173

Sophia’s POV

It was very dark and I was up when I was supposed to be asleep. I was seated on the edge of the bed, staring at the faint outline of my belly. I could feel our baby moving sometimes. It made my heart swell with both excitement and fear. I wasn’t ready to admit it before, but now, it was impossible to ignore the thoughts racing through my head.

I pressed a hand against my belly, feeling the steady thrum of life growing inside me. The longer I remained seated and staring at my belly, the more doubts began to creep in, nagging at the back of my mind. Was I putting this baby in danger by staying here, caught between two worlds? The vampire realm, with its ancient politics, its dangers, its enemies—it wasn’t exactly a safe haven for a child, let alone a vampire child with his parents as the rulers of the realm.

I hadn’t told Ian about my fears. Honestly, I was getting tired of doing that, not to mention that I always felt guilty and bad afterwards. He had so much on his shoulders already. The council, the realm, the rebuilding after all the attacks—it was too much for him to carry, and I didn’t want to add to that weight. But it ate me up from the inside. I couldn’t trust that he could really keep us safe from our enemies.

I heard a knock at the door, and I quickly stood up, straightening myself. Ian stepped inside, his face lined with exhaustion but his eyes soft as they landed on me. “Couldn’t sleep?” he asked quietly, closing the door behind him.

I shook my head, forcing a small smile. “Just thinking. The baby’s been active tonight.”

He crossed the room in a few steps, his hand immediately finding its way to my belly. His touch was warm as he rubbed it softly.

“Do you ever wonder if we’re doing the right thing?” I found myself asking, my voice quieter than I intended.

Ian’s brow furrowed, and he met my gaze with concern. “What do you mean?”

I hesitated, trying to find the right words. “This world… the vampire realm, the council, the constant danger… Do you think it’s safe for the baby? For us?”

Ian’s expression softened, and he knelt in front of me, still holding my hand gently. “Sophia, I know things have been hard. There’s a lot going on, and I wish I could promise you that everything will be perfect. But I will protect you. Both of you.”

His words were sincere, but they didn’t ease the knot in my chest. “But what if it’s not enough? What if… what if this isn’t the right place for us?”

He stood up and sat beside me on the bed, his arm wrapping around my shoulders. “We’ve been through so much already, and I’m not going to let anything happen to you or our child. The council… they’ve started to come around. Things are changing. Slowly, but they are.”

I shook my head. “It’s not just about the council. It’s about everything. The attacks, the werewolves, the fact that we don’t even know who’s behind all of this. How can I bring a child into that? How can I be sure that we’ll even survive long enough to raise them?”

Ian’s face tightened at my words, and for a moment, I regretted saying them out loud. But I needed him to understand what was going through my mind. I needed him to see that I wasn’t sure anymore if this was the right path for us.

He took a deep breath, running a hand through his hair. “I get it, Sophia. I really do. I think about that every day, about how much is at stake. And yes, it terrifies me, too. But we’re stronger together. We’ve faced worse, haven’t we?”

I nodded, but my mind was still racing. “What if it’s not enough this time? What if all this fighting, all this danger… what if it breaks us?”

Ian turned toward me, his hand cupping my face gently. “It won’t. I won’t let it. You and our child are my priority. I would burn the entire realm down if it meant keeping you safe.”

His words were fierce, Protective, and I knew he meant every one of them. But there was still a part of me that couldn’t shake the fear. I thought about the look in Viktor’s eyes when he saw my belly, the barely-contained fury behind his calm demeanor. The council might be starting to accept me, but acceptance didn’t mean safety.

“Ian… I’m scared,” I admitted, my voice trembling slightly. “I’m scared that I’m putting our child at risk by being here. By being with you.”

He didn’t say anything for a moment, and I could feel his hesitation. Then he pulled me closer, resting his forehead against mine. “Sophia, I understand. I’m scared, too. But we’ve made it this far. You’re the strongest person I know. If anyone can handle this, it’s you.”

I closed my eyes, taking in the warmth of his words, the steady beat of his heart against mine. I wanted to believe him, wanted to trust that everything would be okay. But there was still a small voice inside me that wondered if we were making a mistake.

“I just… I don’t know how to stop worrying,” I whispered, my breath catching in my throat. “Every day feels like we’re one step away from something terrible happening.”

Ian sighed softly, brushing his thumb across my cheek. “I wish I could make that go away. But all I can promise is that I’ll do everything in my power to protect you. To protect our family.”

I nodded, but the uncertainty still lingered. “What if it’s not enough, Ian? What if something happens to you?”

He leaned back slightly, his eyes darkening. “Nothing is going to happen to me. I won’t let it. And if anything ever did… I’ve made sure you and the baby would be safe.”

I frowned, unsure what he meant. “What do you mean?”

He hesitated again, as if weighing his words carefully. “There are contingency plans. Things I’ve put in place just in case something goes wrong. You wouldn’t be left alone.”

The thought of Ian planning for his own death sent a chill down my spine, but at the same time, I appreciated that he was thinking about the worst-case scenario. “I don’t want to think about losing you,” I whispered.

“You won’t lose me,” he said firmly. “But if anything did happen, you’d be safe. I’d make sure of it.”

I looked at him, my heart aching badly. “I just want to know that our baby will be okay. That they’ll have a chance at a normal life.”

Ian’s face softened, and he pressed a gentle kiss to my forehead. “They will, Sophia. We’ll make sure of it. But it won’t be normal. Not in the way you’re used to. Our child is going to grow up in two worlds, just like you have. And they’ll be strong. They’ll have both of us.”

I nodded, leaning into him, but the questions still swirled in my mind. Could we really give our child a good life in a world full of danger and secrets? Could Ian really protect us from everything that was coming? I wanted to believe him. I really did.

“I’ll trust you,” I said quietly, my voice barely a whisper.

Ian squeezed my hand, his voice steady as he replied. “And I won’t let you down. We’ll get through this, Sophia. Together.”

But even as I rested my head on his shoulder, I couldn’t shake the lingering doubt. What if this was a mistake? What if staying here, in this dangerous, unpredictable world, was putting our child at risk?

I wanted to believe that Ian could keep us safe, that his promises weren’t just words. But deep down, I knew that there were no guarantees in the vampire realm—or the human world, for that matter. And as much as I loved Ian, I couldn’t help but wonder if love would be enough to protect our future. There were too many threats and we had too many enemies waiting for the right time to strike. And I didn’t think we would recover if they did strike.

I sighed softly, closing my eyes and trying so hard to push the thoughts away. For now, all I could do was trust Ian. Trust that we’d find a way to make this work. As sleep finally claimed me, I just knew that the worst was still yet to come.