I scanned the airport, which was quite full. Today was the day of my faculty for a parent-teacher conference, which Aunt Nuan offered to attend in my father's place. Of course, my father would never come. In fact, the seniors said that if the parents were busy, it was fine. The teachers and the dean only wanted to talk about teaching and learning, including careers after graduation. But Aunt Nuan said she wanted to come ....

The last time we saw each other was when I went home that day. When I came back here, I had to sign up. I didn't go to the freshman welcome activity since I didn't want to go yet. I will wait until the semester starts. To be honest, I was quite worried. I was afraid I wouldn't get along with anyone. What if my faculty friends didn't like me? What would I do?

As for the things sent from home, I took them back to the dorm. I tried to open them and discovered that they were gifts. The first box was a model robot, the second box was a toy car, the third box was a notebook and the last box was Lego blocks.

Aunt Nuan doesn't remember which box was sent in which year, but from what I'm guessing? if it is as I think, they were birthday presents.

The Lego blocks and toy cars must be from when I was in elementary school. Kids that age often play with toys like these. I'm not sure about the robot model because it may be a collector's item, but it looks pretty expensive. So it should be when I was in high school, already being a bit older. I decided to keep it all.

As for the notebook... the condition of the box looked new. I'm sure it's the most recent box. Whoever sends these gifts each year has thought carefully about the age of the child and what kind of gift is appropriate for them.

I used to think that if they had been sent to the wrong house, why did my father have to throw them away? If it is discovered that it was sent to the wrong house, it should be returned or, if it can't be returned, it should not be thrown away far from other people.

Aunt Nuan said she had never seen anyone deliver it. Aunt Nuan was the one who usually woke up before everyone else in the house, and she said that always on the same date, she would find the box placed in front of the door. At first, she showed it to my parents, but they threw it away. Then, she began to put them away. Everything seemed suspicious to her.

Aunt Nuan herself had always been suspicious about whether or not I was biological, but when she finally found out, the reason she didn't tell me was simple: Torfan forbade Aunt Nuan to tell me the truth. It was in my youth that I discovered that I was an illegitimate child. If before, Aunt Nuan had suddenly told me or shown me that I was sent a gift every birthday month, that would have made me suspicious. Besides, my father forbade her strictly to tell me about them. But now, since she already knew, she decided to give me all the gifts she had saved. Now my head was full of hope. Although the recipient's name was not mine, it was always sent in March. March is my birth month. These things are similar to birthday gifts. As for the recipient's name....

"I can imagine a lot of things, but the most likely is... that was my real name, the one my birth mother gave me, before my father changed it to Typhoon." I used to wonder who my mother was, where she was, if she was okay, why she left me, why she didn't love me, why she didn't even give me a name.

I want it all to make sense instead of not loving me.... My mother is another person I pray for to be happy and healthy every day no matter where she is in the world.

There is no evidence that my assumption is correct. Another thing is... Aunt Nuan said it has been two years since there have been no gifts. It's possible that no more gifts are sent. It's like something with no name, no return address, nothing at all.

I think it wasn't mailed because:

#1 I assumed it was posted the night before my birthday, and at those times the post office is closed, as it is only open from 8 am to 4 pm. #2 The post office would not have placed it in front of the house. #3 If there is no name or address, it meant it didn't go through the post office delivery system.

That means someone left it there?

So how would I know who it was? There are no security cameras around there. But if my guess is true, that would be great. I was a kid whose parents didn't buy me many toys. It was different from Torfan, whose room was always full of toys. I used to feel disappointed that I didn't have toys to show my friends at school. But really...I could have some.

"Phoon."

"...."

"Phoon." I quickly looked at the person who had stopped in front of me. Aunt Nuan was wearing a rather unusual outfit. I don't usually see her in something like that. Something more formal.

"Does Auntie look nice?"

"Yes, you look very pretty auntie."

"Shall we go, what time is the meeting?"

"My group meets around 1:00 pm," I said as I stood up. "Let's go."

"Okay, take me for a walk around Chiang Mai."

"Well, although I'm not too sure about the route either."

"Are you still getting lost again?"

"Not so much, I'm better. Phi Fah..." I fell silent as I realized I had accidentally said Phi Fah's name. "Phi Fah... he always drove me around town so often that I remember the way better now."

"Oh... Khun Tonfah?" said Aunt Nuan as if she had just remembered something, as we went out to find a car. "How is he?"

"Yes, he... From what I've seen, he's fine."

"He'll definitely be better looking. When he was young, everyone liked him."

"Yeah, he's still like that" I said quietly. "Aunt Nuan" I called. Now, we are in a songthaew to go back to college.

"Yes?"

"I... I won't be with Phi Fah anymore. " I decided to tell everything to Auntie Nuan. The other person who heard the whole story made a sad face, but she didn't look so surprised.

"Actually... that doesn't surprise me at all. Coming from the Young Master... I'm not that surprised. Now, I'm probably not the Young Master anymore, because he fired me. Khun Rit... yes... If I have to be honest... he was always rather selfish."

"...Yes." I nodded slowly. It might seem a bit wrong to think of my father that way, but sometimes I really can't help but think about it

"It must be a difficult decision for you, right?"

"Yes, the hardest in my life."

"But no matter what, you've never turned your back on your family. I understand." Aunt Nuan said in a kind tone, reaching out to stroke my head gently.

"Khun TonFfah will understand."

"Will he? Even though I was so cruel?"

"He will. Even back then, he always understood. He's been with you since you were little, always helping me take care of you often when he went to play at our house. I think... a person like him is not someone who will investigate anyone's information. No matter how distrustful he is, he will always respect and honor every decision of others."

"So... Even though Phi Fah may not know what happened to Torfan, it's not something that can be kept a secret for long. Even if he does know and probably understands, it's good that I've distanced myself from him."

"That's right."

We got off the songthaew and walked to my faculty. I came here the day before, the day I was supposed to report. After finishing my business, I went back immediately. I didn't go to greet my friends in the other faculty, even though my superiors told me to meet them.

"I can't go in with you, Auntie," I said, frowning with concern. The seniors on duty outside the meeting room said that students were not supposed to go in. Only their parents could.

"But it's okay, I've prepared the papers and written them very well," Aunt Nuan said, lifting her bag. "That way I'll know what this faculty is like and if it's right for you, Phoon."

"Thank you," I said with a big smile, watching her enter the meeting room. I went out and sat on the bench outside to wait.

It might be like Aunt Nuan said.... Phi Fah is the type who respects everyone else's decisions, doesn't interfere, doesn't get too involved and always respects others.

Phi Fah once told me, "I believe that every decision you make, you have thought it through, and I will respect that decision, because really, it must have been the best one at the time."

But I don't remember what we were talking about at the time that made Phi Fah say that. It would be good if he didn't know anything more, than I wanted him to know, because if Phi Fah knew the truth, that in my father's eyes, would mean it would definitely be because of me.

I don't expect Phi Fah to understand... but I hope that someday I will have the opportunity to come back and apologize and explain everything. And when that day comes... I hope Phi Fah will forgive someone as cruel as me....

"Hello." I turned around and saw a man coming up to greet me. I guess he was a freshman like me. He sat on the bench next to me with a friendly demeanor and a big smile on his face.

"Are you waiting for your parents?"

"Oh, yeah... Are you waiting too?", I asked back, feeling a little nervous.

"Yeah... There aren't many other freshmen."

"They must have gone somewhere else to wait."

"So, should we sit in the cafeteria and wait?"

"Ah... Okay, sure." I stood up and followed the other person, confused.

"What's your name? I forgot to ask you." He turned to ask me with a smile on his face.

"Oh, I'm Typhoon."

"Hm... My name is Easter. You can call me Ter."

"Nice to meet you."

"Oh... Uh."

"What's wrong?" I asked in surprise when Ter suddenly paused.

"No, nothing... I just thought you were going to make a joke, like, 'Easter bunny' or something. like that."

"... Did I have to?"

"No, haha...that's why I just say call me Ter." That made me raise my eyebrows in surprise. When the two of us walked into the faculty cafeteria, they looked so cheerful....

"Really? Is there anyone who still makes jokes like that and does it for days?"

"Yes, my roommate.

"Do you live in the dorms?"

"No, I live outside, but in my building they randomly assign me a roommate."

"Oh." We sat down, talked and got to know each other. I hadn't sat down and talked to someone like that in a long time. Like I said, I wasn't at my old school anymore, so I was away from my naughty friends, and I got picked on all the time.

Could it be Easter... the friend who said by Phi Fah? I thought... Because he told me that I'm definitely going to meet some good friends.

"Really? I like taking pictures too" Ter said, his eyes lighting up as we talked about our hobbies. "But maybe they're not that good yet. I haven't practiced taking pictures for a long time.Have you been been taking pictures for a long time, Phoon?"

"Many years."

"So you always carry a camera?"

"Yeah, it's a habit," I said, taking the camera I carried.

"Wow, that's great. I haven't gotten to the point where I carry a camera everywhere I go."

"Whenever I see something I want to take a picture of, I can take it in time."

"Can I see the pictures?"

"Here you go." I handed him my camera. Ter took it and opened it. We'd only been sitting here a few minutes, but Ter had already had two cups of cocoa.

"Do you like cocoa?"

"I love it, do you like it, or do you like tea?"

"I do like it," I said as I picked up my own cup of tea and took a sip.

"I'm indifferent to tea."

"Why?"

"It's not sweet."

"Is it wrong if it's not sweet?"

"It's wrong. Sweet water has to be sweet. Anyone who doesn't like sweet drinks will be executed."

"But this is tea."

"Tea also has to be sweet."

So, you only like sweets, right? ...

"Phoon, your pictures are beautiful. Wow..." said the other person with wide eyes. That made me smile, why is Ter the kind of person who makes me smile easily? "What kind of lens did you use?"

"Let me see." Then we talked cheerfully about cameras. I've never heard anyone talk about cameras like this before. I don't usually have fun talking this way.

"So why did you get into veterinary school?", I asked.

"Because I like animals."

"Oh, I think you're like a little animal."

"Are you trying to make fun of me?"

"No, I think you're like a little hamster."

"That's funny."

"No, really."

"So... you're like a cat."

"A cat?"

"Yes, a cat."

"It's not the same thing" I argued.

"Then I'm not a hamster."

"Okay."

"Then why did you get into this faculty?"

"Hmm... I don't know. I probably got in because... they thought I couldn't get in." So it was. Then, suddenly, a phone rang. It was Ter's, he picked it up and answered.

"What's wrong?"

[...]

"I'm in a coffee shop near my faculty."

[...]

"I'm with a friend. Come here."

[...]

"Would you like me to order you something while you come?"

[...]

"Okay, hurry up." Then he hung up. "My friend will come." The other person spoke after hanging up.

"Oh, so you want me to leave?"

"Hey, why would you leave? We're here together."

"But isn't your friend, Ter, coming?"

"Okay. Does that make you uncomfortable?"

"No, but won't your friend be uncomfortable?"

"Not at all."

"That's fine."

After waiting about ten minutes, someone came into the store with a motorcycle key in his hand. His hair was a little frizzy, probably because he was driving. He looked around the store before he saw Ter waving at him, walked over and sat down next to Ter.

"Phoon, this is North, my roommate. North, this is Typhoon, my friend."

"Why are your names like that?" the person named North turned to ask, before turning to look at the glass of green tea Ter had ordered. "Did you order less sweet for me?"

"No, regular sweet."

"Ter, I don't like too sweet."

"That's your business."

"Ah, but this is my glass."

"But I asked for it."

"You're just going to drink it."

"Don't be so picky, North."

"I don't want to be a diabetic like you."

"Why not? I'm going to get gout someday anyway." "There's no way you'll get gout," North said in annoyance before reaching out to grab a glass of green tea to drink. "Ah, I forgot. Sorry, my name is North."

"Hmm."

"What's up, Mr. Ter?"

"Come on, come on."

"Hey, you want me to call you an idiot in front of my friends?"

"You dare?"

"How could I dare? We just met. So what will they think of me?" I burst out laughing at the words the two people in front of me were arguing about. It seemed like a pointless and energy-consuming discussion, but I don't know why I like it.

"Okay, let's do it again. My name is North. You can call me North."

"North, you annoying bastard."

"Hey, why? Just North. Just Ter. Just Phoon." I laughed even harder at North's words. My shoulders were shaking. I hadn't laughed that hard in a long time.

"It's okay, my name is Typhoon, you can just call me Phoon."

"It's okay, just Phoon," North said. Ter sighed slightly.

"What's the problem, just Ter?"

"Don't listen Phoon, it's silly, North." Ter sighed, even deeper. "Oh, he's studying electrical engineering."

"Engineering?", I turned to ask. That's not so surprising, is it? Seems like a good choice.

"Yes, and also studying veterinary medicine?"

"That's right." I nodded.

"Where are you from?"

"Phuket."

"Wow, speak to me in southern Thai, will you?"

"Suddenly, you're telling me to speak like this, but I can't do it." I said, unable to keep from laughing.

"Ter is from Rayong," North said. "Say 'hello' in Rayong, Ter."

"Don't tease me."

"So where are you from North?" I asked.

"Lampang."

"I've never been to Lampang. I've only passed through there."

"I've never been to Phuket either. I've only passed through there."

"Passed by where?"

"Oh, that's right, you passed by where?" I asked the same question as Ter, which caused North to stop.

"Oh, you can't go through Phuket?"

"No," I said, "It's the end."

"Why can't I? I'll stop by and show you," North said annoyed. "I went through there, then swam across the sea, you animal."

"North, you should stop."

"You have to."

"Don't be stubborn about something like that, okay?" said Ter, shaking his head slightly.

"Nonsense, huh?"

"Are you looking for a gang?

"No. Phoon agrees too, right? North, don't steal my chocolate."

"Give it to me" North snatched the chocolate from Ter's hand and drank it all through a straw. "How was it? You're crying, Ter."

"North, you idiot, I just ordered it," Ter said as if he was starting to whine.

"You're such an asshole. I don't want to be your friend anymore."

"Why is the word friend between us so fragile?"

"Not yet. Order another one for me."

"You've had enough, Ter."

"No, order me another one again, and you're buying."

I watched the two of them argue happily. Ter seemed cheerful and cute, while North was funny and seemed to be very annoying. It was ridiculous. I discovered that the two were roommates who rented together. North was studying electrical engineering. I think people like North are the kind of people everyone wants to be with. Just being with him a little bit makes them feel a lot more comfortable.

He is completely different from me.

We exchanged LINE and contact numbers and then parted ways. When the meeting was over, I drove Aunt Nuan back to the airport and then went back to my dorm.

Today was a very good day for me.

I folded the letter and put it away in the drawer like every day. When I thought of Torfan, I remembered that.... She had been dead for about two years and the gift boxes that were sent every year stopped being sent two years ago. The same two years... Is there something related, or is it just a coincidence?

____

After I met Ter, I met Foam, a friend from the same college. We became close faster than I thought we would, including North. I went to hang out in North and Ter's room about two or three times. Everything seemed to get better and better after having friends. At least I had someone to talk to, laugh with, and go places with.

But many times when I would go back to my room, I would just collapse on the bed, exhausted. Then I would think about Phi Fah, think about how he was doing, if he had eaten, the same questions kept going around.

I talked to Aunt Nuan more often. At least before I went to sleep, Auntie would ask me how my day had gone. We didn't talk much because she was busy. She had children and grandchildren to take care of too. She would just stop by to talk to me for a few minutes a day.

That was enough...

I... I never ask for much anyway.

If...if only I still had Phi Fah.

I really don't want to ask for anything. The period before the semester started was the hardest for me to accept, and what surprised me was that about Ter... and Phi Hill, the person I used to call Phi Fah, Ter and Hill... were lovers....

I felt surprised because they knew each other. When I found out that Phi Hill was courting Ter, that surprised me even more. I wasn't surprised that he was courting him...but that it was too much of a coincidence.

The first time I met Phi Fah again was when Foam took me to see Ter at the Moons & Stars contest. At that time, I met all of Phi Fah's friends, including Phi Johan, Phi Hill and Phi Arthit.

At that time, I didn't even dare to look at Phi Fah's face. I could not stop my eyes from showing sadness. I didn't know what Phi Fah was thinking, would Phi Fah still be angry?

To tell you the truth, at that moment, when I got lost with Foam, and Phi Fah offered to pick me up, I was happy. But when I realized what I had done... I couldn't look at him again. It was as if we had never met before.

It's good that we've never met before, isn't it? That's what I wanted, isn't it? Although my friends and Phi Fah's friends are friends, we don't see each other often.

Ter also seems happier than before. I am very happy that Phi Hill takes such good care of my friend. Ter is someone who deserves love.

A semester passed...and I am still the same. Some days, when I see Phi Fah, my heart hurts so much that I can't explain it. I still go back to crying and writing letters like before.

I met another friend named Daotok. North likes to tease him because his name sounds like a girl's name. And Daotok sighs every time he sees him. Daotok is a friend from the drawing club. I heard that at first Phi Hill brought all his friends to join the club.... Fortunately, the teacher didn't let the medical students join the drawing club.

It's quite awkward when we meet, but still... sometimes I still want to see him.

Yes... no matter what, I still want to be with him.... I heard some news about Phi Fah from what other people said. If I asked Ter, I would probably get more information, but I didn't dare to ask. I was afraid Ter would feel bad about what happened, so I decided not to tell him.

It's not a story worth telling....

Then, something even more surprising happened... when Ter told me that Phi Johan was courting North.

It's... it's a coincidence, isn't it?

I knew from the beginning that Phi Johan started talking to North because Ter told me about it, but from meeting him, suddenly... Phi Jo and North... were already dating.

At first, I was very worried because Phi Johan was one of the people who was rumored to be a playboy. But then I thought it was North. North is good at that. If Phi Johan was really a bad person, North wouldn't have gotten involved in the first place. Whether it was Phi Hill or Phi Jo, they were big news for this university because they were so famous. But Ter and North probably didn't know that much.

Well... Thank you, Phi Jo, for taking such good care of North. As for Phi Fah, more people love him after his two friends announced that they have boyfriends. I heard he had to change clubs because the girls were causing trouble. I could only follow Phi Fah's news silently.

It's harder to avoid Phi Fah. I think many times it is obvious that I am avoiding him. Phi Fah himself doesn't seem to want to get involved with me at all. He must really hate me. It still hurts... it hurts more than I thought it would.

Does it hurt that much... To be hated by the person I love?

Another thing that stressed me out was... taking the medical school exam. I tried to study to get into medical school again, but I didn't make it. It's not easy to take the exam. When the results came out and I didn't pass. Of course, the first person who called me and scolded me was my father. He was very angry because I disappointed him.

Will Torfan be disappointed in me too? I can't make Fan's dream come true. I can't become a doctor...

If I don't pass the exam, I have the option of taking the medical exam next year, but if I take it next year, I have to give up veterinary medicine, because the medical exam doesn't allow me to study beyond the first year. Or continue to study veterinary medicine. Another way is to take the exam for another faculty. If I take the exam for another faculty, I don't have to resign. I still can't make up my mind at the moment. My other friends know that I took the medical exam, but they don't know that I didn't pass.

It's the end of the year, I still dream about Torfan sometimes, but not very often. It's been a very good dream for a year now....

It's been a year that went by faster than I thought it would. Studying hard, taking difficult exams, meeting up with friends, spending time with friends, having fun together, doing activities in college, it all seems very hectic. At first, I thought it would be quieter than this, but it's a good thing it's this busy. Ter and North said in unison that Phi Fah is very friendly. I agree, and I think a lot of people would agree. He is really nice.

Phi Fah is the kind of guy that... Anyone can easily fall in love with.

_____

In the blink of an eye, the second semester is about to begin. During my last school vacation, I went to see Aunt Nuan and asked to stay for almost two weeks. Aunt Nuan said she would be happy to have someone to help her take care of her grandchildren. I just found out that I love children. As for the gift box...I still have it, but I don't know what to do with it. I can't think of anything, so I left it like that for now. Suddenly, there was a phone call that said it was Ter.

"Hello."

[Phoon, are you free?]

"I'm free. I just got back. What's up?"

[Let's party.]

"Party? What's the occasion?"

[To celebrate the start of the second semester.]

"Celebrate the start of the semester? Are you sure?"

[Sure, let's get something to eat.]

"Then you want to eat something. Okay, okay. Where? What time? Who else will go?"

[I'll pick you up with Phi Hill around five o'clock.]

"Phi Hill too?"

[That's right, why?]

"No reason... Then..."

[North and Phi Jo will also go.]

"Oh..."

[Let's go.]

"It's just that..."

[Let's go. We haven't seen each other for a long time.]

"I think it'll be better next time."

[Phooooonnnnnnnn, please please please please, come on. Foam will go too. North's friends will go too. Lots of people, lots of fun]

"Ter..."

[I beg you.]

"..."

[Phoooonnn.]

"Whew, will there be a lot of people?"

[Lots and lots of people.]

"Then... it will be a big table."

[Oh, a very big one]

"Alright, alright. I'll go."

[Great, Phoon. See you.]

"Okay."

I let out a small sigh after hanging up. Okay... It might be a little awkward if we have to meet, but... I still want to meet him.