"Bro, what is you even going through my shit for!? Chance, that shit weird." Meadow yelled from across the room

"The fuck you mean! I'm asking you a fucking question and you're snapping on me." I yelled back

"No, you snooping around my house and shit! Like that shit pissing me off. Don't look around my house fa shit, I don't give a fuck what it is!" He walked into the bathroom connected to his room

He was only in there for so long before I followed behind him. "Meadow, how is that snooping? Because you had some shit in your cabinet, the fuck is you even hiding stuff from me? I'm your girlfriend, and you can't even tell me about your damn past, and mental health disorders!? What type of shit is that?"

"Everything ain't your business, fuck can you do for me if I was to tell you shit going on in my life?" He turned to me

Tears flowed down my face, what did he even mean by that? What he said made me feel like I'm an outsider, not even apart of his life honestly

I was his girlfriend at the end of the day, we talked to the sun came up about anything, and he couldn't tell me about his mental health

I understood him keeping the fact he was SA'd inside, but not telling me that he was schizophrenia? Not telling me that he was meds? That he wasn't even taking...

Then for him to say that "fuck can you do for me if I was to tell you shit going on in my life?" I'm literally apart of his life, what did he mean?

"You crying right now, boa?" Meadow sucked his teeth with a look of disgust on his face

"I don't wanna talk anymore." I started to walk out, and he pulled me back

"Chance, chill." He sighed

"I'm chill, Meadow. Just leave me alone." I used my free hand to wipe my face

"I'm not finna let you walk away, and you crying."

"You're the reason that I'm fucking crying! I just want you to leave me be before you make it worse, damn." I mugged him

He frowned up at me. "You overreacting right now because I didn't tell you some shit that you never even asked about."

"Acting like I lied to you or sum." He mugged

"Does it matter? And you're the one overreacting, going off about me being sneaky and other things. I'm not being sneaky at all, I wasn't looking for that shit! You're being sneaky for hiding it and not letting me know what's up." I responded as he let go of my arms

"I'm not being no fucking sneaky, it's what the fuck I went through. You not being considerate of how the fuck I feel."

I just laughed, he was turning the whole conversation. "You're changing the whole fucking subject right now." I shook my head, still laughing

"How? Nigga, what?" He smacked his lips

"How could I even know how you feel if you immediately started snapping on me? You called me all types of sneaky because I wanted to know what MY boyfriend got going on inside his head? Are you listening to yourself right now?" I almost yelled

"I came to you with the papers and pill because I want to know about your mental disorders, anything could happen. You're literally suffering in silence, and it's a problem for me to ask... as your fucking girlfriend?" I went on

"Chance, it don't got nothing to do with you." He said softly and shrugged

"Alright, Meadow." I nodded and pulled the door knob, walking out of the door

I didn't think that he was understanding what I meant at all and it was making me mad

Him having Bipolar Disorder and Schizophrenia had everything to do with me. For one, it's my job to check on him and know what's wrong because who else is going to do it. And for two, he could end up lashing out on me

People with those disorders deadass kill people, and it's a problem for me being worried. I need to know how to maneuver with that

Him being SA'd wasn't something that I just expected him to tell me, but it would've been nice to know. Either way, he shouldn't have went off on me for asking

"Dumb ass nigga." I said under my breath as I walked out of the bedroom

I didn't even want to go home either because we were just now seeing each other from going to Palm Coast. He stayed for two weeks which I found odd, but he later told me his aunt stayed out there

I still couldn't believe he asked what I could do for him... I could definitely do a lot more him than he can for himself if he's literally just battling it all by himself

According to the papers, he hadn't even been to his doctor appointed therapist in months

"That shit is so fucking dumb." I mumbled as I went to sit on the couch

Both of our plates or Chinese food was on the coffee table, so I grabbed mine along with my phone

We were watching "Them" together before I found what he was "hiding" in his fucking nightstand drawer. I turned the TV back on

I guess since he heard the TV turn on, he came out of the room. "The fuck? I thought we was supposed to watch this shit together."

I didn't reply because I didn't care, he huffed and came to sit next to me. He did exactly what I did, grabbed his food, and started to watch the show

I side-eyed him, but nonetheless kept watching the show since I just wanted some peace and quiet

★

"You don't wanna go out? It's boring." I told Serayah, we were on the phone

It was only around 7, so we could've at least went out to eat. I didn't want to be cooped up

After finishing my food earlier, I almost instantly fell asleep on Meadow's couch

When I woke up he was gone which wasn't shocking or nothing like that, I was just bored

"We just went out yesterday, I thought you were spending the weekend with yo' boo." She laughed

"Girl, he being weird. We started arguing, and he made me cry. I'm still over here though." I shook my head

"Bitch, please. I would've left."

"For your information, he picked me up and bro, I didn't even want to leaveeee." I pouted

"I hadn't seen him in a minute and wanted to be under him is the worst part about it, but after what was said I was just like fuck it." I shrugged my shoulders while reflecting on the argument

"What happened?" She questioned

"I'm not even about to speak on it, but it wasn't the problem that made me feel away... it was just him speaking to me the way he did." I shrugged

The topic was so personal, and I knew he didn't even want to tell me, so he damn sure didn't want Serayah to know. I kept the details to myself

"A lot of dudes just be taking all their anger out in arguments, so they talk reckless." She reasoned

"Definitely." I nodded slowly

"Okay anyway, what's the move?" I changed the subject quick since I really did want to go to get something to eat with my best friend

"Yeah we can go get something to eat." She nodded

"Ima send you my location while I get ready, byeeee." I said quickly and hung up

Since I was sleep for a couple hours, I went and brushed my teeth and washed my face

I had clothes over his house in one of his drawers and closet, so before picking them out I shared my location with Serayah

For my outfit, I just but on a black bodycon with spaghetti straps and black Gucci slides

I put on lotion, deodorant, and some perfume as well before making sure I had everything in my purse

My hair was jet black, 32 inch, straight and I only needed to flat iron really

So while waiting on Serayah, I was just flat ironing my hair and playing music off of my phone

In the midst of it, Meadow came back which caused me to suck my teeth

And of course he came to mess with me. "Where you goin'?" He questioned

He was in the bedroom, putting the duffle bag he had down and kicked it under the bed

I ignored his question, so he walked into the bathroom. "You heard me, where the fuck you goin'?"

I sucked my teeth with a heavy huff, then continued to do my makeup

If he keep bothering me, I'm doing a lot more than just out to eat

"Silent treatment ain't go'n faze me." He bent down, putting something in his sink cabinet

His hand went on my neck, and he started to kiss on my neck, cheek, and lips repeatedly

I wasn't about give in because he had me fucked up, I kept a frown on my face as I tried to move from him

"I'm finna burn you, stop!" I yelled because my escape was not successful

He pulled back, and decided to stand behind me with his hands on my waist. His head went into the crook of my neck which was dumb, so easy to get burned

I didn't even care, his advances still weren't about to make me to talk to him or show him any attention, physically or verbally

I continued on flat ironing my hair, then unplugged it

Since I needed him off me, I purposely moved my body backwards forcefully which made him go into the door

I thought he was finna put belt to my ass, and we be tussling, but he let me walk away and I grabbed my lipgloss

"If Ian sleep in bed wit' you, Ima come find yo' ass." He spoke as I was about to walk out the room

I said I wasn't, but I turned on my heels and looked at him. "I don't care, bring Dora with you."

He ain't even have shit to say, I left out because Serayah had texted me and said she was here like a couple minutes ago, but I wasn't done

I made it down his long ass driveway, and hopped in her passenger seat

"Bitch, I fucking hate you!" Serayah said as soon as I got in

"What? What I did?" I frowned in pure confusion while putting on my seatbelt

"You said this boy didn't know how to eat pussy, and you was done fucking wit' him when I had came to get you that one time! Now he yo' nigga?"

Realization made me nervously laugh. "Well, I lied. It was because of something else." I fake smiled

"You gotta forgive for lying." I laughed

"I don't even give a fuck, where we eating at?" She started to turn the AC up

"I want Chili's or Benihana." I shrugged

"I just had Benihana, but either one is good." She said