After everything—dodging assassins, surviving nobles, accidentally causing palace-wide chaos, and somehow ending up attached to the King for life—I thought maybe, just maybe, I could finally catch a break.



I was wrong.



Because the King, in all his overbearing, tyrannical glory, had decided that now—now—was the perfect time to ruin my life in a new and exciting way.



We were in the palace gardens, the only place where I could usually find some peace. The air was crisp, the moon was high, and the King, the cause of 99% of my suffering, stood in front of me looking... weird.



Not the usual I-am-the-mighty-king-and-I-will-destroy-you weird. No. This was worse. This was serious weird.



I didn't like it.



"Thalia," he said, his voice even more serious than his usual tone of impending doom.



I immediately took a step back. "I don't like this. What's happening? Are you sick? Possessed? Did someone hit you on the head?"



He closed his eyes briefly, as if gathering patience. "I want you to stay with me."



I blinked. "...Well, yeah? I don't exactly have a choice, do I? You made me your exclusive attendant."



His jaw clenched slightly. "Not as my maid."



I frowned. "So you're firing me?"



His hands twitched, like he was debating whether strangling me would be considered a romantic gesture. "No, Thalia. I want you by my side. As my consort."



Silence.



Pure. Deafening. Absolute silence.



And then, because I am a woman of grace and dignity, I burst out laughing.



"HAHAHA—wait, wait, you're serious?"



The King looked personally offended. "Why would I joke about this?"



I wheezed. "Oh, I don't know, maybe because you're the KING and I'm a maid who literally started working here by accident?!"



He crossed his arms. "That doesn't matter."



"IT MATTERS TO ME."



His expression remained unreadable. "Do you want to leave?"



I opened my mouth—ready to scream YES, ABSOLUTELY—but no words came out. Because, for some insane reason, I hesitated.



Oh no.



Oh no no no.



I grabbed my own face and groaned. "This is a scam. I'm being scammed."



The King smirked. "I am the King. Everything is a scam."



I groaned louder. "I should have just stayed a maid."



~~~



Because the King was a tyrant who did whatever he wanted, the next thing I knew, we were on what was supposedly a date.



I say "supposedly" because:

1. There were at least twenty knights following us, pretending to blend into the surroundings. Spoiler: They did not blend in.

2. People were staring at us like we were a circus act.

3. The King, who was allegedly a romantic interest now, was terrible at casual conversation.



We sat at an expensive restaurant in the city, and I stared at the pure golden utensils on the table. Who needed a solid gold spoon to eat soup?



I picked up the fork and inspected it. "If I sell this, how many houses do you think I could buy?"



The King sighed. "Eat, Thalia."



"Fine, fine." I stabbed a piece of steak and took a bite. It was incredible, but I refused to let him see that I was impressed.



The restaurant was too fancy for my peasant soul, and I felt incredibly out of place. I leaned closer and whispered, "I'm going to steal this napkin."



The King rubbed his temples. "Thalia, we own the restaurant."



I froze. "...Wait. You own this place?"



He nodded.



I slowly put the napkin back. "Okay. New plan. I'm going to steal the table."



The King choked on his wine.



Somewhere behind me, I heard one of the knights fall over trying to hold in his laughter.



The date continued in absolute disaster fashion, and by the end of it, I somehow ended up with a new job managing palace affairs because the King decided I needed "more responsibilities."



This was the worst date of my life.



And maybe... the best.



~~~



A few days later, I sat in the royal study, miserably flipping through a gigantic etiquette book that I was now required to learn.



Cassian, Adrian, and Damian were having the time of their lives watching me suffer.



"Never thought I'd see the day," Cassian mused, sipping his tea.



"She looks so... refined," Adrian said, trying to keep a straight face.



Damian nodded sagely. "Truly, she has grown."



I threw my book at them.



The King? Oh, he was no better. He stood in the corner, watching with amusement as I attempted to decipher noble behavior without losing my sanity.



"You did this on purpose," I accused, glaring at him.



He smirked. "You belong here."



I groaned, slamming my forehead onto the desk.



And that was when—after months of absolute silence—the system window finally popped up.



[Congratulations! You have successfully completed "How to Be a Proper Maid"! ]

[Next Course: "How to Be a Proper Lady"! ]



I froze.



I stared.



And then, internally, I screamed.



No.



NO.



NOT AGAIN.



I should've just stayed a maid.