All three of them sat on the chairs, Matteo facing both Nate and Spade on the other side, he could see the tension and the glances both men were stealing at each other, he wondered what went down when he was not here.

"You said something about people saying something about what happened at the party"? Spade asked making Matteo to look at him before nodding his head.

"Yes, after I dropped Stefano off at his place, I called a few friends and I was able to gather some info about the shooting" he rushed out.

"Wait, time out" Nate muttered, catching both their attention as both men's eyes rested on his, he looked at Spade first before his eyes landed on Matteo "What was the party for in the first place"? He asked, Matteo just stared at him blankly, as if he was talking in a foreign language

"You were there and you didn't know what the party was for"? He asked making Nate to let out a deep breath, his gaze resting on Spade for a few seconds before he shook his head.

"No, uhm... My uh.. my father asked me to go in his stead, he was the one invited not me" he explained, trying not to stutter

Matteo just looked at Spade, running his hand on his chin, as if scratching it. He was contemplating if it was a good idea to tell Nate what the party was for, if the kid didn't know, maybe it would be a good idea to leave it that way, the less he knew the better for him. His eyes moved to Nate, watching how the kid looked at him expecting an answer to his question, before Matteo's eyes moved back to Spade and he just just gave a discreet nod to Matteo, letting him know it was okay to tell Nate the truth.

Matteo sighed out before his eyes shifted to Nate once again "the party was an anniversary for Liam" he muttered, Nate just scrunched his brows in confusion, not knowing who Matteo was talking about

"The man that was shot dead in the head" Spade muttered lowly to Nate, and he quickly looked at him, before his eyes found Matteo again

"He was supposed to be celebrating his 12 years of being the Don of the American Mafia" Matteo muttered not missing the way Nate's eyes widened in shock and horror

"Wait, he was in the mafia"? Nate asked and Spade just whispered out to him

"Yes" Nate felt his whole body itch with unease, he'd never been to such a party before, even though he'd met a few people that were in the mafia, Spade included, he'd never openly attended a party hosted by one before, why would his father send him there? Wait, if the host was a Don of a mafia... He turned to look at Spade "does that mean everyone there.." he trailed off and Spade just nodded his head

"Yes, everyone you saw there tonight were either in the mafia or connected to it someway" Spade muttered, making Nate to take in a deep breath

"All except you" Matteo muttered making him look at the blonde, he swallowed before turning to face Spade

"How do you know I'm not involved with mafia business"? He asked and Spade finally turned to look at him, his grey eyes bored and blank as he stared at Nate

"Trust me if you were, I'd know" he nutters making Nate scoff

"Oh yeah? Because you've been watching me for a long time"? He almost gritted out and Spade just blinked very slowly

"Not the time" he muttered with a bored tone, Matteo just sat watching them both, they didn't seem like strangers that just met each other a few weeks ago, no watching them now sitting across from each other, they looked and sounded like a fighting couple with marriage issues, he almost snickered at his own thoughts, if Spade knew he was thinking like this, he'd kill him.

"Because you have him watching me, spying on me"? He asked and Spade just sighed out, he really hated this argument he was having with Nate, it was pointless, the kid was making a big deal out of nothing. Scoffing out lightly, he pushed the chair back, making a tiny scrapping sound as he got up from the chair. "Screw this, I'm going home" he muttered before walking away from the counter and Spade out of the kitchen.

Spade sighed out running his hand down his face, he could feel his body's tiredness, even his brain was tired and now Nate wasn't even helping matters by being like this "What was that all about"? Matteo asked and he just shook his head lightly, swallowing hard

"I don't know" he muttered out, his eyes resting on his fingers on the counter

"What happened"? Matteo asked and he just sighed out and looked at him

"The kid hates my guts, he doesn't even want anything to do with me, it's like everytime I do something hoping it'll change the way he sees me, it only makes it worse" he explained to Matteo, the blonde narrowed his eyes at Spade, rolling his tongue in his mouth before licking his lips.

He couldn't pretend anymore about the turmoil and dilemma Spade was going through, the emotional rollercoaster and the confusion his mind was currently passing through. As much as he wanted Spade to admit it first to him, he needed a push and no better time than now to give him that push.

"You like him don't you"? He muttered making Spade's gaze to cut through him, piercing his skin, someone else would have cowered away but not Matteo

"I don't know Matteo, I can't explain this strange feeling inside of me, it's messing with my head and I can't stop thinking about it, whenever I'm close to him or anything that has to with him I lose my cool, I can't think straight when it comes to him and it's driving me crazy, I feel like I'm losing my mind" he rushed out, frustration lacing his voice, Matteo could sense the despair in his words, even his eyes looked lost. He'd never seen Spade like this before, not even when his father was making life unbearable for him. "And I'm trying Matteo, I'm trying so hard to understand it but the more I try to understand it, the stronger it get and the harder it becomes to erase from my mind" he added.

Matteo just sighed out, not saying anything but just staring, he knew there was more and he wanted Spade to let it all out.

"I'm not gay Matteo, but why do I keep feeling this way around him? why do I think about him so much that everything else becomes irrelevant? It's like I don't even have control of myself" he whispered out, running his hands down his face, he could feel his resolve falter, the strong and heartless man wall he built around himself crumbling bit by bit.

"Have you tried talking to him"? Matteo asked and he just shook his head

"It's pointless, everytime we talk it never ends well, I mess things up and end up pushing him away even farther, and it kind of scares me, because if I push him away, how the fuck am I gonna understand this craziness inside of me about him"? He explained

"You haven't tried hard enough Spade, not as hard as I expect you to, if you keep pushing without stopping, he's ready to listen to you, he's ready to give you a chance to prove to him that you're not who he thinks you are" Matteo explained, Spade just watched him, taking in his words and digesting them "You like him right"? Matteo asked again and Spade sigh out before he nods slowly "Good, then go talk to him, not as Spade but as Giovanni, if you wanna get through to him, you have to let him in first, you have to trust him and then give him a reason to trust you" he explained making Spade to nod his head "He's a good kid, the few days I've spent with him during my spare time, I realized he just needs someone to listen to him, someone he can rely on, be that person and everything else will follow" Matteo urged as he watched Spade's eyes as he nodded with understanding He nodded his head towards the kitchen door "go talk to him, you might not be able to tell him or show him everything tonight, but at least get him to stay" he muttered and Spade just nods before getting up and walking out of the kitchen

Matteo was right, he wasn't trying hard enough, maybe because he'd been trying to discard this attraction he was feeling towards Nate, he didn't want it to be real, but now it was fucking real and staring at him dead in eyes, the only way is to confront it.

He wouldn't tell him right away that he liked him, like Matteo said, he had to establish a bond, a connection first and with time, he might be able to tell him about his attraction to him. First, he needed to stop him from leaving the house, it was pretty late and it wouldn't be safe driving out this time, especially after what happened tonight at Liam's party.

He walked past the living room, and headed for his bedroom, stopping in front of the door, his eyes dropped down to the knob as he contemplated going inside. Two things would happen tonight, either he convinces him or he finally pushed him away. He was hoping it'll be the former, he couldn't even think of the possibility of Nate finally being free of him completely

He shook his head and wrapped his hand around the knob, twisting it, he pushed the door open and stepped inside the bedroom.

Nate was standing close to the bed with his back to him, he had changed his clothes from the ones Spade gave him, to the tux he wore to the party. Spade felt his nerves drop to the pit of his stomach

Nate turned around when he heard the door shut, his eyes meeting Spade's warm, regretful and soft gaze, he almost wanted to ask what happened but he remembered what had happened earlier on, making him clench his jaw.

"You can't leave" Spade muttered catching Nate off guard as he raised his brows up in question

"Why is that"? He asked and Spade clenched his jaw

"Because it's dark out and very late, it's not safe out there, stay" he muttered and Nate just shook his head "I'll drop you off tomorrow as early as possible" he pressed making Nate to shut his eyes, tilting his head back. He didn't think he could stay and sleep in this house knowing Spade was in it too, not because he was angry at him, no but because he wasn't exactly in control of what his mind thought, the things that had been going through his mind since stepping into this house, weren't things he was used to thinking, it was messing with his head.

Contrary to what he told Spade and his tone sounding as if he was pissed off, he was feeling quite the opposite. Yes he was kind of angry with the man, but not to the way he portrayed it

And another thing that would make him not stay was his constant nightmares, he couldn't risk Spade hearing him talk and go through another episode of nightmares, it'll be horrible for him.

"You're not a puppet" Spade blurted out making him open his eyes to look at the man in front of him, he took two steps towards Nate "You asked if you were just a puppet for me earlier on, you're not a puppet, not once have I seen you as one, and yes you're right, I may have done and said some things to you before that I'm not exactly proud of" Spade muttered "but I wanna make amends, I'm really trying to redeem myself, just give me a chance" he pleaded with his eyes, his voice also coming out low as he stared into Nate's eyes.

Nate looked at him, feeling his palms go clammy with moist, he could feel his heart beat wildly as he stared at Spade, seeing the sincerity in his eyes He swallowed, still feeling his throat parched.

"You asked what I wanted from you before, he whispered "I want redemption, I want your forgiveness and I want another chance, let's start over" Spade muttered, Nate sighed out, thinking of how to answer Spade, not that he didn't know what to say but he didn't wanna admit that deep down he would give Spade another chance so they could start over, even if Spade didn't ask for it. "You don't have to answer me right away, but please just stay the night, and even if you still don't wanna have anything to do with me, by tomorrow I'll drop you off at your apartment and that will be it" he muttered, his eyes looking calm, gentle and almost as if he was sad. All these was confusing to Nate as he watched

Something definitely didn't feel right with how Spade was suddenly so eager to be on good terms with him. Asking for second chances and do overs. It felt awkward and anticlimactic to him.

"You can take my room, I'll sleep in the guest bedroom" he muttered before he turned around and walked out of the room, leaving Nate all alone with his conflicting thoughts. He sighed out and ran his hands through his tangled curls, trying to calm his racing heart

It's not everyday someone like Spade tried to convince you to give him a chance to prove himself to you. But why? That question kept plaguing his mind Why would someone like Spade even want to talk to him, get to know him.

The voice in his head was starting to build doubts in his mind, telling him Spade was only going through this stress because he wanted something from him? And it had to be something important.

He quickly shook his head, trying to supress the annoying voice in his head. 'he's using you' the voice jeered at him and he shut his eyes and willed himself to block it out

If he was going to think about this, he had to do it alone. Without the annoying voice of his doubts and mind.

Sweet 😁😁

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