Song~ Cults - Glided Lily



⚠️Nightmare:⚠️

"No! Stop! Don't touch her!" Rylee shouts as they chain us both up to the ceiling.

"Stop! It was my fault! She didn't do anything!" She continues to shout at Mrs. Lucia and Aleksei.

Mrs. Lucia smirks at Rylee, "since she didn't do anything, your punishment is to watch as we punish her. You get to live with the guilt." Is all Mrs. Lucia says.

We had decided we were hungry, so while Lucian was asleep in the group room we all shared with about twenty other kids, we snuck out and made our ways to the kitchen.

Lucian had told us not too, he thought we would get caught- oh how we should have listened.

When Rylee and I had got our hands on some bread and chips, we had took a bite from the chips. But the second we did- Mrs. Lucia and Aleksei walked into the room.

When they realized what we were doing, Aleksei smirked at us, but Mrs. Lucia was fuming.

They had dragged us to the punishment room and now we were being chained to the ceiling, both of us shouting at them to let the other go.

We both knew this beating would be bad. No other kids had ever had the guts to try and steal food from the kitchen- and we were about to find out why.

"You two ungrateful brats!" Mrs. Lucia starts. "You think you can just leave your cell and do whatever the hell you want?" She questions rhetorically.

I shake my head repeatedly. "No! No that's not it!" My eight year old self shouts in full panic mode.

This school is worse than my own father.

"Good, since you have so much to say Diovanna," she spits my name in disgust. "Why don't we get on with your punishment now." My whole body shakes in pure fear, fear of what they are about to do to me.

"Would you like to do the honor?" Mrs. Lucia asks Aleksei.

No, no, no please.

I turn my head over to Rylee who has a fearful expression on her face, only the fear she holds is not for her, but for me.

"Of course." He replies, a wide smile adoring his face. "I have to start teaching my future wife the rules now." They both laugh evilly at the sentence while I grimace.

I will never be this vile creatures wife.

I'm not exactly sure how old Aleksei is but he can't be less than ten years older than me.

I watch as Aleksei grabs a whip off the table. My eyes widen in more fear.

"You've been a bad girl, haven't you?" He asks now turning towards me. I only nod my head in hopes that if I play along he may leave me alone.

Please leave me alone.

"Bad girls get punished. So you're gonna count every time this whip hits you back. You miss one- we start over." He spits with venom.

Please no.

I don't have time to register anything before the harsh leather hits my once smooth skin. I cry out in pain but do not for get to count. "One!" I cry out.

Another hit to my back. "Two!"

Another, "Three!"

Another, "four!"

Another, "five!"

Rylees screams and pleads for them to stop fell on deaf ears, They didn't stop until I had counted thirty whips.

My vision was blurred with tears and my head hangs low. I feel my hands being unchained before my boney body collides with the floor.

A breath of relief leaves my lips before I could stop it. It's finally over.

A manic chuckle sounds throughout the room. "You think we're done?" Alwksei's voice rings out. I feel his body get closer to mine laying on the floor before he puts his face near my ear. "We're just getting started." He whispers to me.

I feel my hands being tied together before my clothes are removed from my body.

I thought we were done?

Oh how wrong I was.

⚠️~end of nightmare~⚠️



I shoot up from my position on the bed, a gasp leaving my lips. Bile rises in my throat like it always does after every nightmare.

I rush out of the bed and into the bathroom- throwing up the little contents of food I had. When I finally finish puking, I clean up and brush my teeth before heading back into my room.

Those nightmares have been occurring a lot more often. A lot of my nightmares have been having Rylee in them.

Her death anniversary is tomorrow and Ive been doing everything I can to keep my mind off of it. Because if I think about it, I'm going to do something I'll regret.

Looking at the clock, it reads 3:43 AM. Only two fucking hours of sleep.

I glance at the left side of my bed to see Arabella fast asleep. Thank gosh I didn't wake her up.

I sigh, leaning against my bed with my eyes closed.

These past two weeks have been the same thing everyday. The non-stop nightmares, the little fucking sleep I get, and the little I eat. The bags have become very prominent under my eyes and my weight has dropped a couple pounds.

Oh well.

These past two weeks I have been avoiding my family like the fucking plague. I talk to them if I have to, but if I can slip out the door before they see me i don't bother speaking to them. They saw me at a low point and that shows I am weak. I'm ashamed. They probably think I'm broken or damaged, or they think I'm a monster because they've heard the rumors about Dove.

Whatever, doesn't matter now.

I have been going on countless missions these past weeks, alone. I've told Lucian about one or two of them but I decided I was doing these alone.

Not even Nikolaos knows.

I've been spending most of my time at Nikolaos's mansion whenever I'm not on missions. He had picked me up the day after the talk with my family, I had told him everything and he had just held me for the day. I had refused to speak at all that day after I had explained everything to Nikolaos, it was like I was in a trance and I couldn't snap out of it.

But eventually, I started talking and came back to my senses. I always do.

Arabella has been staying with Lucian during the days while I'm at Nik's or on missions- we kinda just abandoned school but who actually cares.

Arabella has even made friends with Ruth and Luna. Aunt Olivia, Uncle Raffaele, and Liam weren't to fond of the idea of the girl who held a knife to their necks to be their friends but when they realized the little girl was practically harmless, they reluctantly agreed.

Now I've noticed the new found protectiveness Arabella holds for both Ruth and Luna. I've noticed the new found protectiveness Aunt Olivia, uncle Raffaele, and Liam hold for Arabella.

I haven't discussed with anyone about what is going to happen with Arabella but I do know she isn't leaving. We may run a DNA test to find out who the father is, if the man is Italian like Sarah had originally said, we may see if he is actually dead.

Arabella refuses to sleep if I'm not in the room with her, so there is no way she is leaving.

Arabella not sleeping without me makes night missions kind of hard but I make it work.

She hangs out with Lucian during the day- hell sometimes even Elijah, but at night, she only tolerates me. How sweat.

So today I'll probably leave her with Elijah or Lucian and go to the gym for a couple hours and then grab a drink. I don't have any missions today, I don't plan on seeing Nikolaos today, i don't plan on talking to anyone today. Because today may not have been the day Rylee died, but it's the day I made a plan that got her killed.

And that feeling is worse than any other pain I could experience.

~/~/~

Arabella stirs beside me and I quickly put the Book I stole away. Don't want her looking in that.

"Morning sunshine." I chuckle at Arabella who yawns while she stretches like a starfish.

"Morning." She murmurs turning onto her stomach and shoving her face into the sheets.

I laugh at her antics. "Come on Bella, get up you need to eat." I tell her gently. Her head shoots up and a huge smile is on her face.

"What?" I awkwardly laugh as she just stares at me.

"You- you called me Bella! I've never had a nickname before!" She exclaims happily before jumping up and wrapping her arms around me.

Woah, I didn't even notice.

"Yeah- uh hope that's okay with you." She nods repeatedly, her arms still wrapped around me. "Okay, why don't you go brush your teeth real quick and we will get you down for breakfast since it's already 8:25." She gets off the bed and runs to the restroom closing the door behind her.

Kids.

~/~/~

I lead Arabella to the kitchen where almost everyone is at. It is 845 now and I might as well just leave to avoid my family.

When Arabella and I reach the kitchen doors I pause and bend down to her height. "Okay, I have some business to handle okay? You'll stay with Lucian." I explain to her.

She frowns at me. "You're always busy." She mutters.

A wave of guilt washes over me. "I know, after tomorrow I'll make it up to you and we can get ice cream, just us." She thinks about it before nodding her head.

"Okay, go eat okay?" I tell her and she opens the door before walking inside. I go to leave but Sebastian's voice stops me.

"Diovanna. I would like to speak to you." He states, his voice firm and demanding.

I pause my steps rolling my eyes before turning to face him. "Yes?" I ask.

He motions for me to follow him and I reluctantly do.

We go to the dining room where no one is. Sebastian turns to me before speaking, "you are avoiding us, all of us." He states.

Obviously dipshit.

I just shrug.

He visibly sighs. "I hope you know that none of us see you different, yo-" I cut him off, I don't want to hear this bullshit.

I don't need their sympathy, I don't need fucking pity, because I don't deserve it. All the pain I have suffered is punishment. I deserve it. I don't need their love.

"Yeah I get it, anything else? I was leaving." I ask.

"Yeah," he sighs deeply. "well there is a ball in a week. All mafias are attending, all." He emphasizes the all. "The underground king is making his once a year appearance, probably just to threaten us when he is actually the stupidest person to be the underground king."

Fuck.

"Shit- okay, alright, so we will see the Russians. The underground king won't do a thing, his title is scary- he is not." I muttered, and I'm not wrong. He is a dumbass, he holds power but has no idea how to use it. "Whatever I'll figure it out. I have got things to do. I'll be back." I say before I start walking out the dining room.

"Be safe." Is all he says before I walk out the dining room doors and to the direction of the gym.

In just a fucking week, I am going to attend a mafia ball where I'll have to face everything I've been working to take down. They know who i am, they know im trying to kill them, and besides, I have something they want, and they'll do whatever they need to do to me to get it back.

One thing is for sure, this ball will not end well.

I need to make protection arrangements for my family. I need to be sure the Russians cannot not harm them or use them against me.

It's my fault the attack happened two weeks ago, it will be my fault if someone in my family gets hurt at this ball. I obviously get everyone hurt.

I make it to the gym and stretch before starting a warm up on the treadmill.

I've got a lot to fucking think about.



"Hey Arabella, what do you want for breakfast?" I ask when Arabella makes her way over to me.

I glance slightly as Sebastian stops Diovanna to talk to her. She looks clearly annoyed but I wouldn't be fazed. She always gets like this on this day. And tomorrow. And probably the day after that.

She feels guilty when she shouldn't.

She misses Rylee. We both do.

"Can I have bacon?" Arabella's voice snaps me out of my thoughts.

I nod. "Yeah, of course. I'll go make it." I mutter standing up. "Why don't you sit and talk with Luca until the bacon is ready." She nods her head turning to Luca, she just stares at him, not uttering a word.

Luca gives her a weird look before they both bust out laughing.

So weird.

I shake my head while making my way over to the fridge and grabbing some bacon. I place it on a plate before putting it in the microwave for six minutes. (A/N: I don't know how to make bacon. My mom does it for me.)

"Hey can I ask you something?" A voice speaks next to me. I turn only to realize it's Sebastian.

"Yeah sure, what up?" I reply still waiting on the bacon in the microwave.

He sighs, "Diovanna, has anything happened these past few days? I mean, I know she was avoiding us but now when I see her walking to the door she always looks angry or upset." Sebastian explains.

Oh shit. Do I tell him the truth? Half truth? Lie? I'm not sure, Rylee was our best friend. We were the trio who kicked everyone else's asses in training cause we were good like that, But do we want Sebastian to know who she is?

Half truth.

"This time of the year, we had lost our best friend. She always gets a little upset, just don't pay it too much mind. She'll be fine." Is all I respond with.

I hope she'll be fine.

"I'm gonna give Arabella her food now, I'll see you later Sebastian." I tell him before walking away and over to Arabella.

I really do hope Dio is fine, lord knows what she will do on this day now.

When we were at that school, last year she had snuck out and went on a killing spree, Killed 187 people, and got a punishment.

She feels responsible, by it's not her fault.

It's not our fault. It's not her fault. It's only their fault.



I continue to punch the bag again and again trying to clear my head of the thoughts clouding my mind.

But one thing just won't leave my head.

That day.

My words just repeat over and over again in my head and it won't stop. It won't stop.

I need it to stop.

The pain from my knuckles cannot be felt over the adrenaline pumping through my veins. The continuous motions of my body being muscle memory. I continue to punch the bag like I've been doing for the past few hours.

Why? Why couldn't we have been quieter? Quicker? Maybe if we had changed to a different plan Rylee would still be here. If I had just listened to her.

Why didn't I listen?

A hand clasps down on my shoulder and i immediately turn around ready to swing at them but to my surprise, it's just Ares with his hands up in a surrender motion.

"Woah, sorry. Someone is definitely jumpy." Ares mutters breathing a sigh of relief. I glare at him for his words. Jumpy? Nah, I'm just prepared and he is not.

"Whatever." I mumble running a hand through my ponytail.

I hear Ares sigh heavily causing me to turn my gaze back to him. "Your hands are bleeding." He states. "Let's get you cleaned up." He says. When I go to argue, he just gives me a stern look and I shut up.

Whatever, suit yourself.

He leads me to a back part of the gym and into a room that looks to hold a lot of water, first aid kits, bandages, and a lot more stuff you may need at a gym.

Nice.

I take a seat on a couch in this seemingly lounge room is what we will call it.

Ares pulls out a first aid kit with some gauze and alcohol to clean my knuckles. When he has everything he needs he makes his way over to me and takes my right hand in a gentle grip and begins cleaning the wound.

There were a couple moments of silence before Ares breaks it. "You're avoiding us, why?" He asks not looking at me, continuing to clean my wound.

I roll my eyes, "you know what? I'm no-" I got to stand up but Ares cuts my sentence off and pulls me back down on the seat I was in.

"How about this, I'm not asking anymore. Tell me why you're avoiding us." He demanded, his eyes meeting mine. His eyes held a soft glint in them.

For me.

I take a deep breath and avert my gaze from his. "It was a moment of weakness, it shouldn't have happened and you all saw. Besides, I'm a very busy woman." I stare shrugging my shoulders still not looking at him.

Ares lets out a deep chuckle, "So I've heard you're a busy woman. However Diovanna, you are anything but weak. We all have a time where we need to let go or break down. You're not weak- hell from what I've heard, you have me afraid of you." He mumbles the last part annoyingly.

Now it was my turn to chuckle. "Yeah whatever you say Ares, just hurry up. I've got things to do." Like drink?

Ares scoffs, "no, you need to listen. I am not sure what's got you so down or upset but you need to know that we will always see you the same. No matter what happens or has happened, you are family and we will always have your back." He states before going back to cleaning and wrapping my knuckles.

My heart swells at his words. I've got a family, one that loves me. But do I need it? Is that family love real?

I just look at him dumbfounded.

I thought maybe, maybe if they knew I was Dove, knew what I've done or been through that maybe they would view me ask weak? Damaged? Cruel? I'm not sure. But here Ares is telling me they will always be there for me.

But do I deserve that?

Is that real?

She never got the chance to be loved by anyone, to have a family. Rylee died without any family by her side, and that is my fault. It's my fault she is gone, that what happened to her happened.

Deep breaths.

Inhale.

Exhale.

I clear my throat snapping out of my thoughts. "Yeah, uh thanks Ares. I gotta get going." I tell him standing up. "I'll see you later." Before Ares could say anything I was already out the gym door and on my way to my room to change.

I didn't want to talk or see anyone, I just wanted to forget.

Forget the guilt. Forget the pain. Forget the sorrow. Forget that day.

Because maybe- just maybe, if we had done something different, Rylee would be here. Here with me, with Lucian, she could have met Arabella. They would have been best friends.

I step into my bathroom and undress myself before turning the water too hot. I get in and let the steaming hot water hit my back. I stand there for a while before I wash my hair and my body and get out the shower. I dry myself off and make my way over to my closet.



I throw on a red tank top and some black/grayish jeans. I put my hair into a low braid before putting on my white air forces. I brush my teeth again and put on some jewelry before grabbing my phone and my AirPods and making my way to the garage.

I get the keys to a Yamaha R6 and drive off the property of the mansion.

I need a drink.

~~~



A/N: wattpad is being trippy asf. It won't let me upload any photos to my stories- at least if they are uploaded I can't see them. I'm really aggravated with that right now because I don't know how to fix it. Lmk if yall know how to fix it.

Besides that. I know this chapter is shit but next chapter will go into Dio's past with Rylee.

Thanks for reading.

Bye hoes.