Matteo had basically avoided Spade like the plague since he found out the truth He couldn't bear to look at the man the same way again. He'd trusted Spade so much that he felt more than betrayed

Greg was his father, and that made Nate his brother, this was so fucking overwhelming and wrong All his life he thought Micheal was his father, so he was right after all, he was the reason Micheal hated them all.

He was the cause of all the abuse they had to suffer as kids, how did he never know that the reason Micheal turned against them and became and abusive ass was because of him?

He didn't even know how to feel at the moment, a truth he had believed for so long turned out to be a lie, now he was stuck. Micheal was a bad father, but he didn't think Greg was any better either.

The man had literally raped his mother and he was the result of that rape. He broke a perfect family. If he was never born Micheal would never have known about what happened, and he would never have accused his mother of being a cheat.

To even think he'd met Greg before and the man never showed any sign that he knew, or maybe he didn't. It was all so confusing He ran his hands down his face.

He'd been seeing Spade's call for the past 24 hours but he didn't have it in him to pick it, what would he say? Of course Spade would want to apologise but he didn't think he wanted that right now.

An apology wasn't what he wanted at the moment, he didn't think it would stop whatever he was feeling now. Everything was just tumbling down for him.

He went on for years being a DeVille, now he didn't know if he had to change his name from that to Miller, was he even a Miller to begin with? He definitely knew he hated Greg for what he'd done, especially to his mother.

Imagine having to carry such a burden for so long, suffering at the hands of their father because he thought she'd cheated on him. But Spade, why exactly did Spade keep it from him?

He knew why but Spade had so many years after he'd grown up to come out clean to him, but he didn't. For years he watched Matteo and never once did it occur to him to tell Matteo that Micheal was not his father.

He didn't want to blame Spade but he couldn't help it, he didn't think Spade could keep something this big from him for years.

The doorbell went off and he looked at the door, ignoring it, if it was Spade he didn't want to talk to him, and he didn't pray for it to be Stefano either, because this was a bad time for the man to show up here.

He faced the empty space in front of him again, hoping to continue his thinking but the person at the door had different plans as the doorbell went off again.

Matteo's resisted the urge to groan out, he slowly got up, picking his pistol up from the table, he hoped whoever was behind that door wasn't Stefano or Spade, because he just might shoot them.

He walked towards the door, he peeped through the hole but didn't see anyone, this better not be some nut job's sick idea of a joke. He turned the knob, his pistol in one hand as he pulled the door open, almost ready to shoot when he looked and saw Nate standing there, a calm and collected look on his face

"Hi Matteo" he whispered, the blonde just clenched his jaw and looked around, he hadn't really spoken to Nate either since he found Nate was his brother.

"What are you doing here Nate" he deadpanned, the young man just shrugged.

"I came to check on you" he whispered out and Matteo just bit his inner cheek, he really wanted to be alone right now "can I come in"? Nate asked He couldn't turn the young man down, it's not as if Nate had done anything to him.

If anything he was just as much a victim as he was, he sighed out and stepped out of the doorway, Nate walked into the house and Matteo just shut the door, before he turned around and walked around Nate.

He could see the way Nate looked at the place in fascination, he forgot the young man had never been here before. "So this is what the penthouse looks like" Nate mused, his eyes crinckling with amusement.

"What can I get you"? Matteo asked "gin, whiskey" Nate just shook his head

"I'm good" he sighed out before he sat at the couch, his nose scrunched up at the whiskey bottles Matteo had scattered on his glass table. He looked up at Matteo and the blonde didn't really look bright eyed or his usual self

Matteo just sighed out and plopped himself on the couch next to Nate, he didn't say anything as he stared in front of him, neither of them were saying anything

Matteo didn't know what to say or if he was meant to say anything at all, what would you even say to someone you just found out is your brother?

"Matteo" Nate called, the blonde just hummed not looking at him "are you okay"? He asked tenderly.

Matteo didn't answer, his mind was doing a flip, a tumble. How did he never see that Nate was his brother, he'd spent a lot of time around Nate, and yet not once could he guess it that the young man was his brother, although he wouldn't deny he felt a kind of pull towards the young man, but then he thought it was just friendship bond or something.

He felt warm hands on his shoulder, making him to turn and look at Nate, seeing the warmth in his brown eyes, he couldn't be angry at Nate. None of this is his fault. His father nay have raped Matteo's mother but he's not his father. "You know you don't have to carry this alone" Nate muttered.

He just quickly looked away from Nate, all these years he thought Spade was the only other family he had, but he was wrong, he had two other family members, Nate and his sister. His heart was filled with so many emotions at the moment.

"Did he ask you to come talk to me"? He grunted out

"Who? Spade"? Nate asked and he nodded "No he didn't, actually he doesn't even know I'm here, I came because I felt you needed a friend to talk to"

Matteo scoffed out, he didn't mean to but it just came out "Unfortunately Nate we're not friends, we're brothers" he whispered out, as if he didn't want to believe his own words

Nate sighed out "you know you don't have to make sense of it all immediately" Nate muttered, facing forward as he looked at the bottles of whiskey on the floor and table.

Matteo turned to look at Nate "how are you so calm about this"? He asked and Nate just smiled softly

"Trust me I'm freaking out plenty" he whispered, looking at his intertwined fingers in front of him "but freaking out won't help anybody, if anything it'll only cause more damage" he muttered obviously referring to the drinks on the ground and table.

Matteo suddenly realized the state of his apartment, he sighed out. "It helps me cope okay" he explained guiltily and Nate just shrugged as if he didn't mind. They both drifted into complete silence again, as Matteo continued his thinking. "How could he keep something like that from me" he blurted out, his voice was back to holding that pain Nate had heard at Spade's office.

"I can't say I know why he kept it from you, but I'm sure he didn't mean any harm, and neither did he mean to hurt you" Nate explained

"Nate you don't get it, I've known Gio all my life, for a long time I called his father my father too because I believed it to be true, only for me to receive that letter and it changes everything"

Nate scrunched his nose up and looked at Matteo "wait, who sent the letter by the way"?

Matteo just shrugged "I don't know, I just found it in front of the door in the cabin at Italy, no return address, nothing" Matteo mumbled out.

"So.. you found a letter your mother wrote to you which you never knew of, and you didn't bother about who sent it"? Nate asked, this kind of got Matteo and he paused thinking for a while

"Well, it doesn't matter who sent it okay, the fact still stands that Spade kept it from me, I trusted him with my life, I could literally die for the man" Matteo muttered

Nate sighed out "I know Matteo, but I don't think he kept it from you because he wanted to hurt you and whoever sent it to you wanted you to hate Spade and you're giving them exactly that" Nate explained.

He saw the way Matteo looked at him, as if actually considering what the young man was saying. Now that he thought about it, Nate might be right, but it didn't excuse what Spade did.

But now he really wanted to know who sent the letter, they must have had a bad intention, probably like Nate said it. What if it was mystery man?

He sighed out and clenched his jaw. "So what am I supposed to do, just forgive him"? He asked and Nate just shrugged.

"I'm going to tell you what you told me when I asked you the same question, do what you feel and think is right, you will have to forgive him some day" Nate muttered, seeing the conflict in the blonde's eyes

He never thought he would be in the position where he had to talk to the blonde just like he'd done for him when he was having Spade trouble.

They both just sat in silence and looked in front of them. Matteo was thinking hard about what Nate had just told him. For once he felt like something was missing, but it still didn't mean he'd forgive Spade so easily, he had broken his trust.

He'd still be by his side but Spade would have to earn his trust again. But he will do well to find out who sent the letter and why. They must have had to be someone close to their mother.

****

Nate stood at the door and watched Spade, the man had been like this since the whole Matteo and letter thing. He always looked distracted and lost, it bothered Nate greatly, he could understand how Spade felt, regardless of what happened, Matteo was still his brother.

Nate sighed out and walked towards Spade, he stepped in front of the man and placed his hand on Spade's shoulders, before he felt Spade's hands go around his waist, resting his head on Nate's torso.

"You've got to stop thinking about it you know"? Nate muttered out and Spade just let out a deep sigh.

"He hasn't showed up in days, he's not picking up my calls" he looked up at Nate and the worry was evident in his eyes "I don't want him to do something to himself, he's all I've got"

Nate sighed out and placed his hand into Spade's hair as he started playing with it "He's going to be fine, just give him time he'll come around, he's just mad and I guess everything is overwhelming for him" Nate muttered.

Spade sighed out and some how inhales his sweet scent before he looked up at Nate again, seeing the young man already dressed "You ready"? He asked and Nate nodded before Spade got up and kissed him on the lips.

They had both agreed to go see his sister today, like Bernie had said, she was still in Sydney, so they were going on Spade's private jet. Spade led Nate out of his office as they walked out of the club and into Spade's car. They wouldn't stay there very long

Nate some how felt nervous, it had been almost a month since he'd seen his sister, so he didn't know what to expect but nevertheless he was happy he'd be seeing her again.

Just had to put this chapter so we'll know how Matteo was coping with the whole thing