Y/N woke up.

That's it.

He just woke up.

But it wasn't just waking up like any other day.

It was like coming up from underwater, gasping for air, like he'd been holding his breath for a really, really long time and finally, finally could breathe again.

Except he wasn't underwater.

He was in his bed.

His bed felt different? It was softer, maybe? And the room was brighter. He looked around. It wasn't his room.

Not exactly.

It was like his room.

Like someone had copied his room, but made it different.

The walls were a lighter blue.

The desk was wood, real wood, not that fake stuff his desk was made of. And the the window looked out onto trees.

Lots of green trees. He never saw trees from his window before, just the street and the next building over.

He sat up.

His head was pounding.

Like someone had been hitting it with a hammer, over and over.

And his stomach felt weird. Like he'd eaten something bad, or maybe like he was really, really nervous, the kind of nervous that makes you wanna throw up.

He looked at his hands.

They were his hands. He knew they were his hands. But they looked different too. Maybe a little older? He couldn't tell. Everything felt fuzzy, like he was looking through a blurry camera.

"What the...?" he mumbled. His voice sounded the same. That was something, at least.

He got out of bed.

His legs felt shaky, like they didn't really wanna hold him up. He walked over to the window. Yeah, trees.

Lots of them. And was that a lake? He could see a bit of blue through the leaves, something shiny.

He'd never lived near a lake before. He lived in the city. Cities don't have lakes right next to them. Do they?

He turned around. He saw his backpack in the corner of the room. Same backpack.

Black, kinda beat up. Okay, that was normal. Sort of.

He walked over to the desk. There was a notebook there. He picked it up. It was open to a page with writing on it. His writing. He knew it was his writing.

But the words they were weird.

It was like notes. School notes, maybe? But they were about magic?

He didn't take classes about magic.

He flipped through the notebook. More of the same. Runes, diagrams, words he didn't understand.

It was like someone else had been writing in his notebook. But it was his handwriting. He was sure of it.

He dropped the notebook back on the desk.

This was wrong.

Everything was wrong.

Everything felt like a dream, but it felt too real to be a dream.

Then, he heard a knock on the door.

Knock knock knock.

Three knocks. Loud. Like someone who really wanted him to open the door.

He froze. He didn't want to open the door. He didn't know who was on the other side. He didn't even know where he was.

"Y/N? You in there? You gonna be late" A voice said from the other side of the door.

A voice he knew? It sounded familiar. Like someone he should know. But he couldn't quite place it. His head was still too fuzzy.

"Y/N! Come on, man! We gotta go or Professor Sulthon is gonna yell at us again." The voice said again, louder this time. And Professor Sulthon? What kind of name was that?

He slowly walked to the door. His hand shook as he reached for the doorknob. He took a deep breath.

He turned the knob and opened the door.

Standing there, in the hallway, were two guys. He knew them.

He knew them, right?

One was tall, kinda lanky, with messy blond hair and a big grin.

Ira. It was Ira. But different. Ira was wearing robes?

The other guy was shorter, with neat brown hair and glasses.

Ren.

It was Ren too also in robes.

They both looked at him, like they were waiting for him to say something. Ira was still grinning, but Ren looked worried?

"Dude, you okay?" Ira asked. "You look like you just saw a ghost."

Y/N just stared at them. Ira and Ren. But what?

"Uh... Ira?" Y/N said, his voice still shaky. "Ren?"

"Yeah? Who else would it be? Come on, man, class is starting soon. Professor doesn't like it when we're late. Especially after last time, remember?" He shuddered dramatically.

"Last time?" Y/N asked. He didn't remember any "last time." He didn't remember any of this.

Ren sighed.

"Yes, last time, Y/N. When you accidentally turned Professor Sulthon's desk into a giant monster. Remember? Detention for a week?" Ren raised an eyebrow, like he was waiting for Y/N to remember.

This was insane. Completely, utterly insane.

But even though it was insane it felt familiar.

Not like he remembered this life.

But familiar in a deeper way like he'd seen it before.

And then, it hit him.

Like a bolt of lightning.

Memories.

It started with just his memories from yesterday? From the cafe? But other memories. Memories of of being a student here.

But different versions of Ira and Ren.

And memories of Rain.

But when he thought it was done they kept going. Memories flooded his mind lives, different worlds and scenarios.

He was once a knight, a teacher, a pianist, a doctor.

Rain.

The name hit him like a punch to the gut.

He remembered Rain.

But also Rain from the knight's order.

Rain from from where he was teaching.

Rain from from everywhere.

Rain.

Always Rain.

And suddenly, it all rushed back.

Not just this life.

But... all of them.

All 1204 of them.

Different worlds.

All at once. Like a dam had broken in his brain and all the water, all the memories, all the lives, came flooding in, crashing over him, drowning him.

He staggered back, grabbing the door frame to keep from falling. His head was spinning, his vision blurring. It was too much. Way too much.

Medieval battlefield, the baker's shop, the laughter of children, the Hospital room, the dark alley, the glint of a knife, The sky islands...

And Rain.

Rain in every life.

Rain smiling, Rain laughing, Rain being sweet, Rain being kind.

But also memories of Rain becoming dark.

Rain becoming possessive.

Rain becoming something else.

Something monstrous.

"Y/N! Dude! What's wrong?!" Ira's voice cut through the fog in his brain. He felt Ira's hands on his shoulders, shaking him. "Hey! Hey, snap out of it!"

He blinked, trying to focus.

Ira and Ren were looking at him, their faces full of worry.

Not the ones he knows.

But still Ira and Ren. His friends.

Of this life.

"I... I remember" Y/N whispered. "I remember... everything."

"Remember what? The monster desk? Dude, it was funny, but you don't have to feel that bad about it" Ira said, trying to joke again, but his voice was tight with concern.

"..."

Y/n looked at Ira, then at Ren.

The loop. It had reset.

Every single time, in the hundreds of lives. He meets Rain falls in love, and she becomes something unclear only for him to go to a new life.

He was back.

But somehow different.

This time he remembered.

How? Why now? Why after all those lives, all those loops, did he suddenly remember?

And why was he in this loop in the first place?

He didn't know for sure, but he could guess.

It was Rain.

It had to be Rain. She was the center of it all. Maybe she was the key to the loop.

The last life had been weird.

Distorted like a nightmare.

That's what it had been like, wasn't it? His mind breaking and his thoughts scattering.

Because that's how he had felt. Like he was losing his mind.

And the reason was that he was remembering all those past lives.

And now he felt different.

He looked at Ira and Ren again.

He couldn't tell them.

Because he tried before, and in those lives they were killed by Rain.

Ira was still holding onto his shoulders, his grip tight. "Dude, you're freaking me out. Just tell us. What's going on?"

Y/N looked at them, his gaze steady.

He had lived 1204 lives.

He had died countless times.

He had been happy, he had been sad, he had been everything in between.

He had loved, he had lost, he had suffered.

And he had learned a lot.

And one of the things he had learned, the most important thing maybe, was that Rain was something else.

Something dangerous.

Something monstrous.

Something that had been trapping him, looping him, torturing him, for who knew how long.