There were many ways to handle a life-threatening situation.

1. Remain calm and explain yourself clearly. (Did not do that.)

2. Apologize immediately and take responsibility. (Also did not do that.)

3. Blurt out something so ridiculous that your brain disconnects from reality. (Ding ding ding! Winner! )



Which was exactly what happened when I found myself in the King's study, standing in a puddle of spilled ink, while His Majesty himself stared at me in absolute disbelief.



"...Defense capabilities?"



King Alistair Vaelmont's voice was calm, measured, and dangerously unreadable.



I straightened my back, gulping. "Y-Yes, Your Majesty! Testing your defenses! Very important work!"



He tilted his head slightly. "My study's... defenses."



"Correct!" I nodded furiously. "I have bravely taken it upon myself to, uh, simulate an internal security breach!"



Silence.



The King stared at me.



I sweated nervously.



Then, finally, he sighed.



"...You're an idiot, aren't you?"



My soul left my body.



I could not believe my luck.



He wasn't going to execute me.



He wasn't going to order me thrown into a dungeon.



He had simply accepted that I was an absolute fool.



I could work with that.



I immediately bowed deeply. "A loyal idiot, Your Majesty!"



The King pinched the bridge of his nose. "Get out."



"Yes, Your Majesty!"



"Don't come back."



"Of course, Your Majesty!"



"And if I hear you've caused another incident, I will have you reassigned to the outer stables."



I gasped in horror. "Not the stables! Have mercy!"



The King sighed again. "Get. Out."



I bolted from the study, my survival instincts screaming at me to flee before he changed his mind.



As I practically ran out of the royal wing, I collided—again—into something solid.



A familiar, very unamused voice sighed above me.



"...Why am I not surprised?"



I looked up and groaned.



Duke Adrian Reinhardt.



Standing right there, arms crossed, watching me like I was the biggest headache of his life.



I straightened up quickly. "I am so glad you're here."



"Are you."



"Yes!" I gestured wildly toward the King's study. "I just survived an assassination attempt."

His eyebrow twitched. "By who?"



"The King's patience."



"...I have no words for you."



I grabbed his sleeve dramatically. "Your Grace, I made it out alive."



Adrian exhaled sharply. "Somehow."



"I survived, Your Grace." I patted his arm. "Cherish me while you can."



He swatted my hand away. "I will throw you back inside if you don't leave."



I gasped. "You would betray me like this?"



Adrian looked genuinely tempted.



"Go," he muttered.



I grinned. "With pleasure."



As I made my victorious escape, my system suddenly pinged.



[New Skill Acquired: Beginner Luck]

Through sheer dumb survival instincts, you have miraculously avoided death and disaster multiple times! Your luck has slightly increased!



I stopped walking.



I stared at the notification.



Then I burst out laughing.



"I GOT A SKILL FOR BEING A DISASTER?!"



Mara, who happened to be walking by, blinked at me in confusion. "Uh... are you okay?"



I grabbed her shoulders. "Mara. My system pities me."



She squinted. "That... sounds about right."



I cackled.



I was truly, officially, the most ridiculous maid in this palace.



And somehow... it was working out.