Im now on my way home , Zee is looking at me as if she has so many questions.... In case you're wondering , I'm with my man rn , yes I know , I should be mad at him Kodwa I don't know how to love anyone else but him , I was forced into loving him , and now I love him more than anything, and yes I am mad but I don't want to lose him .

Nkosi: Mkami , ngyaxolisa . I know I'm always saying sorry but I really mean it .

Me: I said one more chance is all I'm giving you Nkosi and you messed up . What am I supposed to do manje?..

Zee: Wait , MTASE THIS IS NKOSI??( she's chuckling) ( I don't know what's funny about this whole situation)

Me: Nkosi , maybe I should've let you enjoy your engagement party and left you peacefully...

Nkosi: No baby , I don't love her as much as I love you .

Me: ( I'm laughing , like so hard tears of laughter Ofc are coming out , Zee and Nkosi look at me as if I'm crazy )

Zee: Mtase are you okay ?...

Me: Fancy you say you love me but I mistakenly just showed up to your engagement party with someone who's not me , show me where the love in that is . You don't love me Nkosi , you love that I'm your Wife . Not me . ( I'm now crying , Zee is hugging me , and she's brushing my head , she knows when I'm not okay that calms me down )

Nkosi : Ngithanda wena Nokukhanya , not because of the fact that you're my wife but because of who you are . Khanya I fell inlove with you , as much as I didn't want to admit it , you caught my heart , the day I first saw you when I brought food for you . I fell inlove with the innocent Khanya , the Khanya who didn't know how to kiss , the Khanya who wakes up in the morning stands by the balcony and looks at the garden for a good 10 minutes before walking in and playing a gospel song before she makes the bed , a Khanya which then kneels down and pray after that goes to shower and walk downstairs . The Khanya , who always comes to me and askes " baby uyabona lama iPhone, how do I love from here" . That's the Khanya I fell inlove with , not that your my wife then I'm forced to love you , no i allowed my heart to love you . And now I'm begging you Khanya , cela ungixolele .

(Whyy am I smiling )

Me: Nkosi you hurt me

Nkosi : I know and I'm so sorry give me a chance to make it right ...

Zee: I hope usho njalo nje , while uyolobola uNkanyezi.....

Nkosi: No , I'll stop everything to show Khanya ukutsii ngiyamthanda . ( then he looks at me .) Sthandwa Sam , ngyaxolisa mama .

Me: It's okay Nkosi , ngiyakuxolela. I understand...

Zee:(laughing) you nywandastand, you nywandastand ini manje mtase ?? Iyikho nje leyo Nono , uk'wenza islima nawe uyavuma ?..

Me: No Zee , uxolisile and i forgive him because ngiyakthanda ... Me forgiving him releases the hate and anger I have rn , and it allows me to find peace and closure about this whole situation..

Zee: Ngeke mtase uslima siphelele nje wena ...

Me: Hhai ngeke phela Zee uyang'thuka ke manje

Zee: Ngzowenze njan ngoba ngati azithathi ekhanda.

Me: Zee noma ungathini I forgive him because I love him ....

Zee: Nono messes can't you see ukutsii he's now taking advantage of the love you have for him...

Nkosi: ngyathembisa Zee I won't hurt your friend,''s feeling , ngcedile. Khanya please pack your things siye e khaya ( the Ndlovu mansion ofc.)

Zee looks at me as I nod to agree

Zee: Haike to go is to see ( while slamming her hands together) Anikho right nina. Zee then walks out

We were now at home , It's around 21:00 , Nkosi walks in nami , greys my parents , I tell them that I'm leaving with Nkosi , which they were okayy with . I head to my room to pack .

Ma'M: Ngane yam , your eyes are red kwenzenjani ?

Guys I don't know why my bottom lip started shaking, next thing my cheek is wet from the tears running down , uMa then hugs me .

Ma'M : Wenzeni uNkosi Khanya . Do you even wanna leave with him ?

Me: yebo mah .

Ma'M : pho ukhalelani?.

Me: it's just that I'll miss you ma ( I didn't have the heart to tell her .)

Ma'M : Pho uyakala , hai Khanya , pack umyeni wakho ukulindile .

After packing we head out to the dining room where they were sitting and talking . Nkosi then stood up to shake my dad's hand as a way of saying goodbye , while I was hugging uMa afterwards I hugged uBaba, Nkosi took my bag and went to the car and I followed shortly afterwards .

We drove to the Ndlovu's silently , when we got there , I geeeted uBaba, uMa and excused myself because " I'm not feeling well" . I then walk up stairs to Nkosi's room .

I took a shower got out wore a panty and got in bed , I couldn't wear pj'z , I didn't have energy to open my bag and look for them ,and I couldn't help but think , maybe it's time I give Nkosi some , because if I satisfied him sexually, he wouldn't be thinking of another girl. I kept thinking of ways I could initiate it .. I guess I fell asleep while thinking ....

Nkosi's pov:

I know I messed up again and Khanya is too good for me , but can you blame me . She won't be ready anytime soon and I have needs , I saw it better to marry someone who'll satisfy my needs . See I don't love Nkanyezi but she rides it so good , so I figured that while I love Khanya , and give her every, Nkanyezi would just be there to satisfy my need you know , but clearly I was stupid , I should've just kept her a fling .

I then check the time it's 02:13 , Nkanyezi has been calling me , and I don't feel like talking to her rn . I then get up and head to my room, I walk in and find Khanya sleeping so seems so peaceful , but cold because she's cuddling herself like a caterpillar. I then grabbed the blanket in the closet and gently put it on her , I then get in .

I pulled her closer to me and she held onto me not letting go , showing how much she needs me right now .... I then held her in my arms then fell asleep ...