CHAPTER FORTY-ONE

seeing stars

"for your safety, i'll go in before you," formulated walker. "you'll go in after me, making us look separate. i'll text you."

"you're my knight in shining armor," i said.

when the bell sounded, he sighed and exchanged seats with violet. as she came nearer, she gave me an apologetic smile, on behalf of madeline, i hoped.

i had developed a liking for violet. she seemed more human. i could actually have a conversation with her and not feel judged or the need to judge. i was certain that her friends didn't like me, but she seemed to.

mrs fennel taught the class as if nothing happened: terribly. that was her usual. she gave the class a worksheet that taught everything for her as normal. and i wanted to rip my eyes out as normal. when she interrupted our focus, her words were her usual criticisms. both mr grant and mrs fennel were bad teachers, but one was a refreshing reminder that teenage adults existed and the other was the bane of my existence.

violet spoke after a while of silently filling out a chemical structure diagram. "i never thanked you for giving me the role. i'm actually so excited."

"oh, no problem! i'm also excited," i returned. "the cast is great."

"it really is. when do you think we're going to film? not to be pushy or anything."

i hesitated, mustering up a way to come across as sure and professional. "around the end of the month." yeah -- that sounded about right! filming at the end of february. "of course, the official dates'll be discussed in the group chats. you put your number in, right?"

"mhm! i felt so elite scanning qr code 1," she giggled. "so, who's your favorite criminal minds character?"

the abrupt change in topic along with the realization that i haven't watched more than the episodes that mr grant put on hit me like a monster truck. "uh, probably elle," i improvised.

she sharply inhaled, turning over the worksheet. "oh... that's unfortunate. don't you wish she got more time on the show?"

"yeah, totally!" i forgot which one elle even was. worried she'd ask me more, i urged, "who's your favorite?"

immediately, she raved, "definitely reid." if she had said any other character, i would have been thrown out of my chair in shock.

we ended up talking until the end of the single period. luckily, about other shows and things i didn't have to make stuff up about. the whole class had their papers turned in and were waiting for passing period to start. violet waved goodbye to me and we parted ways, her heading to her group and me heading to my person.

"hello." walker greeted me with a tight smile. "ready for gym?"

"of course. are you ready for gym? the class where i absolutely destroy your ass in basketball," i had to remind him.

"just wait until we have a thumb war unit, then you'll be done."

this made me cackle. "how long have you been out of school? that is nonexistent!"

"blah blah blah." he smirked and put his arm around my shoulder as we followed the pack of kids going outside.

maybe we looked a little intimate in this configuration, because as we walked through the hallways, there were too many eyes on us for comfort. i didn't want to fuel any fire that would be impossible to put out, so i gently tapped his hand.

"yeah?" he said, glancing down at me.

"we look like we're method acting," i hissed.

he realized that i meant we looked like a couple and reluctantly undid our arrangement. i was fairly certain that it was reluctance. maybe i was imagining things, but the slight worsening in his facial expression and posture suggested disappointment. the possibility of him wanting to keep acting like a couple gave me a flutter of hope.

either way, the only person i wanted to think that we were together was mr conley. in a perfect world, jake would think so too, because that would tell him to back off. and in an even more perfect world, everyone would think it, free of trouble, because it would be true.

in gym, i tried to visualize how the stratagem we agreed on for the competition would go, mindlessly playing basketball and beating my classmates. if i completely fail at shooting movies, there was always shooting hoops. that sounded like a pretty solid plan z.

i wondered who would be there in the room while the competition happened, how early walker would go in before me, and how fictional i would be able to write my feelings toward him. naturally, i started to prepare for what i would write. every aspect was taken into consideration: the tone, the voice, the mood, as if i was reviewing for an english test. i had forgotten i was in gym class.

out of no where, i was hit with an ever so unfriendly reminder. and i literally meant hit. i was snapped back to my surroundings when a basketball went flying into the side of my face at around sixty eight miles per hour.

for a moment, everything stopped. time seemed to freeze as the impact registered. once the initial shock of it dissipated, a surge of unbearable pain that was mostly in my cheek, head and ear set in like lava cooling into hardened rock. the only sound i heard was ringing as i felt myself crumble backward to the ground, trying to steady myself with the hand that wasn't on my head.

i made out a muffled, "oh my god, i'm so sorry." i couldn't tell who it was from, though.

everyone sounded so distant, like the little reactions from my classmates or the footsteps that came running toward me. my eyes were shut tight from the searing pain, but i knew it was walker who knelt down next to me and supported my back.

"y/n? are you okay?" said walker. he sounded horrified.

"no, not really," i mumbled.

i could sense people trying to get a look at what happened as other distant voices drew nearer. one was so loud that it sounded crystal clear. mrs small urgently told everyone to get away. i appreciated that, but i didn't want walker to leave.

thankfully, she got on the other side of me. "let's get you to the nurse?" i nodded, though it hurt so bad to even move my head. "walker, would you be able to bring her?" mrs small requested.

after a few seconds, walker asked me if i could stand up. i slowly opened my eyes, but the brightness forced them into a squint. with great caution, i eased myself into a crouch before he steadied me. just like earlier, he wrapped his arms around my shoulder.

together, we made our way outside. the nurse's office happened to be across the hall, so i only had to take so many painful steps until i could sit down on a bed.

"how did that even happen?" i asked.

"i think it was that senior who was playing really aggressively," he said. now our footsteps and voices were clear. the ringing and muffling wore off.

"oh. makes sense," i said just as my head began throbbing again. kind of desperately, "how much farther?"

"we're almost there," he said. that was true. only around twenty seconds later, he guided me to a bed where i finally got to rest my head as he explained what happened to the nurse. all i could think about, though, was how this year would win the personal award for worst valentine's day yet.

the nurse, a kind woman with a no-nonsense demeanor, examined the bruise forming on my cheek and asked me a series of questions to assess the severity of the injury. after a while, she spoke. "well, you've got quite a bruise, but it doesn't look like anything's broken. i'm going to give you some ice for the swelling and some ibuprofen for the pain. i'd like you to stay here and rest for a bit before going back to class. if you start feeling dizzy or nauseous, you need to tell me right away, okay?"

i nodded slowly, relieved that i didn't have to go home and miss the competition. the nurse handed me an ice pack wrapped in a towel and helped me get comfortable on the bed. she turned to walker, who was hovering nearby with a worried expression.

"thank you for bringing her here. you can go back to class now," she said with a small smile.

he looked at me, and i could see the concern etched on his face. "are you sure she's going to be okay?" he asked, unwilling to leave.

the nurse nodded. "yes, she'll be fine. just needs some rest and observation for a bit."

walker turned back to me. "text me if you need anything, okay?"

i managed a small smile despite the pain. "i will. thank you for helping me."

he gave me a reassuring nod and left the nurse's office.

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thank you for reading chapter 41!