It had been a few days since (Y/n) had helped Lupita, and although the two of them hadn't been able to talk much at the time, Lupita had still gone out of her way to ask (Y/n) out for drinks so the two of them could continue their discussion. And saying (Y/n) was excited at the perspective of seeing Lupita again would be an understatement.

Not only was Lupita Uninfected just like her, but she was also a potential friend and one hell of a baddie. She reminded (Y/n) of Grey in a way, unbothered by others' opinion of her and kind of a hurricane. Maybe that is why (Y/n) admired Lupita so much in spite of not knowing her for more than a few days, other than the fact Lupita was also undeniably gorgeous.

"You're going?" Tobias called from behind her. (Y/n) hadn't heard him coming, but the moment she turned around to face him he had already made himself at home by leaning against her bedroom's door frame with his arms crossed over his chest.

Their eyes met but (Y/n) quickly averted her gaze.

Ever since that night Tobias had been acting weird towards her, playing the hot and cold card. (Y/n) never knew when he'd be ignoring her or willing to talk to her like nothing was wrong on his side. She had no idea what was going on in his head and wouldn't force him to talk about it if he didn't want to, but this situation was growing more and more confusing for her.

"Do you still have the map I drew for you?" Tobias continued to ask. Apparently this was one of his good moments.

"I do. Thanks." (Y/n) shot him a smile before turning back to her reflection in the mirror. She hadn't packed anything fancy when she had left the Uninfected Community, and hadn't done much shopping for herself either since coming to the city. Until now, she had mostly been relying on her meager pile of clothes and some she had borrowed from Tobias.

She feared she'd make a fool of herself next to Lupita, who looked so confident without even trying and with a style of her own.

"I really need to find a job." (Y/n) said, more so to her reflection than Tobias.

Still, he heard.

"Why?" Tobias asked maybe a bit more aggressively than he had meant to. His features tensed and a muscle ticked in his jaw. At the thought of danger this would put (Y/n) in. "You do know that would be incredibly risky, don't you?"

"I know. But I can't keep on feeding off of you guys' earnings." (Y/n) explained with a sigh. "I need to be financially independent if I want to make it by myself. I feel like a leech for living under your roof and eating your food, but not doing anything in exchange."

And I want to be able to do what I want, with my money.

So far (Y/n) hadn't been able to do much for herself considering she had been relying on Tobias and Marcus for most things. Earning some money of her own would grant her even more freedom than she already had in the city. There were so many things to do and see, and she wanted to take full advantage of her stay here. She wanted to go out with Lupita for drinks and be able to pay, she wanted to buy some new clothes so that she wouldn't be relying on Tobias's or her three spare tees. She wanted to experience life without any restraints.

Maybe she'd ask Lupita for some advice tonight, surely she would know about having a job in the city as an undercover Uninfected. She would have asked Tobias, but judging by his facial expression he wasn't too fond of the idea.

"You're not a leech." Tobias closed the distance between the two of them to stand behind (Y/n), a frown etched between his brows. "You're helping around the house, doing most chores... Finding a job as an Uninfected is dangerous. You shouldn't risk it."

I won't let you. Part of Tobias muttered in his mind. And he couldn't tell whether this was him talking or his Infection.

"I can do this, Tobias. And I want to do this." (Y/n) answered, only fueling his building frustration. Not that (Y/n) had any idea what kind of inner turmoil he was currently going through.

To her, this was just good old Tobias trying to look out for her, as a friend. And part of her knew he was right. But she couldn't just keep on depending on people around her for basic needs and necessities.

She was a grown woman, not a child. It was about time she started providing for herself.

Tobias wasn't going to back down without a fight though and the least he could do was try and convince (Y/n) this was a bad idea. Ultimately he knew the choice was up to (Y/n), although the darkest part of him would gladly restrict (Y/n)'s freedom to choose for herself if it meant keeping her safe. But he wasn't about to give into those urges.

Not yet, at least.

But that was the thing, wasn't it? There was no way for Tobias to know when his Protective instincts would completely take over and obliterate any sense of moral he currently possessed. His values had already taken a toll, the very moment he had fantasized about killing the man who had hurt (Y/n) on the night she had helped Lupita.

Of course, so far Tobias was still able to differentiate the good from the bad, still able to take a step back from his Infected thoughts. But he feared his rationality might slip if anything else happened to (Y/n).

"If you're worried about money I can give you some-"

"No." (Y/n) cut him off with a shake of her head. "I don't want to rely on you for financial security or money. I have to be independent, Tobias. And I know this is you trying to look out for me, but I really need to learn how to provide for myself. All my life I've let other people watch out for me. My mother, Grey, Marcus, You. I can't keep on doing that if I want a life of my own."

(Y/n) knew Tobias probably wouldn't like it, but she wouldn't back down on this. (Y/n) had to look out for herself. Still, her heart tightened uncomfortably in her chest as she met Tobias's gaze in the mirror. He looked pained, hurt, even.

Of course (Y/n) didn't know Tobias's reaction came from fear of something happening to her and him absolutely losing it. Still, she softened, offering him an apologetic smile.

"I'm so grateful for everything you've done and still do for me. But I can't keep on being a dead weight on your shoulders. Both for your sake and mine."

Tobias sighed quietly, his hand reaching out for (Y/n)'s shoulder but stopping midway. He couldn't touch her like it was nothing anymore. In fact, he never should have touched her in the first place.

His heart squeezed in his chest as he took a step back to put some distance between him and (Y/n).

Hell, in fact he shouldn't even be speaking to her right now. Not after the realization that he was in love with her. Not now that he knew he was a ticking bomb waiting to explode. Not now that he knew he was slowly becoming the monster he always feared he'd become.

No, Tobias needed to stay away from (Y/n). Both for his sake and hers.

But no matter how hard he tried to fight it, Tobias constantly found himself pulled back to (Y/n) one way or another. His thoughts always straying back to her and her safety, his heart always skipping beats when he thought about all the things that could happen to her when he was not here to protect her.

Now that he thought about it, maybe it had always been like this. From the very moment he had seen her at the city's Gates, already Tobias had been unable to stay away from her.

Why else would he have helped her out in the first place? Tobias could have let her be taken by the guards as an Uninfected, this wouldn't have been the first time he'd witnessed an Uninfected arrestation.

But on that fateful day, something about (Y/n) had called out to him, had pulled him in and set him into motion before he had even realized he was walking over to her.

Maybe he should have realized it sooner, should have seen the signs. For someone who prided himself on his self awareness, Tobias had been a blind fool. But he also knew that there was no way he could have turned his back to (Y/n) on the first day either. If (Y/n) truly was his Darling, his Infection wouldn't have let him.

No, Tobias had been doomed from the very start and no matter how many precautions he might have taken, his falling for (Y/n) had been inevitable. Written in his DNA in bold letters.

"Tobias?" (Y/n)'s voice tore him away from his thoughts.

He stared at her, trying to make sense of his own conflicting feelings. Tobias knew finding a job was unsafe for (Y/n), knew that she risked getting her cover blown, or worse, risked putting herself in danger when it came to other Infected out there.

But at the same time... Maybe financial independence would be a good thing. (Y/n) would be able to move out and find a place of her own if she wanted. Away from him. And surely the more distance there was between them the easier it would be for Tobias to deal with his emotions and Infection.

...right?

It's not safe. A voice that Tobias didn't really recognise as his own whispered in his mind, followed by endless scenarios of (Y/n) getting hurt, kidnapped or killed. A mix of bile and anxiety swelled in Tobias's throat.

He was gonna be sick.

"Are you okay?" (Y/n) insisted, worry edged in her tone as she gazed into his eyes. And he wished he could reassure her and tell her everything was fine. But it wasn't.

Tobias shook his head. He needed to focus. He couldn't let these thoughts swallow him whole. This wasn't who he was, this was his Infection talking, not himself.

He needed to keep track of this. To remember who the real Tobias was.

And the real Tobias probably would have let (Y/n) pursue a job if she had wanted to, both to put distance between the two of them and because he knew the choice was hers to make. All he could do was warn her and inform her of the risks.

"I am. Sorry, I just remembered I had to do something." Tobias finally muttered, still not sounding quite like his usual confident self. "Have a good night out with your friend."

And before (Y/n) could answer, Tobias was out of her room and hurrying to his own.

Tobias told himself he was doing the right thing, tried to convince the sick part of him that this was how things were supposed to be. But the farther away he walked from (Y/n), the louder the images of her getting hurt got and the more nauseating the pull at his heart grew.

She doesn't need me. She's a capable woman. Tobias repeated these words like a mantra in his head as he curled up in his bed. Trying to counterbalance the other voice in his head that tried to convince him that she needed him.

Tobias clutched at his pillow and buried his head in the cotton fabric. Maybe if he slept, this would all finally stop, and when he'd wake up everything would be back to normal. He'd go back to being his old untainted self.

Unfortunately for Tobias, this couldn't be farther from the truth. For this was only the beginning of his Infected symptoms, and once triggered, there was no going back.

































(Y/n) awkwardly stood in front of the bar she had been to with Tobias a while back. This was where Lupita had offered for them to grab a drink, and in spite of her traumatizing memories of the place, (Y/n) hadn't been able to say no.

So there she was, anxiously eyeing her surroundings for any signs of an enraged Infected out for blood. And if there was indeed one in the crowd, she could only hope they wouldn't be out for hers.

A shudder of dread trickled down her spine as images of a woman being stabbed right in front of her flashed through her mind.

It's okay. I can do this. She told herself, balling her hands into fists at her sides as she readied herself to finally enter the bar. Lupita was probably already waiting for her inside and she couldn't keep her waiting for much longer. Not when (Y/n) was already late because she had gotten lost on her way to the bar.

However, before (Y/n) could take a step forward, a familiar voice called out from behind her. A voice that made her heart falter in her chest.













A/N:

Hey guys! Hope you liked this chapter and that the wait was worth it! Just here to let you know that I finally posted the first chapter of a new story I've been working on! If you're interested in another yanderexreader story don't hesitate to check it out and leave your thoughts in the comments! I'm lowkey very excited for this one <3 It's called MEMORIA and you can find it on my profile <3