Nate groaned out as he shifted himself on the bed, feeling the softness of the mattress against his back, he slowly turned his head, feeling the throbbing in his temple. He rubbed his eyes, everything felt hazy and achy, well mostly his head.

He managed to peel his eyes open, thank God the room wasn't bright. He gently got up, adjusting his eye sight to the room, his eyes landed on the covers, and his bare body.

Tiny bits and pieces from the previous night had started to surface in his mind, the more he tried to remember what happened, the more intense the ache in his head got. He gripped the sides of his head tight, shutting his eyes and grimacing.

He remembered going out with Spade to the fancy restaurant for dinner, he even remembered some of the things that happened, like how he watched the night sky and the city from the huge glass window, he remembered drinking wine and Spade telling him to slow down, everything was just rushing in at once, interlaping with each other, making his head to hurt even more

He remembered Spade almost kissed...... He paused as his eyes grew wide, almost bulging out of their sockets, he choked on air as everything came crashing down, all the memories from last night now making sense to him.

Everything that were once hazy were now clearing up, giving him the complete view of the scenario from last night.

He had kissed Spade. He got so drunk that he was even saying things he normally wouldn't say to anyone, let alone to Spade. He even called the man pretty.

He cussed out lowly and face palmed himself, he groaned out at how stupid he must have looked.

His hands moved towards his lips as he let his fingers lightly brush on his lips, the memory of him kissing Spade now crystal clear to him. He could still remember the way Spade's lips felt on his, everything was beginning to make sense now.

He groaned and plopped back down on the bed, why did he drink so much last night? He made a complete fool of himself last night. He shut his eyes, letting his mind take him back to last night.

He kissed Spade, it almost felt like a dream to him, but the absence of his clothes and the throbbing headache he was sporting, was proof enough that last night happened. He had actually kissed Spade, he couldn't quite remember what happened after or even what Spade had done after, it was as if everything after the kiss was just a blur

He racked his brain even more, trying to remember what had happened after the kiss, what was Spade's reaction to the kiss, but all he could remember was falling asleep, he didn't even know when Spade took off his clothes, leaving him in just his pants.

He bit his lower lip and cussed at himself. He was so stupid to have gotten drunk, he remembered all the drama he portrayed when Spade was driving him home, God, the man probably saw him as some stupid inexperienced kid.

He remembered even touching Spade's... Fuck. He was never going to drink anything alcohol ever again. But he didn't take too much, just three glasses of that strange wine that Spade had bought, but he remembered Spade warning him about slowing down if he didn't want to get drunk.

He ran his hands through his face before he pinched the bridge of his nose, he didn't even know what time it was. He looked to the bedside table and there he saw a glass of water, he was about to reach for it when he heard the door to his room open up, Spade walked in wearing just the white round neck he had worn inside his grey jacket last night.

He could see how the edges around the arm was tight around Spade's upper arm, and the large tattoo on Spade's arm running all the way from below his elbow all the way to his upper arm, and around it.

The shirt did nothing to conceal Spade's upper body muscles, how tight it fit, showing Nate almost everything underneath the top. He swallowed hard before his eyes landed on Spade's eyes, he quickly looked away as memories from what had happened the previous night invaded his mind, his whole body grew hot as he suddenly felt tense and awkward. "You're up" Spade muttered, his voice raspy and low, an indication he also just woke up, or he just had that much of a perfect and hot morning voice. Spade held a stack of paper bag with him, making Nate wonder what was in them.

He gently sat himself on the edge of the bed as he watched Nate. Nate still couldn't look at him in the eyes, he just let his eyes wander around the room, feeling a tad grateful that he had insisted in his drunken state that Spade brought him home, else it'll have been so fucking awkward for him waking up in Spade's place after the stunt he pulled last night.

He could feel Spade's eyes on him in an unwavering stare as he suddenly felt his body erupt with chills, making him realize he was still naked from the waist up and Spade was staring at him.

"Here, I got you these" Spade said handing him the paper bag, his eyes slowly moved to Spade's large hands as he examined the paper bag as if he didn't want to take it Spade noticed his hesitation "they're drugs, they'll help with the hang over"

He gently took them, making sure to give his hand a safe distance from Spade's, before dropping it on his thighs that were covered with the comforter. The silence in the room stretched as Nate didn't know what to say, he could feel the tension deep inside his bones, his eyes were now focused on the wall beside him, with so much concentration, Spade's eyes on him wasn't helping at all.

He felt hot all over, as his body was beginning to sweat, he knew Spade remembered what happened last night but he was praying he didn't ask or say anything regarding it.

"Nate" he heard Spade's throaty voice call out to him, making his little guy to effectively get up, thank God he had the comforter on, else he wouldn't have been able to hide the bulge in his pants, he slowly turned to look at Spade, seeing those soft, gentle and tender grey eyes on him, he swallowed. "About last night..." He didn't let Spade finish as he suddenly started panicking, feeling his heart beat wildly in his chest.

"I don't remember anything from last night" he rushed out, he could see the way Spade's face tensed up as his eyes held a ting of disappointment in them, he quickly looked away.

"You don't"? He asked as if he was expecting to hear something different from Nate, and the young man just shook his head. He knew he was lying, but he couldn't bear to hear Spade tell him how out of place he was last night, or tell him that he regretted what happened last night.

It was bad enough that he made a fool of himself in front of the man last night, it would even be worse if Spade began to chastise him for it or fault him for it

"So you don't remember anything from last night"? Spade's asked again, his voice going softer and a bit sad, or maybe Nate was just hearing things

He looked up at Spade and his eyes were conveying something to him that he didn't understand, something stronger He swallowed hard, bracing himself for the lie he was about to let out of his mouth. He shook his head "I only remember going out to dinner with you, but after that everything else is hazy and unclear" he said, his voice coming out firm, if he wanted Spade to believe his lie, he had to be sure and confident.

He saw the slight clench in Spade's jaw before the man nodded his head, slowly peeling his eyes away from Nate. He kind of felt bad for lying about something he did, something he could feel in his bones that he enjoyed doing, but it was better this way than hearing Spade tell him that last night was a one time thing, or blame it on the alcohol.

He could take anything thrown at him, but rejection was one thing he couldn't bear. It would break him from inside, especially knowing that he didn't regret last night, infact it was taking him everything in his power not to jump on Spade like he did last night.

Spade suddenly got up, shoving his hands in his pocket, he pulled out something, jingling in his hands before he stretched it out to Nate. "I said I had a surprise for you last night, here's your car key" he muttered, handing the keys over to Nate.

His eyes lit up as he saw the familiar set of keys with Spade, he couldn't believe his eyes, he quickly reached out for it, his fingers brushing against Spade's by mistake, making him pull his hands quickly with the keys in his grasp.

He looked at It, awe and excitement in his eyes as if he'd never seen the keys before. "You got it back"? He muttered, not realizing Spade had heard him, shoving his hands into his pocket back, Spade nodded.

"Yeah, Matteo drove it here for you last night"

Nate looked up at him, smiling a bit as he could feel the happiness in his chest and through his veins. He'd missed his car so much "Thank you" he whispered, Spade just hummed not saying anything, make Nate to almost frown at Spade's sudden silence towards him

He scratched the back of his neck as the whole room grew awkward again "Uhm..... I'm getting late for work" he drawled out as his eyes moved from Spade towards the bedside table "I should probably go take a bath" he finished.

Spade still didn't say anything, making him feel even more awkward and self conscious He cleared his throat again, looking up at Spade. "Thank you for last night"

Spade just hummed, his eyes watching Nate as he squirmed under Spade's gaze. It took a good few seconds before Spade realized Nate needed his privacy "I'll see you at the club later"? He asked and Nate just nodded before he turned around and left the room without turning back again

Nate let out a deep breath he didn't know he'd been holding, feeling his nerves relax, his tense shoulders sagged in relief. He thought that would never end.

He watched the door Spade had just walked out from, feeling his own guilt eat up at him, he didn't mean to lie to Spade about what happened last night, but it had to be done.

He realized he like Spade, but what was scaring him was Spade not feeling the same way. What if Spade already felt disgusted by him for what happened last night, he didn't even know of the man liked men too.

He let out a sigh before he dropped his car keys on the bedside table and the drugs, before he pulled the comforter from his body and trudged slowly towards the bathroom.

*****

With each punch he landed on the sand bag, he could feel his blood boil the more, he felt more angrier than he was before stepping foot into the gym.

If this was a public gym, people would probably be staring at him, maybe thinking he had lost his mind. Maybe he had, because he could feel the bones in his knuckles crack with each hit, he knew his knuckles were probably bleeding but he didn't care.

His grunts filled the whole room as he could feel sweat dripping from his forehead, his mind was in a haze, he could barely think straight. And he wasn't even thinking about the problems he was currently facing in the mafia, that was not enough to get him this riled up.

Only one person had that much power over him, one person could bring out the beast in him, and at the same time calm him down. Nate Brown eye, pink pouty lips that tasted like strawberries, soft and warm like cotton candy

He growled out as he felt himself slip through reality and the world of fantasy. He gave the bag a huge hit before he held it and stopped, breathing hard and resting his head on the bag.

He was frustrated in every possible way. He was emotionally frustrated, physically frustrated and sexually frustrated. It was all crashing down on him, making him lose his mind slowly but surely

It had been almost three days since his dinner with Nate and the morning after event, Nate lying about remembering it, he knew Nate remembered everything that happened that night, he could see it in the way Nate was quick to deny knowing what happened.

And the fact that the young man had been avoiding him as best as he could since that night. Everytime he saw Nate the young man had somewhere to be or something to do and he didn't like that Nate was avoiding him.

He felt very disappointed when Nate told him that morning that he didn't remember what happened the night before, he was dejected, something he hadn't felt in a long while.

He couldn't even bring himself to forget about that night, the way Nate's lips felt on his, fuck he could feel himself twitch with want.

He wanted to feel that way again, he wanted more of Nate. He craved him so badly that everything he did reminded him of Nate's lips.

It wasn't a good idea getting a taste of Nate's lips because now he wanted it, he wanted it so badly his whole body ached. It didn't feel like his thing with Scarlett, this went deeper than that.

He felt like a drug addict and Nate was the drug, he wanted more He had an idea what Nate tasted like and now he couldn't get it out of his head. Before, he could control his desires and keep them at bay, but now, knowing exactly what those pink, strawberry like lips tasted like, he couldn't keep a leash on himself, he wanted Nate and everything he had. He wanted Nate's perfect body pressed against his, moulding into one with his, making him growl out with pleasure.

Nate was slowly driving him crazy and he was not even trying to stop it.

So Nate is pretending huh 😜😜

Well, I wonder why

Actually I think I know why 😜😜