone like me—a peasant—end up married to a man with such a perfect life? None of this adds up.”

His confusion deepened, his eyes darting over my face as if searching for some clarity. Despite the clear lack of understanding, he stayed quiet, listening as I continued.

“And the novel... the game,” I whispered, my voice trembling. “If I created all of this, why can’t I remember it? Why does it feel like someone else wrote my story, twisted it into something I never intended?”

Sebastian’s lips parted slightly as though he wanted to ask something, but he caught himself, his expression softening. He let out a quiet breath, his confusion giving way to a determined calm as he chose to remain a silent observer of my unraveling thoughts.

“Faerie.” His voice broke through my spiraling turmoil, firm but gentle enough to bring me back to reality.

“I...” I hesitated, catching my breath.

“If that’s what you want,” he muttered, his voice softer now. “I’ll do it for you.” He turned his face away slightly, a hand coming up to cover his mouth. A faint blush crept across his cheeks.

I blinked, startled. Was he... blushing? “What are you blushing about?” I tilted my head, incredulous. “The world is falling apart, and this is what you choose to focus on?”

He finally released my waist, rubbing the back of his neck sheepishly. “I just... I just think it’s nice,” he admitted, his eyes flickering to meet mine. “Calling you by your real name. It feels... right.”

I scoffed, pressing my fingers to my temple in exasperation. “Oh, my god, Sebastian,” I muttered, shaking my head. “We can discuss your sentimentality later.” Gripping his shoulders, I gave him a firm shake.

He chuckled, the sound light despite the tension lingering in the air. Reaching out, he tucked a stray strand of hair behind my ear. “I know, my lady,” he said with a faint smile. “I was just trying to lighten your mood.”

His smile lingered as he continued, “So, let’s bring those memories of yours back, hmm?” Without waiting for my response, he pulled me into another embrace. His head rested against my shoulder, and I felt the warmth of his breath against my neck. My heart gave an unexpected throb at the closeness.

“Thank you, Sebastian,” I murmured, my voice soft as I closed my eyes and rested a hand on his head. “Thank you... for staying with me.”

Before he could respond, a sharp pain sliced through my mind. My breath hitched as a searing light filled my vision, turning everything hazy. The world around me blurred, and the sensation of Sebastian’s embrace faded into nothingness.

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I stepped out of the room, the scene before me hazy but oddly familiar... That was me. It was me, but I couldn’t quite place where or when.

Suddenly, a voice broke through my thoughts.

“Is that your true face?”

I jumped, startled, nearly smacking Sebastian in the chest. He appeared out of nowhere, his dark eyes glinting with amusement.

“What are you doing here?” I demanded, my brows furrowed in confusion. This was my memory, wasn’t it? So what was he doing in it?

Sebastian leaned casually against the doorframe, as if this were just another ordinary moment. “I wanted to see what kind of world you’re living in.” His lips curled into a playful smile, the kind that tried to coax me into some form of acceptance.

I rolled my eyes, exhaling a long, exasperated sigh. “Fine,” I muttered, crossing my arms. “It would be boring to watch this alone, anyway.” I paused, a thought striking me. “Besides, you also need to understand why I ended up in this body. You almost killed me when you realized I’d taken over your love’s body.”

Sebastian chuckled, and for a moment, I couldn’t help but raise an eyebrow. “What’s so funny about that?”

Before he could answer, the sound of footsteps echoed from down the hall, drawing my attention. The scene around me shifted again, and I felt a tug in my chest. It was like I was watching a play, one that I should have known, but I couldn’t quite remember...

‘Kyro!’

I called out to him, smiling brightly as I held up an iPad, the screen reflecting the joy in my eyes.

‘Faerie!’ Kyro’s voice rang out with excitement, his grin wide enough to reach his ears. ‘I got an email from the publishing house! Your novel got approved!’

Without hesitation, he lifted me off the couch and twirled me around, laughing as he spun us both.

‘Wait, I’m feeling dizzy!’ I giggled, clutching onto him, but he kissed me passionately, and I kissed him back, swept up in the moment.

My head throbbed suddenly, and I brought a hand to my temple. The memory was so vivid, so real, but the ache in my chest grew. How could I have forgotten that? Why did I forget how happy Kyro was for me?

I looked over at Sebastian, who had an unreadable expression on his face. His eyes were narrowed, his jaw clenched. I noticed the veins in his neck bulging slightly, as though he were holding something back.

“Too quiet, huh?” I said, unable to resist the jab. His gaze flickered to mine, but he didn’t respond—he didn’t need to. He was clearly bothered by the memory, but he kept silent.

The scene shifted again, and I found myself sitting at a table in a room that seemed too empty. No one came to visit me here.

‘It’s okay, love...’ Kyro’s voice was soft as he stood by my side, his hand gently resting on my shoulder. He moved in front of me, handing me a book.

‘I’ll be your first reader, yes?’ he asked, his eyes sparkling. ‘Can you sign this for me, and write a dedication?’

His smile was bright, teasing, and I was about to speak when he suddenly pouted, pressing his index finger to my lips. ‘You can’t say no! I’m the first one here, so!’

His cheerfulness was infectious, and I couldn’t help but laugh. I kissed him lightly on the lips, the warmth of his love wrapping around me like a comforting embrace.

‘Thank you, love...’ I whispered, my voice thick with emotion.

I lingered on the scene, my heart aching as I watched myself in such bliss, so carefree, so full of hope. This had been the dream I clung to when I was trapped in the basement. But now, I couldn’t understand how I had forgotten it. How had I forgotten this side of Kyro? This side of us?

Why did it all change so drastically?

“Ughhh, I can’t stand this, my lady!” Sebastian’s voice cut through my reverie, his frustration clear as he stepped forward. “Can we skip these memories and get to the more... reliable parts?”

I glanced at him, unsure of what to say. His face was twisted in irritation, the lines of his expression tight as if the whole situation were unbearable.

I rolled my eyes once more, resigning myself to the fact that he wasn’t about to let me wallow in this forgotten past. “Fine…” I muttered, though a part of me wanted to stay in the warmth of those memories a little longer.

At that, Sebastian’s face brightened slightly. He seemed pleased by my agreement, and the scene around us shifted once again. This time, the air grew colder, and darkness seemed to press in on all sides, swallowing the light.

‘Kyro... What the heck are you doing?!’ Mrs. Verde’s voice was sharp, slicing through the air as she stood abruptly. Her hands grabbed her son’s collar, yanking him toward her, her eyes flashing with icy fury. ‘Why are you wasting your time on a girl who’s nothing? A nobody?’

Kyro’s gaze dropped, his eyes dull and lifeless as she stared him down.

‘Remember, Kyro,’ she continued, her voice colder than ice. ‘You’re the next heir to the company. Not the son of that dead woman. I worked my entire life for this. You owe me everything.’ Her grip on his collar tightened, her tone dripping with venom. ‘I gave you everything, and this is how you repay me?’

The sound of his knees hitting the floor echoed in the room as Kyro knelt before her, his posture defeated, like a man already dead inside. His forehead pressed into her lap, his expression vacant—too hollow to be real.

‘Yes, mother.’ The words were nothing more than an echo, a whisper that held no life.

“Mama’s boy,” Sebastian scoffed quietly beside me, the derision in his tone unmistakable. I shot him a sharp glare, but he just cleared his throat, straightened, and fell into silence.

Then, my gaze snapped back to the scene before me. The next moment hit like a punch to the gut.

‘I’m sorry, Miss, but your novel has been banned,’ a woman said, her words cutting through the quiet of the room. I saw myself kneeling before her, the words feeling so real, so heavy.

‘But why?’ My voice trembled as I looked up at the woman, pleading with her, my heart sinking.

‘The Knight’s Love,’ she explained coldly, ‘has caused severe depression among some readers. The themes... they’re too much. Too many scenes that could negatively affect their mental health.’

‘But I just got popular! Why now?!’ The words spilled out of my mouth, but they sounded so hollow, as if my voice didn’t belong to me anymore.

‘I’m sorry.’

I pressed my hands to my chest, feeling the weight of her rejection settle deep in my bones. My head throbbed as the memory swirled. Right. I had dreamt of becoming an author since I was young, but life had never been kind to me. I was raised in an orphanage, so I had to choose a course that would make me rich, that would repay the kindness of those who raised me.

‘Kyro!’ I cried out, my heart breaking as I saw him pull me into a tight embrace.

‘They banned it,’ I whispered, the pain of the loss still fresh. His eyes were empty—dead—but he held me, his arms tight around me as if to keep me from falling apart.

‘Don’t worry,’ he said, his voice dull, ‘We’ll come up with an alternative. We’ll make sure they never, ever...’ His voice trailed off, but the emptiness behind his words filled the room.

I blinked, and suddenly, the scene changed again. I was no longer in the comfort of his arms but in front of an angry, raging figure.

A loud slap cracked through the air, landing hard against Kyro’s face. ‘What are you doing?!’ Mr. Verde’s voice thundered as he stepped toward Kyro, his face twisted with fury. ‘Are you trying to ruin our company’s reputation?’

Kyro’s eyes flickered with fear as his father continued. ‘Is this all for a girl? Did your mother never teach you how to act like a man? A patriarch? What are you doing, acting like a puppet?!’

His father sneered, his voice dripping with contempt. ‘I knew it. My first son is far more capable of being the heir than you!’

My heart sank as Mr. Verde gripped Kyro’s chin, forcing him to look up. The fear in Kyro’s eyes was unmistakable—frozen and terrified, like a child being scolded by a cruel parent.

‘She has no talent. All she can do is design. You should find someone else more worthy.’

‘Yes, father,’ Kyro mumbled, his voice barely audible.

I winced, a wave of understanding hitting me. So this was it. This was why he acted so distant, so cold. Now I could see it clearly—the manipulation that bound him to his parents’ expectations.

The scene shifted again. I found myself sitting beside Kyro, our bodies close, but the air between us was anything but warm.

‘Love, I’m sorry...’ I said softly, the guilt rising in my chest.

‘Sorry for what?’ Kyro asked, his hand gently caressing my back as we sat on the sofa, watching the night sky through the open window.

‘For being selfish,’ I confessed, the words slipping out of me before I could stop them.

Yes, you’re selfish, Faerie. The thought echoed in my head. You made him hate you. You made him choose them over you.

Kyro’s fingers paused on my back, and he pulled away slightly to look at me. ‘What are you talking about?’ he said, his voice soft, but something in it still seemed empty. ‘I’m just doing this so you can be happy. If you’re happy—’

“Skip! What the hell is wrong with this guy?!” I snapped, my irritation rising. Without thinking, I struck Sebastian on the nape of his neck, my patience finally snapping.

“You—what the heck are you doing?” I demanded, glaring at him.

Sebastian winced, rubbing the spot where I hit him. “That hurts, my lady,” he muttered, though the hint of amusement in his voice didn’t escape me.

Just as I was about to respond, the scene around us flickered, distorting like a broken mirror, and I was suddenly in a hospital room. The sterile smell of antiseptic filled my nose, and everything felt too real. My heart raced as I looked around, the memory twisting and warping as if it were never meant to be remembered.

‘What happened to her?!’ Kyro’s voice cracked, the panic and disbelief carving through each word. His hands gripped the edge of the hospital bed, his knuckles stark white against the metal. His wide, frantic eyes searched her unconscious face as though willing her to wake up.

The mingling with the relentless beep of the heart monitor. Every sound, every smell, seemed magnified in the suffocating silence of the hospital room.

‘She overdosed,’ the doctor said bluntly, his voice clinical and devoid of emotion. ‘Too many antidepressants in one day. She’s in a coma. If she wakes up… there’s a high possibility she’ll suffer memory loss.’

The words hit Kyro like a physical blow. His legs buckled, and he sank heavily into the chair by her bedside. ‘No,’ he whispered, his voice trembling as his gaze dropped to her limp hand. Slowly, he reached for it, his fingers trembling. ‘No, what have you done?’

His breath hitched, and a desperate cry tore from his throat. ‘I—I gave you everything! I tried to make you happy! I thought… I thought I was helping…’ His voice broke, and he buried his face in his hands, his shoulders shaking with silent sobs.

Mrs. Verde’s voice sliced through the fragile air, calm yet cutting. ‘Kyro, you need to let this go.’ She stepped into the room, her cold gaze sweeping over the scene. ‘She’s been a burden on you from the start. Look at what she’s done to herself—and to you.’

‘No!’ Kyro’s head snapped up, his voice sharp but shaky. His red-rimmed eyes glared at his mother. ‘This… this isn’t her fault. It’s mine.’ He turned back to her fragile form, the machines keeping her alive reflecting his own failure. ‘I pushed her too far. I made her feel like she wasn’t enough, like she had to change… I didn’t see—’ His voice broke again.

Mrs. Verde opened her mouth to speak, but Kyro cut her off, his tone colder now. ‘Please leave.’

‘Kyro—’

‘I said leave!’ His shout echoed in the small room. The authority in his voice was unfamiliar, even to him. Mrs. Verde hesitated before spinning on her heel and exiting, the door clicking shut behind her.

Alone with her, Kyro slumped forward, his forehead resting against the edge of the bed. ‘I’m sorry,’ he whispered, his voice raw with anguish. ‘If you wake up, I swear… I’ll be better. I’ll give you the freedom you need. I won’t—’ He choked on the words, his guilt constricting his throat.

The only response was the steady beep of the machines, a cruel reminder of how far he’d let me fall.

“Now, he got—” I silenced Sebastian by pressing my hand to his mouth.

“Stop commenting, and let’s go back,” I said, my voice barely above a whisper. Sebastian froze, clearly shocked by my abrupt words.

“But we haven’t delved into—”

“Let’s go back, Sebastian,” I interrupted, my voice low, heavy with a quiet finality. “I understand everything now. So... let’s go back.”

There was a moment of silence, before I felt his fingers wrap around mine, warm and steady—just like before. A small, almost imperceptible squeeze.

Kyro had once cared for me. He had been so gentle, so willing to protect me, even when I hadn’t deserved it. Yet, all I did was chase my dream, selfishly pursuing it at the cost of everything else. I had used him—never fully realizing the weight of what I was asking from him.

But he learned. Oh, how he learned.

He locked me in that basement because he was exhausted—exhausted from protecting me, from carrying a burden he never asked for. He was as trapped as I was. Trapped in a game he never chose to play. Trapped in a web of expectations and lies, each thread tightening around him until there was no way out.

I closed my eyes, the pain in my head intensifying as my thoughts tumbled over each other. Kyro... I whispered his name in my mind, but it felt hollow, as though the words no longer belonged to me. The ache spread—blurring the line between memory and reality.

‘How could I have hated him?’ I thought. When, from the very beginning, it was my fault. It was me who put him in that position. He wasn’t hurting me—he was just returning the favor.

And then, the novel.

The pieces finally clicked into place. Now, I understood why Arthemice wanted me to experience her life, to feel her suffering, her pain.

At first, I thought I was simply crafting a story, smiling as I wove her pain into the plot. I didn’t care what happened to her—it was all for the sake of the narrative. Her suffering made the story compelling, didn’t it? But now, I see it clearly. She wasn’t just a character. She was real, living out the torment I had so carelessly written, as though her life was mine to shape.

Every wound I had placed on her... she had felt it. Every moment of agony... she had endured it.

She didn’t deserve any of it.

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“My lady!”

I was jolted awake by someone shaking me. My eyelids fluttered open, and the first thing I saw was Sebastian’s face hovering above me, panic etched into every line of his expression.

Before I could process anything, his arms wrapped around me in a tight hug.

“I thought you’d never wake up,” he murmured, his voice trembling just enough to betray the emotions he was trying to suppress.

Huh? My brows furrowed as my lips pressed into a thin line. What the heck is he doing?

“You’re overreacting,” I muttered, flicking my finger against his forehead.

He leaned back slightly, rubbing the spot where I’d flicked him, but there was a small smirk playing on his lips. “I know,” he replied, his tone laced with playful mischief.

I rolled my eyes, but a tiny smile tugged at the corners of my mouth despite myself.

Sebastian rose to his feet with the same effortless grace he always carried. Extending a hand toward me, he said, “Now that you’ve found your answers, shall we go and face her?”

I stared at his outstretched hand for a moment, a strange mix of determination and calm washing over me. Taking his hand, I allowed him to pull me up.

“Yes,” I said firmly, meeting his gaze. “We will.”

fin.